FWB ignored me at bar ...

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Replies

  • markiend
    markiend Posts: 461 Member
    Three months into it I brought up the "relationship" subj and he said he wasn't ready, blah-blah-blah. Instead of walking away like I should have we continued our casualness for another 9months !

    FWB are for people who for want of a better phrase, emotionally unavailable.

    You now in hindsight realise you should have walked when you came up against the blah blah blah but settled for it probably in the hope it would turn into more.

    Chalk it up to a learning experience and do your best to move on. Delete him and walk away.

    sorry you had to learn the hard way... FWB don't work unless both parties are completely aware of what the arrangement is... and they very rarely amount to anything .
  • _Waffle_
    _Waffle_ Posts: 13,049 Member
    Met a dude at a bar, started "doing it" a couple weeks later. I tried to tie him down to a relationship but he wasn't ready. Kept going for 9 months. Tried to get him to commit again. No

    Started hooking up again without a commitment. Saw him with another girl and got jealous....Ask him for commitment??

    I'm seeing a pattern here.
  • SoDamnHungry
    SoDamnHungry Posts: 6,998 Member
    That was over 6weeks ago ... he hasn't tried to contact me at all. Not even to say "hi, how are you?"



    Relax, it's ok. That's why people keep groups of FBs. To avoid neurosis.

    thats called a stable of *kitten*

    I would like a stable of *kitten*.
  • daffodilsoup
    daffodilsoup Posts: 1,972 Member
    "He's just not that into you".
  • da_bears10089
    da_bears10089 Posts: 1,791 Member
    BTW, you are not friends with benefits, when you are hooking up with him in HOPES that it will turn into something, that's called desperation. try finding someone who actually wants to be with you
  • Carl01
    Carl01 Posts: 9,307 Member
    Not a universal truth with all guys but close enough to take it as one...

    A guy views a FWB as that,no strings,no commitment,no emotional connection,no pseudo relationship.
    If you as a lady don`t share that exact view then don`t enter into one or plan on being hurt.
  • WOW ... I didn't expect such a huge response and so fast too!

    Let's get one thing straight here ... I AM NOT A *kitten* and I'm not 12 ... LOL!

    In the end of this two year "thing", all I wanted was respect. Yes I know I allowed and settled and it didn't feel good and that's why I had to end it all! I'm trying to regain my self-respect cause I felt real low and didn't realize my state of mind until I found out about this other girl. I'm sure there were more girls over 2years, but learning of this one at this time was meant to be ... def not what I want! I haven't text him at all, just that one from fri about not saying hi ... i never planned on contacting him!
  • Alex_is_Hawks
    Alex_is_Hawks Posts: 3,499 Member


    Couple of questions:
    1. Why woudln't he come up & say hi to me???
    2. Do you think he's telling truth that he honestly didn't see me???

    Thanks for your time and no judgement please ... just honest advice!

    1. Does it matter? You walked away and rightfully so. It sounds like he's been disrespecting you for a while, so why does it still surprise you. He owes you nothing and you owe him nothing. why does it matter? It shouldn't.

    2. Again it doesn't matter. See above.
  • jennyrebekka
    jennyrebekka Posts: 626 Member
    That was over 6weeks ago ... he hasn't tried to contact me at all. Not even to say "hi, how are you?"



    Relax, it's ok. That's why people keep groups of FBs. To avoid neurosis.

    thats called a stable of *kitten*

    or, as i like to call mine - - a barn full of studs
  • richardheath
    richardheath Posts: 1,276 Member
    I want a committed relationship with no benefits

    It's called marriage. Not as good as it sounds, believe me.
  • Mobilemuscle
    Mobilemuscle Posts: 945 Member
    That was over 6weeks ago ... he hasn't tried to contact me at all. Not even to say "hi, how are you?"



    Relax, it's ok. That's why people keep groups of FBs. To avoid neurosis.

    thats called a stable of *kitten*

    I would like a stable of *kitten*.

    just make sure they are thoroughbred
  • Mobilemuscle
    Mobilemuscle Posts: 945 Member
    I want a committed relationship with no benefits

    It's called marriage. Not as good as it sounds, believe me.
    it actually doesnt sound that good
  • calibriintx
    calibriintx Posts: 1,741 Member
    He liked banging you. He never ever wanted to be in a relationship with you. He got tired of dealing with you. He saw you at the party. He wishes he hadn't see you at the party because you're annoying and clingy.

    Don't agree to a FWB situation if you don't want to just be FWB.

    ^ ding ding ding! This.
  • da_bears10089
    da_bears10089 Posts: 1,791 Member
    WOW ... I didn't expect such a huge response and so fast too!

    Let's get one thing straight here ... I AM NOT A *kitten* and I'm not 12 ... LOL!

    In the end of this two year "thing", all I wanted was respect. Yes I know I allowed and settled and it didn't feel good and that's why I had to end it all! I'm trying to regain my self-respect cause I felt real low and didn't realize my state of mind until I found out about this other girl. I'm sure there were more girls over 2years, but learning of this one at this time was meant to be ... def not what I want! I haven't text him at all, just that one from fri about not saying hi ... i never planned on contacting him!

    you're asking someone to give a *kitten* about you, when he never gave a *kitten* about you...
  • calibriintx
    calibriintx Posts: 1,741 Member
    I want a committed relationship with no benefits

    It's called marriage. Not as good as it sounds, believe me.

    You're doing it wrong.
  • ryry_
    ryry_ Posts: 4,966 Member
    Three months into it I brought up the "relationship" subj and he said he wasn't ready, blah-blah-blah. Instead of walking away like I should have we continued our casualness for another 9months !

    FWB are for people who for want of a better phrase, emotionally unavailable.

    You now in hindsight realise you should have walked when you came up against the blah blah blah but settled for it probably in the hope it would turn into more.

    Chalk it up to a learning experience and do your best to move on. Delete him and walk away.

    sorry you had to learn the hard way... FWB don't work unless both parties are completely aware of what the arrangement is... and they very rarely amount to anything .

    I saw a romantic comedy that begs to disagree with you

    MV5BMTQ2MzQ0NTk4N15BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwMDc2NDYzNQ@@._V1._SX640_SY946_.jpg

    Hmm...I wonder if it's on tv yet....

    Ok, I own it, but it was in the bargainbin...............................That was a lie, I bought the 29.99 Blu Ray combo pack.
  • WeepingAngel81
    WeepingAngel81 Posts: 2,232 Member
    raining_david_tennant.gif
  • Sovictorrious
    Sovictorrious Posts: 770 Member
    TLDR....Just go on Craigslist or POF
  • Jlennhikes
    Jlennhikes Posts: 290 Member
    You're not really 39 years old, right?
  • Mobilemuscle
    Mobilemuscle Posts: 945 Member
    TLDR....Just go on Craigslist or POF

    i found a nice bed recently on craigslist
  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,025 Member
    tl;dr
  • MityMax96
    MityMax96 Posts: 5,778 Member
    I want a committed relationship with no benefits

    OK, this made me laugh!

    Its the graveyard most of us end up in anyhow...

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

    Touche
  • Mia_RagazzaTosta
    Mia_RagazzaTosta Posts: 4,885 Member
    I want a committed relationship with no benefits

    someone beat me to it
  • odusgolp
    odusgolp Posts: 10,477 Member
    1. He is not into you.
    2. You need to put HIM on ignore.

    NEVER do friends with benefits if it's not what you really want.

    quoting and emphasizing for the great advice. fo reals.

    ^This times a MILLION

    yet again... let this be noted.
  • WeepingAngel81
    WeepingAngel81 Posts: 2,232 Member
    TLDR....Just go on Craigslist or POF

    i found a nice bed recently on craigslist

    and did you find someone to share it with on Craigslist as well?
  • Some_Watery_Tart
    Some_Watery_Tart Posts: 2,250 Member
    1. He is not into you.
    2. You need to put HIM on ignore.

    NEVER do friends with benefits if it's not what you really want.

    quoting and emphasizing for the great advice. fo reals.

    ^This times a MILLION

    yet again... let this be noted.
    Ditto.

    Walk away.
  • Mobilemuscle
    Mobilemuscle Posts: 945 Member
    TLDR....Just go on Craigslist or POF

    i found a nice bed recently on craigslist

    and did you find someone to share it with on Craigslist as well?

    Id be terrified to try

    I did the online dating thing on match and eharmony before.... nightmarish results....
  • arghbowl
    arghbowl Posts: 1,179 Member
    Too long, didn't read, but FWB FTW!
  • WOW ... I didn't expect such a huge response and so fast too!

    Let's get one thing straight here ... I AM NOT A *kitten* and I'm not 12 ... LOL!

    In the end of this two year "thing", all I wanted was respect. Yes I know I allowed and settled and it didn't feel good and that's why I had to end it all! I'm trying to regain my self-respect cause I felt real low and didn't realize my state of mind until I found out about this other girl. I'm sure there were more girls over 2years, but learning of this one at this time was meant to be ... def not what I want! I haven't text him at all, just that one from fri about not saying hi ... i never planned on contacting him!

    you're asking someone to give a *kitten* about you, when he never gave a *kitten* about you...

    Ouch! Can I chalk it up to he's a narcissist young boy and I let the amazing sex cloud my judgements???
  • arghbowl
    arghbowl Posts: 1,179 Member
    TLDR....Just go on Craigslist or POF

    i found a nice bed recently on craigslist

    and did you find someone to share it with on Craigslist as well?

    Id be terrified to try

    I did the online dating thing on match and eharmony before.... nightmarish results....

    Been there, done that, and learned to double bag it.