Why is this even remotely controversial?
Replies
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She's gorgeous and very inspiring. She might be my new girl crush. I only hope that I can have the motivation she does after I have children. Haters gonna hate.0
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I'm glad you can admit that it is hard for you.
Tell me where ANYONE says this woman is wrong by wanting to look any certain way. Oh, that's right - no one said anything like that. I love the irony in this post - it's alright for HER to tell others they should look a certain way... and somehow when people get upset about it they are doing the same thing and it's wrong? No women likes to be told they have to look a certain way but if that person happens to fit your ideal then it's ok? lolz...I don't think that's the message she intended to send, and I'm not personally offended by the picture and caption. But if you have
an analytical mind of any sort you can see that while she might intend her message to be about fitness and health it's obviously about appearance as her appearance is what's being referenced.
The OP wondered why the picture would be controversial and I've clearly explained why it is.
People seem to think its a "hater gonna hate" thing but its actually controversial because it's just another brainless message telling women they have to look a certain way regardless of health or fitness level.
And yeah... I'm sorry... if you can't see that, then you are indeed part of a greater problem in the war women fight against themselves and each other.
And that, my friend, is what is sad.
No, you are the one fighting against other women. You are trying to make it a negative that she has an attractive body and has worked for that goal. Would you be happier if she were 30lbs heavier? Is that a more positive image to send?
Telling women that it is wrong to want to look attractive or wrong to work towards that goal is YOU victimizing them.
Reading comprehension is hard.0 -
i have no place in my life for a drill instructor. absolutely not at all.
but someone delivering a single line meant to startle your attention and snap you out of the fuzzy warm cupcake clouds? Yes please.
mmm...cupcake clouds0 -
Not according to the article she isn't, not anymore.This woman is a trainer, a fitness model, and makes her LIVING do these things.
She has lots of free time then.
My only concern is that she spends that free time with her children.
If she can incorporate fitness into activities with them- i.e.- stroller walks to the park, pushing kids on swings etc. or does her work outs during naps or after they are in bed, then great.
If it takes away a lot of her time and attention from the kids, then not so great.
IMHO: kids come first.
My concern is that people think it actually take s a lot of time. Around 4 hours a week is plenty of actual workout time. The rest is calorie management.
yeah seriously - most people i know can spend four hours A DAY watching TV - so whats wrong with 4-5 hours a week exercising?
shakes head0 -
So, by the same logic, is this picture controversial?
The reason why this is getting so much backlash is not the content of the picture or caption itself. It's the discomfort of looking inward and actively thinking about those excuses. It's easier to point fingers at the "bully" than actually examine their lifestyle. It's definitely a projection issue.0 -
gah! no! swats cupcakes!0
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Where in this image did it say EVERY WOMAN? Why does this not also apply to men? Isn't it just as reasonable to say this image implies that I, as a man, should have breasts that look exactly like hers?Here's why this if offensive: the picture and caption imply that EVERY WOMAN should look exactly as ripped and thin as this woman does. The implicit message is that there is no excuse and therefore NO REASON for any female to look less fabulous than this woman does.
It doesn't say "you shouldn't use excuses to not change your lifestyle".
It says "you have no excuse to not look as sexy and fit as me".
I for one can think of many reasons why many women of all ages and types might not look anything like her while offering no excuses and pursuing the best, healthiest lifestyles there is.
To state it another way, this photo and caption is offensive because its clearly referencing outward appearance as the primary goal for a woman or mother to want to pursue fitness.
If you can't see how this victimizes women, then you're part of the problem.
Seems to me all of the messages you don't like do not appear in this image and only exist in your own head. Perhaps you should be offended at yourself and your own prejudices instead.0 -
I'm glad you can admit that it is hard for you.
Tell me where ANYONE says this woman is wrong by wanting to look any certain way. Oh, that's right - no one said anything like that. I love the irony in this post - it's alright for HER to tell others they should look a certain way... and somehow when people get upset about it they are doing the same thing and it's wrong? No women likes to be told they have to look a certain way but if that person happens to fit your ideal then it's ok? lolz...I don't think that's the message she intended to send, and I'm not personally offended by the picture and caption. But if you have
an analytical mind of any sort you can see that while she might intend her message to be about fitness and health it's obviously about appearance as her appearance is what's being referenced.
The OP wondered why the picture would be controversial and I've clearly explained why it is.
People seem to think its a "hater gonna hate" thing but its actually controversial because it's just another brainless message telling women they have to look a certain way regardless of health or fitness level.
And yeah... I'm sorry... if you can't see that, then you are indeed part of a greater problem in the war women fight against themselves and each other.
And that, my friend, is what is sad.
No, you are the one fighting against other women. You are trying to make it a negative that she has an attractive body and has worked for that goal. Would you be happier if she were 30lbs heavier? Is that a more positive image to send?
Telling women that it is wrong to want to look attractive or wrong to work towards that goal is YOU victimizing them.
Reading comprehension is hard.
LOL0 -
So, by the same logic, is this picture controversial?
The reason why this is getting so much backlash is not the content of the picture or caption itself. It's the discomfort of looking inward and actively thinking about those excuses. It's easier to point fingers at the "bully" than actually examine their lifestyle. It's definitely a projection issue.
stop posting pictures on the internet specifically trying to make me feel guilty and bad about myself for not changing the things that I claim to desperately want to change, that I know are within my power, but I cant take the initiative to do because the computer chair is so comfortable and I already know what Im going to eat for lunch... right here at this desk.0 -
You saw my Facebook feed, didn't you Tom?
Anyway, my original comments on a thread relating to this still hold true:
It's the caption. It is accusatory. If it were directed more as an 'I have no excuses' comment and wasn't followed up with her trying to explain herself, it might have done something more for me. As it stands, it's accusatory and not motivational - for me. For others, maybe it is.
That's not true...it's not the caption. I'd bet money that she could have put "I have no excuses" and still received as much, if not more, negative responses as the caption that is there now. People who aren't willing to put in the work and effort will find fault and butthurt in whatever they see in order to justify why "they can't be better".
They have a direct line to the whaaaaammmbbbulance and love to dial in as much as possible.0 -
Not according to the article she isn't, not anymore.This woman is a trainer, a fitness model, and makes her LIVING do these things.
She has lots of free time then.
My only concern is that she spends that free time with her children.
If she can incorporate fitness into activities with them- i.e.- stroller walks to the park, pushing kids on swings etc. or does her work outs during naps or after they are in bed, then great.
If it takes away a lot of her time and attention from the kids, then not so great.
IMHO: kids come first.
I hate when people assume that finding time for yourself automatically means neglecting your kids. I'm a bloody good dad, but still found time to get and stay in shape.
It's really not that hard to build time with your kids in as well as time working out - if you want to. I'm a working dad, and my wife works evenings, meaning she's not around when my daughter gets home from school, and generally sleeps in in the mornings because she got home late. End result is my schedule is more or less that of a working single-dad. I balance work, spending time with her, fitness and most recently schooling of my own. My one advantage is the flexibility of working from home.
An example of my day -
I get up, empty the dishwasher from night before, make breakfast for us both. I put my daughter on the school bus, then go running or lifting. Then I do my day's work until it's time to pick my daughter up from the bus again. Get her home, give her a snack, set her going on school work and extra-curricular academics until I'm done with work. Make dinner, eat with her, discuss her school day, mark her homework. Play a board game, or play outside if weather allows. She takes a bath while I do some of my school work. Then story time and put her bed. Then I do some more schoolwork, then chill out with one hour of TV show or a video game before bed.
No one said it was easy, but there are strategies and it can be done. You just have to want to do it.
P.S. When you are in better shape, you are much, much more able to have fun with your kids. I love being able to tire my daughter out at the park, rather than vice versa.0 -
So, by the same logic, is this picture controversial?
The reason why this is getting so much backlash is not the content of the picture or caption itself. It's the discomfort of looking inward and actively thinking about those excuses. It's easier to point fingers at the "bully" than actually examine their lifestyle. It's definitely a projection issue.
stop posting pictures on the internet specifically trying to make me feel guilty and bad about myself for not changing the things that I claim to desperately want to change, that I know are within my power, but I cant take the initiative to do because the computer chair is so comfortable and I already know what Im going to eat for lunch... right here at this desk.
INORITE! :drinker: :laugh:0 -
I like the picture and the message! It's inspiring and also breaks down stereotypes that people have about moms. She has confidence to post it. I'm happy to see it!
On another note I can understand why sometimes people respond negatively to things that say that they have things tougher and therefore everything that other people say is just excuses. It's probably not something I would say. Life is complicated and we can't presume to know what any random stranger is going through at any given moment...the list is endless, and at times shocking if you really knew it all. And I don't say this because I make excuses for fitness. Fitness has always been important to me, and when I feel down about my fitness I'm still very fit (I'm tough on myself this way). Still, while the message may not be appealing to everyone, I don't see it as a reason to get upset. She needed to say something to get her point across, most people find cliches as an easy way to do that. Plus it does get the point across in a few words and that's what really matters. She got her point across, I like the actual point. I don't feel bad about the caption because I know I'm not making excuses and I'm pleased with my fitness. And I am secure with myself in lots of other ways as well. And anything I said about people being offended by it was only speculation since it was mentioned in the op. I would not have thought any of that if someone had not presented the image as controversial. Maybe this is a manufactured controversy because otherwise this image would not have gotten as much attention.0 -
I'm glad you can admit that it is hard for you.
Tell me where ANYONE says this woman is wrong by wanting to look any certain way. Oh, that's right - no one said anything like that. I love the irony in this post - it's alright for HER to tell others they should look a certain way... and somehow when people get upset about it they are doing the same thing and it's wrong? No women likes to be told they have to look a certain way but if that person happens to fit your ideal then it's ok? lolz...I don't think that's the message she intended to send, and I'm not personally offended by the picture and caption. But if you have
an analytical mind of any sort you can see that while she might intend her message to be about fitness and health it's obviously about appearance as her appearance is what's being referenced.
The OP wondered why the picture would be controversial and I've clearly explained why it is.
People seem to think its a "hater gonna hate" thing but its actually controversial because it's just another brainless message telling women they have to look a certain way regardless of health or fitness level.
And yeah... I'm sorry... if you can't see that, then you are indeed part of a greater problem in the war women fight against themselves and each other.
And that, my friend, is what is sad.
No, you are the one fighting against other women. You are trying to make it a negative that she has an attractive body and has worked for that goal. Would you be happier if she were 30lbs heavier? Is that a more positive image to send?
Telling women that it is wrong to want to look attractive or wrong to work towards that goal is YOU victimizing them.
Reading comprehension is hard.
Great comeback! I almost had to pull out the Preparation H.
Almost.0 -
I've noticed women in particular like to make excuses for themselvs. They blow wat out of proportion that amount of work home life actually takes.
I was a single teenage mom with a job and full time college and managed good grades, a cared for child and a clean house.
My cousin has a full-time job and two children under 3 and her house is immaculate and she's in fantastic shape.0 -
Where on earth are you getting this implied message that she is telling women they have to look a certain way (like her)? Her message is simple - even if you have very little free time, you can still reach your goals. She isn't defining your goals or expectations. That's your role.I don't think that's the message she intended to send, and I'm not personally offended by the picture and caption. But if you have
an analytical mind of any sort you can see that while she might intend her message to be about fitness and health it's obviously about appearance as her appearance is what's being referenced.
The OP wondered why the picture would be controversial and I've clearly explained why it is.
People seem to think its a "hater gonna hate" thing but its actually controversial because it's just another brainless message telling women they have to look a certain way regardless of health or fitness level.
And yeah... I'm sorry... if you can't see that, then you are indeed part of a greater problem in the war women fight against themselves and each other.
And that, my friend, is what is sad.0 -
I've noticed women in particular like to make excuses for themselvs. They blow wat out of proportion that amount of work home life actually takes.
I was a single teenage mom with a job and full time college and managed good grades, a cared for child and a clean house.
My cousin has a full-time job and two children under 3 and her house is immaculate and she's in fantastic shape.
People tend to make life way harder than it needs to be. Not everyone is great at planning and time management. Some peoples lives *feel* harder because they're doin it wrong.0 -
You can tell her kids are not by the same man. Lol! Gosh seriously and seriously not jealous at all I will say the title is rude. Not that being out of shape is anyone's fault but there own, still I am sensitive. I mean who would really want to be friends with someone with that personality. It just seems like showing out to me. I find it hard to believe she has ever been overweight in her life and genetically I find it hard to think she will ever be. Plus to have three kids, well these result not typical.0
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Where on earth are you getting this implied message that she is telling women they have to look a certain way (like her)? Her message is simple - even if you have very little free time, you can still reach your goals. She isn't defining your goals or expectations. That's your role.I don't think that's the message she intended to send, and I'm not personally offended by the picture and caption. But if you have
an analytical mind of any sort you can see that while she might intend her message to be about fitness and health it's obviously about appearance as her appearance is what's being referenced.
The OP wondered why the picture would be controversial and I've clearly explained why it is.
People seem to think its a "hater gonna hate" thing but its actually controversial because it's just another brainless message telling women they have to look a certain way regardless of health or fitness level.
And yeah... I'm sorry... if you can't see that, then you are indeed part of a greater problem in the war women fight against themselves and each other.
And that, my friend, is what is sad.
This x a billion.0 -
I don't like it. It comes off as braggy and in poor taste. Tacky really.
I wouldn't have done it after having my first kid when I was super fit. If I'm in photos with my kids I'm wearing clothes. If I'm promoting a PT business or any business really from makeup to realty to anything with a photo, my kid's aren't in the shot whether I have clothes on or not.
It's not about jealousy because I've been there, superfit after having a kid, noticing other mom's who aren't. It never occured to me to put them down or "motivate" them. Even motivate them which is best case scenario what she was thinking implies superiority and assumes a lot about the challenges and priorities and values of other mothers.
If and when I reach my goal to look that way again it is definetely NOT on my "to do" list to take a photo like that and post it for the world to see. I also have a current friend who has precisely 3 kids and is thin and uses nannies and daycares as soon as possible. For her it's to do her job as a pediatrician and also to stay home some days with whoever is the nursing baby at the time. She is not toned fit, but just thin and healthy, and gorgeous. I respect her for that. I guess if your job is PT or fitness modeling or whatnot involving a fit figure you're gonna use your nanny and daycare time for that. To each his own. Just for your own sake don't go shoving it in people's faces no matter what your choices are. I have LOTS of mom friends with wildly different lifestyles and choices and it's precisely because we do NOT judge each other at all and offer nothing but support time for kids get togethers and mom get togethers.
Mom friends. She's not doing it right.0 -
Where on earth are you getting this implied message that she is telling women they have to look a certain way (like her)? Her message is simple - even if you have very little free time, you can still reach your goals. She isn't defining your goals or expectations. That's your role.I don't think that's the message she intended to send, and I'm not personally offended by the picture and caption. But if you have
an analytical mind of any sort you can see that while she might intend her message to be about fitness and health it's obviously about appearance as her appearance is what's being referenced.
The OP wondered why the picture would be controversial and I've clearly explained why it is.
People seem to think its a "hater gonna hate" thing but its actually controversial because it's just another brainless message telling women they have to look a certain way regardless of health or fitness level.
And yeah... I'm sorry... if you can't see that, then you are indeed part of a greater problem in the war women fight against themselves and each other.
And that, my friend, is what is sad.
I love the bolded. :drinker:
I find it hilarious too because these people screaming "Don't tell me what to do" are more than likely the same people who turn around and go on fitness forums with sob stories saying, "No really. Please tell me what to do, how to be, what I should aim for and what goals I need to accomplish."
*le. sigh.*0 -
I've noticed women in particular like to make excuses for themselvs. They blow wat out of proportion that amount of work home life actually takes.
I was a single teenage mom with a job and full time college and managed good grades, a cared for child and a clean house.
My cousin has a full-time job and two children under 3 and her house is immaculate and she's in fantastic shape.
People tend to make life way harder than it needs to be. Not everyone is great at planning and time management. Some peoples lives *feel* harder because they're doin it wrong.
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You can tell her kids are not by the same man. Lol!
wut?0 -
I feel like people are constantly competing for the "Busiest Parent" title. They need to relax.I've noticed women in particular like to make excuses for themselvs. They blow wat out of proportion that amount of work home life actually takes.
I was a single teenage mom with a job and full time college and managed good grades, a cared for child and a clean house.
My cousin has a full-time job and two children under 3 and her house is immaculate and she's in fantastic shape.
People tend to make life way harder than it needs to be. Not everyone is great at planning and time management. Some peoples lives *feel* harder because they're doin it wrong.0 -
Where on earth are you getting this implied message that she is telling women they have to look a certain way (like her)? Her message is simple - even if you have very little free time, you can still reach your goals. She isn't defining your goals or expectations. That's your role.I don't think that's the message she intended to send, and I'm not personally offended by the picture and caption. But if you have
an analytical mind of any sort you can see that while she might intend her message to be about fitness and health it's obviously about appearance as her appearance is what's being referenced.
The OP wondered why the picture would be controversial and I've clearly explained why it is.
People seem to think its a "hater gonna hate" thing but its actually controversial because it's just another brainless message telling women they have to look a certain way regardless of health or fitness level.
And yeah... I'm sorry... if you can't see that, then you are indeed part of a greater problem in the war women fight against themselves and each other.
And that, my friend, is what is sad.
have to look a certain way?
what way is that??? healthy????
since when is - "non-descript nationality healthy mother of three" the aesthetic demanded for women?
ETA - i cant count kids - more than one always looks like 40 -
So, by the same logic, is this picture controversial?
The reason why this is getting so much backlash is not the content of the picture or caption itself. It's the discomfort of looking inward and actively thinking about those excuses. It's easier to point fingers at the "bully" than actually examine their lifestyle. It's definitely a projection issue.
I find it equally as stupid.
If diet is the main thing to leaning out how does having one leg provide a barrier to that exactly? Or even working out with the suitable equipment? Am I supposed to cut him some slack simply because he has one leg.
Great transformation. Terrible message.0 -
You can tell her kids are not by the same man. Lol!
wut?
Don't worry about it. Someone doesn't understand genetics.0 -
So, by the same logic, is this picture controversial?
The reason why this is getting so much backlash is not the content of the picture or caption itself. It's the discomfort of looking inward and actively thinking about those excuses. It's easier to point fingers at the "bully" than actually examine their lifestyle. It's definitely a projection issue.
I find it equally as stupid.
If diet is the main thing to leaning out how does having one leg provide a barrier to that exactly? Or even working out with the suitable equipment? Am I supposed to cut him some slack simply because he has one leg.
Great transformation. Terrible message.
Wow/0 -
You can tell her kids are not by the same man. Lol!
wut?
Even if they aren't, how is that relevant to anything?0 -
So, by the same logic, is this picture controversial?
The reason why this is getting so much backlash is not the content of the picture or caption itself. It's the discomfort of looking inward and actively thinking about those excuses. It's easier to point fingers at the "bully" than actually examine their lifestyle. It's definitely a projection issue.
I find it equally as stupid.
If diet is the main thing to leaning out how does having one leg provide a barrier to that exactly? Or even working out with the suitable equipment? Am I supposed to cut him some slack simply because he has one leg.
Great transformation. Terrible message.
0
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