Wedding Ring Debate

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  • Iwishyouwell
    Iwishyouwell Posts: 1,888 Member
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    I can now take my ring off by merely shaking my hand once or twice. By the time I get to goal it likely won't fit at all.

    My wife would prefer I get it resized. I will not. I plan to either wear it on a chain around my neck or pick a "wrong" finger.

    As it stands now I don't even know where it is, as it slipped off a few weeks ago and is lost somewhere in my house.
  • ERMBSN
    ERMBSN Posts: 32 Member
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    I paid $3000.00 for my wife's ring. About 3 years ago she informed me she lost it. Last year I lost my while cleaning out the gutters. I looked for days and couldn't find it. I thought cool now we are even. LOL! Over the summer shes standing in the front yard. She looks down and finds my ring. what the heck. LOL!!!
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
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    I paid $3000.00 for my wife's ring. About 3 years ago she informed me she lost it. Last year I lost my while cleaning out the gutters. I looked for days and couldn't find it. I thought cool now we are even. LOL! Over the summer shes standing in the front yard. She looks down and finds my ring. what the heck. LOL!!!

    :laugh:
  • mamacoates
    mamacoates Posts: 430 Member
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    A wedding ring is a symbol of your union with your wife ... not a conversation starter. Further, some people regard the symbolism to be quite significant. Your wife may be one of these. Best to get it re-sized and back on the correct finger. Here's some fun facts for you to consider ....

    "The circle was the symbol of eternity, with no beginning or end, not only to the Egyptians, but many other ancient cultures. The hole in the center of the ring also had significance. It wasn’t just considered a space, but rather a gateway, or door; leading to things and events both known and unknown. To give a woman a ring signifies never-ending and immortal love."

    "The materials these [early] rings were made of didn’t last very long and soon were substituted with rings made of leather, bone or ivory. The more expensive the material, the more love shown to the receiver; the value of the ring also demonstrated the wealth of the giver."

    "According to a tradition believed to have been derived from the Romans, the wedding ring is worn on the left hand ring finger because there was thought to be a vein in the finger, referred to as the ‘Vena Amoris’ or the ‘Vein of Love’ said to be directly connected to the heart. While scientists have shown this is actually false, this myth still remains regarded by many (hopeless romantics) as the number one reason rings are worn on the fourth finger. Another theory thought to be behind the ring being placed on the left hand by Christians seems a little more plausible. Early Christian marriages had a ritual to wear the wedding ring in the third finger. As the priest recited during the binding ,”In the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit”, he would take the ring and touch the thumb, the index finger, and the middle finger; then, while uttering “Amen”, he would place the ring on the ring finger, which sealed the marriage."
  • _tam_
    _tam_ Posts: 257
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    If is keeps coming up, then obviously it matters to her, on some level. And you and her are really the only two that matter in this discussion. Hence if it makes her feel better, is it that much of a problem for you.

    Personally, this is one of those things I file under; pick my battles.
    ^^^This! Each to their own...

    It wouldn't bother me. In my opinion, if a married man isn't wearing a ring on his 'ring' finger, and a woman hits on him thinking he's single, and you can't trust him to mouth the words "sorry, I'm married" that would be the issue!
  • BusyRaeNOTBusty
    BusyRaeNOTBusty Posts: 7,166 Member
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    Get the left hand ring resized to meet your wife's wishes. Keep the right hand ring on the middle the remind you of how far you've come.
  • BusyRaeNOTBusty
    BusyRaeNOTBusty Posts: 7,166 Member
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    My wedding ring story:

    One time, not long after I got married I jammed the crap out of my ring finger playing rugby. I waited a good 6 months for it to return to normal size, couldn't wear my ring. Went to a rugby tournament, some guy asked me if I was married (after he asked if I liked boys or girls, standard question for a female rugby player) and then he jokingly accused me of leaving my ring at home so I could hook up on tournament (also standard rugby practice), so I got my ring resized. THEN my finger magically shrunk back down and I had to start wearing my ring on my middle finger until once again getting it resized. The end.

    Also, our 3 year old flushed my husband's down the toilet. And gold is freaking expensive these days. His originally $300 ring would be $600 to replace. He got a cheapy titanium one for $90.
  • readysetgo69
    readysetgo69 Posts: 28
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    resize it before it is on another mans hand....
  • Iwishyouwell
    Iwishyouwell Posts: 1,888 Member
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    Good grief, all this "right finger" vs "wrong finger" talk.

    If folks marriages end up running into trouble over jewelry, you've got much bigger problems.
  • DeltaZero
    DeltaZero Posts: 1,197 Member
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    "debate"


    lol
  • MassiveDelta
    MassiveDelta Posts: 3,311 Member
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    resize it before it is on another mans hand....
    If she is that easily put off let her go.


    As for a happy wife happy life...If she was any kind of wife at all she would support her husband. she knows he is still wearing the ring and if she doesn't trust him then that's a bigger issue.
  • rosemary98
    rosemary98 Posts: 632
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    my husband never wore his ring in his previous marriage (says he lost it...and it irritated his finger). I didn't fight him on it. I actually don't have a wedding band...just my engagement ring that cost more than anyone should pay for a ring. we are perpetually engaged, I guess. It really doesn't matter to me at all (but I do like my ring). : )
  • jeffd247
    jeffd247 Posts: 319 Member
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    Is it a wedding ring or a "I just lost weight ring"?

    If it's a wedding ring, and your wife wants you to wear it on the finger she put it on when you two got married, then just do that.


    If you were here I'd give you a bro-slap upside the head for being a dum-dum.


    Fix it!
  • pawoodhull
    pawoodhull Posts: 1,759 Member
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    My wedding rings stopped fitting after I lost 100 pounds (very wide band, so it could be worn longer). I had my anniversary band sized down in anticipation of the wedding rings not fitting after awhile. Well now the anniversary band doesn't fit either, so I bought a $25 stainless steel band that does fit and is wide enough that it will probably fit until I hit goal and get my wedding rings sized. I didn't wait for my husband to say something about me not having a ring on, I just delt with it. It's a respect thing. I understnad not wanting to get your wedding ring sized and resized as you go down, but you are a married man and your wife wants a ring on your hand, so get another or get it sized.

    Question. How would you feel if the situation were reversed and she wasn't wearing hers anymore?
  • 1longroad
    1longroad Posts: 642 Member
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    I wear 2 rings; a standard wedding ring on my left hand, and a claddagh on my right. For a couple years, I wore neither, because they didn't fit. Well, I lost enough weight to start wearing them again, but then something happened; I kept losing weight and now they are too big. They were spinning around, falling off - I've had to fish 'em out of the disposal, trash at work, etc ..

    Well here's the debate. To solve this issue, I started wearing them on my middle fingers instead of my ring fingers. My wife however, is insisting that I get them resized so that I can wear them on the correct fingers, but I've decided I kind of like them on the "wrong" fingers. (I have to say I kind of like the .. "Hey, what's up with the rings?" .. well, I used to weigh over 300 .. "nooo ****. wow.") This debate has not gotten heated, nor do I think it will .. it just exists, and comes up from time to time.

    So anyway I figured I would post the question here because MFP'ers tend to be quiet and reserved in their opinions, and will treat me gently, with dignity and respect.

    Does it REALLY matter which finger you wear the ring on?

    Honestly, I think since it bothers your wife, I would get the wedding band resized to the correct finger/ As for the claddagh ring, I would wear it long and proud on my middle finger to remind myself where I had been and how far I had come!!! Congratulations on your accomplishment!!!!
  • AngelicxAnnihilation
    AngelicxAnnihilation Posts: 336 Member
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    my engagement ring is important to my fiancé because he put it there.. It's starting to become loose and when it starts falling off I'm going to put it on a chain and wear it as a necklace until I finish losing all the weight I want. Then I'm getting them resized.. Maybe you can talk to your wife and wear them on the wrong fingers until you decide your finished losing weight. Then decide together what you want to do from there.
  • MireyGal76
    MireyGal76 Posts: 7,334 Member
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    maybe it's easier to just gain back the weight.
  • TallGlassOfQuirky
    TallGlassOfQuirky Posts: 282 Member
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    women only like men in tight Tshirts and shades and skinnyjeans.

    There are women in the world who like men in skinny jeans???
    Skinny jeans, or, as my boyfriend (he of the massively muscular thighs) calls them, "skipped leg day pants."
  • TallGlassOfQuirky
    TallGlassOfQuirky Posts: 282 Member
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    I went from a 9-1/2 to a 5 when I was with my ex husband and I had a "loaner" ring from a family member when the original didn't stay on (I couldn't have even worn it on my thumb). It was important to my ex husband so I wore a ring. It wasn't about me or my bragging rights.
    Granted, I am not a big jewelry person so if it hadn't mattered to him I probably wouldn't have worried about it.
    It sounds like it matters to your wife and that is why it should matter to you
  • TheEffort
    TheEffort Posts: 1,028 Member
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    maybe it's easier to just gain back the weight.

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