What's going on with the MFP bad attitudes? :(

ItsAliciaMarie

So I have been on and off of this site for a few years now. Just started my 3rd round, and I'm determined to accomplish my goals this time! But with the huge growth of this site, I have also noticed some changes.

Has anyone else noticed that the "attitude" of MFP seems to not be as it was before? It gets more and more hostile each time I read post. Don't get me wrong, all of my friends are GREAT - they always have awesome posts on my feed that I can get inspiration from. I'm talking about the message boards, specifically the "Motivation and Support" category.

I read posts from people who are reaching out for help (on whatever subject it may be) by posting on the message boards. What they get in return is people making fun of grammar, spelling, usage, or giving sarcastic remarks back. This is not a rare occasion, either. I'd say it's what happens the majority of the time. It really hurts my heart to see those people, who may not have the same education as everyone else, get shot down over minor details. People seem to have lost sight of what this website is for. We are all here for the same reason - to get/stay healthy.

I posted on the motivation and support category during the last time I tried to lose weight (my 2nd attempt) and decided quickly that I will no longer ask for help on message boards. It was a post about my unsupportive boyfriend, and I admit, it was "ranty." But almost all of the responses that I received were rude, judgmental, or sarcastic.

It's too bad that we all have to say hurtful or mean things to each other when this is such a wonderful site that can be so helpful to people. Until I see I change, I think I'll stick to posting questions on my status or use Google.

*End Rant*

tammycolbert

I couldn't agree with you more!! This is the first time in a long time I've posted because of such situations. I understand this is a public board, anyone and everyone could be on here, but still, some of the comments are from seasoned veterans, who have accomplished the goal they were out to set, or almost there and that is very hurtful. Maybe that is how they are in real life, maybe it is a front for all the hurt they may have had during the hard times in life.

Whatever the cases might be. I wish all those luck in the journey they have set out for and maybe one day the board which is supposed to support will be only that, support.

chocorunner122

Yes I so agree!!!! This is my third round of trying too so many people on here act like they know everything about health and fitness and so they go around making everyone feel stupid when we ask questions. I rarely will post anything now on the boards because when've I do, all I do is get criticized instead of getting help.

ceebeez1975

I agree when I came on here 3 years ago it was very positive now there are lots of sarcastic nasty comments! We should be supporting not making rude or judgemental comments

egrusy

I posted on the motivation and support category during the last time I tried to lose weight (my 2nd attempt) and decided quickly that I will no longer ask for help on message boards. It was a post about my unsupportive boyfriend, and I admit, it was "ranty." But almost all of the responses that I received were rude, judgmental, or sarcastic.

Are you talking about your "Ok, I'm a big baby" post? If so, you might want to go back and read it again; I found only a couple of responses I considered a bit rude :flowerforyou:

The Internet is wide open to all types of people. Also, it's easy to misunderstand a response on a forum like this because there is no tone, no facial expression, no inflection, to help understand where a person is really coming from. I agree that there are sometimes some clearly rude, judgmental, or sarcastic responses, but IMO the vast majority on here are helpful and well-meaning.

Best of luck to you on your journey hon!

Llorry

I agree with you! It is very sad when people are crucified for simple things. I know that I tend to write in stream of thought as if I was talking and often times do not pay attention to grammar.
I am also a typo queen

socajam

So I have been on and off of this site for a few years now. Just started my 3rd round, and I'm determined to accomplish my goals this time! But with the huge growth of this site, I have also noticed some changes.

Has anyone else noticed that the "attitude" of MFP seems to not be as it was before? It gets more and more hostile each time I read post. Don't get me wrong, all of my friends are GREAT - they always have awesome posts on my feed that I can get inspiration from. I'm talking about the message boards, specifically the "Motivation and Support" category.

I read posts from people who are reaching out for help (on whatever subject it may be) by posting on the message boards. What they get in return is people making fun of grammar, spelling, usage, or giving sarcastic remarks back. This is not a rare occasion, either. I'd say it's what happens the majority of the time. It really hurts my heart to see those people, who may not have the same education as everyone else, get shot down over minor details. People seem to have lost sight of what this website is for. We are all here for the same reason - to get/stay healthy.

I posted on the motivation and support category during the last time I tried to lose weight (my 2nd attempt) and decided quickly that I will no longer ask for help on message boards. It was a post about my unsupportive boyfriend, and I admit, it was "ranty." But almost all of the responses that I received were rude, judgmental, or sarcastic.

It's too bad that we all have to say hurtful or mean things to each other when this is such a wonderful site that can be so helpful to people. Until I see I change, I think I'll stick to posting questions on my status or use Google.

*End Rant*

This is not a baby sitting service, if you post something that does not make one ounce of sense, people and myself included are not going to lay down and play dead.

ItsAliciaMarie

So I have been on and off of this site for a few years now. Just started my 3rd round, and I'm determined to accomplish my goals this time! But with the huge growth of this site, I have also noticed some changes.

Has anyone else noticed that the "attitude" of MFP seems to not be as it was before? It gets more and more hostile each time I read post. Don't get me wrong, all of my friends are GREAT - they always have awesome posts on my feed that I can get inspiration from. I'm talking about the message boards, specifically the "Motivation and Support" category.

I read posts from people who are reaching out for help (on whatever subject it may be) by posting on the message boards. What they get in return is people making fun of grammar, spelling, usage, or giving sarcastic remarks back. This is not a rare occasion, either. I'd say it's what happens the majority of the time. It really hurts my heart to see those people, who may not have the same education as everyone else, get shot down over minor details. People seem to have lost sight of what this website is for. We are all here for the same reason - to get/stay healthy.

I posted on the motivation and support category during the last time I tried to lose weight (my 2nd attempt) and decided quickly that I will no longer ask for help on message boards. It was a post about my unsupportive boyfriend, and I admit, it was "ranty." But almost all of the responses that I received were rude, judgmental, or sarcastic.

It's too bad that we all have to say hurtful or mean things to each other when this is such a wonderful site that can be so helpful to people. Until I see I change, I think I'll stick to posting questions on my status or use Google.

*End Rant*

This is not a baby sitting service, if you post something that does not make one ounce of sense, people and myself included are not going to lay down and play dead.

I don't understand why you would would need to say anything mean or hurtful in response to not understanding. If you don't understand, move to the next post, or ask probing questions to understand what the person's question is. I get it's not a babysitting service, but it's also on a site for support.

jazi719

Lots and lots of sarcasm on here and not funny sarcasm. I have noticed it and I've only been on here one month. IMO, people who are mean must be miserable with themselves on the inside.

You're not funny, you're just plain mean. Karma can be a b**ch, watch out

zjpq

agreed

jazi719

This is not a baby sitting service, if you post something that does not make one ounce of sense, people and myself included are not going to lay down and play dead.

Seriously?? I think you need some babysitting.

thunderstruck134

OP, I think they might just be hangry. :laugh:

ItsAliciaMarie

OP, I think they might just be hangry. :laugh:

Haha! "Grab a snickers - you're not you when you're hungry!!!" :laugh:

socajam

So I have been on and off of this site for a few years now. Just started my 3rd round, and I'm determined to accomplish my goals this time! But with the huge growth of this site, I have also noticed some changes.

Has anyone else noticed that the "attitude" of MFP seems to not be as it was before? It gets more and more hostile each time I read post. Don't get me wrong, all of my friends are GREAT - they always have awesome posts on my feed that I can get inspiration from. I'm talking about the message boards, specifically the "Motivation and Support" category.

I read posts from people who are reaching out for help (on whatever subject it may be) by posting on the message boards. What they get in return is people making fun of grammar, spelling, usage, or giving sarcastic remarks back. This is not a rare occasion, either. I'd say it's what happens the majority of the time. It really hurts my heart to see those people, who may not have the same education as everyone else, get shot down over minor details. People seem to have lost sight of what this website is for. We are all here for the same reason - to get/stay healthy.

I posted on the motivation and support category during the last time I tried to lose weight (my 2nd attempt) and decided quickly that I will no longer ask for help on message boards. It was a post about my unsupportive boyfriend, and I admit, it was "ranty." But almost all of the responses that I received were rude, judgmental, or sarcastic.

It's too bad that we all have to say hurtful or mean things to each other when this is such a wonderful site that can be so helpful to people. Until I see I change, I think I'll stick to posting questions on my status or use Google.

*End Rant*

This is not a baby sitting service, if you post something that does not make one ounce of sense, people and myself included are not going to lay down and play dead.

I don't understand why you would would need to say anything mean or hurtful in response to not understanding. If you don't understand, move to the next post, or ask probing questions to understand what the person's question is. I get it's not a babysitting service, but it's also on a site for support.

People need to grow an extra skin. If what I said is hurtful to the thin skinned people, then the Internet is definitely not for them.

socajam

This is not a baby sitting service, if you post something that does not make one ounce of sense, people and myself included are not going to lay down and play dead.

Seriously?? I think you need some babysitting.

Definitely, not, because I do not take offense to what is said. I realize that this is the Internet and people have opinions which are not similar to mine, and do not get hurt by their opinions. In fact I welcome other opinions, and use it as a learning tool.

If you are hurt by comments, grow an extra skin, because things are not going to change on the Internet.

missigus

Yep, I never post questions to the general population on here any more. There are lots and lots of snarky and condescending people that seem to think they are the only one that know "the way". What I hate are the ones who have been blessed with good genes, or are young and never had to struggle with a slowing metabolism, or health/physical issues, but yet feel they are the guru's of it all and then cut others down because they ought to be so lucky. It's a fact, that some of us have to work really hard at this and it takes time to figure it out as you go. We all are not perfect, if we were, then there would be no reason for this site at all. If you've earned it or really work for those glorious bods some of you have, then speak by all means, but no need to be snarky and sarcastic making people feel bad.

MrGonzo05

I think I'll stick to posting questions on my status or use Google.

*End Rant*

You're one post late.

ThriceBlessed

I've reached the same conclusion. Occasionally I'll go to the message boards to offer a supporting word for someone, and have even gotten flack for that.

I've stopped asking my own questions.

ItsAliciaMarie

I think I'll stick to posting questions on my status or use Google.

*End Rant*

You're one post late.

Touche. :smokin:

missigus

This is not a baby sitting service, if you post something that does not make one ounce of sense, people and myself included are not going to lay down and play dead.

Seriously?? I think you need some babysitting.

Definitely, not, because I do not take offense to what is said. I realize that this is the Internet and people have opinions which are not similar to mine, and do not get hurt by their opinions. In fact I welcome other opinions, and use it as a learning tool.

If you are hurt by comments, grow an extra skin, because things are not going to change on the Internet.

Really? who died and gave you the right to tell me and everyone else to grow a thicker skin? You have no right to tell anyone that just so you can defend your insensitive nature. Good for you that it doesn't bother you, however some of us still have feelings. But, that's just my opinion.

la8ydi

I posted something a few weeks ago about how I was having trouble getting dates - the responses I got were SO hurtful. I was told I was too old and guys my age don't want old women - was told to get a cat (or two) - was told that men don't want flabby, unattractive women - was told to cut my hair, color my hair, get contacts vs. glasses, and wear different clothing. I felt even worse about myself then before I had posted. I think you're right - there are a lot of supportive people, but there are also a lot of people who enjoy being mean and nasty just for sport.

iatemyelf

If you are hurt by comments, grow an extra skin, because things are not going to change on the Internet.

what's this? i don't even...

wow. there's always going to be complete jerks in life, does that mean we should ALL walk around like and insult/beat/kill/rape whomever we want? yeah, no thanks. there's plenty of room for civility in the real world and on the internet.

what a great reason to be a jerk or do things that disparage people... "not going to change"! were you against the civil rights movement, too? do you think women shouldn't vote? do you think we should still have slaves? hate to brake it to you, but things change... ALL THE TIME. this should be obvious.

if you'd rather be a jerk than show a little civility, don't hide behind your BS reasoning that it's just the internet way of doing things and admit you're just an *kitten*.

MysteriousMerlin

My best advice, ignore it. There are always going to be people who need to make themselves feel better by putting others down. Using "it's the internet, get off , lolz" is a weak excuse to insult those asking legitimate questions. If someone is leading an unhealthy lifestyle or trying a dangerous diet, it's not helpful to tear them down about it. Give them an alternative. I know myself if someone insults me while giving advice, I know exactly who's advice I'm NOT going to follow. It's doing more harm than good.

tigerblood78

This is not a baby sitting service, if you post something that does not make one ounce of sense, people and myself included are not going to lay down and play dead.

way to pick your battles there mighty Internet warrior

Unknown

This content has been removed.

golfmonk

So I have been on and off of this site for a few years now. Just started my 3rd round, and I'm determined to accomplish my goals this time! But with the huge growth of this site, I have also noticed some changes.

Has anyone else noticed that the "attitude" of MFP seems to not be as it was before? It gets more and more hostile each time I read post. Don't get me wrong, all of my friends are GREAT - they always have awesome posts on my feed that I can get inspiration from. I'm talking about the message boards, specifically the "Motivation and Support" category.

I read posts from people who are reaching out for help (on whatever subject it may be) by posting on the message boards. What they get in return is people making fun of grammar, spelling, usage, or giving sarcastic remarks back. This is not a rare occasion, either. I'd say it's what happens the majority of the time. It really hurts my heart to see those people, who may not have the same education as everyone else, get shot down over minor details. People seem to have lost sight of what this website is for. We are all here for the same reason - to get/stay healthy.

I posted on the motivation and support category during the last time I tried to lose weight (my 2nd attempt) and decided quickly that I will no longer ask for help on message boards. It was a post about my unsupportive boyfriend, and I admit, it was "ranty." But almost all of the responses that I received were rude, judgmental, or sarcastic.

It's too bad that we all have to say hurtful or mean things to each other when this is such a wonderful site that can be so helpful to people. Until I see I change, I think I'll stick to posting questions on my status or use Google.

*End Rant*

This is not a baby sitting service, if you post something that does not make one ounce of sense, people and myself included are not going to lay down and play dead.

I don't understand why you would would need to say anything mean or hurtful in response to not understanding. If you don't understand, move to the next post, or ask probing questions to understand what the person's question is. I get it's not a babysitting service, but it's also on a site for support.

Yep, just ignore people like this; they are not worth the effort. And for the record OP, I totally agree with your post!

Sassyallday

Posting anything on the internet in a space where anyone can respond is casting a wide net. And just like in fishing, you sometimes pull up garbage.

guroprincess

If you are hurt by comments, grow an extra skin, because things are not going to change on the Internet.

what's this? i don't even...

wow. there's always going to be complete jerks in life, does that mean we should ALL walk around like and insult/beat/kill/rape whomever we want? yeah, no thanks. there's plenty of room for civility in the real world and on the internet.

what a great reason to be a jerk or do things that disparage people... "not going to change"! were you against the civil rights movement, too? do you think women shouldn't vote? do you think we should still have slaves? hate to brake it to you, but things change... ALL THE TIME. this should be obvious.

if you'd rather be a jerk than show a little civility, don't hide behind your BS reasoning that it's just the internet way of doing things and admit you're just an *kitten*.

Comparing sarcasm on the internet to:
1) Beating
2) Raping
3) Killing
4) Slavery

Yeah, this is going to end well.

iatemyelf

If you are hurt by comments, grow an extra skin, because things are not going to change on the Internet.

what's this? i don't even...

wow. there's always going to be complete jerks in life, does that mean we should ALL walk around like and insult/beat/kill/rape whomever we want? yeah, no thanks. there's plenty of room for civility in the real world and on the internet.

what a great reason to be a jerk or do things that disparage people... "not going to change"! were you against the civil rights movement, too? do you think women shouldn't vote? do you think we should still have slaves? hate to brake it to you, but things change... ALL THE TIME. this should be obvious.

if you'd rather be a jerk than show a little civility, don't hide behind your BS reasoning that it's just the internet way of doing things and admit you're just an *kitten*.

Comparing sarcasm on the internet to:
1) Beating
2) Raping
3) Killing
4) Slavery

Yeah, this is going to end well.

whooooooooshshhhhhh, right over your head.

guroprincess

If you are hurt by comments, grow an extra skin, because things are not going to change on the Internet.

what's this? i don't even...

wow. there's always going to be complete jerks in life, does that mean we should ALL walk around like and insult/beat/kill/rape whomever we want? yeah, no thanks. there's plenty of room for civility in the real world and on the internet.

what a great reason to be a jerk or do things that disparage people... "not going to change"! were you against the civil rights movement, too? do you think women shouldn't vote? do you think we should still have slaves? hate to brake it to you, but things change... ALL THE TIME. this should be obvious.

if you'd rather be a jerk than show a little civility, don't hide behind your BS reasoning that it's just the internet way of doing things and admit you're just an *kitten*.

Comparing sarcasm on the internet to:
1) Beating
2) Raping
3) Killing
4) Slavery

Yeah, this is going to end well.

whooooooooshshhhhhh, right over your head.

Because making light of/being sarcastic about those issues is *so much* better.

binariiangel

I most definitely agree it is sad to see how people treat each other anymore. This is supposed to be a place for help & support, not mockery & shaming. I mean there are a lot of posts on here that i don't agree with, but I just rant in my head and then move on. For example one of the was complaining about how one of their friends was going to become a gourmet pastry chef, and was just fueling the fire for the obesity epidemic. People need good tasting things to eat, and the chances are with them being GOURMET they're A.) Going to be really expensive, and B.) A once in a while treat.
As for the for boyfriend rant, it can sometimes be overwhelming dealing with them on your own, and you don't always have that sounding boarding in real life to bounce ideas/rants off of. So I don't blame you for posting the rant, I sometimes want to as well. It also seems to be an epidemic of trolling all over the internet not just MFP but other sites as well such as my IRC Network, and Facebook. But it's not just you. Also if anyone needs/wants new friends that feel the same way as them about the trolling and the rudeness feel free to add me!