Work birthday - I'm a jerk for not eating pizza and cake

1356

Replies

  • elleloch
    elleloch Posts: 739 Member
    Boy, that escalated quickly

    Yeah. Brick killed a guy!
  • THECaptainObvious
    THECaptainObvious Posts: 399 Member
    THAT is what is wrong with America and part of the Obesity problem. Join in "Because"
    How DARE you eat healthy. Basically that is their problem because deep down they know YOU are right to eat better, but they are justifying their own feelings.

    HIGH FIVE for sticking to your meal!!!!!!!!

    Sorry it makes you feel bad though !

    Yeah! Don't let the jealous haters get you down!


    Another thing you could do is go ahead and accept a slice of pizza. And then act like you're going to take a bite and throw it as hard as you can against the wall. Then glare at everyone and say "THAT'S WHAT I THINK OF YOUR DEVIL FOOD!! BURN!! ALL OF YOU!!! BUUUUURRRRRRNNNNN!!!!!!"

    And slowly back out of the room making squinty eye contact with each person.

    Agreed!!! And make your eye twitch alittle as you back away!!!
  • BrainyBurro
    BrainyBurro Posts: 6,129 Member
    Not my birthday, my boss's.

    Why can't "no thank you" be enough? Twelve people in the room want to stand and discuss why the girl who brings healthy lunch every day doesn't want pizza and ice cream. It's embarrassing.

    I've clearly lost a lot of weight over the last four months. About 20 lbs. Many people have commented. Why is it so crazy that I don't want pizza?

    Because if you dont act like everyone else you are clearly against them. I used to have the same problem until I actually started acting like a 'Richard' they accused me of being. Right after that, they stopped asking me to eat their devil foodz!

    The best part is, after their attempt to sabotage you fails soon you will see 1/2 of them starting to bring in or stock the company fridge with the same things you are eating in their attempt to become more like you (which is what they really wished in the first place).

    I don't understand the first part of your comment. By Richard, do you mean Richard III? So you started locking their children in a tower and killing them?

    ...so sad. he only wanted a horse. :huh:
  • redheaddee
    redheaddee Posts: 2,005 Member
    Why can't "no thank you" be enough? Twelve people in the room want to stand and discuss why the girl who brings healthy lunch every day doesn't want pizza and ice cream. It's embarrassing.

    Because some people are just nosey nellies. Don't feed the drama monster. Keep it simple and polite, and move on. Eventually they will get bored and move on too.
  • KANGOOJUMPS
    KANGOOJUMPS Posts: 6,474 Member
    i will eat your pizza and cake,
    then add some booze to it too,
  • ScottF83
    ScottF83 Posts: 233 Member
    Boy, that escalated quickly

    Yeah. Brick killed a guy!

    and-brick-killed-a-guy_o_585528.jpg
  • skullshank
    skullshank Posts: 4,323 Member
    They probably all talked about you after you left the room, too. They were probably discussing how you think you're better than everyone else, but it was really because they are jealous because you are the only one with any willpower.

    How can you even work there now? You should quit. Not officially, though. Just stop going. That'll make them think.

    this.

    there's no going back now.

    maybe send them a farewell cake.
  • Contrarian
    Contrarian Posts: 8,138 Member
    They probably all talked about you after you left the room, too. They were probably discussing how you think you're better than everyone else, but it was really because they are jealous because you are the only one with any willpower.

    How can you even work there now? You should quit. Not officially, though. Just stop going. That'll make them think.

    this.

    there's no going back now.

    maybe send them a farewell cake.

    The cake should have fat people made of icing on it, and you should have the bakery write "This is you" with arrows pointing to the fat icing people.
  • pseudomuffin
    pseudomuffin Posts: 1,058 Member
    Ah yes the magic of being lactose intolerant... People without food allergies don't really understand that I'm not being rude refusing chocolate chip cookies, pizza, yogurt smoothies, ice cream, etc., I just really don't want to spend hours on the toilet with my face in the wastebasket. Even if it tastes good going down, I can assure you coming up it is awful, and gastrointestinal distress makes me want to die.
  • Laura3BB
    Laura3BB Posts: 250 Member
    This thread is funny :-)

    I think we are all confronted with this type of situation at work.
    Personally, I take some of the cake or whatever is going around, if I really have to because everyone is looking.
    Then I let it sit in my plate a while...
    then throw it away or put it down in a corner discreetly.
    That way, noone comments.
  • redheaddee
    redheaddee Posts: 2,005 Member
    Offices are weird places. If you 'eat healthy' and skip the pizza and cake, you are a health nut that never treats themselves and looks down on those that do. If you indulge, you would probably get the same type of crap, only in reverse. "Oh, I can't believe you are eating pizza and cake. I thought you ate healthy".


    So.Much.Truth. :flowerforyou:
  • da_bears10089
    da_bears10089 Posts: 1,791 Member
    They probably all talked about you after you left the room, too. They were probably discussing how you think you're better than everyone else, but it was really because they are jealous because you are the only one with any willpower.

    How can you even work there now? You should quit. Not officially, though. Just stop going. That'll make them think.

    this.

    there's no going back now.

    maybe send them a farewell cake.

    The cake should have fat people made of icing on it, and you should have the bakery write "This is you" with arrows pointing to the fat icing people.

    and it should be made to look similar to "hell" because they are eating devil foodz...
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
    What kind of cake was it?

    *Evil Maniacal Laugh* We really are here for the same things, I guess.
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
    Not my birthday, my boss's.

    Why can't "no thank you" be enough? Twelve people in the room want to stand and discuss why the girl who brings healthy lunch every day doesn't want pizza and ice cream. It's embarrassing.

    I've clearly lost a lot of weight over the last four months. About 20 lbs. Many people have commented. Why is it so crazy that I don't want pizza?

    Because if you dont act like everyone else you are clearly against them. I used to have the same problem until I actually started acting like a 'Richard' they accused me of being. Right after that, they stopped asking me to eat their devil foodz!

    The best part is, after their attempt to sabotage you fails soon you will see 1/2 of them starting to bring in or stock the company fridge with the same things you are eating in their attempt to become more like you (which is what they really wished in the first place).

    A bit long winded but...."jealous" answer if I ever saw one.
  • DamePiglet
    DamePiglet Posts: 3,730 Member
    Since I have very little dignity, I usually say, "OH! YOU DON'T WANT ME TO EAT THAT! YOU WON'T WANT TO WALK IN *THAT* VAPOR TRAIL!"
    Haven't had a problem since.





    Naw, I'm lying, but it sounded good!
  • brower47
    brower47 Posts: 16,356 Member
    THAT is what is wrong with America and part of the Obesity problem. Join in "Because"
    How DARE you eat healthy. Basically that is their problem because deep down they know YOU are right to eat better, but they are justifying their own feelings.

    HIGH FIVE for sticking to your meal!!!!!!!!

    Sorry it makes you feel bad though !

    Really, THAT is what is wrong with America? Out of the thousands upon thousands of possible problems it faces, THAT is what is wrong? Really?
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
    look, it's really simple OP... the next time some co-worker offers you cake, just say, "i'll eat your cake, but only if you pay me $50". they'll laugh. you'll laugh. then they'll say, "are you serious?". you say, "yes. deadly serious". they'll walk away with their cake.

    pretty soon, your co-workers will start to avoid you.

    then, they'll start talking about you behind your back.

    next, you'll start getting blamed when things go wrong.

    eventually, you'll start getting poor performance reviews with "does not get along with co-workers" highlighted for easy HR reference.

    finally, you'll be terminated...

    ...and you'll never have to worry about those co-workers offering you food ever again.

    problem solved forever.

    OR they'll give her the $50 and stand in a circle takign bets while she eats the cake. ANd she'll walk away with a belly full of cake and $50 richer. Man, I want to go get a job now. THis is sounding fun, filling, and lucrative.
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
    THAT is what is wrong with America and part of the Obesity problem. Join in "Because"
    How DARE you eat healthy. Basically that is their problem because deep down they know YOU are right to eat better, but they are justifying their own feelings.

    HIGH FIVE for sticking to your meal!!!!!!!!

    Sorry it makes you feel bad though !

    Really, THAT is what is wrong with America? Out of the thousands upon thousands of possible problems it faces, THAT is what is wrong? Really?

    I know, you though it was the deficit, or the insurance right? WRONG! It's the jealous haterz and the food at work culture.
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
    THAT is what is wrong with America and part of the Obesity problem. Join in "Because"
    How DARE you eat healthy. Basically that is their problem because deep down they know YOU are right to eat better, but they are justifying their own feelings.

    HIGH FIVE for sticking to your meal!!!!!!!!

    Sorry it makes you feel bad though !

    Yeah! Don't let the jealous haters get you down!


    Another thing you could do is go ahead and accept a slice of pizza. And then act like you're going to take a bite and throw it as hard as you can against the wall. Then glare at everyone and say "THAT'S WHAT I THINK OF YOUR DEVIL FOOD!! BURN!! ALL OF YOU!!! BUUUUURRRRRRNNNNN!!!!!!"

    And slowly back out of the room making squinty eye contact with each person.

    Agreed!!! And make your eye twitch alittle as you back away!!!

    and then stop halfway to your desk and lie down in the fetal position.
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
    They probably all talked about you after you left the room, too. They were probably discussing how you think you're better than everyone else, but it was really because they are jealous because you are the only one with any willpower.

    How can you even work there now? You should quit. Not officially, though. Just stop going. That'll make them think.

    this.

    there's no going back now.

    maybe send them a farewell cake.

    The cake should have fat people made of icing on it, and you should have the bakery write "This is you" with arrows pointing to the fat icing people.

    ROTFL!!!!!
  • brower47
    brower47 Posts: 16,356 Member
    THAT is what is wrong with America and part of the Obesity problem. Join in "Because"
    How DARE you eat healthy. Basically that is their problem because deep down they know YOU are right to eat better, but they are justifying their own feelings.

    HIGH FIVE for sticking to your meal!!!!!!!!

    Sorry it makes you feel bad though !

    Really, THAT is what is wrong with America? Out of the thousands upon thousands of possible problems it faces, THAT is what is wrong? Really?

    I know, you though it was the deficit, or the insurance right? WRONG! It's the jealous haterz and the food at work culture.

    I've been wrong before. I guess I had no idea how bad it was out there with all the insidious food giving in office culture. Thanks for setting me straight.
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
    THAT is what is wrong with America and part of the Obesity problem. Join in "Because"
    How DARE you eat healthy. Basically that is their problem because deep down they know YOU are right to eat better, but they are justifying their own feelings.

    HIGH FIVE for sticking to your meal!!!!!!!!

    Sorry it makes you feel bad though !

    Really, THAT is what is wrong with America? Out of the thousands upon thousands of possible problems it faces, THAT is what is wrong? Really?

    I know, you though it was the deficit, or the insurance right? WRONG! It's the jealous haterz and the food at work culture.

    I've been wrong before. I guess I had no idea how bad it was out there with all the insidious food giving in office culture. Thanks for setting me straight.

    ur welcome. i know. because i used to work. it's okay. live and learn. :flowerforyou:
  • bcattoes
    bcattoes Posts: 17,299 Member
    Since I have very little dignity, I usually say, "OH! YOU DON'T WANT ME TO EAT THAT! YOU WON'T WANT TO WALK IN *THAT* VAPOR TRAIL!"
    Haven't had a problem since.





    Naw, I'm lying, but it sounded good!

    :laugh:
  • lizzyclatworthy
    lizzyclatworthy Posts: 296 Member
    I do so love not going to work anymore!
    People do the same about alcohol... I will either tell people I am a recovering alcoholic or I don't drink for religious reasons.
    I just don't think it's worth the calories or being too hungover to work out the next day!
  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
    I'd lie tell 'em the sauce in pizza gives you explosive diarrhea the more graphic the better.
  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
    Since I have very little dignity, I usually say, "OH! YOU DON'T WANT ME TO EAT THAT! YOU WON'T WANT TO WALK IN *THAT* VAPOR TRAIL!"
    Haven't had a problem since.





    Naw, I'm lying, but it sounded good!

    lol good thought
  • NerdyTXChick
    NerdyTXChick Posts: 155 Member
    I think there's a big difference between a person who politely offers you food or inquires about your diet, and a person who says, "So I guess that makes us all pigs?" If someone says something that rude, they've taken the conversation to something other than a polite exchange between colleagues, and should be treated as such. I get the impression this has little to do with food, and more to do with an office bully.

    Edited to add: we recently had a pizza party where I work. I told them I'd been overindulging too much lately and didn't want any. They replied, "Oh, okay" and I never heard another word about it.
  • seonf
    seonf Posts: 24 Member
    Who cares what other people think, what matters is you are eating healthy and what matters is what YOU think of yourself. So congratulations, work place morning teas and lunches are a huge temptation. Besides, what kind of a colleague doesn’t check your dietary requirements first?
  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
    Sometimes co-workers suck. And I think it's rude only to order pizza for a party without asking if everyone is ok with it, and not even have a fruit or veggie tray or something... You didn't do anything wrong.
  • DamePiglet
    DamePiglet Posts: 3,730 Member
    Since I have very little dignity, I usually say, "OH! YOU DON'T WANT ME TO EAT THAT! YOU WON'T WANT TO WALK IN *THAT* VAPOR TRAIL!"
    Haven't had a problem since.





    Naw, I'm lying, but it sounded good!

    lol good thought

    'cause we were thinking the same thing at the same time! HA!