Santa!?!?! I hate the lie!

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Replies

  • Chain_Ring
    Chain_Ring Posts: 753 Member
    Because kids love it. Were you scarred for life when you found out the Tooth Fairy was a big lie? ha ha
  • FatHuMan1
    FatHuMan1 Posts: 1,028 Member
    Because being a child is the closest any of us will get to unencumbered bliss. Let them enjoy it while they can, it ends all too soon.
  • Gail3260
    Gail3260 Posts: 354 Member
    My kids weren't at all disappointed when they discovered there was no Santa.

    When they knew that their presents weren't from a chap in a red suit who they'd never seen, they realised that as long as their requests weren't extravagant it was a certainty they'd get what they'd asked for.

    They were rather more bothered to discover there was no tooth fairy!
  • Beastmaster50
    Beastmaster50 Posts: 505 Member
    Why not let them enjoy the fantasy? Its fun and exciting. I personally think parents opposed to the myth are being selfish because they aren't getting the credit for gift giving.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    My parents told my brother and I at a very young age. They told us not to ruin it for our friends and classmates, but explained the real meaning of Christmas. I don't feel like I missed out on anything. We still celebrated and had traditions. I still had a fantastic imagination. I don't think there is harm in either way.
    Why can't you have both an understanding of the "true" meaning and still believe in Santa?

    You don't know if it ruined something special because you never got to experience it.
  • Santa's not real?

    Seriously...santa helps teach children about unconditional giving, and that's a good life lesson.

    I believe Santa has a naughty list.
  • bbg_daryl
    bbg_daryl Posts: 150 Member
    I told my parents when I was 4 years old that I knew Santa wasn't real. And when they asked why I didn't believe in him, I told them that it wasn't possible for one man to travel the world that quickly, while also stopping in every house to eat a snack and deliver presents. They took me out for ice cream to convince me to play along so that my older brothers wouldn't be crushed with the reality. They didn't figure out till they were closer to 10 years old.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    "DEAR EDITOR: I am 8 years old.
    "Some of my little friends say there is no Santa Claus.
    "Papa says, 'If you see it in THE SUN it's so.'
    "Please tell me the truth; is there a Santa Claus?

    "VIRGINIA O'HANLON.
    "115 WEST NINETY-FIFTH STREET."

    VIRGINIA, your little friends are wrong. They have been affected by the skepticism of a skeptical age. They do not believe except they see. They think that nothing can be which is not comprehensible by their little minds. All minds, Virginia, whether they be men's or children's, are little. In this great universe of ours man is a mere insect, an ant, in his intellect, as compared with the boundless world about him, as measured by the intelligence capable of grasping the whole of truth and knowledge.

    Yes, VIRGINIA, there is a Santa Claus. He exists as certainly as love and generosity and devotion exist, and you know that they abound and give to your life its highest beauty and joy. Alas! how dreary would be the world if there were no Santa Claus. It would be as dreary as if there were no VIRGINIAS. There would be no childlike faith then, no poetry, no romance to make tolerable this existence. We should have no enjoyment, except in sense and sight. The eternal light with which childhood fills the world would be extinguished.

    Not believe in Santa Claus! You might as well not believe in fairies! You might get your papa to hire men to watch in all the chimneys on Christmas Eve to catch Santa Claus, but even if they did not see Santa Claus coming down, what would that prove? Nobody sees Santa Claus, but that is no sign that there is no Santa Claus. The most real things in the world are those that neither children nor men can see. Did you ever see fairies dancing on the lawn? Of course not, but that's no proof that they are not there. Nobody can conceive or imagine all the wonders there are unseen and unseeable in the world.

    You may tear apart the baby's rattle and see what makes the noise inside, but there is a veil covering the unseen world which not the strongest man, nor even the united strength of all the strongest men that ever lived, could tear apart. Only faith, fancy, poetry, love, romance, can push aside that curtain and view and picture the supernal beauty and glory beyond. Is it all real? Ah, VIRGINIA, in all this world there is nothing else real and abiding.

    No Santa Claus! Thank God! he lives, and he lives forever. A thousand years from now, Virginia, nay, ten times ten thousand years from now, he will continue to make glad the heart of childhood.
  • emily356
    emily356 Posts: 318 Member
    Ok, My thoughts are not popular, but we all have to choose how to raise our children, so here it goes. I feel exactly like you do. And I have no clue what your religious beliefs are, but for us, it is the time we celebrate our savior's birth. So, We were really torn! Then one day, our oldest just straight up asked us, like yours did, if he was real, we just decided we were not gonna lie about it. We are extremely blunt and honest people to begin with, and always talk with our kids about how we will always tell them the truth, no matter what.
    I do feel like in the back of my mind, I always did remember feeling betrayed that my parents had lied to me about Santa. I am an extremely trusting person. If my parents told me something was true, then it was true, you know? So, we do not "do" Santa. I am actually buying a book at St. Nicholas to start reading to them at Christmas time. They know the story because we have told them, but St. Nicholas Day is Dec. 6th, I believe, and I would like to start incorporating that into our traditions. He was a real person and did wonderful things and showed compassion. Okay, ramble over.:smile:
  • Mischievous_Rascal
    Mischievous_Rascal Posts: 1,791 Member
    IMO, I think if you try and take away all of life's little disappointments, kids won't be able to handle the big ones later on when you're not there to protect them.

    As for Santa, I do it because I lived next door to a couple that didn't celebrate anything Christmas (they went to the graveyard and visited dead relatives on Christmas mornings) and they passed that on to their daughter. One year, when she was eight, she told me that she wished her parents believed in Santa so he would come to her house, too. She was pretty upset with her parents for what she saw as being left out of all the fun her friends were having because of them. Kids are kids, and they will believe what they want to, and if their friends believe in Santa they will, as well. Heck, my son is ten and he still believes, even though some of his friends don't! I'm lovin it!!! :)
  • Summer_Lunatic
    Summer_Lunatic Posts: 543 Member
    I believe Santa is alive in all of us and I define it as the joy you get from giving.

    And being an only child coming from parents who aren't really kid people ... let your children be kids while they still can because soon enough life happens and responsibilities become the driving force in your life.
  • Why not let them enjoy the fantasy? Its fun and exciting. I personally think parents opposed to the myth are being selfish because they aren't getting the credit for gift giving.

    I don't care what it says on the tag. This is just a silly statement. Are birthdays less fun because there a no magical present giver?
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    Tell him the truth. My mom did, and I learned to appreciate Christmas for the family time and spirit of generosity. I'm going to do the same for mine.
    This! This is what I want for my kids.
    I believed in Santa and still appreciated the family time and spirit of Christmas.

    You can have both.
  • homerjspartan
    homerjspartan Posts: 1,893 Member
    Tell him. What is the worst that could happen?


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  • redlion45
    redlion45 Posts: 155 Member
    I enjoy it. I like seeing my 4 year old get excited about the magic of Christmas. She's got the rest of her life to grow up and realize how much life can suck. I like letting my kid be a kid.

    ^^^This, so much this! I guess if it's against your religious beliefs to perpetuate Santa, then don't. Otherwise let them have the magic of Christmas for the short while they can. My kids no longer believe and there was no awful breakdown and accusations of lying. They simply grew out of it. If anything I was the sad one, not them. I still believe in the magic, just not the man and I hope my kids do too.

    Double This ^^^^^^^

    It's a harmless bit of teaching the lesson of giving through the myth. They will figure out on their own as they get older long before you tell them it's not a real person, but is only a spirit of giving / concept. They have the rest of their lives to deal with harsh reality, let them live in a fantasy world for a few years. :wink:
  • Iron_Lotus
    Iron_Lotus Posts: 2,295 Member
    Ok, My thoughts are not popular, but we all have to choose how to raise our children, so here it goes. I feel exactly like you do. And I have no clue what your religious beliefs are, but for us, it is the time we celebrate our savior's birth. So, We were really torn! Then one day, our oldest just straight up asked us, like yours did, if he was real, we just decided we were not gonna lie about it. We are extremely blunt and honest people to begin with, and always talk with our kids about how we will always tell them the truth, no matter what.
    I do feel like in the back of my mind, I always did remember feeling betrayed that my parents had lied to me about Santa. I am an extremely trusting person. If my parents told me something was true, then it was true, you know? So, we do not "do" Santa. I am actually buying a book at St. Nicholas to start reading to them at Christmas time. They know the story because we have told them, but St. Nicholas Day is Dec. 6th, I believe, and I would like to start incorporating that into our traditions. He was a real person and did wonderful things and showed compassion. Okay, ramble over.:smile:

    If you are going to celebrate the birth of our saviour you should do it on the actual day he was born in march or april (I forget the exact date now)
  • CompressedCarbon
    CompressedCarbon Posts: 357 Member
    Because children love to believe in magic and that impossible things can happen to anyone. They deserve a time of limitless imagination before the world enters and pounds it out of them. A child's imagination is a terrible thing to crush.

    My youngest daughter quit believing about aged 7 but didn't tell me til years later because she didn't want to hurt MY feelings. I think she got the message of sharing generosity because she was trying to keep the magic alive for me.
  • i don't like people (mythical or otherwise) taking credit for gifts I buy. I know, I have the real spirit of christmas in me.
  • CallMeCupcakeDammit
    CallMeCupcakeDammit Posts: 9,377 Member
    I still believe in Santa. Way to bring me down, man. Way to bring me down. :cry:
  • emily356
    emily356 Posts: 318 Member
    Why not let them enjoy the fantasy? Its fun and exciting. I personally think parents opposed to the myth are being selfish because they aren't getting the credit for gift giving.

    I don't care what it says on the tag. This is just a silly statement. Are birthdays less fun because there a no magical present giver?
    I like the way you think.
  • Kerri_is_so_very
    Kerri_is_so_very Posts: 999 Member
    You don't have to tell him "Santa isn't real", you can just say everyone has their own beliefs and in our family we celebrate by.......whatever it is you do. You can say it is a religious thing or whatever, but do not say "it is not real" to a 3 year old. as that would just invite the wrecking of santa for all young children associated with your child. It is a personal choice, just don't wreck it for others.
  • mister_universe
    mister_universe Posts: 6,664 Member
    I still believe in Santa. Way to bring me down, man. Way to bring me down. :cry:

    Hi CupcakeDammit!

    Sorry for your loss. :cry:
  • I appreciate the perspectives. I will let Santa play this year since I already for the story but will really have to think about next year and how to handle it.
  • Factory_Reset
    Factory_Reset Posts: 1,651 Member
    Sometimes being a good parent means lying to them.

    My kids still believe. I love that Christmas is magical to them. Believing in santa doesn't mean you don’t teach them the meaning of Christmas though.
  • Erin_goBrahScience
    Erin_goBrahScience Posts: 1,215 Member
    So my oldest is 3 and asked me about Santa and Christmas. I told him the basic crap that everyone spews and I hate myself for it! Wh does he need to believe in Santa just to have it crushed later in life? Why set them up for disappointment later in life. Am I a bad mom because I don't want to perpetuate this myth?

    Thoughts please.

    I actually know lots of parents who told their kids early on (from the get go). I figured it out when I saw my dad put a present under the tree I think I was maybe 4/5 (when I should have been sleeping) and then it said "From: Santa". I asked my mom and she just flat out told me. But she also told me that it wasn't nice to tell my friends, and that we should keep it between us. It never ruined anything for me.

    It did however make me feel kinda bad for a friend of mine that was 11 and STILL believed. I remember her crying at school because other kids were laughing at her.
  • emily356
    emily356 Posts: 318 Member
    Ok, My thoughts are not popular, but we all have to choose how to raise our children, so here it goes. I feel exactly like you do. And I have no clue what your religious beliefs are, but for us, it is the time we celebrate our savior's birth. So, We were really torn! Then one day, our oldest just straight up asked us, like yours did, if he was real, we just decided we were not gonna lie about it. We are extremely blunt and honest people to begin with, and always talk with our kids about how we will always tell them the truth, no matter what.
    I do feel like in the back of my mind, I always did remember feeling betrayed that my parents had lied to me about Santa. I am an extremely trusting person. If my parents told me something was true, then it was true, you know? So, we do not "do" Santa. I am actually buying a book at St. Nicholas to start reading to them at Christmas time. They know the story because we have told them, but St. Nicholas Day is Dec. 6th, I believe, and I would like to start incorporating that into our traditions. He was a real person and did wonderful things and showed compassion. Okay, ramble over.:smile:

    If you are going to celebrate the birth of our saviour you should do it on the actual day he was born in march or april (I forget the exact date now)
    I don't know the exact date, so I am fine with celebrating at the chosen time.:smile:
  • godblessourhome
    godblessourhome Posts: 3,892 Member
    We told our boys that Santa wasn't real but a game grow ups played with kids tomake the holidays more fun. It was tough when they were younger to not have them 'spill the beans' and ruin it for other kids, but I am so glad we went that route. Now that they are older, it is even more fun. Christmas has always been a wonderful holiday for us. They realize that generosity comes from actual people and is not magic.
  • tigersword
    tigersword Posts: 8,059 Member
    Ok, My thoughts are not popular, but we all have to choose how to raise our children, so here it goes. I feel exactly like you do. And I have no clue what your religious beliefs are, but for us, it is the time we celebrate our savior's birth. So, We were really torn! Then one day, our oldest just straight up asked us, like yours did, if he was real, we just decided we were not gonna lie about it. We are extremely blunt and honest people to begin with, and always talk with our kids about how we will always tell them the truth, no matter what.
    I do feel like in the back of my mind, I always did remember feeling betrayed that my parents had lied to me about Santa. I am an extremely trusting person. If my parents told me something was true, then it was true, you know? So, we do not "do" Santa. I am actually buying a book at St. Nicholas to start reading to them at Christmas time. They know the story because we have told them, but St. Nicholas Day is Dec. 6th, I believe, and I would like to start incorporating that into our traditions. He was a real person and did wonderful things and showed compassion. Okay, ramble over.:smile:
    Jesus wasn't actually born anywhere near Christmas. That's also a lie.
  • sheenarama
    sheenarama Posts: 733 Member
    Wait.... SANTA's NOT REAL!!!! :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad:
  • Squamation
    Squamation Posts: 522 Member
    I wouldn't say your a bad mom. but it does seem you're insecure about your own abilities if you blindly follow everyone else even though it's not what you believe.

    I do NOT do Santa with my boys, but unfortunately my husband does. I tell them I don't think Santa is real, but it's OK if they do. It's a teaching moment that I use to their advantage: Different people believe different things but that doesn't make them bad/weird/whatever.