Lock Up Yo Husbands!
Replies
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Who knew I could have gotten rid of my first husband so easily.0
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I was wondering why wifey locked me up in the dungeon. This explains everything!
I would come save you, but I'm sure I would just end up seducing you.0 -
Simple. Look her dead in the eye the next time she says anything or even bring it up yourself and say, "I don't want a husband. I want a sugar daddy. So unless your man is secretly rolling in gold coins and has gold bricks holding up his shelves, no worries." And walk away.
In this vein look her dead in the eye and say "No I'm aiming a little higher, I plan to be a trophy wife and I can already see how he keeps you," Then look her up and down REALLY slow. And then just stare. Make her look away first. Like a dog.
HA! That's even BETTER!
Ooh! Or
That would be mean. You are mean.
I prefer the term 'naughty'. Or evil. I'm only SLIGHTLY evil. But OP is definitely naughty tempting that neighbor and all. :smokin:
OR.......
Next time you meet for one of your short chats with her:
Gently touch the back of her with your palm and softly move your index finger across the palm of her hand; let the tip of your tongue slightly lick your upper lip and ask her if she has ever been with a ginger.
Problem solved or it could get very entertaining.
Just one old man’s opinion……
Ew! I might catch something if I touch her!0 -
hahahaha, this was an awesome read! Sorry about your bat *kitten* crazed neighbor, though!0
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women hate other women........if a woman says she doesn't have some sort of dislike of another female..then she is lying.
its a nature thing.........plenty of research has be done..lol
Except oddly enough I haven't been hated on in this thread lol. Perhaps it's just the crazy ones that hate.0 -
women hate other women........if a woman says she doesn't have some sort of dislike of another female..then she is lying.
its a nature thing.........plenty of research has be done..lol
I must be lying, because I don't hate other women. Just kidding. That's actually just insecurity and immaturity. Anyone secure and mature doesn't deal with those problems... *the more you know*0 -
You guys have it twisted, red heads are the best. Fighting mad they are sexy.
I like you. Are you married? :flowerforyou:0 -
Um.women hate other women........if a woman says she doesn't have some sort of dislike of another female..then she is lying.
its a nature thing.........plenty of research has be done..lol
No.
ETA: Very funny, OP. At least you got a good story out of it. :-)0 -
I don't wanna lock up my husband, you can have him
One of those days where I miss being single!
Or is it you're only attracted to them if the wife is the possessive type? I mean, I can pretend to be possessive long enough for you to snatch him!0 -
I don't wanna lock up my husband, you can have him One of those days where I miss being single!
Or is it you're only attracted to them if the wife is the possessive type? I mean, I can pretend to be possessive long enough for you to snatch him!
According to my neighbor, I was attracted to him before I knew she was possesive. So, I guess I will be right over. Do I need to pay a rehoming fee?0 -
so....you are not a hubby chaser ?? *Deletes FR*0
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I'm guessing SHE is sleeping with a married man who is NOT her husband so she thinks everyone else is doing it to. .
Although I can't say my ex got jealous when she was sleeping with all my friends, so maybe I'm wrong.0 -
I've recently had something similar happen... neither of us is married, but we are really great friends. We talk a lot and do things together a lot and have had the conversation. Neither of us wants anything more than friendship.
So Friday night we met to shoot pool, and he got a funny look on his face (knowing my temper).... he started by telling me, "so I just found out about an hour ago that you're having my baby..." We both laughed our a$$es off.... IMMACULATE CONCEPTION at its best!0 -
I don't wanna lock up my husband, you can have him One of those days where I miss being single!
Or is it you're only attracted to them if the wife is the possessive type? I mean, I can pretend to be possessive long enough for you to snatch him!
According to my neighbor, I was attracted to him before I knew she was possesive. So, I guess I will be right over. Do I need to pay a rehoming fee?
Nope! In fact...
edit because I can't get the pic to show up right. Was supposed to be a pic of some dude holding up a wad of cash saying "shut up and take my money!"0 -
I'm guessing SHE is sleeping with a married man who is NOT her husband so she thinks everyone else is doing it to. .
Although I can't say my ex got jealous when she was sleeping with all my friends, so maybe I'm wrong.
what good pals you had! :noway: sorry...0 -
Should have told her you already had her husband and it wasn't very good.....0
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I was good friends (still am, but we live 1,000 miles apart these days) with a guy I used to work with. He took me for a drink and dinner at a bar for my birthday one year and another coworker walked in. We were sitting at the bar, not touching, not donig googly eyes -- nothing I wouldn't do with a female friend. The other coworker stopped over to say hello and we had a nive chat.I've recently had something similar happen... neither of us is married, but we are really great friends. We talk a lot and do things together a lot and have had the conversation. Neither of us wants anything more than friendship.
So Friday night we met to shoot pool, and he got a funny look on his face (knowing my temper).... he started by telling me, "so I just found out about an hour ago that you're having my baby..." We both laughed our a$$es off.... IMMACULATE CONCEPTION at its best!
The next day, I got an email from the male friend telling me we were apparently sleeping together, according to office gossip.0 -
I've recently had something similar happen... neither of us is married, but we are really great friends. We talk a lot and do things together a lot and have had the conversation. Neither of us wants anything more than friendship.
So Friday night we met to shoot pool, and he got a funny look on his face (knowing my temper).... he started by telling me, "so I just found out about an hour ago that you're having my baby..." We both laughed our a$$es off.... IMMACULATE CONCEPTION at its best!
Wow! At least the two of you can laugh about it lol. I wonder if my neighbors husband knows I'm after him?0 -
I've recently had something similar happen... neither of us is married, but we are really great friends. We talk a lot and do things together a lot and have had the conversation. Neither of us wants anything more than friendship.
So Friday night we met to shoot pool, and he got a funny look on his face (knowing my temper).... he started by telling me, "so I just found out about an hour ago that you're having my baby..." We both laughed our a$$es off.... IMMACULATE CONCEPTION at its best!
Wow! At least the two of you can laugh about it lol. I wonder if my neighbors husband knows I'm after him?
you KNOW he does, because EVERYONE does, because you're single and horny, duh!
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I've recently had something similar happen... neither of us is married, but we are really great friends. We talk a lot and do things together a lot and have had the conversation. Neither of us wants anything more than friendship.
So Friday night we met to shoot pool, and he got a funny look on his face (knowing my temper).... he started by telling me, "so I just found out about an hour ago that you're having my baby..." We both laughed our a$$es off.... IMMACULATE CONCEPTION at its best!
Wow! At least the two of you can laugh about it lol. I wonder if my neighbors husband knows I'm after him?
you KNOW he does, because EVERYONE does, because you're single and horny, duh!
And gullible. Can't forget gullible.0 -
IN!!
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IN!!
Who knew snagging someone's husband could be as easy as starting a thread on MFP! Now I don't need to hide in the bushes! I can stay nice and cozy warm at my computer!0 -
Bwahahaha!OMG......I'm so sorry. I'll talk to my wife about that. Yes, she was on her 4th glass of Vodka/Cranberry. She gets a little crazy but, she's harmless. By the way...she'll be out of town next week if you wanna come over and hang a little while. :smokin:
oh...and one more thing. I really wish you hadn't replaced that blind in the bathroom window. I was enjoying the view0 -
IN!!
Who knew snagging someone's husband could be as easy as starting a thread on MFP! Now I don't need to hide in the bushes! I can stay nice and cozy warm at my computer!
The problem is, as soon as I saw you, I couldn't look away.
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IN!!
Who knew snagging someone's husband could be as easy as starting a thread on MFP! Now I don't need to hide in the bushes! I can stay nice and cozy warm at my computer!
The problem is, as soon as I saw you, I couldn't look away.
You're on to me!
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should've told her
"I don't want your damn man... <wink> but I'll work you over like a rented mule."0 -
should've told her
"I don't want your damn man... <wink> but I'll work you over like a rented mule."
LOL now that is what you should have said...bhwhwhaha. Although she might have taken you up on the offer, OP0 -
should've told her
"I don't want your damn man... <wink> but I'll work you over like a rented mule."
LOL now that is what you should have said...bhwhwhaha. Although she might have taken you up on the offer, OP
I wonder if they've ever considered a 3some? I can supply the gag 0 -
Thanks for the laugh. Though sometimes this stuff isn't so funny. I work in EMS; long, sometimes intense, hours. Mostly male colleagues. (Firefighters, LEOs and Paramedics) I would consider some of these guys "besties." Who better to understand some of the things we deal with? To them, I am just "one of the guys." Unfortunately, to many of the women in their lives, I am the "homewrecker trying to steal their man away." Honestly, I spend enough time with these guys. I surely have NO intention or desire to take them away from their families, but man, how the stories fly! God forbid I join my crewmates for a drink or anything after a shift to "decompress." And now that it's holiday party season, I guess I'm supposed to dress in a potato sack because if I try to look good (for me! Darn it, I've worked hard to get to wear I am! [that PUN was intended. I've worked hard and want to WEAR clothes that show off my hard work. We're not talking stripper clothes here or anything. Basically, just the same kind of clothes these women are wearing to the same parties.]) Geez!
Note: I'm for adding extra lights on that side of your house. :bigsmile:0 -
Why do people assume just because you're single that you want their husbands? This has happened to me before as well. People are crazy. I told them that I didn't want the husband that I had, so I definitely don't want their husband.
My guess, their husbands have cheated before and they will never been able to look at a human again without being accused of cheating. I'd take the divorce over living like that...0
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