PARENTING FAIL, big time . . .

My seven year old had a state level wrestling tournament today, for which he needed to weigh in at 76 lbs or less to compete:

After he was snowed out of over six hours of practice this week . . . I let him have dinner at his grandmother's house last night without being there to supervise and stop her "need to feed." (What was I thinking?!!)

THE AGONY OF DEFEAT: He had to forfeit this morning, at 76.2 lbs. :sad:

FUNNY SIDE: After weighing in, he came home for a substanstial . . . er, "evacuation." :laugh: *sigh*

SILVER LINING: Maybe letting Grandma see the tears will help her understand why it's NOT NICE to overfeed kids. :angry:
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Replies

  • Lizzy622
    Lizzy622 Posts: 3,705 Member
    He will recover. My son wrestles in the 195 weight class and is a senior. He almost had the opposite problem when he got sick and dropped weight. Just some advice. My son runs cross country in the fall and it has increased his wrestling stamina substantially. Good luck
  • He will recover. My son wrestles in the 195 weight class and is a senior. He almost had the opposite problem when he got sick and dropped weight. Just some advice. My son runs cross country in the fall and it has increased his wrestling stamina substantially. Good luck

    Thanks. I don't know if they have cross country for seven year olds, but I can look into it. I was thinking gymnastics off season this year - it's good for his strength/balance (and he really likes the trampoline related stuff.)

    You're right though - kids are pretty resilient. I doubt we'll wind up in therapy over this . . .
  • SCV34
    SCV34 Posts: 2,048 Member
    My seven year old had a state level wrestling tournament today, for which he needed to weigh in at 76 lbs or less to compete:

    After he was snowed out of over six hours of practice this week . . . I let him have dinner at his grandmother's house last night without being there to supervise and stop her "need to feed." (What was I thinking?!!)

    THE AGONY OF DEFEAT: He had to forfeit this morning, at 76.2 lbs. :sad:

    FUNNY SIDE: After weighing in, he came home for a substanstial . . . er, "evacuation." :laugh: *sigh*

    SILVER LINING: Maybe letting Grandma see the tears will help her understand why it's NOT NICE to overfeed kids. :angry:

    Is the Grandmother in question aware of what is expected of him when he has to compete?

    If not, then maybe there should be a conversation about that.

    And I am reading it correctly, you are talking about a seven year old?
  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member
    It ain't granny failing.
  • [/quote]

    [/quote]

    Did the grandparents hold your son down and force feed him?
    [/quote]

    No, just offered him seconds before asking him if he was still hungry - at his age, he's still learning healthy eating habits and will sometimes keep eating when he's full if he likes something.

    I usually ask him to wait a few minutes. . . if he gets distracted by something to do or play, he's full. If he comes back to the table, then he really is hungry and he can have some more. I don't just keep putting food on his plate until he tells me to stop.
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
    Pretty crappy that they wouldn't just move him up to a higher weight category. When I used to compete at judo as a kid, that's what would happen. There was no "failing" a weigh in at that age either. You weighed in, got a number written on your hand in marker pen, and you fought the other kids who had the same number as you. Only when I was in my early teens competing at area to national level, was there any not being allowed to compete for failing weight categories, and that was only certain tournaments. A lot of tournaments even at that level, you just moved up a category if you "failed" the weigh-in.

    Why don't they just let kids go up a weight category? I mean he's only seven FFS. Seriously, not allowed to compete over 0.2lb??
  • Tigg_er
    Tigg_er Posts: 22,001 Member

    Pretty crappy that they wouldn't just move him up to a higher weight category. When I used to compete at judo as a kid, that's what would happen. There was no "failing" a weigh in at that age either. You weighed in, got a number written on your hand in marker pen, and you fought the other kids who had the same number as you. Only when I was in my early teens competing at area to national level, was there any not being allowed to compete for failing weight categories, and that was only certain tournaments. A lot of tournaments even at that level, you just moved up a category if you "failed" the weigh-in.

    Why don't they just let kids go up a weight category? I mean he's only seven FFS. Seriously, not allowed to compete over 0.2lb??

    Thats who I'd Be pissed at the Tournament , not Grandma
  • Breakdown64
    Breakdown64 Posts: 22 Member
    Sorry about your boy, but it's only one meet and hopefully this helps him learn for himself to control his food intake when he has a weigh-in. I don't think it was a parenting fail anymore than it was a Grandma fail.

    Good luck!
  • randomtai
    randomtai Posts: 9,003 Member


    Pretty crappy that they wouldn't just move him up to a higher weight category. When I used to compete at judo as a kid, that's what would happen. There was no "failing" a weigh in at that age either. You weighed in, got a number written on your hand in marker pen, and you fought the other kids who had the same number as you. Only when I was in my early teens competing at area to national level, was there any not being allowed to compete for failing weight categories, and that was only certain tournaments. A lot of tournaments even at that level, you just moved up a category if you "failed" the weigh-in.

    Why don't they just let kids go up a weight category? I mean he's only seven FFS. Seriously, not allowed to compete over 0.2lb??

    Thats who I'd Be pissed at the Tournament , not Grandma

    Pretty much this.
  • KarmaKills
    KarmaKills Posts: 99 Member
    My son had to sit out half a game when he played Pop Warner Tackle football because he was a 1/2 pound under the weight requirement. The coach made him drink fluids to gain the weight....which he did....but promptly threw up after weighing in again, so they didn't let him play anyhow. lol
  • hotmomma0612
    hotmomma0612 Posts: 651 Member
    That's ridiculous. Poor kid. Just support him and remember for next time.

    However, don't be too overbearing on the little guy, we all want naughty food sometimes.
  • Mr_Bad_Example
    Mr_Bad_Example Posts: 2,403 Member
    My seven year old had a state level wrestling tournament today, for which he needed to weigh in at 76 lbs or less to compete:

    After he was snowed out of over six hours of practice this week . . . I let him have dinner at his grandmother's house last night without being there to supervise and stop her "need to feed." (What was I thinking?!!)

    THE AGONY OF DEFEAT: He had to forfeit this morning, at 76.2 lbs. :sad:

    FUNNY SIDE: After weighing in, he came home for a substanstial . . . er, "evacuation." :laugh: *sigh*

    SILVER LINING: Maybe letting Grandma see the tears will help her understand why it's NOT NICE to overfeed kids. :angry:

    Yeah, you tell Grandma not to overfeed your kid! Nothing boosts a child's self-esteem and self-concept like having to worry about how much he or she weighs!

    Good God.

  • Pretty crappy that they wouldn't just move him up to a higher weight category. When I used to compete at judo as a kid, that's what would happen. There was no "failing" a weigh in at that age either. You weighed in, got a number written on your hand in marker pen, and you fought the other kids who had the same number as you. Only when I was in my early teens competing at area to national level, was there any failing weight categories, and that was only certain tournaments. A lot of tournaments even at that level, you just moved up a category if you "failed" the weigh-in.

    Why don't they just let kids go up a weight category? I mean he's only seven FFS. Seriously, not allowed to compete over 0.2lb??

    We would have been happy to let him wrestle up - he's in the 95th percentile for height for his age and a pretty sturdy kid, and a local level they will let him do that, but not at state.

    Being big is an advantage in a lot of sports, but wrestling isn't one of them. He loves it though. He hates soccer. Maybe I can get him interested in football . . . (as well, not instead of wrestling.)
  • kitsune1989
    kitsune1989 Posts: 93 Member
    I just can't imagine getting upset because my child had one extra portion of food at grandmas. 0_o Seriously at seven those .2 pounds shouldn't have gotten him disqualified.
  • Mr_Knight
    Mr_Knight Posts: 9,532 Member
    Yeah, you tell Grandma not to overfeed your kid! Nothing boosts a child's self-esteem and self-concept like having to worry about how much he or she weighs!

    In a world of food abundance, high quality eating habits are an important skill.

    My 9 year old tracks calories, reads nutritional labels, and makes some basic food choices on his own.
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,458 Member
    Wow. I see eating disorder in this child's future.

    I'd pull him from that league because that's crazy irrational to prohibit participation because of .2 lbs. So many things wrong there.

    Show your child that you don't support irrational thinking and find another way for him to compete.
  • Mr_Knight
    Mr_Knight Posts: 9,532 Member
    Delete.
  • DavPul
    DavPul Posts: 61,406 Member
    Who doesn't poop before a weigh in? Next you'll be telling me that you had him drink a 32 ounce gatorade right before getting on the scale.

    All jokes aside, I really hope you aren't laying the blame for this at grandma's feet. Because that would be ridiculous
  • SunofaBeach14
    SunofaBeach14 Posts: 4,899 Member


    Pretty crappy that they wouldn't just move him up to a higher weight category. When I used to compete at judo as a kid, that's what would happen. There was no "failing" a weigh in at that age either. You weighed in, got a number written on your hand in marker pen, and you fought the other kids who had the same number as you. Only when I was in my early teens competing at area to national level, was there any not being allowed to compete for failing weight categories, and that was only certain tournaments. A lot of tournaments even at that level, you just moved up a category if you "failed" the weigh-in.

    Why don't they just let kids go up a weight category? I mean he's only seven FFS. Seriously, not allowed to compete over 0.2lb??

    Thats who I'd Be pissed at the Tournament , not Grandma

    Pretty much this.


    At that age, absolutely this.
  • Cranquistador
    Cranquistador Posts: 39,744 Member
    :indifferent:

    The best part of your post is WHAT WAS I THINKING? YOU decided to let him be there the night before a weigh in.

    Why would you place that on your mother? Dont have him visit the night before a weigh in. simple.

    What concerns me more is your Silver lining... terrible.

    it makes me very sad that this is the way you think about things. Instead of it being about time with family you obsess about what he eats with her. Guess what? If he has a balanced diet all week at home hanging out with his grandmother and eating more or having treats is NOT going to impact him negatively.

    I feel like seeing a counselor about the way you view food would be helpful
  • DavPul
    DavPul Posts: 61,406 Member
    ^good call about that silver lining. It's abominable
  • Iwishyouwell
    Iwishyouwell Posts: 1,888 Member
    Did grandma know what was at stake?
  • amandakev88
    amandakev88 Posts: 328 Member
    grandma was just being grandma. be happy she gives you some time off.

    be pissed at the school for making a SEVEN YEAR OLD leave the tourney. over .02 lbs. WTF.

    and if this is a parenting fail then i guess i should just give my kid up to children's aid.

    really!?
  • mccindy72
    mccindy72 Posts: 7,001 Member
    My seven year old had a state level wrestling tournament today, for which he needed to weigh in at 76 lbs or less to compete:

    After he was snowed out of over six hours of practice this week . . . I let him have dinner at his grandmother's house last night without being there to supervise and stop her "need to feed." (What was I thinking?!!)

    THE AGONY OF DEFEAT: He had to forfeit this morning, at 76.2 lbs. :sad:

    FUNNY SIDE: After weighing in, he came home for a substanstial . . . er, "evacuation." :laugh: *sigh*

    SILVER LINING: Maybe letting Grandma see the tears will help her understand why it's NOT NICE to overfeed kids. :angry:

    this was my issue with wrestling. My son was a wrestler from age 6 to 17. We said from day 1 that he would never, ever wrestle in a weight class below his current weight. We saw too many kids starving themselves trying to lose 20-30 lbs below their normal, healthy weight, and following dangerous sweating and dehydration practices to try to make weight. My son was in cross-country in the fall, wrestling all winter, and track in the spring. the distance running gave him the stamina he needed to be successful in wrestling, even when he was in weight classes where his opponents had cut weight to compete and he was giving up muscle mass. It's not worth their health to try to be successful at a sport they won't ever care about again after graduation.
  • summertime_girl
    summertime_girl Posts: 3,945 Member
    Wow, I think that's insane to put that kind of weight pressure on such a young kid.
  • ohno ): poor grandma.. i'm so glad mine attempts to overfeed me tho. grandma cooking is the best cooking.
  • twixlepennie
    twixlepennie Posts: 1,074 Member
    Wow, I think that's insane to put that kind of weight pressure on such a young kid.

    This. I had no idea these kind of weight rules even existed in sports. We're a hockey family and you can't even see the kid under all the padding/equipment they have to wear :laugh:
  • mccindy72
    mccindy72 Posts: 7,001 Member
    Wow, I think that's insane to put that kind of weight pressure on such a young kid.

    This. I had no idea these kind of weight rules even existed in sports. We're a hockey family and you can't even see the kid under all the padding/equipment they have to wear :laugh:

    wrestling is the absolute worst offender. My son had kids in his weight class in high school (135 lbs) who weight 165 a month before season started. they can't be an ounce over their class weight limit or they can't wrestle, there is only one kid per weight class per team. These kids will put Jolly Ranchers in their mouths and just spit into a bottle the whole morning before weigh in to lose a pound of water weight.
  • twixlepennie
    twixlepennie Posts: 1,074 Member
    Wow, I think that's insane to put that kind of weight pressure on such a young kid.

    This. I had no idea these kind of weight rules even existed in sports. We're a hockey family and you can't even see the kid under all the padding/equipment they have to wear :laugh:

    wrestling is the absolute worst offender. My son had kids in his weight class in high school (135 lbs) who weight 165 a month before season started. they can't be an ounce over their class weight limit or they can't wrestle, there is only one kid per weight class per team. These kids will put Jolly Ranchers in their mouths and just spit into a bottle the whole morning before weigh in to lose a pound of water weight.

    :noway: That's nuts!
  • tigersword
    tigersword Posts: 8,059 Member
    Man, I can't believe people are taking this thread so seriously. Am I the only one who sees a tongue in cheek comment?

    Also, no catch weight or grace weight in these tournaments?
This discussion has been closed.