PARENTING FAIL, big time . . .
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Dial 1-800-INGRATES
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You're annoyed with Grandma because she did a craft with your daughter and bought her shoes. I hope someday soon you will realize how ridiculous that sounds.
If your three year old is heartbroken and feels less loved because her big sister got some shoes,she has issues beyond what grandma does or doesn't do.
edit to add
you said
I care that this is my daughter's first year in school and I wanted to help her make Valentine's for her classmates.
So, it's about you, not about your daughter's happiness or her spending time with Grandma doing fun stuff.
Got it.
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You sound like a jerk. It is HER child, why can't she be the one to make valentines with HER daughter. The grandparent overstepped their boundaries.
Also, kids younger than her daughter on down to 4yrs old know when they are left out. It does not have to be the parent who points that out.
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If you read the previous posts you would know that Grandma wasn't aware of the rule that she wasn't to make Valentines and wasn't aware of the rule that she needed to ask Mom because Mom hadn't told her those rules. So, Mom hadn't established the boundaries; how can you blame Grandma for overstepping boundaries?
Furthermore, if you have children, you would know that you cannot treat each child exactly the same at exactly the same time; doesn't mean you aren't being a fair parent.
edit: tried to trim quotes, messed up format0 -
Agree with above. Children could benefit with a little "life isn't always fair" lessons. In later years they won't always be treated the same or always treated fairly and that is life. It is probably beneficial in the long run.0
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Make more Valentines with your daughter and take them to patients at a hospital. Teach your child about random acts of kindness and share in that with her. Then celebrate with mommy and daughter hot chocolates with lots of whipped cream.0
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Pretty crappy that they wouldn't just move him up to a higher weight category. When I used to compete at judo as a kid, that's what would happen. There was no "failing" a weigh in at that age either. You weighed in, got a number written on your hand in marker pen, and you fought the other kids who had the same number as you. Only when I was in my early teens competing at area to national level, was there any not being allowed to compete for failing weight categories, and that was only certain tournaments. A lot of tournaments even at that level, you just moved up a category if you "failed" the weigh-in.
Why don't they just let kids go up a weight category? I mean he's only seven FFS. Seriously, not allowed to compete over 0.2lb??
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So at least one of the "horrible" grandmas is a paternal grandparent. Are both? Because I've noticed that many moms tend to view innocuous behavior on the part of the M'sIL as egregious when the same behavior from their own mother wouldn't cause them to bat an eye.0
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As an Aunt who loves to spoil her niece and nephew, I'm getting a kick out of these posts.
When I babysit, I spoil them rotten. All the ipad time they want and I bring an ample supply of candy.
They are active kids and only eat as much as they want. They never finish what I give them. They like
Eating fruits and veggies. They even like sushi. Salmon and tuna. Ages 7 & 9.0 -
As an Aunt who loves to spoil her niece and nephew, I'm getting a kick out of these posts.
When I babysit, I spoil them rotten. All the ipad time they want and I bring an ample supply of candy.
They are active kids and only eat as much as they want. They never finish what I give them. They like
Eating fruits and veggies. They even like sushi. Salmon and tuna. Ages 7 & 9.
Hey, my kid would like another auntie...0 -
As an Aunt who loves to spoil her niece and nephew, I'm getting a kick out of these posts.
When I babysit, I spoil them rotten. All the ipad time they want and I bring an ample supply of candy.
They are active kids and only eat as much as they want. They never finish what I give them. They like
Eating fruits and veggies. They even like sushi. Salmon and tuna. Ages 7 & 9.
I used to be more bent out of shape when our moms spoiled our little girl and then I realized...I'd do it too. I just got mad because I had to deal with the aftermath of a little girl who hasn't hear no all day and now mommy and daddy sound mean because they won't let her do whatever she wants. I'd spoil grandkids/neices/nephews too, why not?! You get to be the awesome one! And my little girl is also a good eater, loves healthy food, eats broccoli like its candy and will try anything. (She tried squid the other day and liked it.) So I really couldn't complain about them spoiling her, I made a bigger deal than it needed to be. My little girl even gets spoiled at the places we frequent, free mango lassi at the Indian restaurant, free candy at the Mexican restaurant, free cookie at the grocery store...let people spoil your kids and then you be the one who sets limits...as long as they have limits somewhere, it will be just fine.0 -
As an Aunt who loves to spoil her niece and nephew, I'm getting a kick out of these posts.
When I babysit, I spoil them rotten. All the ipad time they want and I bring an ample supply of candy.
They are active kids and only eat as much as they want. They never finish what I give them. They like
Eating fruits and veggies. They even like sushi. Salmon and tuna. Ages 7 & 9.
Hey, my kid would like another auntie...
Bring 'em over. Best part of being an aunt is that I don't have to follow the rules. I'm happy I have a brother and SIL who understand their place and my place in their children's lives.0 -
As an Aunt who loves to spoil her niece and nephew, I'm getting a kick out of these posts.
When I babysit, I spoil them rotten. All the ipad time they want and I bring an ample supply of candy.
They are active kids and only eat as much as they want. They never finish what I give them. They like
Eating fruits and veggies. They even like sushi. Salmon and tuna. Ages 7 & 9.
Hey, my kid would like another auntie...
Bring 'em over. Best part of being an aunt is that I don't have to follow the rules. I'm happy I have a brother and SIL who understand their place and my place in their children's lives.
My kids have an "auntie" who treated them a lot; money, gifts, etc. Christmas gifts from her were bigger than what we gave them. It bothered me a little but she wasn't going to stop and truthfully I didn't have a good reason to make her stop.
My job was to see that they thanked her properly and didn't take her gift giving for granted. As they got older I encouraged them to buy her gifts with their own money.0 -
Dayone...You should start a thread about good parenting tips...I think many of us could learn a lot from you!0
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Dayone...You should start a thread about good parenting tips...I think many of us could learn a lot from you!
:flowerforyou: Thanks. I would but then I'd have to talk about my views on spanking which usually gets the thread locked.0 -
As an Aunt who loves to spoil her niece and nephew, I'm getting a kick out of these posts.
When I babysit, I spoil them rotten. All the ipad time they want and I bring an ample supply of candy.
They are active kids and only eat as much as they want. They never finish what I give them. They like
Eating fruits and veggies. They even like sushi. Salmon and tuna. Ages 7 & 9.
Hey, my kid would like another auntie...
Bring 'em over. Best part of being an aunt is that I don't have to follow the rules. I'm happy I have a brother and SIL who understand their place and my place in their children's lives.
My kids have an "auntie" who treated them a lot; money, gifts, etc. Christmas gifts from her were bigger than what we gave them. It bothered me a little but she wasn't going to stop and truthfully I didn't have a good reason to make her stop.
My job was to see that they thanked her properly and didn't take her gift giving for granted. As they got older I encouraged them to buy her gifts with their own money.
Honestly, I'm broke and they have grandparents who supply the big gifts. They have enough "stuff" and my goal is to be the person they trust to go to when they get older. My niece is 7 and loves to tell me secrets. I make it a point to never betray this trust. My hope is that I can be a person she will continue to share with when she is older.
We aren't a perfect family, but our roles (grandma, aunt) are well defined and the kids get it. An evening with me is not going to undermine a week of good parenting. I really do think that my brother and SIL are great parents. My goal is to be a great aunt.0 -
Dayone...You should start a thread about good parenting tips...I think many of us could learn a lot from you!
:flowerforyou: Thanks. I would but then I'd have to talk about my views on spanking which usually gets the thread locked.
I can only imagine the fire that would create!0 -
As an Aunt who loves to spoil her niece and nephew, I'm getting a kick out of these posts.
When I babysit, I spoil them rotten. All the ipad time they want and I bring an ample supply of candy.
They are active kids and only eat as much as they want. They never finish what I give them. They like
Eating fruits and veggies. They even like sushi. Salmon and tuna. Ages 7 & 9.
Hey, my kid would like another auntie...
Bring 'em over. Best part of being an aunt is that I don't have to follow the rules. I'm happy I have a brother and SIL who understand their place and my place in their children's lives.
My kids have an "auntie" who treated them a lot; money, gifts, etc. Christmas gifts from her were bigger than what we gave them. It bothered me a little but she wasn't going to stop and truthfully I didn't have a good reason to make her stop.
My job was to see that they thanked her properly and didn't take her gift giving for granted. As they got older I encouraged them to buy her gifts with their own money.
Honestly, I'm broke and they have grandparents who supply the big gifts. They have enough "stuff" and my goal is to be the person they trust to go to when they get older. My niece is 7 and loves to tell me secrets. I make it a point to never betray this trust. My hope is that I can be a person she will continue to share with when she is older.
We aren't a perfect family, but our roles (grandma, aunt) are well defined and the kids get it. An evening with me is not going to undermine a week of good parenting. I really do think that my brother and SIL are great parents. My goal is to be a great aunt.
Dead on with the "evening with (a spoiling caretaker) won't undermine a week of good parenting!0 -
"I usually ask him to wait a few minutes. . . if he gets distracted by something to do or play, he's full. If he comes back to the table, then he really is hungry and he can have some more. I don't just keep putting food on his plate until he tells me to stop...."
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Sounds like an eating disorder in the making. Seriously.
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God, my brother wrestled starting at this age (well, earlier). By the time he was a senior, he had such disordered eating that my mom used to sneak protein powder into his food so he'd eat actual calories. Looking back at his high school pictures- his skin is grey and his eyes are sunk in, because of weight cutting and restrictions. I am not ok with this kind of weigh in at this age. .2 lbs over at age 7 and reserved food is just unnerving.0 -
lol i encourage all forms of spoiling from my girls grandparents and uncles... particularly during babysitting... reason being, after a full day of yes,yes,yes my little monsters SLEEP IN the next morning....
op, yeah no, thats not a fail..0 -
As an Aunt who loves to spoil her niece and nephew, I'm getting a kick out of these posts.
When I babysit, I spoil them rotten. All the ipad time they want and I bring an ample supply of candy.
They are active kids and only eat as much as they want. They never finish what I give them. They like
Eating fruits and veggies. They even like sushi. Salmon and tuna. Ages 7 & 9.
Hey, my kid would like another auntie...
Bring 'em over. Best part of being an aunt is that I don't have to follow the rules. I'm happy I have a brother and SIL who understand their place and my place in their children's lives.
My kids have an "auntie" who treated them a lot; money, gifts, etc. Christmas gifts from her were bigger than what we gave them. It bothered me a little but she wasn't going to stop and truthfully I didn't have a good reason to make her stop.
My job was to see that they thanked her properly and didn't take her gift giving for granted. As they got older I encouraged them to buy her gifts with their own money.
Honestly, I'm broke and they have grandparents who supply the big gifts. They have enough "stuff" and my goal is to be the person they trust to go to when they get older. My niece is 7 and loves to tell me secrets. I make it a point to never betray this trust. My hope is that I can be a person she will continue to share with when she is older.
We aren't a perfect family, but our roles (grandma, aunt) are well defined and the kids get it. An evening with me is not going to undermine a week of good parenting. I really do think that my brother and SIL are great parents. My goal is to be a great aunt.
Dead on with the "evening with (a spoiling caretaker) won't undermine a week of good parenting!
I think I'm lucky that they are good parents and don't expect others to do their job.0 -
My seven year old had a state level wrestling tournament today, for which he needed to weigh in at 76 lbs or less to compete:
After he was snowed out of over six hours of practice this week . . . I let him have dinner at his grandmother's house last night without being there to supervise and stop her "need to feed." (What was I thinking?!!)
THE AGONY OF DEFEAT: He had to forfeit this morning, at 76.2 lbs. :sad:
FUNNY SIDE: After weighing in, he came home for a substanstial . . . er, "evacuation." :laugh: *sigh*
SILVER LINING: Maybe letting Grandma see the tears will help her understand why it's NOT NICE to overfeed kids.
Ah yes, I remember dropping weight to fit the class I wanted to compete in when I was in martial arts. One tourney I did really well... the kicker? The finals were the winners of all weight classes competing against each other, double elim. WTF. I could have just been in a more comfortable weight class!
He'll get over it, and learn he needs to control weight if he wants to compete, good lesson for all!0
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