my fiance keeps junk in the house

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  • Lesa_Sass
    Lesa_Sass Posts: 2,213 Member
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    for those of you who are fully invested in this soap opera of a thread...I actually talked to my fiancé about my feelings and a lot of what's been said here. bottom line:

    1. he's not an *kitten*
    2. I'm not always the best communicator
    3. junk food will live at work for four weeks
    4. then he will have a drawer in the pantry
    5. he likes his other junk to be able to roam free (in the house)
    6. I'm ok with that
    7. we really do love and care for each other...but it's not always roses and lollipops
    8. some of y'all really cracked me up and had some insightful things to share
    9. some of y'all are real turkeys, and that's not my problem
    10. peace out.

    Compromise and communication, the two most important things in a relationship. Good for you for working it out
  • sloth3toes
    sloth3toes Posts: 2,212 Member
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    for those of you who are fully invested in this soap opera of a thread...I actually talked to my fiancé about my feelings and a lot of what's been said here. bottom line:

    1. he's not an *kitten*
    2. I'm not always the best communicator
    3. junk food will live at work for four weeks
    4. then he will have a drawer in the pantry
    5. he likes his other junk to be able to roam free (in the house)
    6. I'm ok with that
    7. we really do love and care for each other...but it's not always roses and lollipops
    8. some of y'all really cracked me up and had some insightful things to share
    9. some of y'all are real turkeys, and that's not my problem
    10. peace out.

    Glad we could help.

    charity-help3-404x256.jpg
  • Amy4President
    Amy4President Posts: 165 Member
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    I don't live with a significant other, but I do live with 4 roommates in one house. One eats pretty healthy (but still has ice cream on hand), one cooks amazing Italian meals (hello carbs), one lives off of pasta and weights 114lbs (not kidding, I'm so jealous), and the fourth keeps a bunch of junk in the house (and is the heaviest out of all of us). It's hard because there is always beer (in its own fridge even), wine, ice cream, cookies, candies, etc. etc. in this house. I try so hard not to buy any of it and just avoid the processed food aisles in general. But I knew that if I had a craving, I could find something in the house to eat because it's always there. What stops me is knowing it's not my food. We're all in law school, we're all on a budget. So while those Oreos seem like a good idea, they aren't mine and I don't want to have to buy an entire package to replace 3 of hers.

    I guess what I'm getting at is to start thinking of your fiancee's food as "his" food (even if purchased with joint funds). Those are HIS decisions, HIS purchases, and he decides what goes into HIS body. Whereas your container of strawberries is yours, your time at the gym is your decision, etc. etc. YOU can decide what you cook for dinner and to fill up most of your plate with salad and not junk.

    I'm not here to give you relationship advice (or anybody advice on that matter). But this way of thinking and helped me ward of temptations from living with 4 other people, so maybe it will help you too :)
  • lemonsnowdrop
    lemonsnowdrop Posts: 1,298 Member
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    I've been living with my husband for almost two years. I've been eating healthy for two months, and he still buys whatever junk food he wants. Chips, cookies, soda, you name it. He's not trying to lose weight, I am. Why shouldn't he enjoy snacks? I have enough self control to not eat those things. He's not forcing me to eat them, just like I won't force him not to.
  • rogerhartford
    rogerhartford Posts: 21
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    Really??? Has he finished unpacking yet??? To the left...to the left...
  • Arranna1212
    Arranna1212 Posts: 143 Member
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    I know a really great workout for whenever someone is offering you sweets.
    Stand up straight, pull your core tight, turn your head left, then right.. Repeat until they stop.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,692 Member
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    for those of you who are fully invested in this soap opera of a thread...I actually talked to my fiancé about my feelings and a lot of what's been said here. bottom line:

    1. he's not an *kitten*
    2. I'm not always the best communicator
    3. junk food will live at work for four weeks
    4. then he will have a drawer in the pantry
    5. he likes his other junk to be able to roam free (in the house)
    6. I'm ok with that
    7. we really do love and care for each other...but it's not always roses and lollipops
    8. some of y'all really cracked me up and had some insightful things to share
    9. some of y'all are real turkeys, and that's not my problem
    10. peace out.
    Sounds like you solved it. Keep on truckin'.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • RaspberryKeytoneBoondoggle
    RaspberryKeytoneBoondoggle Posts: 1,349 Member
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    Let the junk roam free.

    Uhmmmm.... you do know how most people take things literally, here?

    ron_jeremy.jpg


    Love junk in the house!!!;)
  • rosebette
    rosebette Posts: 1,659 Member
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    My husband was diagnosed as diabetic when he was in his mid 40s about 10 years ago. At the time, my 3 kids were still home (all teen-agers), and I didn't have any health or weight problems then. We eliminated all "white foods" from the house, stopped buying ice cream except as occasional treats and didn't keep cookies and things like that in the house anymore, and changed to eating more vegetables and proteins and fewer carbs. I have a bread machine that I used all the time that I use now only if I'm bringing something to a pot luck. My husband is exposed to temptations elsewhere when he travels; why should I subject him to it when he's at home? Why should I make his struggle harder for him? I still have my two sons at home with me. When my husband travels, we have pasta for dinner or order a pizza, but not when he's home. Also, my whole family began to eat healthier. My daughter who has since moved out is now a vegetarian and cooks everything from scratch. So I guess my response to OP is that if her significant other really cares about her, he might restrict his junk eating to when she's not around. Once a week, DH and I go out to dinner and might cheat a bit but the experience is more about eating in a restaurant together, not the food. The rest of the time, we stick to plan when he's at home. In a long-term relationship people try to support each others' efforts toward good health. This comes from an old broad who's been married 30 years.
  • amyjo3062
    amyjo3062 Posts: 3
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    I have the EXACT same problem! My fiance is a junk food junkie, and so am I. But I'm on a mission to change that. I refuse to buy any junk food (the worst I buy is Granola Bars or a vanilla pudding snack pack) But I also do the main shopping. If he wants the junk he has to buy it himself. And he will. But I keep it up high where I don't see it. Out of sight out of mind? right? well not always because I know that their is a can of Pringles calling my name but I just ignore it. Ive learned little tricks that seem to help. I no longer keep the fruit and veggies in the crisper drawers. I keep them right up front on the shelf or in clear containers (I saw this on the TODAY show a while back and it seems to work) And I have him keep his junk food snacks that he likes to take to work in his car (its cold atm so this works for now) and I keep all his soda at the bottom of the fridge behind the gallons of milk, water, juice etc. Hope he decides this is what's best for you in the long. Best of luck to you -x0x
  • Foodiethinking
    Foodiethinking Posts: 240 Member
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    [harsh advice follows]

    I'd suggest not trying to push what is ultimately your issue into being his problem.

    The fact is it is up to YOU to deal with your food choices and maintenance, and the rest of the world won't change to make it easier for you.

    Sorry but I agree with this.
  • navyrigger46
    navyrigger46 Posts: 1,301 Member
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    I have no idea what "junk" is, but I have an entire cabinet filled with Skittles, chocolate, candy bars chips and all kinds of other so called "junk food" so I fail to see how this is an issue? Furthermore, I fail to see how this apparent inconvenience to you is someone else's problem. Take responsibility for yourselves, quit blaming other people for your weaknesses and your problems. If you cannot control yourself it's your fault and your problem, own it.

    Rigger
  • NiCu02
    NiCu02 Posts: 5 Member
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    I completely understand your struggle, laughin. My husband is much taller and more athletic than I am, and his TDEE is like 3,000 cals, which is over 1,000 cals more than me. We compromised that he can buy his own treats but he just hides them around the house and then doesn't eat them in front of me. I think your request is very reasonable.

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