curvy girls or men who like them
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Your anger seems misplaced; it's at your situation, which I understand. Completely. I think you're mistaking "People comment because it is both triggering and people don't like to see others hurt themselves" with "offending." That sort of response usually comes from someone who doesn't want that nerve touched. And, you admit, you're not looking to get your ED managed.
I just comment, and continue to comment, because a calorie counting site is not a good spot for someone with an ED, or who is even just starting out recovery.
I hope whoever you're working with is helping you with both, as self-harm and EDs go hand-in-hand, since mistreating your body is still self-harm. And can result in tragedy just as quickly.
Good luck to you, yet again.
I admit that my ED is not my top priority. The reason I made a MFP is so I could keep track of if I'm being good or not.
Whenever I have a good day, or gain a pound or two in a week, I go off to tell my best friend, "Hey, it's getting a little better."
Whenever I have a bad day, dropping five pounds within a week, I go off to tell my best friend, "It's dropping again, I'm sorry..."
I use MFP so I can tell if I'm getting better or not, without my main focus on it. My ED didn't truly surface until after I had almost completely stopped self-harming, which I find slightly strange. One problem starts to go away, another arises.
Sorry if I seemed like a real b*tch in my reply. That's how I usually am, first 2 minutes I'm extremely defensive and then I turn extremely apologetic.
It's hard. I was the opposite--my self-harm really came out once I was recovering (for the first time) from my ED. It all goes hand in hand, and unhealthy coping mechanisms can often be traced back to the same root cause(s).
While I'm glad you have some support around you with your friend, I do hope you have a professional or can find one! They're better equipped to help with cognitive-behavioral therapy; you don't need to feel sorry for losing the weight when it's part of your problem! Learning to love ourselves includes forgiving ourselves, too.0 -
So much this.
I called it like five hours ago. I know a dumpster fire when I see one.
If we could just get some clean eating nonsense in here we'll have covered just about everything.
and don't forget sugar fear mongering....
I'm kicking off giving up sugar by doing a juice cleanse liver detox.
I have actually cut ALL sugar out of my diet and am eating fruit daily...
I cut out all sugar and replaced it with honey.
That, plus oil pulling has me feeling like a new woman.0 -
i'm 40-30-40. no one is scared of me losing weight. i'm still fat. i WISH i had this problem.0
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Well this has been fun.
Out of curiosity, what do people consider a nice way to say 'overweight'? I mean, I feel like this is a catch 22. If you say someone is 'overweight', that isn't a judgement on them as a human being, its just a statement of fact. I feel like if you say someone is 'plump' or 'husky' or 'robust' or whatever, they will just think 'man, that's a new way to call me fat'.
I agree. When I was overweight, I had just preferred to be called overweight. Calling me thick or whatever just made me feel like people were making fun of me.0 -
So much this.
I called it like five hours ago. I know a dumpster fire when I see one.
If we could just get some clean eating nonsense in here we'll have covered just about everything.
and don't forget sugar fear mongering....
I'm kicking off giving up sugar by doing a juice cleanse liver detox.
I have actually cut ALL sugar out of my diet and am eating fruit daily...
You cut ALL sugar out of your diet but you're eating fruit? O.o I could have sworn fruit had sugar in it.
"But it's natural sugar. that's different!" :noway:0 -
I think I forgot to take the square root of .69 and divide it by the whole number 69 = math fail on my part...
A waist to hip ration of 1.69 would mean that a woman's waist is 1.69 times as large as her hips. It's a curve, but usually not what people think of for curvy. And it's not particularly healthy since weight carried around the waist is what has been linked to the most diseases.I don't like when people refute the fact that I'm curvy just because I'm a size 2/4. My waist is 25 inches and my hips are 37...what about that isn't curvy?? My waist to hip ratio is 0.67!
according to the "theory of curviness" you need a waste to hip ration of 1.69 to be considered "curvy"....
ETA: And if you meant the inverse of this, then the corresponding waist to hip ratio would be 0.5917. :flowerforyou:0 -
So much this.
I called it like five hours ago. I know a dumpster fire when I see one.
If we could just get some clean eating nonsense in here we'll have covered just about everything.
and don't forget sugar fear mongering....
I'm kicking off giving up sugar by doing a juice cleanse liver detox.
I have actually cut ALL sugar out of my diet and am eating fruit daily...
You cut ALL sugar out of your diet but you're eating fruit? O.o I could have sworn fruit had sugar in it.
"But it's natural sugar. that's different!" :noway:
my fruit comes from a garden at the end of a rainbow and is delivered to me by fairy's riding on the back of unicorns, which means my fruit sugar is actually negative calories...0 -
I'm curvy as well and can't complain. I hate seeing people that think curves = fat... It doesn't at all. My husband prefers my curvy self rather than a stick girl. I just could be a more in shape, define curvy girl because we all know that hips can only shrink so far! Stick girls look unhealthy to me. There's got to be a little something there. Let me define my curvy... The difference between my hips and waist can usually be a pant size. I was a competitive swimmer for years and I still have the broad shoulders, smaller waste and strong legs. It doesn't matter what others think of you, it's what you think about yourself. I personally believe curvy is beautiful and something to be proud of.
Cringing right now...
I couldn't care less about curvy or not curvy or what guys like or don't like, I do me. But please don't refer to slender girls as "sticks." I'm curvy-ish, 34-22-33, but if I had a dollar for every time someone has referred to me as a stick, I could take us both out to lunch. It's demeaning, regardless of your measurements. "Tree trunk" isn't an acceptable title to sling at larger ladies so I don't believe "stick" is either.
Have a nice Monday everyone :flowerforyou:
*edited becuz I shpell like a bawsss0 -
... My husband prefers my curvy self rather than a stick girl....Stick girls look unhealthy to me. There's got to be a little something there....I personally believe curvy is beautiful and something to be proud of.
Cringing right now...
I couldn't care less about curvy or not curvy or what guys like or don't like, I do me. But please don't refer to slender girls as "sticks." I'm curvy-ish, 34-22-33, but if I had a dollar for every time someone has referred to me as a stick, I could take us both out to lunch. It's demeaning, regardless of your measurements. "Tree trunk" isn't an acceptable title to sling at larger ladies so I don't believe "stick" is either.
Have a nice Monday everyone :flowerforyou:
*edited becuz I shpell like a bawsss
My little sister was always picked on for being a "stick". She'd cry. It sucked. Slender is a much nicer way of describing a body type. You don't call "curvy" girls fat, you don't call real curvy girls lumpy (or maybe you do? still not sure on this one), and you definitely don't call slender girls sticks. But you can always call Lumpy Space Princess lumpy. I'm all mixed up on terms now. I think I presently fall into the fat and lumpy categories. Feel free to call me either... fact is fact.
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... My husband prefers my curvy self rather than a stick girl....Stick girls look unhealthy to me. There's got to be a little something there....I personally believe curvy is beautiful and something to be proud of.
Cringing right now...
I couldn't care less about curvy or not curvy or what guys like or don't like, I do me. But please don't refer to slender girls as "sticks." I'm curvy-ish, 34-22-33, but if I had a dollar for every time someone has referred to me as a stick, I could take us both out to lunch. It's demeaning, regardless of your measurements. "Tree trunk" isn't an acceptable title to sling at larger ladies so I don't believe "stick" is either.
Have a nice Monday everyone :flowerforyou:
*edited becuz I shpell like a bawsss
My little sister was always picked on for being a "stick". She'd cry. It sucked. Slender is a much nicer way of describing a body type. You don't call "curvy" girls fat, you don't call real curvy girls lumpy (or maybe you do? still not sure on this one), and you definitely don't call slender girls sticks. But you can always call Lumpy Space Princess lumpy. I'm all mixed up on terms now. I think I presently fall into the fat and lumpy categories. Feel free to call me either... fact is fact.
:flowerforyou:0 -
This might ruffle some feathers, but hey, what doesn't around here?
The popular narrative for these kinds of topics seems to be an endless amount of women saying "Yes I'm fat/overweight/obese but my husband/boyfriend/man loves those "curves" and is super upset with me for losing weight".
Look ladies, a lot of us are programmed to avoid ever even suggesting the remote possibility that you're fat. A lot of times we see you losing weight, getting in shape, looking better, but we will swear on a stack of bibles that we love your body at any size, and even feign upset that you might lose your "curves".
But the truth of the matter is that a lot (though obviously not all) of us men who pull that line are just playing nice and trying to be supportive. A lot of us would secretly LOVE, and be even more attracted to, your body after it's gotten toned and fit. Yes plenty of us still want you to maintain the boobs and the butt, but trust me, some of us doth protest too much.0 -
Could someone please give me a Cliff's and save me from reading 10+ pages?0
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NOCould someone please give me a Cliff's and save me from reading 10+ pages?0 -
I guess I should have elaborated on what I thought a "stick girl" is so my apologies I'm referring to the females who are so skinny they look under weight and unhealthy because they think they're fat. That is a stick girl to me. There is nothing wrong with being skinny, lean and in shape at all. It also doesn't help that I had just finished an article talking about girls with eating disorders who were worried about their "thigh gap". I would post a picture but I don't think it's necessary. I blame society for posting unrealistic norms for people.
Thin and in shape is great and good for those of you who are that way, but some of us work hard and have never been that way, but grew up being called fat because we had thighs that touched or weren't the smallest girls in the world. Fat, skit, rolly polly, and whatever else people use all the time isn't ok but you have to realize if you are slim and calling yourself fat, or are constantly worried what other people think, that those thoughts aren't ok either. Losing weight and being healthy isn't about fat and skinny. It's a combination of physical and mental health. If those negative thoughts consume you, then that's what you're outlook on life will be. I admit I am extremely jealous of slender ladies but I do know that my body isn't capable of that. With that being said, I apologize for offending anyone but I personally don't care what anyone calls me... fat, tub of lard, whatever, your thoughts of how I look don't matter to me, only what I think matters.0 -
Could someone please give me a Cliff's and save me from reading 10+ pages?
I ain't got time fo that. And really... neither do you, if you've got anything else in the world you could possibly do. This thread is a waste of time.0 -
I think I forgot to take the square root of .69 and divide it by the whole number 69 = math fail on my part...
A waist to hip ration of 1.69 would mean that a woman's waist is 1.69 times as large as her hips. It's a curve, but usually not what people think of for curvy. And it's not particularly healthy since weight carried around the waist is what has been linked to the most diseases.I don't like when people refute the fact that I'm curvy just because I'm a size 2/4. My waist is 25 inches and my hips are 37...what about that isn't curvy?? My waist to hip ratio is 0.67!
according to the "theory of curviness" you need a waste to hip ration of 1.69 to be considered "curvy"....
ETA: And if you meant the inverse of this, then the corresponding waist to hip ratio would be 0.5917. :flowerforyou:
All you have to do is take waist/hips...so the smaller the waist relative to the hips, the smaller the ratio and the "curvier" the person. So me at 0.67 is curvier than 0.69. I Math. 0 -
Horses for courses.
Me, I'm an extreme hourglass.0 -
I guess I should have elaborated on what I thought a "stick girl" is so my apologies I'm referring to the females who are so skinny they look under weight and unhealthy because they think they're fat. That is a stick girl to me. There is nothing wrong with being skinny, lean and in shape at all. It also doesn't help that I had just finished an article talking about girls with eating disorders who were worried about their "thigh gap". I would post a picture but I don't think it's necessary. I blame society for posting unrealistic norms for people.
Thin and in shape is great and good for those of you who are that way, but some of us work hard and have never been that way, but grew up being called fat because we had thighs that touched or weren't the smallest girls in the world. Fat, skit, rolly polly, and whatever else people use all the time isn't ok but you have to realize if you are slim and calling yourself fat, or are constantly worried what other people think, that those thoughts aren't ok either. Losing weight and being healthy isn't about fat and skinny. It's a combination of physical and mental health. If those negative thoughts consume you, then that's what you're outlook on life will be.
You don't have any idea how "healthy" someone is by just looking at them. And in most cases you really can't determine whether somebody is "underweight" either just by observing them in clothes.
Also a lot of people who are overweight, and have been for a long time, are extremely poor judges when it comes to ascertaining body fat levels. A lot of people you deem "skinny" could still be overweight, they just aren't as large as you are.I admit I am extremely jealous of slender ladies but I do know that my body isn't capable of that.
If I dropped you in the middle of Bangladesh or the DR of Congo, and took away your credit card, I think your body would tell you a different story regarding what it's capable of.0 -
I'm curvy as well and can't complain. I hate seeing people that think curves = fat... It doesn't at all. My husband prefers my curvy self rather than a stick girl. I just could be a more in shape, define curvy girl because we all know that hips can only shrink so far! Stick girls look unhealthy to me. There's got to be a little something there. Let me define my curvy... The difference between my hips and waist can usually be a pant size. I was a competitive swimmer for years and I still have the broad shoulders, smaller waste and strong legs. It doesn't matter what others think of you, it's what you think about yourself. I personally believe curvy is beautiful and something to be proud of.
Cringing right now...
I couldn't care less about curvy or not curvy or what guys like or don't like, I do me. But please don't refer to slender girls as "sticks." I'm curvy-ish, 34-22-33, but if I had a dollar for every time someone has referred to me as a stick, I could take us both out to lunch. It's demeaning, regardless of your measurements. "Tree trunk" isn't an acceptable title to sling at larger ladies so I don't believe "stick" is either.
^this. I am flat chested, with hardly any difference between my waist and hips. I have an athletic shape, and always have done. I don't have much in the way of "curves" at all. If I decided I was going to put on a stone (which I did at uni drinking all that beer/eating all that pizza/sleeping in when I should have been at training...) I would still be flat chested, with no waist and hips - just rounder. I am sick of being called a "stick", hearing that men want "curvy" girls because "only a dog wants a bone", that I should "go eat a burger" and all the rest of it. I have had boyfriends suggest I have breast implants (even a girl I didn't know well that was on a hen do I went on said to me when we were by the pool "honey, you'd have such a nice figure if you had some boobs, why don't you get them done"...yes really), I have had strangers tell me I look like a boy....abuse for your shape is not limited to those who are underweight, those of us with a shape that is not considered feminine enough also get our fair share.
Most of the time I know people don't mean anything by their use of the words "skinny", "stick" etc, but they can hurt someone just as much as "fat". "Slender" is so much nicer.
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