I'm running a marathon...

likitisplit

I thought a year to do a marathon was a realistic goal.

everything I read online said it was

lots of support from family and friends who have run

but obviously not. its okay, its better to just not bother than to try and fail. I would have just walked it but there we go!

Then why don't you listen to the people who tell you that you can?

laurenawolf

WHAT IS GOING ON IN THIS THREAD?!?

OP states she's going to run a marathon in a year for her friend
people tell OP that she likely needs more time
people suggest training plans
people say to manage expectations, because marathons are hard and she has no running experience


Somewhere in there we ended up stealing a wheelchair from a guy. I'm not quite sure how that happened.

This explained everything perfectly.

likitisplit

I didn't say it was easy - I said that you can get it :noway:

But since you seem to quit at everything else when the slightest hurdle gets in your way...

You don't know what you are talking about. To get moved up to the next banding of mental health support in my area, I would have had to have put my future with my children into jeopardy. I had to chose between showing I was able to mother them, or receive help for my mental illness.

That is the choice I made, that isnt me 'giving up at the first hurdle' because the first hurdle would have been way before the emergency meetings with the mental health team, the tears at the doctors surgery and the begging for support and advice, it wouldn't be opening my heart and my head to a person only for them to tell me that the service they offer doesnt quite work for my issues and that psychotherapy is not avaliable in my area unless I am admitted.

It gets to the point where trying to find support for your mental health problems costs you your mental health. I choose to keep going, to keep on keeping on and to just get by day to day. because its all I CAN do.

wait, so if i'm reading this correctly, you CAN in fact get access the mental health services via the NHS, but you choose to not go thru the process required for getting help? that is what i'm reading in your own words, right? that you don't want to try because it might be hard?

i like to have fun in the forums but real talk, get the help. because even if they take your kids away for a while, it might be the best thing for all involved. i'm not really seeing how you can be a positive force for your kids until you get some of your issues worked out.

work on you, then work on the kids, then work on wheelchairs for friends. right now the priorities are all jacked up.

/non-snark

Kids come first, your priorities make NO sense, they have food, nice house, smilies and love. EVERYTHING else comes second.

EVERYTHING>

They have nothing unless their mom is ok. Ask them.

firstsip

I didn't say it was easy - I said that you can get it :noway:

But since you seem to quit at everything else when the slightest hurdle gets in your way...

You don't know what you are talking about. To get moved up to the next banding of mental health support in my area, I would have had to have put my future with my children into jeopardy. I had to chose between showing I was able to mother them, or receive help for my mental illness.

That is the choice I made, that isnt me 'giving up at the first hurdle' because the first hurdle would have been way before the emergency meetings with the mental health team, the tears at the doctors surgery and the begging for support and advice, it wouldn't be opening my heart and my head to a person only for them to tell me that the service they offer doesnt quite work for my issues and that psychotherapy is not avaliable in my area unless I am admitted.

It gets to the point where trying to find support for your mental health problems costs you your mental health. I choose to keep going, to keep on keeping on and to just get by day to day. because its all I CAN do.

wait, so if i'm reading this correctly, you CAN in fact get access the mental health services via the NHS, but you choose to not go thru the process required for getting help? that is what i'm reading in your own words, right? that you don't want to try because it might be hard?

i like to have fun in the forums but real talk, get the help. because even if they take your kids away for a while, it might be the best thing for all involved. i'm not really seeing how you can be a positive force for your kids until you get some of your issues worked out.

work on you, then work on the kids, then work on wheelchairs for friends. right now the priorities are all jacked up.

/non-snark

Kids come first, your priorities make NO sense, they have food, nice house, smilies and love. EVERYTHING else comes second.

EVERYTHING>

Are you able to fully supply that with the rate of self-hatred and projected insecurities you have? Taking care of yourself IS taking care of your kids, because while feeding and sheltering a child is necessary, raising children to not see a self-hating, scapegoat-using mother is even better. No matter how much you might think you aren't in need of therapy or are "separating" how you see yourself from how you raise your kids, they know it and they see it. Raising your kids to love themselves requires you to love yourself, as well.

Linli_Anne

My heart is aching for you and your children right now. By choosing to "mother" them instead of getting help you need for an untreated mental illness is only hurting them. Mental illness affects everyone who is close to it, and no one is strong enough to stop that. You might put up a good fight for a while, but not forever.

Please, please, please find a way to get help that you need, help that you deserve, and help that will ultimately help your children.

By wanting to be a good mother to them, and wanting to find a way to fundraise for a better wheelchair for your friend, we can see examples of what I imagine is your light trying to shine, but, the "I quit" and the "I'm not good enough" attitude is going to rid you of that light.

Please, as one mother to another, get some help for your mental illness.

badbcatha05

..

DavPul

I didn't say it was easy - I said that you can get it :noway:

But since you seem to quit at everything else when the slightest hurdle gets in your way...

You don't know what you are talking about. To get moved up to the next banding of mental health support in my area, I would have had to have put my future with my children into jeopardy. I had to chose between showing I was able to mother them, or receive help for my mental illness.

That is the choice I made, that isnt me 'giving up at the first hurdle' because the first hurdle would have been way before the emergency meetings with the mental health team, the tears at the doctors surgery and the begging for support and advice, it wouldn't be opening my heart and my head to a person only for them to tell me that the service they offer doesnt quite work for my issues and that psychotherapy is not avaliable in my area unless I am admitted.

It gets to the point where trying to find support for your mental health problems costs you your mental health. I choose to keep going, to keep on keeping on and to just get by day to day. because its all I CAN do.

wait, so if i'm reading this correctly, you CAN in fact get access the mental health services via the NHS, but you choose to not go thru the process required for getting help? that is what i'm reading in your own words, right? that you don't want to try because it might be hard?

i like to have fun in the forums but real talk, get the help. because even if they take your kids away for a while, it might be the best thing for all involved. i'm not really seeing how you can be a positive force for your kids until you get some of your issues worked out.

work on you, then work on the kids, then work on wheelchairs for friends. right now the priorities are all jacked up.

/non-snark

Kids come first, your priorities make NO sense, they have food, nice house, smilies and love. EVERYTHING else comes second.

EVERYTHING>

this is why i can't have non snark things....

PikaKnight

I didn't say it was easy - I said that you can get it :noway:

But since you seem to quit at everything else when the slightest hurdle gets in your way...

You don't know what you are talking about. To get moved up to the next banding of mental health support in my area, I would have had to have put my future with my children into jeopardy. I had to chose between showing I was able to mother them, or receive help for my mental illness.

That is the choice I made, that isnt me 'giving up at the first hurdle' because the first hurdle would have been way before the emergency meetings with the mental health team, the tears at the doctors surgery and the begging for support and advice, it wouldn't be opening my heart and my head to a person only for them to tell me that the service they offer doesnt quite work for my issues and that psychotherapy is not avaliable in my area unless I am admitted.

It gets to the point where trying to find support for your mental health problems costs you your mental health. I choose to keep going, to keep on keeping on and to just get by day to day. because its all I CAN do.

wait, so if i'm reading this correctly, you CAN in fact get access the mental health services via the NHS, but you choose to not go thru the process required for getting help? that is what i'm reading in your own words, right? that you don't want to try because it might be hard?

i like to have fun in the forums but real talk, get the help. because even if they take your kids away for a while, it might be the best thing for all involved. i'm not really seeing how you can be a positive force for your kids until you get some of your issues worked out.

work on you, then work on the kids, then work on wheelchairs for friends. right now the priorities are all jacked up.

/non-snark

Kids come first, your priorities make NO sense, they have food, nice house, smilies and love. EVERYTHING else comes second.

EVERYTHING>

They have nothing unless their mom is ok. Ask them.

^This.

Not to mention, OP, you said earlier that you couldn't support your family so.....:huh:

3dogsrunning

I didn't say it was easy - I said that you can get it :noway:

But since you seem to quit at everything else when the slightest hurdle gets in your way...

You don't know what you are talking about. To get moved up to the next banding of mental health support in my area, I would have had to have put my future with my children into jeopardy. I had to chose between showing I was able to mother them, or receive help for my mental illness.

That is the choice I made, that isnt me 'giving up at the first hurdle' because the first hurdle would have been way before the emergency meetings with the mental health team, the tears at the doctors surgery and the begging for support and advice, it wouldn't be opening my heart and my head to a person only for them to tell me that the service they offer doesnt quite work for my issues and that psychotherapy is not avaliable in my area unless I am admitted.

It gets to the point where trying to find support for your mental health problems costs you your mental health. I choose to keep going, to keep on keeping on and to just get by day to day. because its all I CAN do.

wait, so if i'm reading this correctly, you CAN in fact get access the mental health services via the NHS, but you choose to not go thru the process required for getting help? that is what i'm reading in your own words, right? that you don't want to try because it might be hard?

i like to have fun in the forums but real talk, get the help. because even if they take your kids away for a while, it might be the best thing for all involved. i'm not really seeing how you can be a positive force for your kids until you get some of your issues worked out.

work on you, then work on the kids, then work on wheelchairs for friends. right now the priorities are all jacked up.

/non-snark

Kids come first, your priorities make NO sense, they have food, nice house, smilies and love. EVERYTHING else comes second.

EVERYTHING>

Are you able to fully supply that with the rate of self-hatred and projected insecurities you have? Taking care of yourself IS taking care of your kids, because while feeding and sheltering a child is necessary, raising children to not see a self-hating, scapegoat-using mother is even better. No matter how much you might think you aren't in need of therapy or are "separating" how you see yourself from how you raise your kids, they know it and they see it. Raising your kids to love themselves requires you to love yourself, as well.

Oh so much of this.

I been the child. I had a nice home, food, nice clothes and smiles (during the good times). Even the bad times weren't horrific by any stretch of the imagination. The one thing I really wanted, more than anything else, was for my parent to get the help they needed.

TavistockToad

I would have just walked it but there we go!

So who exactly is stopping you?!!??!!

Iron_Feline

I would have just walked it but there we go!

So who exactly is stopping you?!!??!!

The MFP meanies who don't want her to get injured apparently.

TavistockToad

I would have just walked it but there we go!

So who exactly is stopping you?!!??!!

The MFP meanies who don't want her to get injured apparently.

I can't wait for the conversation tomorrow...

''Hi friend who I said I'd raise money for a wheelchair for... You know how I was going to do that? Well random strangers off the internet told me running a marathon was hard and required training, so... I'm just gonna not bother, weathers nice today isn't it?"

likitisplit

Well, we've ridden this one into the tar pit. Let me know if anybody needs me.

SillyC2

Jeepers - she doesn't need to "want to fail" here..... Plenty of people have gone from couch to marathon in a year. It's not all that rare, and it's fairly easy to find testimonials from those that have done it, blog posts, etc. So it's not a crazy goal at all, and you don't need to have mental health problems to think it's reasonable.

But nearly all the distance runners are saying that the time frame is about six months tight. Two years would be a better goal. A year to a HALF marathon is plenty fun and easy.