Any child free peeps on MFP?

lorigem

Apparently some breeders have taken offense to my post. Oh well...whattaya gonna do? :blushing:

^ Hah, looks like she edited her original post to take "breeders" out. Nice try.

I did. Knee-jerk reaction. Sue me. Apologies. :flowerforyou:

Knee jerk is just another term for instinctual and unguarded. Aka your true colours.

No I get it. I can see how that term might be offensive. I am just so used to calling my sister-n-law that as a joke. We laugh it off. That's why I edited the post - others might not find it funny.

wheird

Breeders, lol.

Noogynoogs

No kids

psych101

I had no idea that "child free" exclusively meant "child free by choice". I consider a solo trip to the store as "child free".

I am also not offended by the term "breeders".

Yep - me too. I learnt a new term today I suppose!

MapleFlavouredMaiden

I think that child free people seem hostile and angry (based solely on this post).

This post is stressing me out far worse than my child does when he is acting up.

Not here to argue, just stating how I interpreted the replies in here by those who don't seem to appreciate comments by people with children. To people who have children, being "child free" can simply mean a trip to the grocery store alone. I see that the OP was edited to clarify so many responses probably came in before she did that.

i think that a lot of what you see is maybe more of a knee-jerk reaction from a lot of us. some of this in here was genuine "no, the term means this". but every person who makes this choice is told the SAME things by society over and over and over and OVER. and it does grate, and it can make us a little quicker to defend. b/c we're so used to having to do that.

Not trying to argue (truly not, trust me), but I sometimes have a hard time believing that people who choose to be "different", whether it be child-free, vegan, paleo, etc. and complain about having to deal with "society at large" really do hate it. They never seem to get sick of posting repeatedly about the same damn thing. Over and over. Like "hey look at me I choose this lifestyle, aren't I special and unique!!" No one cares. And I don't feel bad if you have to defend it over and over again. The reason people don't memorize all of your labels and terms and special definitions is because it's your issue and no one else gives it any thought. But some of you seem to be so consumed by your own labels that it's all you talk about. Congrats you have no kids, what are you doing with all of your spare time? Oh... I see... you're posting on MFP about it.... every day.

surfinbird_1981

I don't have any little polluters :drinker:

AllOutof_Bubblegum

Yup - but obviously I'll change my mind (ask anyone they've told me often enough since I was 19 years old).:huh:

Right? I got married which undoubtedly meant that children will soon come after. Um...no. And I don't understand why it's unbelievable that a person or couple opt-out of parenting? Why is that so hard to believe? Never understood the mindset of some.

Just thought I'd answer this question ^^ because I see it crop up so often from child-free people:

Because for parents, it's unfathomable to imagine happiness without a sweet bundle in your arms. No judgement, of course. Some people just aren't cut out to be parents and that's perfectly ok.

But you need to understand that you are opting out of something that brings millions of people the most indescribable joy and life satisfaction. For someone to actively choose to pass that up is mind boggling. And for us THAT is what is hard to understand. I respect the choice and defend your right to have it, but I will never, ever understand it.

Hope that opens up some understanding. :flowerforyou:

Mr_Bad_Example

Just curious :flowerforyou:

:drinker:

Edit: And just to clarify, to be child free is to make the choice not to have children. Not, "I don't have kids now, but maybe some day." Nope, you are not child free.

Just because you want kids doesn't mean you have them, so if someone is child-free that pretty much means that he or she does not have children. Wanting them or not doesn't really factor in. With your logic, if I just walk around saying, "I want to be a billionaire", I'm a billionaire even if there is no money in my bank account.

Although... maybe if I just think that I'm rich...

odusgolp

Why do I keep comparing this to Gluten Free in my head?


*shrug* I want to go home now. It's been simply exhausting MFP'ing all day.

establishingaplace

I think that child free people seem hostile and angry (based solely on this post).

This post is stressing me out far worse than my child does when he is acting up.

Not here to argue, just stating how I interpreted the replies in here by those who don't seem to appreciate comments by people with children. To people who have children, being "child free" can simply mean a trip to the grocery store alone. I see that the OP was edited to clarify so many responses probably came in before she did that.

i think that a lot of what you see is maybe more of a knee-jerk reaction from a lot of us. some of this in here was genuine "no, the term means this". but every person who makes this choice is told the SAME things by society over and over and over and OVER. and it does grate, and it can make us a little quicker to defend. b/c we're so used to having to do that.

Not trying to argue (truly not, trust me), but I sometimes have a hard time believing that people who choose to be "different", whether it be child-free, vegan, paleo, etc. and complain about having to deal with "society at large" really do hate it. They never seem to get sick of posting repeatedly about the same damn thing. Over and over. Like "hey look at me I choose this lifestyle, aren't I special and unique!!" No one cares. And I don't feel bad if you have to defend it over and over again. The reason people don't memorize all of your labels and terms and special definitions is because it's your issue and no one else gives it any thought. But some of you seem to be so consumed by your own labels that it's all you talk about. Congrats you have no kids, what are you doing with all of your spare time? Oh... I see... you're posting on MFP about it.... every day.

I have been lucky to have a lot of CF friends, but I have met a lot of CF individuals who feel alone among their friends and in their communities. It's not "look at me I'm special" so much as individuals looking for community.

If you don't care, then why are you responding here?

MapleFlavouredMaiden

Why do I keep comparing this to Gluten Free in my head?


*shrug* I want to go home now. It's been simply exhausting MFP'ing all day.

Exactly. Trendy. Pointless. Old. And IDGAF

rm33064

I think that child free people seem hostile and angry (based solely on this post).

This post is stressing me out far worse than my child does when he is acting up.

Not here to argue, just stating how I interpreted the replies in here by those who don't seem to appreciate comments by people with children. To people who have children, being "child free" can simply mean a trip to the grocery store alone. I see that the OP was edited to clarify so many responses probably came in before she did that.

i think that a lot of what you see is maybe more of a knee-jerk reaction from a lot of us. some of this in here was genuine "no, the term means this". but every person who makes this choice is told the SAME things by society over and over and over and OVER. and it does grate, and it can make us a little quicker to defend. b/c we're so used to having to do that.

Not trying to argue (truly not, trust me), but I sometimes have a hard time believing that people who choose to be "different", whether it be child-free, vegan, paleo, etc. and complain about having to deal with "society at large" really do hate it. They never seem to get sick of posting repeatedly about the same damn thing. Over and over. Like "hey look at me I choose this lifestyle, aren't I special and unique!!" No one cares. And I don't feel bad if you have to defend it over and over again. The reason people don't memorize all of your labels and terms and special definitions is because it's your issue and no one else gives it any thought. But some of you seem to be so consumed by your own labels that it's all you talk about. Congrats you have no kids, what are you doing with all of your spare time? Oh... I see... you're posting on MFP about it.... every day.

That's a great take on it. You're a very thoughtful person with wonderful views on people different from yourself. Please post some more pics of yourself. You are such an inspiration to all of us, we hope we can be like you someday!

lorigem

I think that child free people seem hostile and angry (based solely on this post).

This post is stressing me out far worse than my child does when he is acting up.

Not here to argue, just stating how I interpreted the replies in here by those who don't seem to appreciate comments by people with children. To people who have children, being "child free" can simply mean a trip to the grocery store alone. I see that the OP was edited to clarify so many responses probably came in before she did that.

i think that a lot of what you see is maybe more of a knee-jerk reaction from a lot of us. some of this in here was genuine "no, the term means this". but every person who makes this choice is told the SAME things by society over and over and over and OVER. and it does grate, and it can make us a little quicker to defend. b/c we're so used to having to do that.

Not trying to argue (truly not, trust me), but I sometimes have a hard time believing that people who choose to be "different", whether it be child-free, vegan, paleo, etc. and complain about having to deal with "society at large" really do hate it. They never seem to get sick of posting repeatedly about the same damn thing. Over and over. Like "hey look at me I choose this lifestyle, aren't I special and unique!!" No one cares. And I don't feel bad if you have to defend it over and over again. The reason people don't memorize all of your labels and terms and special definitions is because it's your issue and no one else gives it any thought. But some of you seem to be so consumed by your own labels that it's all you talk about. Congrats you have no kids, what are you doing with all of your spare time? Oh... I see... you're posting on MFP about it.... every day.

I have been lucky to have a lot of CF friends, but I have met a lot of CF individuals who feel alone among their friends and in their communities. It's not "look at me I'm special" so much as individuals looking for community.

If you don't care, then why are you responding here?

My thoughts exactly.

surfinbird_1981

Why do I keep comparing this to Gluten Free in my head?


*shrug* I want to go home now. It's been simply exhausting MFP'ing all day.

Exactly. Trendy. Pointless. Old. And IDGAF

If you don't "GAF" why are you still posting on this thread? :huh:

odusgolp

Why do I keep comparing this to Gluten Free in my head?


*shrug* I want to go home now. It's been simply exhausting MFP'ing all day.

Exactly. Trendy. Pointless. Old. And IDGAF

I just don't particularly care if people want to procreate or not. I just want to feel the music...

MrsB123111

All my kids have 4 legs & fur :flowerforyou:

This. Plus my husband... He's all the child I can handle!

mscrystallee

Me!

maab_connor

I think that child free people seem hostile and angry (based solely on this post).

This post is stressing me out far worse than my child does when he is acting up.

Not here to argue, just stating how I interpreted the replies in here by those who don't seem to appreciate comments by people with children. To people who have children, being "child free" can simply mean a trip to the grocery store alone. I see that the OP was edited to clarify so many responses probably came in before she did that.

i think that a lot of what you see is maybe more of a knee-jerk reaction from a lot of us. some of this in here was genuine "no, the term means this". but every person who makes this choice is told the SAME things by society over and over and over and OVER. and it does grate, and it can make us a little quicker to defend. b/c we're so used to having to do that.

Not trying to argue (truly not, trust me), but I sometimes have a hard time believing that people who choose to be "different", whether it be child-free, vegan, paleo, etc. and complain about having to deal with "society at large" really do hate it. They never seem to get sick of posting repeatedly about the same damn thing. Over and over. Like "hey look at me I choose this lifestyle, aren't I special and unique!!" No one cares. And I don't feel bad if you have to defend it over and over again. The reason people don't memorize all of your labels and terms and special definitions is because it's your issue and no one else gives it any thought. But some of you seem to be so consumed by your own labels that it's all you talk about. Congrats you have no kids, what are you doing with all of your spare time? Oh... I see... you're posting on MFP about it.... every day.

no. i think that it's more about finding sameness. not about crying out uniqueness. we are (like all other humans) hard-wired to find those who are like us.

i'm also bi. i post in the LGBTQ+ threads too. and i'm a geek, post in those too. again, it's about finding sameness, about building the tribe of those who are like me in whatever way.

and all three of those things can bring on the rancor of those who are not like me. before geek was chic, i got bullied. but that is NOTHING compared to being bi and CFBC. for whatever reason, everyone on the planet thinks that they get a say in who i go to bed with and the state of my uterus.

should i hide who i am and play straight? should i birth a child i don't want? to make society happy? to be a "real woman" in their eyes? or should i find ppl who are like me, who have been through the same struggles and have heard all of the same hatred and cling to them -as they cling to me- for support and strength?

Jacwhite22

It would not have been fair to everyone else for me not to procreate. It's one of the few things that I have done to give back to society.

Zaftique

Child-free here, got fixed in 2005.

Got fixed in 2012. I love all my nieces and nephews, and will happily babysit....... because I get to hand them back at the end of the day.