how would you feel?

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  • nahsonfreepie
    nahsonfreepie Posts: 4
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    When my boyfriend mentioned he wanted to go to the strip club...
    I was hurt but tried to use it as fuel to better myself. The reason I didn't want him going was because I was insecure about my own body. I was scared he would never find me sexy again, after seeing the girls at the strip joint.

    I wanted to be the woman who was giving him these visual pleasures, but since he wasn't getting it at home, I couldn't be upset at him for wanting to go.

    I lost most of the weight and when I was comfortable, I surprised him with some new lingerie and I gave him the best damn lap dance, I could muster..and he hasn't asked to go back since.
  • SSAHM
    SSAHM Posts: 172 Member
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    Yea I sorta posted this after he got home and his drunkenness and my hormones made it not real pretty:ohwell: throw in a stupid haircut and it's ugly:wink:

    Seriously when he wakes up in the morning he may regret a few things thay happened when he got home (no for you dirty minded people not that) I hope he also has a he'll of a hangover and looks in the mirror and thinks WTF!!!
  • FitWithWit44
    FitWithWit44 Posts: 412 Member
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  • DivineChoices
    DivineChoices Posts: 193 Member
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    I want to go. My husband doesn't enjoy going to strip clubs because he doesn't trust himself to behave respectfully to me (even if I'm not there!) in that situation. That is his choice. And I can go to strip clubs any time because he doesn't care. I normally go every couple of years or so with my BFF.

    I need to start googling topless haircuts around here cause that sounds awesome!!

    OP - Your feelings are valid because you are feeling them. However, you need to talk to your husband. I know being pregnant can knock things out of whack, and make something that might seem inconsequential into a huge deal, and I know that you will be feeling self-conscious and might have body insecurities.

    I'm not EVEN pregnant and i have HUGE body insecurities that can sometimes make talking to me akin to crossing a mine field. My husband cannot fix those issues for me, no matter how hard he tries. I need to go to counseling and face my own issues. IDK if that is something you would want to do, because I don't know enough about you to say you need it or not. But you should consider it. And talk to your husband nicely about how you felt. Use "I" language, and not "you" language.

    Finally - let him rock that haircut for a few days, then ask if he could shave it all off.
  • firfeous
    firfeous Posts: 196 Member
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    Yea I sorta posted this after he got home and his drunkenness and my hormones made it not real pretty:ohwell: throw in a stupid haircut and it's ugly:wink:

    Seriously when he wakes up in the morning he may regret a few things thay happened when he got home (no for you dirty minded people not that) I hope he also has a he'll of a hangover and looks in the mirror and thinks WTF!!!

    Please get back to us once he wakes up and you talk to him!

    And pic, please! While he's sleeping!
  • crohnsfighter
    crohnsfighter Posts: 689 Member
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    Okay, my opinion on this one is a bit extreme one way so you take it how you want, or just leave it.

    I wouldn't care if I was pregnant or not, what the circumstances were or what his excuse was - If I told him not to go and he went, I would be pissed! If he were ever in a place like that without my knowing/my consent there would be some problems afterwards.
    This being said, I don't think I would ever give my man permission to be in a place like that and if you knew my husband you would know he is the type that has absolutely zero desire to be in a place like that. He was in the Army 8 years and was exposed to things like that constantly and he avoided them like the plague. So, if my husband went somewhere like that I would really have to question who he was.

    Lol. I bet you also make your husband sit down to pee so he doesn't dribble on the toilet rim.

    LOL
  • fit_war
    fit_war Posts: 985 Member
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    I would buy some sexy lingerie. .. and make a personal strip club for him in our bedroom... that must work :laugh: :drinker:
  • SSAHM
    SSAHM Posts: 172 Member
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    Not sure how much talking we will do when he wakes up because it went badly :-/

    On the brighter side. Seeing as he's such a heavy sleeper especially after he's been drinking part of me wants to go in with a pair of scissors and randomly hack at his remaining hair so when he wakes up I can say "see this is why you don't get haircuts in strip clubs". I could be sooo evil but won't :devil:
  • DivineChoices
    DivineChoices Posts: 193 Member
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    Not sure how much talking we will do when he wakes up because it went badly :-/

    On the brighter side. Seeing as he's such a heavy sleeper especially after he's been drinking part of me wants to go in with a pair of scissors and randomly hack at his remaining hair so when he wakes up I can say "see this is why you don't get haircuts in strip clubs". I could be sooo evil but won't :devil:

    I know a better plan....

    POST HIS PICS!
    POST HIS PICS!


    Sweetheart you must. I won't stop until this happens. Important work is being completely ignored for this cause. C'mon, have a laugh with us at his expense. My devilish impulses aside I really do think it would be a good way for you to get back at him without doing any real damage.

    C'mon...you know you wanna...

    You remind me of this quote, "I have a puckish side that will not be denied."
  • StacyAS999
    StacyAS999 Posts: 107 Member
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    OMG, this is killing me, I really needed entertainment today. So awesome.
  • SSAHM
    SSAHM Posts: 172 Member
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    Sorry but I'm not posting pics:tongue: I'm sure it will break the camera on my phone it's that bad. But at least everyone has helped cheer me up a little about the situation. If the aftermath of it all didn't happen I would go jump kiln bed with him and suck up but inexcusable things happened. :-/ and well leave it at that
  • srslybritt
    srslybritt Posts: 1,618 Member
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    I don't think he needs your "permission" to do anything (as others have suggested), but he should definitely have your feelings on the matter in mind when he makes that decision. Does he often disregard your objections to things? I think you should look at the bigger picture and not hone in on one experience. He's human, and if he's good to you and you have a healthy relationship, it's probably nothing to worry about.

    That being said, as long as he comes home to me at the end of the day and puts in the effort he should be to keep our relationship functioning smoothly, I'd be more angry at him for not taking me along and buying me a dance. But that's just me.

    ETA: You're married and having a child with him, so I hope there's a positive outcome here.

    ETA (again): I missed the haircut thing. What even...? But um, I mean, getting a haircut is pretty tame (even if it's a stupid haircut) in the grand scheme of things.
  • _JPunky
    _JPunky Posts: 508 Member
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    I feel so bad for the husbands of about 50% of the women in here.

    I'd probably go to a strip club just to get away from being told what I'm allowed to do.
  • SSAHM
    SSAHM Posts: 172 Member
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    Nothing sinister happened:smile: we were angry things were said he pushed me I fell over and hit my head and now have a little egg :grumble: really super angry about that part because he could has done some serious damage seeing as I'm pregnant.
    In saying that I was kinda trying to usher him out of the room because he woke the kids up raising his voice and was scaring them. So I may have nudged a little harder then I rrealised and he pushed back but still........
  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
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    Disrespected.

    However.. I'd go with him. Am I weird? Yes. Do I care. Nah.
  • firfeous
    firfeous Posts: 196 Member
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    Nothing sinister happened:smile: we were angry things were said he pushed me I fell over and hit my head and now have a little egg :grumble: really super angry about that part because he could has done some serious damage seeing as I'm pregnant.

    That's pretty sinister to me.

    Sorry, but that is not acceptable behavior EVER let alone when you are pregnant with his child.

    You have way bigger issues than him going to a strip club.

    Seek help, call a Domestic Abuse Hotline, a friend or family member, anything. Please.
  • calibriintx
    calibriintx Posts: 1,741 Member
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    Why would I ask him not to go? Can we not afford it? Am I on bed rest and need him to be my manslave and bring me food, etc.? Am I just hormonal and controlling? Is he trying to go to the strip club alone? (This is my only strip club issue. I think married dudes who go to the bad place ALONE are effing creepy. It's just....:gag: Yes, stereotypes are alive and well over here. Anyway, if he's going with me or friends, IDGAF)

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