Has anyone ever been dumped because of their weight?

12357

Replies

  • KrissyRawrz
    KrissyRawrz Posts: 342 Member
    I dumped my ex for a few reasons, and one of them was that he wouldn't let up about my own weight...

    Pushing me into Atkins diets and never letting me forget I was overweight ("You float when you swim because you're fat" - not due to physics or anything...) and other such stuff. Absolutely killed me; caused me to actually gain about 10kg while "dieting" because I kept relapsing due to lack of support/desire to diet and being forced into it.

    He was underweight. I never mentioned it (or at least, never negatively)... needless to say someone making you feel crap for whatever reason isn't worth your time or emotions. Just a shame it takes some of us so long to realise that :( *hugs for all*

    Good on you for getting out of there! You're a much stronger person than that *hugs*
  • tayleigh4
    tayleigh4 Posts: 90 Member
    Just remember that people lie. Especially if they are an insecure person. I had a guy at work today tell me about how beautiful and amazing and wonderful this girl he's "banging" is but because she put that she was in a relationship with him on FB he decided he was "bored" with her and was going to break up with her. It's a load of crap! He was just insecure and scared that it was moving to the next level.

    I'm sure it had nothing to do with your weight. If it did, why would he have started dating you in the first place if you were "so fat?" I'm sure it had nothing to do with you and was his own insecurities. Every day you learn annoying things about the other person you're dating and if all he could come up with is that you're too big for him then he couldn't actually come up with anything real.

    It's HIS loss, NOT yours! Don't ever let anyone treat you like that. No one deserves that- no one.

    Thank you, I wish we could read a man's mind but unfortunately we can't ha. That's what I said, why date me for 7 months if you were never attracted in the first place? I appreciate your answer & I will never let anyone treat me like that again :)
  • tayleigh4
    tayleigh4 Posts: 90 Member
    When my ex-husband and I were talking about trying again, he said to me "I've always loved you in spite of your weight". Another good one was one night we were having dinner and he's gained a few kgs since he turned 40 - he says to me "if I keep going like this I'll weigh as much as you in 12 months".

    Needless to say, we did not give things another try, and I'm now happy with my current partner who does not even see my weight.

    Wow, what a tool. I'm so happy you found someone who loves you for you & doesn't even think twice about your weight. Congrats <3 you deserve it!
  • tayleigh4
    tayleigh4 Posts: 90 Member
    My fiance many years ago, cheated on me with a married woman we had both just met at a car show. He never told me to my face but I'd read some of his messages to her, fat shaming me and discussing the details of their affairs.... =/

    He wanted to stay with me because the affair with the married woman was "just a fling", and I was the only one working and paying rent, bills, his cellphone bill etc... I was basically his meal ticket. He had no love left for me. He just needed my resources. D*mn straight I broke up with him. It was so hard to do too, after years of thinking you know a person...introducing them to your family and friends, your church etc...

    To make it worse the woman he cheated on me with had the audacity to send me nasty text messages about how she "would've told me what they were doing to my face but was afraid i'd eat her (oink oink)" !! All kinds of nasty messages..

    So what did I do? I found her husband (who was out of town on a business trip while she's driving around his mustang and cheating on him) on facebook, sent him a detailed message about what happened. I sent him logs and screen caps of their conversations too.

    Few days later the woman blows up my phone with texts again. Death threats for messaging her husband, saying she's going to "throw my fat *** in a wood chipper" and she knows where I work etc..

    She actually did end up coming to my job. Thankfully it was after we were closed and I was walking through the parking lot to my car. I guess it could've turned out a lot worse than it did. She could've had a gun or knife, could've brought a gang of people to beat me up etc. But it was just her, she attacked me. I dropped her like a sack of potatoes, twisted her arm behind her back at sat on it until the police got there. So in the end she was left with a divorce and a criminal record.

    I'm so sorry you were cheated on, that must be one of the worst feelings in the world. But I am SO glad you had the strength to end it. You deserve a wonderful man who will NEVER even think twice about another woman. You are so pretty, don't let anyone's mean words get you down. I'm proud you messaged her husband, he deserved to know as well. She is a crazy biotch. Going to your workplace? Wow.. Some girls are so psychotic LOL. I'm glad you fought back & you won in the end. I hope you're happy and doing well now :)
  • tayleigh4
    tayleigh4 Posts: 90 Member
    My fiance many years ago, cheated on me with a married woman we had both just met at a car show. He never told me to my face but I'd read some of his messages to her, fat shaming me and discussing the details of their affairs.... =/

    He wanted to stay with me because the affair with the married woman was "just a fling", and I was the only one working and paying rent, bills, his cellphone bill etc... I was basically his meal ticket. He had no love left for me. He just needed my resources. D*mn straight I broke up with him. It was so hard to do too, after years of thinking you know a person...introducing them to your family and friends, your church etc...

    To make it worse the woman he cheated on me with had the audacity to send me nasty text messages about how she "would've told me what they were doing to my face but was afraid i'd eat her (oink oink)" !! All kinds of nasty messages..

    So what did I do? I found her husband (who was out of town on a business trip while she's driving around his mustang and cheating on him) on facebook, sent him a detailed message about what happened. I sent him logs and screen caps of their conversations too.

    Few days later the woman blows up my phone with texts again. Death threats for messaging her husband, saying she's going to "throw my fat *** in a wood chipper" and she knows where I work etc..

    She actually did end up coming to my job. Thankfully it was after we were closed and I was walking through the parking lot to my car. I guess it could've turned out a lot worse than it did. She could've had a gun or knife, could've brought a gang of people to beat me up etc. But it was just her, she attacked me. I dropped her like a sack of potatoes, twisted her arm behind her back at sat on it until the police got there. So in the end she was left with a divorce and a criminal record.

    Congrats on your weight loss btw! Wow 80 pounds, keep it up girl! ;)
  • tayleigh4
    tayleigh4 Posts: 90 Member
    Definitely think it is his loss as you are very attractive and no one should really be dumped just because of their weight, he probably used it as an excuse as too cowardly to tell you how he truly felt to your face, so to speak.

    I have never been dumped due to my weight, as for most of my life I have been in reasonable shape, but due to my diabetes flaring up and having to go onto insulin and a very bad break up with my ex involving an 18 month court case in order to be able to see my daughter I literally ballooned over night and gained well over 35kgs.

    After the court case was sorted and I was in a better place I started going out again, but pretty much every woman I talked to would either turn away from me without so much of a word, look in disgust at my gut or basically tell me to 'get my fat *kitten* away from them'.

    It put me off trying to meet anyone new and I stopped going out. Roll on 9 months, no longer on insulin, diet under control and a serious gym addiction has led to 32kg weight loss and with me looking in the best shape of my life to the fact that I get compliments in the gym and asked for advice (I love having muscles now :)) I decided it was time to go back out.

    It was a friends birthday and I had no intention of trying to meet anyone but I did get hit on several times over the night, comments made like 'you must work out' etc and lots of inappropriate fondling and although it was an ego boost it did reaffirm to me that the human race, wether male or female are relatively shallow at heart.

    Anyway, you can do much better and will no doubt find a man who will appreciate you for who you are and find you attractive no matter what state your body is in. I have found a woman like that and I must say it is great to find someone who loves you for just being you no matter what.

    Definitely, I agree humans are shallow people. Last time I got down to a very low weight I had guys messaging me saying "you look so great, I've always thought you were pretty." Uhm no honey, you rejected me when I was fat. Lol. I'm SO proud that you are addicted to fitness now and you look great!! Keep your hard work up. I'm glad you found a woman who loves you for who you are :)
  • tayleigh4
    tayleigh4 Posts: 90 Member
    I'm not sure if I'm allowed to swear on here but that vile person disgusts me! *hugs*
    As someone else mentioned it's a bad reflection on him, not of you. Never feel like you have to change for someone else, only ever do it for yourself. If you're happy with the way you are don't let someone as horrible as that make you change yourself.

    There's plenty of people who will love and support you for who you are. If he can't, then that's his loss x

    Thank you love, I am definitely changing for myself :) congrats on your amazing success btw and keep it up! You look WONDERFUL :)
  • tayleigh4
    tayleigh4 Posts: 90 Member
    It did happen to me once. She said she needed a man who would "look after himself".

    I was really upset at the time. But it was never to be. I moved on.

    I'm glad I did go out with her for a summer, but actually I dodged a massive bullet. She was very immature. And a terrible game player, even though she was really nice as a person. I hope she has a nice life.

    The woman I'm with now is 100 times better. So please, OP, I know you must ne hurting now, but please don't let him make you bitter.

    I'm glad you moved on & found someone who appreciates and loves you for you! I am doing well now. His words mean nothing to me :) thank you.
  • tayleigh4
    tayleigh4 Posts: 90 Member
    I dumped my ex for a few reasons, and one of them was that he wouldn't let up about my own weight...

    Pushing me into Atkins diets and never letting me forget I was overweight ("You float when you swim because you're fat" - not due to physics or anything...) and other such stuff. Absolutely killed me; caused me to actually gain about 10kg while "dieting" because I kept relapsing due to lack of support/desire to diet and being forced into it.

    He was underweight. I never mentioned it (or at least, never negatively)... needless to say someone making you feel crap for whatever reason isn't worth your time or emotions. Just a shame it takes some of us so long to realise that :( *hugs for all*

    Good for you that you dumped him. That is SO hurtful. Don't ever let someone try to change you. Be who you are and be your beautiful self everyday and when you're ready to change, you will. And if you don't want to change, you don't have to! You're great the way you are. Hugs :****
  • tayleigh4
    tayleigh4 Posts: 90 Member
    I dumped my ex for a few reasons, and one of them was that he wouldn't let up about my own weight...

    Pushing me into Atkins diets and never letting me forget I was overweight ("You float when you swim because you're fat" - not due to physics or anything...) and other such stuff. Absolutely killed me; caused me to actually gain about 10kg while "dieting" because I kept relapsing due to lack of support/desire to diet and being forced into it.

    He was underweight. I never mentioned it (or at least, never negatively)... needless to say someone making you feel crap for whatever reason isn't worth your time or emotions. Just a shame it takes some of us so long to realise that :( *hugs for all*

    Good on you for getting out of there! You're a much stronger person than that *hugs*

    Agreed! So strong :)
  • yopeeps025
    yopeeps025 Posts: 8,680 Member
    I have mix feelings about this.
  • _SantaClause
    _SantaClause Posts: 335 Member
    I have mix feelings about this.

    I'm sure you do.
  • nicola8989
    nicola8989 Posts: 381 Member
    I'm sorry to hear that - he sounds like a bully. I was bullied by an ex for my weight, he would constantly call me fat even though he was 2 stone heavier than me!! I was overweight but certainly not fat. Ironically his constant bullying and putting me down caused me to gain almost 3 stone.

    I know you probably don't want to hear this right now, or believe it, but you're better off without him x
  • ghosthackexe
    ghosthackexe Posts: 181 Member
    I got dumped because of my weight when I was about 308 but you know what that gave me all the motivation I needed to start my journey currently 213 and only looking forward ^_^

    http://i.imgur.com/Ecf3GCl.gif <- teehee
  • jenilla1
    jenilla1 Posts: 11,118 Member
    If you were already heavy when you started the relationship and then 7 months later he dumps you for it, I'd say he was just looking for an excuse to end it. Your weight probably had little or nothing to do with the dumping, unless you gained all the weight in that 7 month period. A fast, extreme weight gain with no end in sight could have scared him off. Either way, you're better off without him. He wasn't right for you. :flowerforyou:
  • jodynolte
    jodynolte Posts: 243 Member
    Yep. I was too fat to ride his motorcycle with him. So he found someone who wasn't... and was waayyy younger... then pregnant. Needless to say, good riddance. But my weight loss is for me, as yours should be. I know there are good ones out there, you just have to find the right good one. Good luck dear!! :happy:
  • Whalers81
    Whalers81 Posts: 14 Member
    I was with someone for 12 years before he cheated on me... he said it had nothing to do with my weight, but I will always believe it did. He made one too many comments over the years for me not to know it was an issue with him. Maybe I would have believed him if the person he cheated with wasn't much, much thinner/prettier than me.
  • KrissyRawrz
    KrissyRawrz Posts: 342 Member
    I'm not sure if I'm allowed to swear on here but that vile person disgusts me! *hugs*
    As someone else mentioned it's a bad reflection on him, not of you. Never feel like you have to change for someone else, only ever do it for yourself. If you're happy with the way you are don't let someone as horrible as that make you change yourself.

    There's plenty of people who will love and support you for who you are. If he can't, then that's his loss x

    Thank you love, I am definitely changing for myself :) congrats on your amazing success btw and keep it up! You look WONDERFUL :)

    Awww that's so sweet thank you!
  • tayleigh4
    tayleigh4 Posts: 90 Member
    I'm sorry to hear that - he sounds like a bully. I was bullied by an ex for my weight, he would constantly call me fat even though he was 2 stone heavier than me!! I was overweight but certainly not fat. Ironically his constant bullying and putting me down caused me to gain almost 3 stone.

    I know you probably don't want to hear this right now, or believe it, but you're better off without him x

    Thank you, I'm so sorry you were bullied also. It is not fun, don't ever let a man talk to you like that again!
  • tayleigh4
    tayleigh4 Posts: 90 Member
    I got dumped because of my weight when I was about 308 but you know what that gave me all the motivation I needed to start my journey currently 213 and only looking forward ^_^

    http://i.imgur.com/Ecf3GCl.gif <- teehee

    I'm sorry to hear that ): I'm so proud of you, almost 100 pounds!! WOW.
    Lol I know right! It has given me SO much motivation to be the best person I can be. Nice GIF btw! ha.
  • tayleigh4
    tayleigh4 Posts: 90 Member
    If you were already heavy when you started the relationship and then 7 months later he dumps you for it, I'd say he was just looking for an excuse to end it. Your weight probably had little or nothing to do with the dumping, unless you gained all the weight in that 7 month period. A fast, extreme weight gain with no end in sight could have scared him off. Either way, you're better off without him. He wasn't right for you. :flowerforyou:

    You may be right, that probably was an excuse. I was mainly the same weight through our whole relationship. I am better off without him, but he'll miss me one day when I get to my goal weight :)
  • tayleigh4
    tayleigh4 Posts: 90 Member
    Yep. I was too fat to ride his motorcycle with him. So he found someone who wasn't... and was waayyy younger... then pregnant. Needless to say, good riddance. But my weight loss is for me, as yours should be. I know there are good ones out there, you just have to find the right good one. Good luck dear!! :happy:

    Wow.. That's so mean. Keep it up and never give up on your goals :) this journey is definitely for me! There are some great ones out there :) good luck to you too! Xo.
  • tayleigh4
    tayleigh4 Posts: 90 Member
    I was with someone for 12 years before he cheated on me... he said it had nothing to do with my weight, but I will always believe it did. He made one too many comments over the years for me not to know it was an issue with him. Maybe I would have believed him if the person he cheated with wasn't much, much thinner/prettier than me.

    That is so sad, 12 years together and he cheated on you. NO ONE deserves that. You deserve so much better and I hope you have/find a wonderful man who will love you for you and who would never think twice about another woman.
  • CaitySins
    CaitySins Posts: 57 Member
    I haven't, but I haven't been in a lot of relationships either. My boyfriend supports my weight lost, reminds me to weigh in/check my calories and supports my working out while telling me he still loves me no matter what my shape or size.

    But still, forget that guy. If he's going to use crap like that to end a relationship, he's not worth the time and doesn't deserve you. Congratulations on your weight loss (:
  • Marbella29660
    Marbella29660 Posts: 71 Member
    I haven't read all the replies but I'll say this. At least he was honest, told you what he thought and moved on. So you can now do the same. There will be many ways to look at this, but for me he told you straight and there's some value in that. Just do what makes you happy! Oh and no, that's never happened to me (so what do I know eh).
  • sassyjae21
    sassyjae21 Posts: 1,217 Member
    I have mix feelings about this.

    I'm sure you do.

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • newdaydawning79
    newdaydawning79 Posts: 1,503 Member
    You are absolutely gorgeous! He is a blind troll, it's as simple as that.

    My fiancee has seen me gain more weight than I care to admit in the time we've been together. She still loves me for me and for my heart. I AM trying to lose weight but that's solely for me and my health goals (to NOT need the medications my parents have been on pretty much my whole life).

    Good luck sweetheart! :flowerforyou:
  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
    My fiance many years ago, cheated on me with a married woman we had both just met at a car show. He never told me to my face but I'd read some of his messages to her, fat shaming me and discussing the details of their affairs.... =/

    He wanted to stay with me because the affair with the married woman was "just a fling", and I was the only one working and paying rent, bills, his cellphone bill etc... I was basically his meal ticket. He had no love left for me. He just needed my resources. D*mn straight I broke up with him. It was so hard to do too, after years of thinking you know a person...introducing them to your family and friends, your church etc...

    To make it worse the woman he cheated on me with had the audacity to send me nasty text messages about how she "would've told me what they were doing to my face but was afraid i'd eat her (oink oink)" !! All kinds of nasty messages..

    So what did I do? I found her husband (who was out of town on a business trip while she's driving around his mustang and cheating on him) on facebook, sent him a detailed message about what happened. I sent him logs and screen caps of their conversations too.

    Few days later the woman blows up my phone with texts again. Death threats for messaging her husband, saying she's going to "throw my fat *** in a wood chipper" and she knows where I work etc..

    She actually did end up coming to my job. Thankfully it was after we were closed and I was walking through the parking lot to my car. I guess it could've turned out a lot worse than it did. She could've had a gun or knife, could've brought a gang of people to beat me up etc. But it was just her, she attacked me. I dropped her like a sack of potatoes, twisted her arm behind her back at sat on it until the police got there. So in the end she was left with a divorce and a criminal record.

    jajajajajaja this is the best story. I did something similar although not quite as lively as your story when my fiance's ex would not leave him alone despite her recent engagement. I found out where he worked, found his email, and sent him everything she had sent.

    She never bothered us again.
  • tallgirlshelley
    tallgirlshelley Posts: 108 Member
    Many times. But no poor soul has had the cajunas to actually say that to me. I'm a big girl. I always have been. In my experience, most guys think they deserve a gorgeous, petite bombshell with big tatas. No matter if they're old and balding, gut hanging over their belts or living in their parents' basement. I keep hoping the men I meet will have matured with age a bit and be a little more realistic about claiming the "arm candy" they deserve. But, sadly no. Don't get me wrong. I'm a big fan of the dudes. I love men! I just think a lot of them just have unrealistic expectations. Your ex sounds like a horse's *kitten* and I'm glad you are done with him. Just don't let your guard down. Dating is a ***** and only gets worse with age. People are too eager to push their own baggage aside and "blame" it on someone else. Make sure you are happy with you before you go looking :)
  • tayleigh4
    tayleigh4 Posts: 90 Member
    I haven't, but I haven't been in a lot of relationships either. My boyfriend supports my weight lost, reminds me to weigh in/check my calories and supports my working out while telling me he still loves me no matter what my shape or size.

    But still, forget that guy. If he's going to use crap like that to end a relationship, he's not worth the time and doesn't deserve you. Congratulations on your weight loss (:

    Thank you, I'm so happy you have a bf who supports you! Keep it up :)
This discussion has been closed.