Has anyone ever been dumped because of their weight?
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I haven't read all the replies but I'll say this. At least he was honest, told you what he thought and moved on. So you can now do the same. There will be many ways to look at this, but for me he told you straight and there's some value in that. Just do what makes you happy! Oh and no, that's never happened to me (so what do I know eh).
I am moving on, I'm not dwelling on the past. He gave me a wake-up call and our breakup was a blessing in disguise. I will do what makes me happy, thank you!
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You are absolutely gorgeous! He is a blind troll, it's as simple as that.
My fiancee has seen me gain more weight than I care to admit in the time we've been together. She still loves me for me and for my heart. I AM trying to lose weight but that's solely for me and my health goals (to NOT need the medications my parents have been on pretty much my whole life).
Good luck sweetheart! :flowerforyou:
Thank you hun. That's amazing, he definitely loves you for exactly who you are! And you're beautiful. Keep trying and never give up, we can do this and achieve our goals!!) thank you and good luck to you!! 0 -
Many times. But no poor soul has had the cajunas to actually say that to me. I'm a big girl. I always have been. In my experience, most guys think they deserve a gorgeous, petite bombshell with big tatas. No matter if they're old and balding, gut hanging over their belts or living in their parents' basement. I keep hoping the men I meet will have matured with age a bit and be a little more realistic about claiming the "arm candy" they deserve. But, sadly no. Don't get me wrong. I'm a big fan of the dudes. I love men! I just think a lot of them just have unrealistic expectations. Your ex sounds like a horse's *kitten* and I'm glad you are done with him. Just don't let your guard down. Dating is a ***** and only gets worse with age. People are too eager to push their own baggage aside and "blame" it on someone else. Make sure you are happy with you before you go looking
I totally agree. A LOT of men have such unrealistic expectations. I love men too but you're so right, they are too shallow sometimes. I will stay positive and become a better me thank you beautiful! 0 -
i don't think he was honest. if her weight was a problem, why would he have hooked up with her in the first place?
sounds like he was just ready to move on, and found a way to blame someone else.He's a heel and a douche but he was honest and OMG that SUCKS but at least he didn't lie to you about why.0 -
I am currently working through something similar, my husband of 22 years has just told me he isn't attracted to me because of my weight. He still loves me and doesn't want us to separate but will not touch me again until I have lost it. I have lost 12 kg in 5 weeks and have about another 25 to go.
There has been lots and lots of tears, and he hates himself for saying it, but it's the living with someone who shows no affection which is pretty heartbreaking. He says tough love is the only way to go, because he's terrified that I will stop trying if I don't think he's serious.
So yes, I am losing weight for me, but equally losing weight to keep my family together is just as important. Unfortunately my self esteem is shot!0 -
2 weeks ago, my boyfriend of 7 months broke up with me because I am 'too fat for him.' He is 170 pounds and 6'3. I WAS 192.2 pounds and 5'3. Right now I'm 174.4 pounds. He said that for the past few months he lost all attraction towards me, he said I was too fat and I need to lose weight. Has anyone else ever been broken up with because their partner wasn't attracted to them/because of their weight? It is a horrible feeling, but he opened my eyes on my health.
Don't look back honey. You don't need that kind of person in your life, to drag you down and stomp on your self belief.
Look ahead, better times are on their way, and better people too. Just stay focused on your health and wellness, the rest will flow from there. 0 -
I am currently working through something similar, my husband of 22 years has just told me he isn't attracted to me because of my weight. He still loves me and doesn't want us to separate but will not touch me again until I have lost it. I have lost 12 kg in 5 weeks and have about another 25 to go.
There has been lots and lots of tears, and he hates himself for saying it, but it's the living with someone who shows no affection which is pretty heartbreaking. He says tough love is the only way to go, because he's terrified that I will stop trying if I don't think he's serious.
So yes, I am losing weight for me, but equally losing weight to keep my family together is just as important. Unfortunately my self esteem is shot!
He sounds like a controlling bully.
Don't lose weight to become the person he wants you to be.
Lose weight if you want to. There is nothing else that works, ultimately.0 -
My fiance many years ago, cheated on me with a married woman we had both just met at a car show. He never told me to my face but I'd read some of his messages to her, fat shaming me and discussing the details of their affairs.... =/
He wanted to stay with me because the affair with the married woman was "just a fling", and I was the only one working and paying rent, bills, his cellphone bill etc... I was basically his meal ticket. He had no love left for me. He just needed my resources. D*mn straight I broke up with him. It was so hard to do too, after years of thinking you know a person...introducing them to your family and friends, your church etc...
To make it worse the woman he cheated on me with had the audacity to send me nasty text messages about how she "would've told me what they were doing to my face but was afraid i'd eat her (oink oink)" !! All kinds of nasty messages..
So what did I do? I found her husband (who was out of town on a business trip while she's driving around his mustang and cheating on him) on facebook, sent him a detailed message about what happened. I sent him logs and screen caps of their conversations too.
Few days later the woman blows up my phone with texts again. Death threats for messaging her husband, saying she's going to "throw my fat *** in a wood chipper" and she knows where I work etc..
She actually did end up coming to my job. Thankfully it was after we were closed and I was walking through the parking lot to my car. I guess it could've turned out a lot worse than it did. She could've had a gun or knife, could've brought a gang of people to beat me up etc. But it was just her, she attacked me. I dropped her like a sack of potatoes, twisted her arm behind her back at sat on it until the police got there. So in the end she was left with a divorce and a criminal record.
Wow....:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
That made me laugh.....
What did she expect???
I mean you don't go poking a hornets nest0 -
Why does a person have to be shallow and immature because they want to be physically attracted to a person they may spend the rest of their life with? I work hard everyday in the gym so I can be what turns my wife on physically. When she sees a good looking guy on TV or in a magazine with his shirt off, I want her to think of me and know she already has that.0
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Why does a person have to be shallow and immature because they want to be physically attracted to a person they may spend the rest of their life with? I work hard everyday in the gym so I can be what turns my wife on physically. When she sees a good looking guy on TV or in a magazine with his shirt off, I want her to think of me and know she already has that.
Nice post.0 -
I agree that it was just an excuse... the issues lay with him, not your weight.
When my ex broke up with me, one of the things he brought up that he said was a major issue for him about me was that I had let myself go, I was too big and he just didnt find that attractive. I was a size 4 and maybe 5lbs more than I was when we first started dating. We'd been together over 3 years.
I totally spiraled out of control and then I really did gain a lot of weight, but turns out, breaking up with me had nothing to do with anything wrong with me, hed been seeing several other women behind my back, and just needed an out because he was having more fun with that and just wanted to be single again. I guess making me feel horrible about myself seemed like a good out, I have no idea.
But I wish I knew then what I know now, I looked great then, and even though Im now a 12/14, I feel more confident about my body now than he made me feel back then. But anyway yeah, just sounds to me like hes using an excuse, any excuse, because he has other motives, and felt he had to think of something...anything...to say as a reason to end the relationship. But like I said, the issue is with him, not you or your weight, cause he was fine with it all that time, and now its an issue? Nope! Not likely.0 -
I've never been dumped because of it...but my ex did tell me the reason he cheated on me was that I was too fat. So it was my fault he cheated, because he couldn't get what he needed at home. You're better off with out him, you should find a guy that likes you for you, and isn't overly concerned about your weight.0
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I've never been dumped because of it...but my ex did tell me the reason he cheated on me was that I was too fat. So it was my fault he cheated, because he couldn't get what he needed at home. You're better off with out him, you should find a guy that likes you for you, and isn't overly concerned about your weight.
Just wow. I don't understand how people do this.0 -
I had guy tell me (we were on a blinddate) once a long time ago that I'd be really pretty if I lost some weight... I told him he'd be really handsome if he got rid of the dead cat he wore on his head and grew some hair.
There was NOT a second date.2 -
Why does a person have to be shallow and immature because they want to be physically attracted to a person they may spend the rest of their life with? I work hard everyday in the gym so I can be what turns my wife on physically. When she sees a good looking guy on TV or in a magazine with his shirt off, I want her to think of me and know she already has that.
I thought the same thing.....
But w/ my ex, didn't seem to matter
She couldn't enjoy it...
She was more upset with how I ate, when I ate and that my waist was smaller than hers.....
So go figure.....
Kinda frustrating for me....it was like "Damn, can't you just say 'Wow!! You look great'"?
I mean I would compliment her if she came down the stairs looking nice and all dressed up......she wnated to hear it.
But for some reason I didn't???0 -
I had guy tell me (we were on a blinddate) once a long time ago that I'd be really pretty if I lost some weight... I told him he'd be really handsome if he got rid of the dead cat he wore on his head and grew some hair.
There was NOT a second date.
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
Women are so feisty.....0 -
Why does a person have to be shallow and immature because they want to be physically attracted to a person they may spend the rest of their life with? I work hard everyday in the gym so I can be what turns my wife on physically. When she sees a good looking guy on TV or in a magazine with his shirt off, I want her to think of me and know she already has that.
I thought the same thing.....
But w/ my ex, didn't seem to matter
She couldn't enjoy it...
She was more upset with how I ate, when I ate and that my waist was smaller than hers.....
So go figure.....
Kinda frustrating for me....it was like "Damn, can't you just say 'Wow!! You look great'"?
I mean I would compliment her if she came down the stairs looking nice and all dressed up......she wnated to hear it.
But for some reason I didn't???
That sucks man. A lack of appreciation when you are putting in hard work is worse IMO than a person losing physical attraction in a case of someone letting go and not caring. Before I get all the butthurt people. I'm not saying the OP's case is one of letting go. I'm using letting go as a general term.0 -
2 weeks ago, my boyfriend of 7 months broke up with me because I am 'too fat for him.' He is 170 pounds and 6'3. I WAS 192.2 pounds and 5'3. Right now I'm 174.4 pounds. He said that for the past few months he lost all attraction towards me, he said I was too fat and I need to lose weight. Has anyone else ever been broken up with because their partner wasn't attracted to them/because of their weight? It is a horrible feeling, but he opened my eyes on my health.
Hello fellow CTer.
The guy is a scrub. It is good to be attracted to someone physically but to just give up on someone and say that they are too fat is immature. If he is 6'3 and 170 pounds then maybe he should start lifting because he is a pencil.0 -
nope-i dumped him after being threatened for 10 years that he would leave me if i gained weight.
best loss ever!0 -
No, this has never happened to me, no matter my weight.
I guess I should feel good that I date men who know a good woman when they see one.
Sorry that happened to you. Best of luck with bettering your health.0 -
Yes my spouse of 17 yrs. left me because I had gained weight. I look better now than I did when we met & he tried once to come back. So sorry not happening. LOL0
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I haven't read all the replies but I'll say this. At least he was honest, told you what he thought and moved on. So you can now do the same. There will be many ways to look at this, but for me he told you straight and there's some value in that. Just do what makes you happy! Oh and no, that's never happened to me (so what do I know eh).
I am moving on, I'm not dwelling on the past. He gave me a wake-up call and our breakup was a blessing in disguise. I will do what makes me happy, thank you!
Good for you!! I was going to say that you are better off without someone shallow!! When my boyfriend and I starting dating he was a little heavier than me but not by much. now I am A lot heavier than him but he never mentions it! he's very supportive because he wants me to be healthy and knows I would feel a lot better. I'm really lucky and grateful for that. I hope you find someone who deserves you 0 -
Yes my spouse of 17 yrs. left me because I had gained weight. I look better now than I did when we met & he tried once to come back. So sorry not happening. LOL
Good for you!!0 -
Never had someone leave because of my weight...
I did have my (ex) fiance leave me and our daughter,after being together for 3 years, because I was not good enough for God.... God told him. They are homeboys and they talked about it. *nods* Some bull like that.0 -
Why does a person have to be shallow and immature because they want to be physically attracted to a person they may spend the rest of their life with? I work hard everyday in the gym so I can be what turns my wife on physically. When she sees a good looking guy on TV or in a magazine with his shirt off, I want her to think of me and know she already has that.
I thought the same thing.....
But w/ my ex, didn't seem to matter
She couldn't enjoy it...
She was more upset with how I ate, when I ate and that my waist was smaller than hers.....
So go figure.....
Kinda frustrating for me....it was like "Damn, can't you just say 'Wow!! You look great'"?
I mean I would compliment her if she came down the stairs looking nice and all dressed up......she wnated to hear it.
But for some reason I didn't???
That sucks man. A lack of appreciation when you are putting in hard work is worse IMO than a person losing physical attraction in a case of someone letting go and not caring. Before I get all the butthurt people. I'm not saying the OP's case is one of letting go. I'm using letting go as a general term.
All good.
Moving on.0 -
When I was 20, I got into my first serious relationship. We were together for 6 months, and were living together. One night, I slept over at my parents, and the next day when I got home he told me he had cheated on me with a co-worker of his. He was the first guy I had slept with, so it completely broke my heart. But it hurt even worse when he told me that he couldn't handle how big I was.
It hurt worse than anything, but once I was out of the relationship, my life changed for the better. He messaged me on facebook a couple of months ago, and told me that he regretted breaking up with me because I was the best thing to ever happen to him. I laughed, because I hadn't even thought about him in so long.
Now, I'm in an amazing relationship, with someone who appreciates me for everything I am and everything I am not, and I can't imagine being happier. Sometimes, things like this need to happen, in order for us to realize our own worth. 0 -
When I was 20, I got into my first serious relationship. We were together for 6 months, and were living together. One night, I slept over at my parents, and the next day when I got home he told me he had cheated on me with a co-worker of his. He was the first guy I had slept with, so it completely broke my heart. But it hurt even worse when he told me that he couldn't handle how big I was.
It hurt worse than anything, but once I was out of the relationship, my life changed for the better. He messaged me on facebook a couple of months ago, and told me that he regretted breaking up with me because I was the best thing to ever happen to him. I laughed, because I hadn't even thought about him in so long.
Now, I'm in an amazing relationship, with someone who appreciates me for everything I am and everything I am not, and I can't imagine being happier. Sometimes, things like this need to happen, in order for us to realize our own worth.
well as much as that sucks.
You can be grateful of the fact he told you point blank.....
So you could move on and find something better for you.
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2 weeks ago, my boyfriend of 7 months broke up with me because I am 'too fat for him.' He is 170 pounds and 6'3. I WAS 192.2 pounds and 5'3. Right now I'm 174.4 pounds. He said that for the past few months he lost all attraction towards me, he said I was too fat and I need to lose weight. Has anyone else ever been broken up with because their partner wasn't attracted to them/because of their weight? It is a horrible feeling, but he opened my eyes on my health.
Sounds to me like you just lost a lot more weight. About 170 lbs of dead weight. I've never been dumped for being overweight, at one point I was 260 lbs and still hit on by what I thought were very attractive men. He said it has been "months" that he was no longer attracted to you...yet after you lost 20 lbs he decided to dump you? I call BS.1 -
2 weeks ago, my boyfriend of 7 months broke up with me because I am 'too fat for him.' He is 170 pounds and 6'3. I WAS 192.2 pounds and 5'3. Right now I'm 174.4 pounds. He said that for the past few months he lost all attraction towards me, he said I was too fat and I need to lose weight. Has anyone else ever been broken up with because their partner wasn't attracted to them/because of their weight? It is a horrible feeling, but he opened my eyes on my health.
Sorry to hear what happened. If your goal is to lose weight then just use this experience as motivation to keep pushing yourself to do better. I'm sure everything will work out just fine for you.0 -
Nope. I only got fat after getting married, was only fat for about a year, then turned it around. Not long enough for husbando to decide that cushin wasn't worth pushin'. :laugh:0
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