MFP has really changed

kgeyser

Well, it's pretty clear I will be sticking to the GROUPS and not using the forums.... Mean people suck!!

Oh no, please, we'll miss you….wait, no, we won't, because this was your first post, which means in the year you've had an account here you've never taken a moment to offer advice or support to anyone.

_Zardoz_

Well, it's pretty clear I will be sticking to the GROUPS and not using the forums.... Mean people suck!!

Well that's your choice but if you actually look at what these mean people are saying you will find that they are the ones that have lost a lot weight and kept it off and that those who keep starting the 'mean people' threads are the ones who keep asking for help but then get all upset when the advice doesn't agree with them. Read what the mean people say and you may come to the conclusion they're not actually mean they just don't pander to people. Would you rather someone told you that you were always right or that they gave you good solid advice?

You can right off all that experience and help if you wish but without the mean people MFP wouldn't be the very useful resource it is and you'd be just cutting your nose off to spite your face (but that seems to happen here a lot)

Good luck and I'm off to hang out with the mean people

jlrs2015

I'm not telling anyone not to give their opinion. That's part of the reason we are all here...the help of others. I'm just saying be kind about it. I've read several post and truly felt bad for the OP. It's unnecessary to be rude when giving an opinion. We all should keep our fat hearts not our fat *kitten* (shout out to Fat Amy).
PS...for those of you who missed the point of my post and want to know why I said three years and and my Joined date is Sept 2014 it's because I took a break and came back. Glad you caught that one because that was the point I was trying to make after all. :happy:

levitateme

People are just way too sensitive.

I love "these forums were created to be ______" posts. Did you create this site? These forums are meant for discussion. We can't dictate what type of responses we get to our questions. My having a differing opinion from you or someone else doesn't make me "mean" or "rude."

The OP of the heavy/light cleaning thread got super defensive for seriously NO REASON. I... just can't even... I just can't anymore with these threads. :sad:

Zerodette

For the most part, I think things are fine here. However, I've been using Internet forums regularly for 15 years-- half my life. This forum is TAME. I think the nature of this site may attract more people who aren't as web-forum savvy. Like an OP earlier who honestly mixed up the point of a forum post and a blog post, then got offended when a discussion sprung up on her forum post. Not saying that all of the easily offended are web-clueless, but it could be one aspect of it.

MizTerry

rachelrb85

That being said, this place has always been and probably always will be like a cliche movie high school. Lots of popular, beautiful people being popular and beautiful.

Only difference is, most of them are amazing, empathetic, and courteous individuals who are simply misunderstood because they tell the whole, honest truth.

nilbogger

BTW, you should check out the Weight Watchers forums. Those are some stone-cold broads.

Sparkpeople is a little more sunshine and rainbows, but there's still some tough love there.

srslybritt

That being said, this place has always been and probably always will be like a cliche movie high school. Lots of popular, beautiful people being popular and beautiful.

Only difference is, most of them are amazing, empathetic, and courteous individuals who are simply misunderstood because they tell the whole, honest truth.

SunofaBeach14

When I have nothing to add except a snarky comment I remember this:

Does she have any quotes about irony?

How many calories does heavy irony burn?

gypsy_spirit

Same as it ever was... same as it ever was....

SarahRuthRuns

I actually used to run an internet forum with about 900ish users. In the beginning, nobody knows each other and everyone is, for the most part, reasonably polite. They are on their best behavior while they feel things out. Once people start to get to know each other they tend to loosen up a bit and form cliques, in a sense. Once this happens (and it has happened here, I can see it), newbies or less active users start to feel out of the loop. And when it is obvious that a lot of the people know each other and are bouncing snarky remarks off each other, or sharing inside jokes, others start to feel like outsiders and take is as "mean".

Just my opinion from 3 years of owning and moderating a very active forum.

jlrs2015

So I'm relatively new to MFP (I made an account a while ago but didn't really use it), but I've seen mostly supportive threads in my short time here. That being said, if a user was going to log "dusting the mantle" for exercise (as someone suggested), there's a respectful way to be like, hey that's not going to be productive for you, and saying, what are you, an idiot?? I haven't seen that thread myself, but if you have a disagreement, it's fine to express it, but there's no good reason to do so in a mean way. If someone knows less than you, why not try to help them instead of making them feel stupid for it?

THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

k8blujay2

Hear, hear, OP!!

I am relatively new to the site, but I have not encountered such uncivility since Jr. High School. So many seem to revel in being called mean. They defend their right to be mean and claim they are just "helping" or they were driven to it lesser minds.

I have also noticed Jr. High type "cliques". One person will post something snarky or rude and suddenly a bunch of others start in. Often the same group. I assume these are from their 'friends' list. Because if a group is rude, then it's not really rude, right?

It's so juvenile and silly.

I guess I will have to say this again... this place is unicorns and rainbow glitter compared to the likes of Babycenter, the Knot, and Sodahead... among many others, those are just the places I have been myself... so please... join another forum and then comeback and see how uncivil this place is... Hell, there was a time where even NEOPETS was worse than this place has ever been... yes, a game website.

PRMinx

I'm not telling anyone not to give their opinion. That's part of the reason we are all here...the help of others. I'm just saying be kind about it. I've read several post and truly felt bad for the OP. It's unnecessary to be rude when giving an opinion. We all should keep our fat hearts not our fat *kitten* (shout out to Fat Amy).
PS...for those of you who missed the point of my post and want to know why I said three years and and my Joined date is Sept 2014 it's because I took a break and came back. Glad you caught that one because that was the point I was trying to make after all. :happy:

Can you please give us a specific example from the thread that you think is rude and mean? Maybe we can sort out where the poster was coming from because, honestly, nothing in that thread popped up as mean to me. The OP got a bit defensive and people reacted to it.

rachelrb85

Well, it's pretty clear I will be sticking to the GROUPS and not using the forums.... Mean people suck!!

These "mean people" will offer you unbiased knowledge on questions that matter and might make a difference to your weight loss and success. They've been around and know a thing or two. So, your loss. Or un-loss once you hit a plateau but don't trust the meanies to ask a question and get some help.

This! I surround myself with the people that are constantly labelled as mean for giving sound and unbiased advice... They are honestly the sweetest and most caring group of people on here... they aren't fake and won't validate people's crap... having a low BS tolerance does not make people mean...

You want mean, join a mommy forum and discuss whether or not you should vaccinate your kid...

Or how to use or supplement with forumla since BF'ing just isn't working out

srslybritt

This site doesn't suck because of the group of people that sprinkle their knowledge where it needs to be sprinkled, it's ruined by people who try too hard to take everything personally. People who want to find something to complain about and find a way to be upset.

THIS.

I spent a while actually crafting a response in another thread a while back, making sure I used "I/me/my/mine" and what I found solved MY problem, and "YMMV" and all that PC stuff, only to be immediately responded to by someone who thought I was telling them what the hell to do.

Jesus, take things personally much?

I just throw up my hands and walk away after that.

And lots of people do that way too often because they don't see the point.

I keep offering my opinions, experiences, and advice because I hope someone reading my posts but not posting will maybe take them to heart and try them out. I don't necessarily post just for the OP, my friends, or anyone else, but I'm also posting for someone who has a question about something that they don't know how or are too afraid to ask. It's almost never because of one specific person that I offer advice.

nursedb

I like turtles

k8blujay2

Well, it's pretty clear I will be sticking to the GROUPS and not using the forums.... Mean people suck!!

These "mean people" will offer you unbiased knowledge on questions that matter and might make a difference to your weight loss and success. They've been around and know a thing or two. So, your loss. Or un-loss once you hit a plateau but don't trust the meanies to ask a question and get some help.

This! I surround myself with the people that are constantly labelled as mean for giving sound and unbiased advice... They are honestly the sweetest and most caring group of people on here... they aren't fake and won't validate people's crap... having a low BS tolerance does not make people mean...

You want mean, join a mommy forum and discuss whether or not you should vaccinate your kid...

Or how to use or supplement with forumla since BF'ing just isn't working out

Oh yeah! I forgot that one!

_Waffle_

Keep logging cleaning and food preparation as a valid a calorie burning exercise if you want to. Don't listen to them OP. You can do it.


Shun the non-believer. Shuuuuuuuun.