Free Therapy: Another Open Letter!

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  • FitJoani
    FitJoani Posts: 2,173 Member
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    Dear Former Unhealthy me(and everyone elses unhealthy evil twin)
    I am so glad you are no longer a part of me. I am so glad I lost all of you on a gym floor. I am so glad I dont have to take those blood pressure meds anymore. I am so glad I overcame and chose life. I am so glad I saw the err in my ways and decided to lace up ands satrt running again. I will never ever miss getting called a fat girl, or getting belittled cause i am not good enough or thin enough. I am glad that the tthis is the only time it is ok to say losing is what winners do. I am glad I turned to the biggest loser that october day 2 years ago(it changed my life). I am glad I went to that health fair that one october day 2 years ago. I am glad I ran way from you and I am glad to say I will never go backl!!!!
  • plantlady99
    plantlady99 Posts: 1,338 Member
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    Did somebody say cow???

    7076.gif

    How 'bout a cow who does a mean pole dance?

    I was eating a salad while reading and almost lost it.

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,081 Member
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    :noway:
  • Phoenix_Rising
    Phoenix_Rising Posts: 11,417 Member
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    Dear Daughter Natalie,

    Farting in public isn't really funny. Can't really blame it on the dog then, can we?

    Put a cork in it,

    Your mother.

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: I feel this letter in my future...
  • GTOgirl1969
    GTOgirl1969 Posts: 2,527 Member
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    Dear Neighborhood Punk with the $300 car and the $3000 stereo,

    OK, I get it. Your stereo is louder and more bass-heavy than anyone else's. I was a teenager once, and I still like to bump the jams with the best of them.

    BUT NOT AT 7 AM!!!!!

    Hit the mute button on that thing,

    Your (tired) neighbor.
  • Losing_It
    Losing_It Posts: 3,271 Member
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    Dear Mother Nature,

    Ok..I love snow! It's great..it's wonderful...it's all white & fluffy!! We love to get out and play in the snow then come in for some homemade hot chocolate. But I must say... ENOUGH ALREADY! We've been snowed in all week...our yard is a mess from broken limbs and trees down from all the ice.

    I have Spring fever 3 months early....so, umm..yeah...go away until next Winter!

    Frozen in Ohio
    aka--Desperately Seeking Sunshine
  • sunflower8926
    sunflower8926 Posts: 485 Member
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    Dear chest muscles,

    Ouch! I mean really! It was only a couple of pushups for cryin out loud! Suck it up already!
    Sincerely,
    The rest of your body which seems to have handled the video just fine.
  • Phoenix_Rising
    Phoenix_Rising Posts: 11,417 Member
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    Dear Building Heater-Nazis:

    I do not care if fire code prohibits use of personal heaters. Until you turn up the heat to a REASONABLE level in this building, I will continue to turn on my heater once I've exhausted my other options, which include putting on my winter jacket and placing a blanket across my lap.

    I.
    Am.
    Cold.
    Fix.
    It.


    Signed,
    Frosty the Analyst
  • 1Corinthians13
    1Corinthians13 Posts: 5,296 Member
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    This is a great thread!!!
    _____________________

    Dear Cheater,

    I realize maybe for some people, the promise of sex from the same person for the rest of your life isn't that exciting. Maybe you're one of those people. But if you are, I really wish you just would never have chased me with that beautiful engagement ring. And I'd like to know how you sleep at night after pulling all financial support and knowing how hard it is to pay all of my bills in this area of the country.

    Oh yeah...you sleep with her.

    Well she can have you. I just hope she realizes that you are a cheater and liar - and that you were sleeping with me the whole time you were sleeping with her. What's that? She doesn't know? You LIED to her? Imagine that...I think I have another letter to write.

    Sincerely,
    Never Again

    _________________________________

    Dear Person who does not deserve to be called a woman,

    I think you should ask your new boyfriend if he's been telling you the whole truth this whole time.

    That is all.

    Signed,
    More of a Woman than You'll Ever Be
  • jackeh
    jackeh Posts: 1,515 Member
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    Dear body,

    It has been 3 long months we have been sitting on this plateau together... And I am still sitting here trying to convince you that NO there will be no famine anytime soon... just let the damn weight go already!!! I feed you well I have even upped your calories and gotten a gym pass in hopes of messing you up a little... but no you continue to hoard the fat.... don't get me wrong I am happy to see less celulite on my hiney and bigger muscles on my arms... and am thrilled that you have let me drop 0.2 pounds this week... but common 0.2 pounds in 3 months? can you do better than that? We are in this together and we have sooo much to prove!! I am not giving up on you!!! we can do this!!!!

    your overweight partner
    jackie
  • havingitall
    havingitall Posts: 3,728 Member
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    Dear Mom,

    I am so sorry for the attitude I gave you when I was a teenager. I realize now that you were probably right and I was probably wrong. I have come to these realizations now because of my 16 year old daughter and I am pretty sure she is wrong. Why you din't beat the ever loving tar out of me is beyond me. You were a very tolerant woman.

    I also understand why you dyed you hair so often, it was because of me! I am trying to see if I can claim hair dye on my income tax.

    Love Vicky



    Dear Saggy Boobs

    Why are you always looking down? It isn't all that bad and my belly button doesn't look that great

    Vicky
  • Marla64
    Marla64 Posts: 23,120 Member
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    Oh....how I have waited for this thread to reappear......ahem....

    Dear Curious,

    It is so very heartwarming that you are so concerned about the number of children I have, and to receive the numerous blessings... as in, "God bless you, better than you than me." I heartily agree.

    Just for your edification....yes, I really do have nine children. Yes, they're all mine. Yes, I do have television. Yes, I do know what causes pregnancy. And, yes, I actually do get out once in a while. Yes, holidays are fun. No, I didn't have twins. No, I didn't plan to have all the children, but God planned it. And no, I don't know if I'm done yet....and, no, I'm not a saint....far from it. Yes, dinnertime is interesting. Yes, the house is noisy. Yes, I have lots of laundry....but equal amounts of joy.

    I trust you don't mean to be quite so impolite when you do your Soupy Sales spit take when you hear of my large clan, but it is somewhat rude just the same. I'm just a God fearing woman who, along with the Mister, decided to honor God by giving him this control of our lives. Yes, I realize you don't see such large families anymore, but personally I find that rather sad.

    Next time, when you hear of someone like me...for there are still a few of us left....simply smile and wish us well....or as Thumper said, "If you can't say something nice, don't say nothin' at all."
  • 1Corinthians13
    1Corinthians13 Posts: 5,296 Member
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    Dear Mom,

    I am so sorry for the attitude I gave you when I was a teenager. I realize now that you were probably right and I was probably wrong. I have come to these realizations now because of my 16 year old daughter and I am pretty sure she is wrong. Why you din't beat the ever loving tar out of me is beyond me. You were a very tolerant woman.

    I also understand why you dyed you hair so often, it was because of me! I am trying to see if I can claim hair dye on my income tax.

    Love Vicky



    Dear Saggy Boobs

    Why are you always looking down? It isn't all that bad and my belly button doesn't look that great

    Vicky

    I love these! I don't have the boob problem yet. But my hair...I found two silver hairs! But I'm always dying my hair anyway. :smile:
  • Fitness_Chick
    Fitness_Chick Posts: 6,648 Member
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    Oh....how I have waited for this thread to reappear......ahem....

    Dear Curious,

    It is so very heartwarming that you are so concerned about the number of children I have, and to receive the numerous blessings... as in, "God bless you, better than you than me." I heartily agree.

    Just for your edification....yes, I really do have nine children. Yes, they're all mine. Yes, I do have television. Yes, I do know what causes pregnancy. And, yes, I actually do get out once in a while. Yes, holidays are fun. No, I didn't have twins. No, I didn't plan to have all the children, but God planned it. And no, I don't know if I'm done yet....and, no, I'm not a saint....far from it. Yes, dinnertime is interesting. Yes, the house is noisy. Yes, I have lots of laundry....but equal amounts of joy.

    I trust you don't mean to be quite so impolite when you do your Soupy Sales spit take when you hear of my large clan, but it is somewhat rude just the same. I'm just a God fearing woman who, along with the Mister, decided to honor God by giving him this control of our lives. Yes, I realize you don't see such large families anymore, but personally I find that rather sad.

    Next time, when you hear of someone like me...for there are still a few of us left....simply smile and wish us well....or as Thumper said, "If you can't say something nice, don't say nothin' at all."
    :noway: mean ppl suck:angry::noway:

    Marla:flowerforyou: :heart: :wink:
  • GTOgirl1969
    GTOgirl1969 Posts: 2,527 Member
    Options
    This is a great thread!!!
    _____________________

    Dear Cheater,

    I realize maybe for some people, the promise of sex from the same person for the rest of your life isn't that exciting. Maybe you're one of those people. But if you are, I really wish you just would never have chased me with that beautiful engagement ring. And I'd like to know how you sleep at night after pulling all financial support and knowing how hard it is to pay all of my bills in this area of the country.

    Oh yeah...you sleep with her.

    Well she can have you. I just hope she realizes that you are a cheater and liar - and that you were sleeping with me the whole time you were sleeping with her. What's that? She doesn't know? You LIED to her? Imagine that...I think I have another letter to write.

    Sincerely,
    Never Again

    _________________________________

    Dear Person who does not deserve to be called a woman,

    I think you should ask your new boyfriend if he's been telling you the whole truth this whole time.

    That is all.

    Signed,
    More of a Woman than You'll Ever Be


    Kickass! Can I borrow that one?
  • 1Corinthians13
    1Corinthians13 Posts: 5,296 Member
    Options
    This is a great thread!!!
    _____________________

    Dear Cheater,

    I realize maybe for some people, the promise of sex from the same person for the rest of your life isn't that exciting. Maybe you're one of those people. But if you are, I really wish you just would never have chased me with that beautiful engagement ring. And I'd like to know how you sleep at night after pulling all financial support and knowing how hard it is to pay all of my bills in this area of the country.

    Oh yeah...you sleep with her.

    Well she can have you. I just hope she realizes that you are a cheater and liar - and that you were sleeping with me the whole time you were sleeping with her. What's that? She doesn't know? You LIED to her? Imagine that...I think I have another letter to write.

    Sincerely,
    Never Again

    _________________________________

    Dear Person who does not deserve to be called a woman,

    I think you should ask your new boyfriend if he's been telling you the whole truth this whole time.

    That is all.

    Signed,
    More of a Woman than You'll Ever Be


    Kickass! Can I borrow that one?

    Thank you! And absolutely!
  • stillkristi
    stillkristi Posts: 1,135 Member
    Options
    This is a great thread!!!
    _____________________

    Dear Cheater,

    I realize maybe for some people, the promise of sex from the same person for the rest of your life isn't that exciting. Maybe you're one of those people. But if you are, I really wish you just would never have chased me with that beautiful engagement ring. And I'd like to know how you sleep at night after pulling all financial support and knowing how hard it is to pay all of my bills in this area of the country.

    Oh yeah...you sleep with her.

    Well she can have you. I just hope she realizes that you are a cheater and liar - and that you were sleeping with me the whole time you were sleeping with her. What's that? She doesn't know? You LIED to her? Imagine that...I think I have another letter to write.

    Sincerely,
    Never Again

    _________________________________

    Dear Person who does not deserve to be called a woman,

    I think you should ask your new boyfriend if he's been telling you the whole truth this whole time.

    That is all.

    Signed,
    More of a Woman than You'll Ever Be
  • stillkristi
    stillkristi Posts: 1,135 Member
    Options
    Ok, I can't seem to get the quote thing right. Either I try to put a quote in and I (or rather, my comments) wind up inside of it or I get the quote right, but there is no me in the post. Help!:huh:

    But seriously, 1 Corin - YOU GO GIRL!!!!!
  • havingitall
    havingitall Posts: 3,728 Member
    Options
    Dear Daughter Natalie,

    Farting in public isn't really funny. Can't really blame it on the dog then, can we?

    Put a cork in it,

    Your mother.

    Actually farting in public is funny ..especially the SBDs and you blame it on someone else. Or maybe that is just my childish mind again!
  • Fitness_Chick
    Fitness_Chick Posts: 6,648 Member
    Options
    Ok, I can't seem to get the quote thing right. Either I try to put a quote in and I (or rather, my comments) wind up inside of it or I get the quote right, but there is no me in the post. Help!:huh:

    But seriously, 1 Corin - YOU GO GIRL!!!!!

    Hey Kristi:flowerforyou:
    I do that too sometimes and it bugs me like crazy when I look back at my thread:tongue:

    What I find to eliminate that problem is post your response either just before the very first quote on the post you're replying to or after the very last one on the post. I find sometimes I don't scroll down quite far enough and type before the last one and get caught in it:blushing:

    Hope that helps:wink:

    FC:heart: