Men...... Grrrrrr

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  • d2footballJRC
    d2footballJRC Posts: 2,684 Member
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    3. I'm always suspicious of a guy who randomly says "I want to be in a relationship." Since when do men ever sit down with a woman and have THAT discussion? If you wanted to be in a relationship, we'd already be in a relationship. If you have to tell me that's what you want, you're up to something.

    That's not true. I chased my wife through hell and back to get her to date me.
  • iAMaPhoenix
    iAMaPhoenix Posts: 1,038 Member
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    I am going home and tell my wife I no longer want to be married to her skinny *kitten*, and I hate the way she smells, and she is a bad cook, and a horrible mother, who cannot drive...that way I ensure she will never binge eat.
  • d2footballJRC
    d2footballJRC Posts: 2,684 Member
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    I am going home and tell my wife I no longer want to be married to her skinny *kitten*, and I hate the way she smells, and she is a bad cook, and a horrible mother, who cannot drive...that way I ensure she will never binge eat.

    She might lose some weight fast though, in the form of a SO. ;-)
  • ItsCasey
    ItsCasey Posts: 4,022 Member
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    3. I'm always suspicious of a guy who randomly says "I want to be in a relationship." Since when do men ever sit down with a woman and have THAT discussion? If you wanted to be in a relationship, we'd already be in a relationship. If you have to tell me that's what you want, you're up to something.

    That's not true. I chased my wife through hell and back to get her to date me.

    To date you or to be in a relationship with you?

    One of my best friends refused to even go on a date with a guy for an entire year before she finally gave in and went out with him. But he never had to sit down with her and tell her that he wanted to be in a relationship. It was evident by the way he treated her, i.e. he didn't disappear for a few months and then show up one day and say "Let's be in a relationship."
  • salmat77
    salmat77 Posts: 310 Member
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    wow.... in my lifetime i wonder how many women i have caused to get fat cause i told them i liked them?. i feel so horrible

    Men are terrible creatures.. I'm not sure how we get up in the morning. Little did I know telling women nice things would side track them so much. I must never smile at one again, or look them in the eyes. I wonder if passing notes is okay? Wait..that is probably how this frail egosystem started. We should ban note passing for it is the gateway into adult conversation and compliments which leads to the dark path!


    LMAO, hysterical!!!
  • BeeElMarvin
    BeeElMarvin Posts: 2,086 Member
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    So this guy that I liked a few months back came to me Thursday or Friday of last week and we hung out watched movies and chilled. Nothing new.... Until he tells me that he needs to talk to me.... He goes on to say how good I was looking and how much he liked me and couldn't stop thinkin about me... And wants to start a long term relationship. So this event should have kicked or encouraged me to keep going, but NOOOOOOOOOOO, it spiralled me into a 5 day eating binge that left me sicker than a dog....
    Well I am back and not going to be side tracked again by a dumb guy who thinks a lil sweet talk will work...

    Good god! How is it his fault that you can't take a compliment and you turn a positive comment into a reason to eat?!? Some of you "ladies" really need to get your own heads straight before you bring some poor unsuspecting guy into your "fray".
  • BeeElMarvin
    BeeElMarvin Posts: 2,086 Member
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    Every time I tell my wife how much a love her, she punches me in the sack! God, I love that woman!
  • peacheywoo
    peacheywoo Posts: 52 Member
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    Just to throw another spanner in the works - we are only hearing one side of this as well. There are lots of potentials in this scenario that we'll never know cos we only have one view......
  • warmachinejt
    warmachinejt Posts: 2,167 Member
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    lol liking the misc comments in the 1st page forever alone
  • spicy618
    spicy618 Posts: 2,114 Member
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    :huh:


    I hope the OP comes back.

    OMG! I am laughing my A SS off. :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • cajunlady56
    cajunlady56 Posts: 151 Member
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    A few things came to mind from reading this thread ...

    1. Am I the only female who thinks it's NOT wrong for a man to be more attracted to you when you're no longer overweight? Isn't that just human nature?

    2. OP, please be honest about one thing ... that guy didn't put a gun to your head and force you to binge. You did it because it was easier than controlling your emotions on your own. If you feel you were mistreated, then blame him for that, but you don't get to blame him (and certainly not "men," in general) for YOUR behavior.

    3. I'm always suspicious of a guy who randomly says "I want to be in a relationship." Since when do men ever sit down with a woman and have THAT discussion? If you wanted to be in a relationship, we'd already be in a relationship. If you have to tell me that's what you want, you're up to something.
    [/quote

    Don't agree with number 3 - maybe it is just wisdom learned over my 54 years but I learned a long time ago to never assume I was in a realtionship with someone just by the way they act. To me you are setting yourself up to hear "Well I didn't know you thought we were exclusively dating"
  • cajunlady56
    cajunlady56 Posts: 151 Member
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    Ohhh Ohhh I know the answer I just need a pencil

    Eqn001.gif

    And the answer is...........................LONELY (not you the OP)
  • RyanDanielle5101
    RyanDanielle5101 Posts: 533
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    I have no comment for the OP but I will quote one of my favorite people:smile:

    Bi***es need to stop blaming all your problems on us. Stop tellin' a *****,"You f***ed up my self-esteem". B***h it's called SELF-ESTEEM! It's esteem of your mothaf**kin' self. How am I gonna f**k up how you feel about you simple b***h?

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • mcintyrekn
    mcintyrekn Posts: 55 Member
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    Geez. I wish I had this problem.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
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    I'm about to partake in reading this entire thread because I'm thoroughly confused by the OP. A guy says you look good and wants to be with you so you binge? And it's his fault?

    Huh?

    I'm obviously missing something.
  • auntdeedee87
    auntdeedee87 Posts: 706 Member
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    I'm about to partake in reading this entire thread because I'm thoroughly confused by the OP. A guy says you look good and wants to be with you so you binge? And it's his fault?

    Huh?

    I'm obviously missing something.


    Don't do it.
    You're never gonna get that time back.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
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    I'll take slings and arrows for this, but I have a TON of experience in it. Read my profile. Believe me - one of the hardest things to handle when you lose weight is being ATTRACTIVE to the opposite sex! We have NO EXPERIENCE in this area. It's scary! You're very vulnerable right now. Believe me - fat is far more than a biological side-effect of eating too much. It is a physical barrier to intimacy! It sure takes a lot of social pressure off of us to be fat. We don't have to worry about who is going to ask us out Saturday - we already know! NO ONE! Or maybe we'll go out with another same-sex friend who is alone also. That is safe. We don't have to risk our emotional well being on what may be a highly-sexually-charged MISTAKE that will result in horrible heartache and a total tearing down of our self-esteem (what little we have).

    My advice - TAKE YOUR TIME. Resist the temptation to become seriously involved with someone right now - you have to be come acquainted with your NEW self first! The first time I ever lost a bunch of weight (my early 20s), I wound up trashing a bunch of what could or should have been promising relationships because I was just too skittish and unprepared for anything serious. It's totally NORMAL that you would be not only taken by surprise by the attention of this guy, but for your DESTRUCTIVE SUBCONSCIOUS to inspire you to put up that old armor - that layer of FAT that protects us from social interaction and emotional vulnerability. Hang in there - realize that you're inexperienced at this and let him know you need to take your time to figure your way through this. If he's worth having around, he'll support you through this and wait until you're ready. If he pushes you, PUSH BACK and get the hell out of there! You've come too far to have it ruined by a horny, self-centered male!

    Been there big time...

    Tracy

    Have you ever read She's Come Undone?
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
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    I'm about to partake in reading this entire thread because I'm thoroughly confused by the OP. A guy says you look good and wants to be with you so you binge? And it's his fault?

    Huh?

    I'm obviously missing something.


    Don't do it.
    You're never gonna get that time back.
    lol

    Well, I'm trying to avoid doing anything productive, anyway.
  • Grokette
    Grokette Posts: 3,330 Member
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    I was still all pent up with the left over anger.... And after getting better can't stomach eating too much... So I just typed and forgot the extra info.

    Sorry

    Ok, I am going to play Devil's advocate here for a moment...................

    How do you know that he didn't like you and was just scared and being reserved at first to pursue a relationship? It sounds like you all hang out quite a bit. I mean come on, even to be FWB type relationship the 2 people have to mutually like one another.

    My husband and I started out as FWB and it grew into a very long term relationship.............18 years of being together with 13 years of that time being married.
  • ItsCasey
    ItsCasey Posts: 4,022 Member
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    Don't agree with number 3 - maybe it is just wisdom learned over my 54 years but I learned a long time ago to never assume I was in a realtionship with someone just by the way they act. To me you are setting yourself up to hear "Well I didn't know you thought we were exclusively dating"

    That is why the word "assume" didn't appear anywhere in my post. I'm not a third-grader. I don't need a guy to pass me a note that says "check yes or no" to figure out that he wants to be with me exclusively.

    Is he seeing you and only you? Are you seeing him and only him?
    Are you an integral part of his life? (That means: Does he have daily contact with you? Does he voluntarily let you know what he's got going on, or do you have no clue what he's doing when he's not within your sight? Does he spend more of his free time with you than with anyone else? Do his friends and family know who you are?) Is he an integral part of YOUR life?

    If you answered yes to those questions, you're in a relationship. If you answered no to any of them, you are not in a relationship. This is not that complicated.

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