Friends on MFP with poor food diaries?

ummlovelovesyou

Not gonna lie, sometimes I don't say anything because I don't know what their day was like or what happened...but if it's a constant nasty food thing,......it just makes me feel better about what I eat! :ohwell:

RAFValentina

Haha Brilliant! I love Mugatu (Will Ferrell) and Zoolander.... and any other film with him in!

RAFValentina

If someone asks for your advice, cool. Give it to them.

If you were to comment on my diary about something terrible in it, there's 100% chance I will say to myself, verbatim, "I'm not a retard, I understand that I made ****ty choices today. Thanks for pointing them out to me, asshat." I keep my diary open to my friends so I know I'll be accountable. If I know they can see it, I make better choices in general.

But there's still no need to say "Um, you ate 568 double-stuff oreos today. You know it's bad, right?" No crap.

If they're consistently making bad choices and seeing no progress and you're worried, maybe drop them a PM of concern. If they slipped up one day, don't be a jerk and point out what I'm sure they are already well aware of.

If you notice my diary exploding on a Friday, just turn around. Fridays are Fun Food Friday, and **** gets crazy up in my place.


ETA: I'm not saying you're a jerk or anything. This is how my hypothetical food diary situations go down.

I do agree with this... I think its wrong to just blurt out negativity...

But offering to give a few suggestions in a poilte, concerned way is tactful and kind. If they don;t want to hear it, it gives them the option to say no, I'm fine i know today was bad but *insert reason* and you haven't come across as a jerk... in addition it gives you chance to discuss why they did it which is probably more pertinent in eating behaviours.

t_rog

If someone asks for your advice, cool. Give it to them.

If you were to comment on my diary about something terrible in it, there's 100% chance I will say to myself, verbatim, "I'm not a retard, I understand that I made ****ty choices today. Thanks for pointing them out to me, asshat." I keep my diary open to my friends so I know I'll be accountable. If I know they can see it, I make better choices in general.

But there's still no need to say "Um, you ate 568 double-stuff oreos today. You know it's bad, right?" No crap.

If they're consistently making bad choices and seeing no progress and you're worried, maybe drop them a PM of concern. If they slipped up one day, don't be a jerk and point out what I'm sure they are already well aware of.

If you notice my diary exploding on a Friday, just turn around. Fridays are Fun Food Friday, and **** gets crazy up in my place.


ETA: I'm not saying you're a jerk or anything. This is how my hypothetical food diary situations go down.

I think I just fell in love with you.

Helloitsdan

All the time. I'm always giving praise where praise is due and breaking balls when they need to be broken.

ILiftHeavyAcrylics

I have one friend that I specifically ask for help when I need it because he's really good at being positive and kicking my butt at the same time. I know this about him because he's my oldest friend on this site (that's not saying much lol) and he always has great feedback on topics so I trust him with my diary. But otherwise, I like to make my own choices and live with them, and I think most people are the same. I had a friend that started out wanting feedback but now her diary is private, and I imagine she got too much negative. I hope I didn't contribute to that, but it's possible I did. It's the internet after all and it's easy to misread what a stranger has typed. I think the key is to know your friends and what their goals are, which for me means keeping my friends' list pretty short. I know that some of my friends, like me, have lupus and struggle with illness. Some are other military spouses that deal with the struggles of that. But if I don't know what a friend's goal is, I shouldn't comment. I don't know whether they're just struggling to get their calories in check or if they're trying to eat lower sodium, or less carbs, or whatever. Without that information I can't comment constructively, so I don't.

LuciaLongIsland

Well, luckily my friends are supportive of me. I appreciate! them, and they me. NO ONE HAS GIVEN ME ADVICE UNLESS I ASKED.
You do not need to use bathroom terminology. That I FIND VERY OFFENSIVE. That should be kept private if you dont mind.

nerdyandilikeit

I do agree with this... I think its wrong to just blurt out negativity...

But offering to give a few suggestions in a poilte, concerned way is tactful and kind. If they don;t want to hear it, it gives them the option to say no, I'm fine i know today was bad but *insert reason* and you haven't come across as a jerk... in addition it gives you chance to discuss why they did it which is probably more pertinent in eating behaviours.

I agree. I'm just snarky about things like that in my head to myself. If someone does point things out to me, I'll politely let them know whether I'm aware of it or not that day.

nerdyandilikeit

I think I just fell in love with you.

You just made my day

IronmanPanda

Well, luckily my friends are supportive of me. I appreciate! them, and they me. NO ONE HAS GIVEN ME ADVICE UNLESS I ASKED.
You do not need to use bathroom terminology. That I FIND VERY OFFENSIVE. That should be kept private if you dont mind.

You do realize there's a quote button right? So people know who you're referencing. :flowerforyou:

maygans

Clearly the person that keeps repeatedly commenting is trolling. Their goal is 1k calories a day, and they frequently consume 4 cups of cereal with half and half. 1 day for a snack they had 7 teaspoons of sugar. It honestly doesn't matter if they come back here and try to explain why they eat the way they do and even throw in a "You don't know my situation!" (And I honestly don't care what their situation is) because the OP doesn't know all of their friend's situations either, or the reason they eat the way they do.

Yakisoba

Well, luckily my friends are supportive of me. I appreciate! them, and they me. NO ONE HAS GIVEN ME ADVICE UNLESS I ASKED.
You do not need to use bathroom terminology. That I FIND VERY OFFENSIVE. That should be kept private if you dont mind.

You do realize there's a quote button right? So people know who you're referencing. :flowerforyou:

I already told her that. Apparently, typing isn't her forte (not my words) so I'll just group using MFP in there as well.

Also, everyone poops. EVERYONE. Don't be offended by your poops.

StrengthIsBeautiful

I'm broke. Flat broke. The only thing you would see in my food diary for the next two weeks is Ramen Noodles. Yep. One pack a day.
If you think I need someone to comment on that, you be crazy.
I don't like it, and it's not my ideal food, but it's what I've got to see me through.
My diary is private because of things such as this. 'taint nobody's business.
I don't have MFP friends either, because of crap like this and so many 'rules' on how to be a good friend and so many reasons why people will delete friends. I'm better off going it alone.

LuciaLongIsland

I did not smell, TYVM. I gave up smoking for personal reasons and became "FAT"...If I could smoke, I would/ Life is short. Everyone I know that smoked died at 90...so..perhaps the surgeon general should comment on oreos and other fattening foods like he does cigarettes...being overweight is bad for your health. No one goes up to a overweight person and says stop eating, or at the beach when they are in a bathing suit, says you are making me sick, you disgust me, but there is no problem telling a smoker they smell, or get out of their space. I guess smoking is worse then obesity and smokers do not have the same rights. Wow, I thought this was a free country.

woou

I try to only comment when asked. I haven't even looked at anyone's diary yet. :laugh:

Forme4real2

Clearly the person that keeps repeatedly commenting is trolling. Their goal is 1k calories a day, and they frequently consume 4 cups of cereal with half and half. 1 day for a snack they had 7 teaspoons of sugar. It honestly doesn't matter if they come back here and try to explain why they eat the way they do and even throw in a "You don't know my situation!" (And I honestly don't care what their situation is) because the OP doesn't know all of their friend's situations either, or the reason they eat the way they do.

Pure awesomeness.

IronmanPanda

Clearly the person that keeps repeatedly commenting is trolling. Their goal is 1k calories a day, and they frequently consume 4 cups of cereal with half and half. 1 day for a snack they had 7 teaspoons of sugar. It honestly doesn't matter if they come back here and try to explain why they eat the way they do and even throw in a "You don't know my situation!" (And I honestly don't care what their situation is) because the OP doesn't know all of their friend's situations either, or the reason they eat the way they do.

Damn yo. That is one f'ed up food diary... Try getting some fresh fruit and veggies in there at least yeesh..

Forme4real2

I did not smell, TYVM. I gave up smoking for personal reasons and became "FAT"...If I could smoke, I would/ Life is short. Everyone I know that smoked died at 90...so..perhaps the surgeon general should comment on oreos and other fattening foods like he does cigarettes...being overweight is bad for your health. No one goes up to a overweight person and says stop eating, or at the beach when they are in a bathing suit, says you are making me sick, you disgust me, but there is no problem telling a smoker they smell, or get out of their space. I guess smoking is worse then obesity and smokers do not have the same rights. Wow, I thought this was a free country.

1st you knew people who smoked who died at 90?? and thats a bad thing?
2ndly as far as people not saying anything to overweight people like they do smokers. That's a lie! I remember going through school with lots of kids making fun of me for being overweight and even adults making comments to me! I also just recently quite smoking (6 months smoke free) and not once did anyone come up to me and make comments about my smoking they way they have with my weight.

Yakisoba

I did not smell, TYVM. I gave up smoking for personal reasons and became "FAT"...If I could smoke, I would/ Life is short. Everyone I know that smoked died at 90...so..perhaps the surgeon general should comment on oreos and other fattening foods like he does cigarettes...being overweight is bad for your health. No one goes up to a overweight person and says stop eating, or at the beach when they are in a bathing suit, says you are making me sick, you disgust me, but there is no problem telling a smoker they smell, or get out of their space. I guess smoking is worse then obesity and smokers do not have the same rights. Wow, I thought this was a free country.

If you've smoked for a long time, you would not be able to tell that you smelled.
If you hung around smokers, that probably couldn't tell that you smelled.
When it comes to loved ones, they're selective about telling folks stuff like that.

You might have not smelled all the time, but smoke does leave a smell and it stinks. -_- People do go up to overweight people and tell them to stop eating. They do call them gross and disgusting. Being overweight is such a stigma in this society. Why do you think more people than ever are turning to diet fads?

You can tell someone to stop smoking because that will be better for their health. You can't tell an overweight person to stop eating because they'll starve to death. What correlation were you trying to make? Derp.

nerdyandilikeit

I did not smell, TYVM. I gave up smoking for personal reasons and became "FAT"...If I could smoke, I would/ Life is short. Everyone I know that smoked died at 90...so..perhaps the surgeon general should comment on oreos and other fattening foods like he does cigarettes...being overweight is bad for your health. No one goes up to a overweight person and says stop eating, or at the beach when they are in a bathing suit, says you are making me sick, you disgust me, but there is no problem telling a smoker they smell, or get out of their space. I guess smoking is worse then obesity and smokers do not have the same rights. Wow, I thought this was a free country.

Just my thoughts on how smoking affects others: It does, physically. I know that after being on my own and not being around smokers in my every day life, then going home to visit these smokers, I always get headaches and have trouble with my asthma just being in their houses. To me, it's different to ask someone to not smoke near you for that reason, than to ask someone to leave a beach (besides the rudeness factor).