Wow I really dont want to hear that

ngory07

I understand where you are coming from but going from obese to almost a healthy weight I see both sides. I was 304 in january. When women said that it would set me off too. Girls who were sticks would complain and I had this. one very very mean girl in nursing school tell me she would kill herself if she ever became my size. To my face. Now that I am 157 bigger women get upset with me. I do need to lose 17 lbs to get to goal. And I have fat and a big tummy and everything else I'm not happy with plus saggy skin. I love my body a lot more than I did then but I still have a ways to go.

Also after being on here I now understand the difference between what you weigh and getting more toned and fit. Honeslty if I worked out more I probably would have a better body. Its one of my goals not only to lose but get fit and some people don't understand the difference and may think they are fat rather than just not toned or healthy. She may be referring to that. I talk about my weight with people other than my close friends and its a touchy subject no matter who your talking to. I know I'm not going to notice someone else is uncomfortable if I'm having a really I feel fat day. We got ourselves obese and now we have to change it. People do have the right to voice their opinions and just because you are overweight doesn't mean people have to sugar coat everything for you and walk on eggshells so you don't get offended. My respose would have been based on post " well I think you look amazing but there is nothing wrong with wanting to be even more fit and healthy" women are so catty it amazes me sometimes. We should be unified but really we tear each other down to make ourselves feel better.

iamnotashley

lets reverse that situation. Say a "clearly over weight" person is sitting next to someone that weighed 120lbs and was complaining about HER weight......do you think that might make the 120 lb person uncomfortable as well? Total double standard as I see it. EVERYONE has the right to talk about whatever they want-if someone doesn't like it, they can always walk away.

Yes. An overweight person has every right to complain about being overweight. If someone isn't overweight...complaining they are is obviously odd - but people have eating disorders, emotional problems, and such. Why is it only the skinny people are being treated as if they can complain, but overweight people can't? Overweight people hold the same problems as people who aren't overweight can.

That being said, if a person is 120 pounds and doesn't have any of the problems listed above, there is no reason why they should feel uncomfortable with an overweight person unless they agree, lol.

If your situation was reversed, it would mean that the overweight person would be uncomfortable with a skinny person saying "omg I'm so fat" when they aren't. Isn't that what OP is saying, that it's annoying and uncomfortable? But we have to deal with it because they might have body issues, wouldn't the skinny person in your situation also have to deal with it since the fat person probably has issues too?

KayteeBear

I totally understand...I have some friends who are super skinny. A family of five girls between 12-21. The oldest two girls are stick skinny, middle one was bigger but now she's a smaller, curvy girl and the second youngest is between the other three. The second youngest usually is the one talking about feeling fat and in a way I can understand because she lives with two girls who are super tiny and can eat like a cow and not gain an ounce. I always tell her that if she's fat then I'm a hippo. lol But I tell her in all seriousness that she can't compare to her oldest sisters because they're built differently and instead look at me and her other sister because we're closer in build and we're all fairly similar in size anyway.

seehawkmomma

I understand where you are coming from but going from obese to almost a healthy weight I see both sides. I was 304 in january. When women said that it would set me off too. Girls who were sticks would complain and I had this. one very very mean girl in nursing school tell me she would kill herself if she ever became my size. To my face. Now that I am 157 bigger women get upset with me. I do need to lose 17 lbs to get to goal. And I have fat and a big tummy and everything else I'm not happy with plus saggy skin. I love my body a lot more than I did then but I still have a ways to go.

Also after being on here I now understand the difference between what you weigh and getting more toned and fit. Honeslty if I worked out more I probably would have a better body. Its one of my goals not only to lose but get fit and some people don't understand the difference and may think they are fat rather than just not toned or healthy. She may be referring to that. I talk about my weight with people other than my close friends and its a touchy subject no matter who your talking to. I know I'm not going to notice someone else is uncomfortable if I'm having a really I feel fat day. We got ourselves obese and now we have to change it. People do have the right to voice their opinions and just because you are overweight doesn't mean people have to sugar coat everything for you and walk on eggshells so you don't get offended. My respose would have been based on post " well I think you look amazing but there is nothing wrong with wanting to be even more fit and healthy" women are so catty it amazes me sometimes. We should be unified but really we tear each other down to make ourselves feel better.

I'm not saying anyone has to walk on egg shells. I know my weight. I know its not healthy. I've heard the comments.

Like I said previously I think she should have saved it for someone who maybe understood her self image issues. Why say that to chick who has to eat cucumbers so her butt doesnt grow??

i wasnt trying to tear anyone down. Again like I said i'm jealous of her. She can eat whatever she wants and maintain a weight that I have to work really hard for.

seehawkmomma

I understand where you are coming from but going from obese to almost a healthy weight I see both sides. I was 304 in january. When women said that it would set me off too. Girls who were sticks would complain and I had this. one very very mean girl in nursing school tell me she would kill herself if she ever became my size. To my face. Now that I am 157 bigger women get upset with me. I do need to lose 17 lbs to get to goal. And I have fat and a big tummy and everything else I'm not happy with plus saggy skin. I love my body a lot more than I did then but I still have a ways to go.

Also after being on here I now understand the difference between what you weigh and getting more toned and fit. Honeslty if I worked out more I probably would have a better body. Its one of my goals not only to lose but get fit and some people don't understand the difference and may think they are fat rather than just not toned or healthy. She may be referring to that. I talk about my weight with people other than my close friends and its a touchy subject no matter who your talking to. I know I'm not going to notice someone else is uncomfortable if I'm having a really I feel fat day. We got ourselves obese and now we have to change it. People do have the right to voice their opinions and just because you are overweight doesn't mean people have to sugar coat everything for you and walk on eggshells so you don't get offended. My respose would have been based on post " well I think you look amazing but there is nothing wrong with wanting to be even more fit and healthy" women are so catty it amazes me sometimes. We should be unified but really we tear each other down to make ourselves feel better.

I'm not saying anyone has to walk on egg shells. I know my weight. I know its not healthy. I've heard the comments.

Like I said previously I think she should have saved it for someone who maybe understood her self image issues. Why say that to chick who has to eat cucumbers so her butt doesnt grow??

i wasnt trying to tear anyone down. Again like I said i'm jealous of her. She can eat whatever she wants and maintain a weight that I have to work really hard for.

Fieldsy

Some people really think that way, and others just want the attention

ilookthetype

Maybe its just me. But I gota vent.

Its really REALLY annoying to me when I hear a chick that weighs probably a buck 30 wet call herself fat.

Its like WOW if you think your fat I must be a friggin whale.

Just saying.

Its annoying.....

Thats all.

Everyone has their own body image issues. In that woman's mind, she IS fat. It has nothing to do with you. Get over yourself.

Pretty sure you gave this advice to someone else "no one strapped you to a chair and forced you to read this"

I said at the start I was just venting.

But thanks sooo much for you input I'll try to put my ego aside just for YOU.

At first I was going to sympathize with you, then I read this, now I think you might just be hyper sensitize.

mugsisme

Is it at all possible to misunderstand someone? Last week I said, "I am a fat pig". My husband freaked out and said I have issues. What I *MEANT* was, "I ate like a fat pig". After I explained it to him, he calmed down.

That said, unless a person is standing in front of you naked, you have no idea if they are fat or not. I am thin, but I still have belly fat cuz I had seven kids. Well, belly flabby skin. No way to get rid of it except with a tummy tuck. Do I consider myself fat? Sometimes I think I look fat (when I am bloated). I am sure it would drive people crazy to hear me say that.

And yeah, a lot of people do it for attention. (Like the ones who say, "I am going to leave F@cebook", and then wait for everyone to say, "Oh, we love you too much, please don't leave.")

The only time I think I would be upset is if I were in a dressing room with someone who was about to try something on and said it when they obviously weren't. (Like at Loehmann's, iykwim)

seehawkmomma

Maybe its just me. But I gota vent.

Its really REALLY annoying to me when I hear a chick that weighs probably a buck 30 wet call herself fat.

Its like WOW if you think your fat I must be a friggin whale.

Just saying.

Its annoying.....

Thats all.

Everyone has their own body image issues. In that woman's mind, she IS fat. It has nothing to do with you. Get over yourself.

Pretty sure you gave this advice to someone else "no one strapped you to a chair and forced you to read this"

I said at the start I was just venting.

But thanks sooo much for you input I'll try to put my ego aside just for YOU.

At first I was going to sympathize with you, then I read this, now I think you might just be hyper sensitize.

And you figured that out on the first page. Way to go.

seehawkmomma

Is it at all possible to misunderstand someone? Last week I said, "I am a fat pig". My husband freaked out and said I have issues. What I *MEANT* was, "I ate like a fat pig". After I explained it to him, he calmed down.

That said, unless a person is standing in front of you naked, you have no idea if they are fat or not. I am thin, but I still have belly fat cuz I had seven kids. Well, belly flabby skin. No way to get rid of it except with a tummy tuck. Do I consider myself fat? Sometimes I think I look fat (when I am bloated). I am sure it would drive people crazy to hear me say that.

And yeah, a lot of people do it for attention. (Like the ones who say, "I am going to leave F@cebook", and then wait for everyone to say, "Oh, we love you too much, please don't leave.")

The only time I think I would be upset is if I were in a dressing room with someone who was about to try something on and said it when they obviously weren't. (Like at Loehmann's, iykwim)

btw I posted back on page 5 that over reacted.

ygglove

I have a cousin who's really skinny. She has always been skinny- after she got pregnant, she gained weight, and worked really hard to lose it. When she was about 130, I thought she looked beautiful, I couldn't find anything wrong with her- but she could, and in the end, it's how she sees her self. She would of course, make comments about how she was fat and disgusting, and she wasn't happy with her body. Could I resent her, or be upset at her, for calling HERSELF fat? No. It doesn't hurt my feelings when she says it, because I know she's talking about herself, and that she's not judging me, as a person. In fact, she's one of my biggest supporters when it comes to weight loss, or school, or anything. She doesn't see ME how I see myself, just like I didn't see HER how she saw herself.. I think that before you get upset, you really need to think about those things.. Even if it's "fishing for a compliment"- in a way, there's obviously some kind of insecurity, where the person needs to be reassured that they're beautiful.

JipsyJudy

Seahawkmomma, now that I've read the story behind your rant, I get it. Next time this coworker makes a remark like that, just tell her she's welcome to eat some healthy stuff with you.

Becky99504

wow......To the person whoended their commnet with...."telling someone to get over them selves ".... I find your comment downright rude! I personally can relate to being confounded by thin people who think they are fat....I'm sure it's a body image problem!

mugsisme

Okay Okay

So let me explain just a wee bit further(which I should have done in the first place)

First off this is just a VENT. This is how I FEEL.

So I'm eatting my cuccumber snack the girl I work with comes up to me and says "omg I need to start eatting healthier too I'm soooooo fat" than I see her walk back to her desk with a bag of chips.

Okay so A: I dont think its a stab at me. B: I think its insanely rude.

OMG. Unbelievably rude!!!!!!!!

SyntonicGarden

Next time this coworker makes a remark like that, just tell her she's welcome to eat some healthy stuff with you.

Optimistic and constructive. These are the types of posts that make me wish MFP had a "Like" option.

seehawkmomma

Next time this coworker makes a remark like that, just tell her she's welcome to eat some healthy stuff with you.

Optimistic and constructive. These are the types of posts that make me wish MFP had a "Like" option.

I agree. On both parts. We do need a like button and thats a great idea. Next time I'll use that

bcattoes

Okay Okay

So let me explain just a wee bit further(which I should have done in the first place)

First off this is just a VENT. This is how I FEEL.

So I'm eatting my cuccumber snack the girl I work with comes up to me and says "omg I need to start eatting healthier too I'm soooooo fat" than I see her walk back to her desk with a bag of chips.

Okay so A: I dont think its a stab at me. B: I think its insanely rude.

OMG. Unbelievably rude!!!!!!!!

I don't know this person, but it's possible it wasn't meant to be rude. Perhaps she was actually making a positive comment on the fact that you were doing well by eating a healthy snack, while she can't give up chips and is gaining weight.

Nicola0000

I agree with most of the posts above. Im 5'7 and weight 131, but I call myself "skinny fat" as although my weight on the scales is good, I still have muffin tops. I want to be ripped, so to me I am fat, and want to lower my body fat %.

seehawkmomma

I agree with most of the posts above. Im 5'7 and weight 131, but I call myself "skinny fat" as although my weight on the scales is good, I still have muffin tops. I want to be ripped, so to me I am fat, and want to lower my body fat %.

Here's the difference though. Do you think you'd make the comment to someone in the office while you mow on some chips?

I think for some people they think its okay. And for me If it was a close friend who I understood where they are coming from it would be different.

Me personally if i was 130ish pounds I wouldnt make that comment around someone over 200lbs eatting like a rabbit.

But thats me.

SassyCalyGirl

The lesson here is-if you are thinner than the person next to you-god forbid if you talk about getting healthy' fit or losing weight. So tired of the eye rolls and double standard. Someone can say..."God, she's so skinny"-like the person is gonna fall over of malnutrition, but again, god forbid if someone called another person fat!