breastfeeding in public

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Replies

  • dlei456
    dlei456 Posts: 201 Member
    [/quote]

    Is that what you're doing? Stepping outside your comfort zone and trying to think about what others are saying? Or are you just trying to point out how people who think differently than you are wrong?
    [/quote]

    Well, you did say that you don't put yourself in situations that make you uncomfortable. And, I have been a young person who was uncomfortable with seeing other people's bodies.

    And btw, after living in several places as well, I am in living in the South now!

    I am having trouble with quotes! haha!
  • christine24t
    christine24t Posts: 6,063 Member
    Well, I really believe that true learning means stepping out of your comfort zone and really challenging yourself. That's good that you enjoyed this thread. I really feel like the comments became controversial when breastfeeding moms started being judged and criticized. I think those comments were also rude and written to make people upset.

    I think both sides have gotten flack. I think that the BF moms were judged not for breastfeeding, but for choosing to do it in a public place. I don't agree with it, sure, but I tried my hardest not to insult anybody who believed the opposite of me. Clearly, it's legal and I'm not going to stop it. When i see it in public, I am uncomfortable, and if I can leave, I do, but I wish that the BF-moms would consider others' feelings when they are BF in public. All I want is a little consideration for those who are uncomfortable with it.

    I was told, among many things, that I shouldn't have children, because I don't plan to breastfeed and don't like to see it in public. That was uncalled for. I'm not saying I'm perfect or I have great arguments, but I was attacked as well.

    Just found this article: http://www.theusefulbox.com/2011/06/breastfeeding-in-public-taboo-or.html

    I will quote the last line: "But, sometimes I choose not to exercise my right to breastfeed in public for the sake of others. I choose not to make others feel uncomfortable for the sake of making a political statement. I think breastfeeding in public is terrific. But I think caring for other people is more terrific."
  • dlei456
    dlei456 Posts: 201 Member
    Well, I really believe that true learning means stepping out of your comfort zone and really challenging yourself. That's good that you enjoyed this thread. I really feel like the comments became controversial when breastfeeding moms started being judged and criticized. I think those comments were also rude and written to make people upset.

    I think both sides have gotten flack. I think that the BF moms were judged not for breastfeeding, but for choosing to do it in a public place. I don't agree with it, sure, but I tried my hardest not to insult anybody who believed the opposite of me. Clearly, it's legal and I'm not going to stop it. When i see it in public, I am uncomfortable, and if I can leave, I do, but I wish that the BF-moms would consider others' feelings when they are BF in public. All I want is a little consideration for those who are uncomfortable with it.

    I was told, among many things, that I shouldn't have children, because I don't plan to breastfeed and don't like to see it in public. That was uncalled for. I'm not saying I'm perfect or I have great arguments, but I was attacked as well.

    Well, please consider that most breastfeeding moms do NOT want to breastfeed in public because they are super conscious of other people's feelings. Many already have said it, but it is mortifying. A little understanding both ways would help.
  • tlsegar
    tlsegar Posts: 185 Member

    Is that what you're doing? Stepping outside your comfort zone and trying to think about what others are saying? Or are you just trying to point out how people who think differently than you are wrong?
    [/quote]

    Well, you did say that you don't put yourself in situations that make you uncomfortable. And, I have been a young person who was uncomfortable with seeing other people's bodies.

    And btw, after living in several places as well, I am in living in the South now!

    I am having trouble with quotes! haha!
    [/quote]

    I'm not made uncomfortable by discussing or debating with people on the opposite side or learning about different cultures. I think that's necessary to determine what I like or don't. I generally have the attitude that my opinion is my opinion and I'm secure with it. Even if I'm the only person in the room who feels the way I do - and I have been - I'm okay with that. So I don't view discussing opposing views as making me uncomfortable like I would going to a nude beach.

    Hope you're enjoying the south. But I have to say, unless you're a dyed in the wool southerner, you're probably not going to pick up on the north vs. south thing. And then it still depends on what southern state you live in.
  • dlei456
    dlei456 Posts: 201 Member
    Well, I really believe that true learning means stepping out of your comfort zone and really challenging yourself. That's good that you enjoyed this thread. I really feel like the comments became controversial when breastfeeding moms started being judged and criticized. I think those comments were also rude and written to make people upset.

    I think both sides have gotten flack. I think that the BF moms were judged not for breastfeeding, but for choosing to do it in a public place. I don't agree with it, sure, but I tried my hardest not to insult anybody who believed the opposite of me. Clearly, it's legal and I'm not going to stop it. When i see it in public, I am uncomfortable, and if I can leave, I do, but I wish that the BF-moms would consider others' feelings when they are BF in public. All I want is a little consideration for those who are uncomfortable with it.

    I was told, among many things, that I shouldn't have children, because I don't plan to breastfeed and don't like to see it in public. That was uncalled for. I'm not saying I'm perfect or I have great arguments, but I was attacked as well.

    Just found this article: http://www.theusefulbox.com/2011/06/breastfeeding-in-public-taboo-or.html

    I will quote the last line: "But, sometimes I choose not to exercise my right to breastfeed in public for the sake of others. I choose not to make others feel uncomfortable for the sake of making a political statement. I think breastfeeding in public is terrific. But I think caring for other people is more terrific."

    But, it sounds like the blogger chooses to exercise her right to breastfeed in public as well and probably just as often.

    Good luck with all your future plans and hope that they turn out for the best.
  • christine24t
    christine24t Posts: 6,063 Member
    Well, I really believe that true learning means stepping out of your comfort zone and really challenging yourself. That's good that you enjoyed this thread. I really feel like the comments became controversial when breastfeeding moms started being judged and criticized. I think those comments were also rude and written to make people upset.

    I think both sides have gotten flack. I think that the BF moms were judged not for breastfeeding, but for choosing to do it in a public place. I don't agree with it, sure, but I tried my hardest not to insult anybody who believed the opposite of me. Clearly, it's legal and I'm not going to stop it. When i see it in public, I am uncomfortable, and if I can leave, I do, but I wish that the BF-moms would consider others' feelings when they are BF in public. All I want is a little consideration for those who are uncomfortable with it.

    I was told, among many things, that I shouldn't have children, because I don't plan to breastfeed and don't like to see it in public. That was uncalled for. I'm not saying I'm perfect or I have great arguments, but I was attacked as well.

    Well, please consider that most breastfeeding moms do NOT want to breastfeed in public because they are super conscious of other people's feelings. Many already have said it, but it is mortifying. A little understanding both ways would help.

    I recall one poster saying they didn't care if it was public or private. But I do understand that the majority of people would rather not do it in public, and that is why breastfeeding rooms or family rooms at stores and malls are becoming more common!
  • Kymmu
    Kymmu Posts: 1,650 Member
    The actual reason women have breasts an nipples is to feed our babies.
    Not for men's enjoyment......
    It's just biology. Nothing gross, or anything else.
    We are mammals.
    If a baby needs feeding they should be fed. In public or elsewhere.
    I used to feed my babies whenever they needed it. It has nothing to do with anything or anyone else.
    I think Some people need to grow up, and get their minds out of the gutter.

    In Australia in the 1970's1980's and 1990's most women topless bathed on beaches. it was so commonplace no one thought too much of it. Now most people are concerned with skin Cancer, and pre mature aging so it's not so prevalent, but not too unusual either....
    Breast is Best .........Lol!
  • lilac67
    lilac67 Posts: 311
    I have 3 children and breast fed all of them. I'm all for nature and natural things, but I'm also about modesty. It really won't kill anyone to use a receiving blanket to cover yourself as much as you can. I really didn't like public feeding , but I did it. At a friend or family member's home, I asked to use a bedroom. I always felt that was my private time to bond with my baby. As much as I am modest, but not a prude, I really don't like to see it myself. I feel that modesty keeps everyone more comfortable, just like good manners. It seems in this day and age we don't think about anyone but ourselves and our own feelings. I won't say that you can't "be out-there" in public, but if I see you all plopped out there, I'll probably go quietly somewhere else.

    I know it's been said before but using a blanket isn't always an option. My little girl would unlatch if there was a blanket over her head. In the summer would you like a blanket covering your head while you eat? I normally NORMALLY tried to be modest by wearing two shirts, pulling one down, pulling the other up. But in the summer? 90 degree heat? When I'm at the beach? Nah... whip the boob out and that's that. If someon has a problem I have a blanket for THEIR head.

    If you were putting the blanket over the baby's head, you were doing it wrong, lol, you're supposed to cover yourself, not the baby, lol!!
  • lilac67
    lilac67 Posts: 311
    387829_2847642346154_1112297368_3206201_366741092_n.jpg

    lol :)

    I consider the mother in this pic being modest, what's so bad about that? She's not covering up her baby's head.(in reference to above post)
  • cobracars
    cobracars Posts: 949 Member
    Don't eat around other people and call it a day. when will this thread die?

    What's the difference between a pit bull and this thread? Eventually the pitbull will let go! :bigsmile:
  • ajbeans
    ajbeans Posts: 2,857 Member
    the only reason I could think of for her NOT to go to a private area would be to cause a scene.

    Or because she wants to finish her shopping. Or because she wants to finish her lunch. Or because she's spending time with friends. Or because she's running late for an appointment and the baby's hungry and she doesn't have time to go somewhere else right now.

    Or simply because she doesn't want to be discriminated against. A mother using a bottle would never be asked to "do that in a more private place."
  • ajbeans
    ajbeans Posts: 2,857 Member
    I love the "feed the baby before you go out" stuff. From people who don't have a baby. Babies dont' always operate on a schedule. They sometimes go through growth spurts of a week at a time when they're hungry pretty much constantly. They throw up and then get hungry again. They have a giant poop and then get hungry again. Sometimes they have a tummy ache and want to eat more to make it feel better. Sometimes they can't get to sleep without nursing, and they get tired and cranky even though it's not normal naptime. Formula-fed babies have these issues too. Babies are human beings, and they have needs that sometimes don't work neatly in with what we want to do.

    I've always been very careful about working my life around my babies' schedule because they can't change and I can. So yes, I fed them before we went out. And yet, sometimes I still had to nurse them in public. Sometimes I even had to go somewhere and change a diaper because they didn't poop on schedule. Sometimes they fell asleep when I was taking them to meet a friend for the first time. Sometimes they cried in the store and wouldn't stop. Oh the horrors of my non-robot children!
  • ajbeans
    ajbeans Posts: 2,857 Member
    ..
  • ajbeans
    ajbeans Posts: 2,857 Member

    If you were putting the blanket over the baby's head, you were doing it wrong, lol, you're supposed to cover yourself, not the baby, lol!!

    Have you seen the nursing covers? They go over baby's head, and usually the whole baby. And covering just your breast is difficult, and still irritating for the baby, because the baby's face is right there attached to your breast. The blanket gets down there on the baby's cheek and it's annoying, and you have to hold it there to keep it from falling off as the baby squirms, while at the same time trying to hold, you know, the BABY securely. It's not easy, and at least in my case, caused more of a stir than just not worrying about it.
  • Scorpiomom222
    Scorpiomom222 Posts: 1,462 Member
    I love the "feed the baby before you go out" stuff. From people who don't have a baby. Babies dont' always operate on a schedule. They sometimes go through growth spurts of a week at a time when they're hungry pretty much constantly. They throw up and then get hungry again. They have a giant poop and then get hungry again. Sometimes they have a tummy ache and want to eat more to make it feel better. Sometimes they can't get to sleep without nursing, and they get tired and cranky even though it's not normal naptime. Formula-fed babies have these issues too. Babies are human beings, and they have needs that sometimes don't work neatly in with what we want to do.

    I've always been very careful about working my life around my babies' schedule because they can't change and I can. So yes, I fed them before we went out. And yet, sometimes I still had to nurse them in public. Sometimes I even had to go somewhere and change a diaper because they didn't poop on schedule. Sometimes they fell asleep when I was taking them to meet a friend for the first time. Sometimes they cried in the store and wouldn't stop. Oh the horrors of my non-robot children!

    Love this!!!
  • Scorpiomom222
    Scorpiomom222 Posts: 1,462 Member

    If you were putting the blanket over the baby's head, you were doing it wrong, lol, you're supposed to cover yourself, not the baby, lol!!

    Have you seen the nursing covers? They go over baby's head, and usually the whole baby. And covering just your breast is difficult, and still irritating for the baby, because the baby's face is right there attached to your breast. The blanket gets down there on the baby's cheek and it's annoying, and you have to hold it there to keep it from falling off as the baby squirms, while at the same time trying to hold, you know, the BABY securely. It's not easy, and at least in my case, caused more of a stir than just not worrying about it.

    My daughter HATED the blanket! And so did I! Know why? She got too hot, she had trouble latching(because I couldn't see to latch her) she pulled the blanket off, anyway, and it was all around totally NOT discreet. Discreet means almost nobody knows. If you would have seen me and my daughter trying to use a frickin blanket, it would have been obvious to the WORLD what I was doing. She'd tug on a nursing cover too and made it uncomfortable to wear. So NO! I will NOT cover ! My shirt and baby's head covers enough, thank you!
  • AtticusFinch
    AtticusFinch Posts: 1,262 Member

    I consider the mother in this pic being modest, what's so bad about that? She's not covering up her baby's head.(in reference to above post)

    You missed the point Lilac - the cartoon was directed at the the tarty women in the drawing applying a double standard.

    Public breastfeeding is perfectly acceptable if you have the brass neck to do it. If you do it however, don't take issue with anyone who looks at you doing it. They may be perving, but they may also be trying hard not to look uncomfortable and not avoid gazing in your direction.

    What I find unacceptable is people having loud conversations on mobile phones - but that's a whole different onion.
  • Marla64
    Marla64 Posts: 23,120 Member
    387829_2847642346154_1112297368_3206201_366741092_n.jpg

    Nail on the head-- perfect.
  • Scorpiomom222
    Scorpiomom222 Posts: 1,462 Member
    387829_2847642346154_1112297368_3206201_366741092_n.jpg

    Nail on the head-- perfect.

    Oh look! A baby is eating his lunch! And there's two broads, with 5 inches of clothing on!
  • Marla64
    Marla64 Posts: 23,120 Member
    387829_2847642346154_1112297368_3206201_366741092_n.jpg

    Nail on the head-- perfect.

    Oh look! A baby is eating his lunch! And there's two broads, with 5 inches of clothing on!

    Gasp! Is that a naked baby you have on your ticker? Scandalous!
  • floshideaway
    floshideaway Posts: 101 Member
    I breastfed both my kids in public and never had rude comments. My children have seen me naked countless times while growing up and I have seen them too until they moved out. I remember seeing my parents as well. Being from Europe probably explains that. We are way more comfortable with ourselves and not such prudes as people in this country. God gave us a body and meant for us to be comfortable in it. Both my children have a very healthy attitude and love hanging out naked in their homes, I don't do it as much because gravity has taken its toll, lol....This is what feeling good about ourselves is all about
  • Scorpiomom222
    Scorpiomom222 Posts: 1,462 Member
    387829_2847642346154_1112297368_3206201_366741092_n.jpg

    Nail on the head-- perfect.

    Oh look! A baby is eating his lunch! And there's two broads, with 5 inches of clothing on!

    Gasp! Is that a naked baby you have on your ticker? Scandalous!

    Oh NOOO! The world is coming to an end! I'm meeeeeeelllltiiing!
  • tchristine24:
    {quote}
    I recall one poster saying they didn't care if it was public or private. But I do understand that the majority of people would rather not do it in public, and that is why breastfeeding rooms or family rooms at stores and malls are becoming more common!
    {quote}


    I don't know where you are seeing these "breastfeeding rooms." What stores have them? They are a great idea, but I have never seen one.

    Granted I have yet to breastfeed a baby (as I do not yet have a baby) so perhaps that is why I haven't seen them, but the closest I have ever seen to a "breastfeeding" or "family room" at a store is a family bathroom. Yes, they are usually bigger and cleaner. Many have benches, but it's still a bathroom. Maybe you live in a more progressive area of the country.

    ps... I am quote-box challenged
  • Scorpiomom222
    Scorpiomom222 Posts: 1,462 Member
    I breastfed both my kids in public and never had rude comments. My children have seen me naked countless times while growing up and I have seen them too until they moved out. I remember seeing my parents as well. Being from Europe probably explains that. We are way more comfortable with ourselves and not such prudes as people in this country. God gave us a body and meant for us to be comfortable in it. Both my children have a very healthy attitude and love hanging out naked in their homes, I don't do it as much because gravity has taken its toll, lol....This is what feeling good about ourselves is all about

    Love this. There should be nothing modest in the family home, I don't think. I grew up around my mom and dad hiding themselves. I then saw what society thought to be attractive. Because I never saw my mom(she's always been kinda heavy after kids) unless she was completely dressed, I thought that unless your body was close to flawless, it was shameful to NOT be flawless. I REALIZED this a little over a year ago, when talking to some parenting friends about how it was getting time to start thinking about not being nude when the kids were up. One of them looked at me and said "why?" And it got me thinking yeah, why?
  • I will quote the last line: "But, sometimes I choose not to exercise my right to breastfeed in public for the sake of others. I choose not to make others feel uncomfortable for the sake of making a political statement. I think breastfeeding in public is terrific. But I think caring for other people is more terrific."

    This.

    I breast feeding in public can be done gracefully. However, I have seen it done not so gracefully. If you one of those who had your child in a sling and no one was able to see anything i am not talking about that.

    I am talking about the floppy boob with Exposure, maybe your shirt is a little high and you can see a little too much or maybe your child wasnt really hungry but your letting it cry with your breast hanging out.

    Breast feeding in publicc to make a point is why everyone is so upset I would think.
  • skinnydreams165
    skinnydreams165 Posts: 101 Member
    my son is 2, he sees me nude all the time. I have to shower and take him with me in the bathroom and lock the door otherwise he can get out of the house, climb over the gate, fall down the stairs, tip over the high chair while in it etc. I'm a single mom and if someone else lived here it would be easier for me to leave him in the room with them rather than take him in the bathroom with me. Hopefully he won't remember a thing when he gets older, I don't want him having visions of all of this body fat in his head growing up! Id rather have him see his Wife naked then have to remember his mother naked you know
  • learningtolove
    learningtolove Posts: 288 Member
    I think as long as mom has a blanket over babys head/boobie and is not near food then its no big deal.
  • learningtolove
    learningtolove Posts: 288 Member
    Also,I remeber showering with my aunt and cousin (male) when I was 6 or 7 ( he was 2-3) all nude. She would put the plug in so we could play in the bathtub while she cleaned. She had to shower every few days and couldn't leave us unsupervised so it was win win.
  • skinnydreams165
    skinnydreams165 Posts: 101 Member
    tchristine24:
    {quote}
    I recall one poster saying they didn't care if it was public or private. But I do understand that the majority of people would rather not do it in public, and that is why breastfeeding rooms or family rooms at stores and malls are becoming more common!
    {quote}


    I don't know where you are seeing these "breastfeeding rooms." What stores have them? They are a great idea, but I have never seen one.

    Granted I have yet to breastfeed a baby (as I do not yet have a baby) so perhaps that is why I haven't seen them, but the closest I have ever seen to a "breastfeeding" or "family room" at a store is a family bathroom. Yes, they are usually bigger and cleaner. Many have benches, but it's still a bathroom. Maybe you live in a more progressive area of the country.

    ps... I am quote-box challenged

    we have a mall that has regular restrooms then it has a special room for mommies and babies with comfy chairs, music, toilets in another area etc.. probably about 200 square feet and it's so nice. i wish more places could afford places like that for nursing mothers. I don't think a child should have to be fed in a bathroom, that is gross, but a nice clean place comfy for mom and baby is great. if there is not a place to go heck, feed your baby wherever you are just cover that breast up! i breast fed and I will do it again if I have more babies.
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