Negative Reinforcement (Don't Read If You Cant Take It)

macpatti

While I think negative reinforcement and tough love can definitely motivate some people, it can also be counterproductive to others. Use it on yourself if it works, and use it on others who are okay with it, but please don't assume that everyone will respond the same way to these tools.

TourThePast

Yup. That's me too. I am a out-of-shape, fat old man. No mystery how I got here. I ate badly and sat on my butt for years and years. No magic to changing it either. Eat right and exercise. Plain, simple and accurate.

I said something to that effect among a group of friends and one of them (an overweight woman) didn't like it but couldn't argue with me because I had said it about myself.

Oh exactly the same here, someone asked me the other day how I lost weight and I told them I finally realised it was time to get up off my fat *kitten* and get some exercise and also to grow up and stop eating and drinking every nice thing that I WANTED all the time, like a four year old let loose in a sweet shop, and start eating and drinking what I SHOULD have most of the time instead.

She looked at me as if I'd slapped her.

Oops. :ohwell:

I honestly was talking about myself, but if the cap fits...

H_Lilly

I hate the word fat just call me unpleasantly plump. I've got 20 to lose and I will do it by the end of April. Just started running again--What a BIT##. Love this topic.

TourThePast

I am fat. Fatty McFatso. That's why i'm here. To change that!

Hi Fatty McFatso! My name is Flabby McFlabberson. Nice to meet you! :laugh:

HI, you two! Pleasure to meet you as well! Fattie Bo Battie here :laugh: :laugh:

Not for long....

Pleased to meet you all, I'm Slimwaist McWobblyArse! :bigsmile:

(who is off to the gym soon to keep working on it)

Captain_Tightpants

I'm fat.

Yeah it hurts when people point it out but it's not much different to me saying "hey, you've got blue eyes".

iamstaceywood

victoria233

I am fat. Fatty McFatso. That's why i'm here. To change that!

Hi Fatty McFatso! My name is Flabby McFlabberson. Nice to meet you! :laugh:

HI, you two! Pleasure to meet you as well! Fattie Bo Battie here :laugh: :laugh:

Not for long....

my long lost friends! im back fat betty aka tina the talking tummy aka sally cellulite! :P

Kayla165

Yup! I am FAT too.

Meghan0116

Yep, I'm fat. Wait, said that wrong. Yep, I'm FAT. lol

I would much rather be fat then be called obese. I don't know why but obese bothers me. I know I am obese, I know I am fat but I will not always be fat. I am not going to let the FAT win, I will win!

CrazyLazyStylist

Ok, I THOUGHT I could take it, but lets be real here,I have abs (well a one pack) but, I personally have muscles, lots of them.. I mean atleast 10 pounds worth, who cares if you have to dig 3 inces deep through FAT to feel them, they're there damn it, and thats what matters..

Whew, who am I kidding...FAAAAT..

thatsnumberwang

I'm not fat, but I've recently started making an effort to stop arguing with my overweight friends when they call themselves fat, even though it takes a lot of willpower to do so. Why? Because I've recently realized that when we tell our loved ones "you're not fat," what we're really trying to say is, "you're not ugly, unattractive, unlovable, disgusting, or any other negative word our society intrinsically associates with the word 'fat'." My friends can be attractive, sexy, loveable people and also fat. Who am I to argue?

AnitraWill

Yep I'm Fat! And I'm sick of it! I'm conscious and no longer in denial! That alone feels good! Admitedly, I need some kind of motivation whether it's negative or positive.

bikermike5094

In my case, morbidly obese is the correct term.... extremely fat in laymans terms...

jerber160

i DUNNO. THE REALIZATION THAT i'M MEDICALLY OBESE WAS QUITE A SHOCK.... MUCH MORE POWERFUL THAN FAT

MrsKunz

i DUNNO. THE REALIZATION THAT i'M MEDICALLY OBESE WAS QUITE A SHOCK.... MUCH MORE POWERFUL THAN FAT

^^^^^^^^^^THIS!!!!!!^^^^^^^^^

namenumber

I'm fat. And I know exactly how I got here. Late night junk food, no exercise, and 4 Dr. Peppers a day.

I'm still fat, but I'm working to not be fat anymore

apesid

I get annoyed when I am talk about/ mention something about being F-A-T and whoever I'm talking to says "Oh shut, up. You're not fat" (or something to that end). Yes, I am. I'm fat, not delusional.

eve7166

I get annoyed when I am talk about/ mention something about being F-A-T and whoever I'm talking to says "Oh shut, up. You're not fat" (or something to that end). Yes, I am. I'm fat, not delusional.

I totally agree! Hello Not blind here...people need to stop lying to themselves and other...Im FAT and I HATE it... so im doing something about it! (I love this by the way!)

WifeNMama

Ok. I disagree (there has to be one, lol)

(Here comes the geek) We are not fat. Fat is the substance that causes us to be Overweight or Obese,

I have never heard any medical expert call me fat,,,, obese yes, fat never,

Fat is the substance that we are trying to get rid of to not be overweight,

Adipose tissue is more of a "geeked" term. And technically you dont get "rid" of it, you use the solidified energy stored in those cells and shrink them.

I'm rather less adiposaic than I was in September. :-P

naturallykat

Ok. I disagree (there has to be one, lol)

(Here comes the geek) We are not fat. Fat is the substance that causes us to be Overweight or Obese,

I have never heard any medical expert call me fat,,,, obese yes, fat never,

Fat is the substance that we are trying to get rid of to not be overweight,

Geek no.2 here. Its not negative reinforcement either, unless you have someone shouting "Fat Fat Fat!" at you in the canteen until you choose the salad option Now there's an idea...! :laugh:

I do understand what you mean though. Facing up to what you are right now, and loving yourself regardless is the best thing to start a weight loss journey with

allysonb80

I am fat too. Obese. I find that word more hurtful than fat. But yes I am both. And I have known it for years. But always made excuses as to why I wasn't losing weight. It was too "hard". Well, when I finally lost 360 lbs (divorced my ex) I realized that even though it was hard to lose all that weight it was one of the best things I could do. Now I am working on the next best thing - losing the other 130 lbs.

AlmstHvn

Adipose tissue is more of a "geeked" term. And technically you dont get "rid" of it, you use the solidified energy stored in those cells and shrink them.

@runtrx I dearly love this. We should have bumperstickers: I'm not fat, I'm full of solidifed energy!!

jennajava

I'm not fat anymore, but I was. Kudos to you.

SabrinaJL

It's a descriptive word, like tall, short, thin, blond, bald, etc.

I think the reason people freak out is because fat people are stereotyped as being lazy, stupid, unhygienic, etc. You can be fat and smart and nice smelling and attractive, hard working, etc.

That. To me, getting offended by being called fat would be like getting offended by being called brunette. I am both of those things. And I choose to see it as a fact instead of as an insult. Are there people who mean it as an insult? Of course, but if someone is trying to insult me/hurt my feelings, it's probably not someone whose opinion I give a **** about anyway.

I also hate it when I make a comment about being fat and someone tells me I'm not. Dude, I own a scale and a mirror. I had a friend who would argue with me about it all the time. I'd say, "Yes, I am. I still have X lbs to lose". Then she'd say, "Well I have XY to lose." I always wanted to tell her that just because she was fatter than me, didn't mean I wasn't fat. She's the type that would get all butthurt over that though.

allysonb80

I get annoyed when I am talk about/ mention something about being F-A-T and whoever I'm talking to says "Oh shut, up. You're not fat" (or something to that end). Yes, I am. I'm fat, not delusional.

I hate that. I am fat. I am not blind. I can see what I look like in the morror.

What is worse is when that same person that said you aren't fat, points at someone later and says something about them being fat and you see someone who is less fat that you. Really?!?!

jnbud2002

I was typing the same thing and then saw yours! haha

Exceptional post! And honestly maybe because my hubs and I throw around the word fat and fatty, but I feel that obese hurts more! Especially when add "morbidly" YIKES! Well I'm done being scared of the numbers that are going to pop up on the scale! We, the hubs and I, are ready to be unFAT, hahaha. WE are not DIETING, we are making a lifestyle change. I've learned over the years that dieting is short term. But by changing our life for the better we're making the choice to eat the new way for life.

LET'S GO FATTIES! hahaha Here's to us all reaching our goals!

countrygirl812

Yep, and I am doing something about it.

yoshi91610

So in my experience on the forums and with friends lists there seems to be a general idea that us fat people tend to get offended when we are called fat.

I learned something a while ago.

I use to get offended when people called me fat, you know it hurt deeply *right here* points to heart -. Then I came to a realization; I was and still am fat.

Guess what ? I am not big boned, I am not husky, fluffy, overweight, obese, metabolically challenged, horizontally challenged, chubby, chunky, corpulent, generously proportioned, hefty, gravitationally challenged, oversized, stout, stocky or Plus Sized... I am FAT ... Capital F, A ,T - FAT

While some of the above are more or less entertainment but many of the above are used to disguise, to desensitize and to avoid the big F word.

When I accepted that word, I did something about it. No I am not done, I am still fat, but at least now I don't have some misguided sense of delusion that the world made me obese, no I made me FAT.

So, what are you going to do about it ? Are you fat ?

I 100% agree. I wish the people who cared about you would sit you down and tell you you're fat, you need to eat healthier and be healthier. I HATE it when I say something about my size (not in a demeaning way) and people are like "OH! You're not fat!" and I'm just like :grumble: yeah I am. I admit it. It's ok, to say it, because PRETENDING LIKE I'M NOT FAT is what got me to ignore the problem, it is SERIOUSlY like telling a drunk, "Oh your not a drunk, or wasting all your money on booze" Just to make them feel better, who would do that? No one, you want that drunk to get help, so you tell them "You're a drunk, you need help." But that's more socially acceptable than telling a grown person who you claim to love and care about that they are dangerously overweight and are heading in the direction of many unnecessary diseases.

EQHanks

haha well said. But truthfully I am in denial, I know what I am..just don't want others to tell me they notice too! lol

OLFATUG

I'm not fat, I'm frakin' HUGE