Husband left me because of weight. NEW motivation.

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  • Nana_Booboo
    Nana_Booboo Posts: 501 Member
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    He is a complete jerk! I have been married to the same man for 23 years he has seen me at many different weights.
    He has supported and loved me at all of them, and continues to every day. I think you should consider yourself lucky
    that he is gone. You deserve the best, and he wasn't it. Stay with it and you will do great!

    Ditto (I have the same type of husband)

    Hard road to take but You'll look back and be so thankful.

    Not every person you'll meet will be like him.
  • cramernh
    cramernh Posts: 3,335 Member
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    Lose the weight for you, because you want to. And mail him a picture when you are where you want to be. Good riddance...he sounds like a jerk looking for a reason to justify cheating.

    And when that numbnut comes around wanting you back - tell him to go grab a bottle of motion-lotion for the piss-pump and go back to the psycho ward he escaped from....

    What a ****less wonder...

    Sorry for the profanity but what THAT guy pulled was more PROFANE AND VULGAR!
  • mrscruikshank
    mrscruikshank Posts: 26 Member
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    I got married at 17 and spent 13 years with a jerk of a man. When I gained 54 pounds during my first pregnancy it took me almost 2 years to lose it. Then I got pregnant again. He wasn't subtle about his "fat jokes" and made his opinions very clear. I tried losing weight FOR HIM but I was an emotional eater so of course it never worked. He was verbally, mentally and physically abusive. I finally found the courage to leave him just after I turned 30. I'm 38 now and in July I married my first true love. We dated in high school when I was 110 pounds. The day we married I weighed 250. He loves me for me no matter what. Great guys are out there and that sad excuse of a man didn't deserve me. Yours doesn't either love. You have done an amazing job and like me, probably found that you get better results when you are doing it for you and not someone else! Keep it up girl!
  • cuddlyrunner
    cuddlyrunner Posts: 116 Member
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    he's a jerk, you're just a young thing, my baby is older than you lol!
    Why are you still going to his sister's wedding where presumably all his family will be though???? Will you be ok or will it be weird?
    Good luck to you on your journey, life should be good to you x
  • CarolynB38
    CarolynB38 Posts: 553 Member
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    Wow! He is a jerk. You are beautiful! You show him what you can do but make sure you are doing it for YOU. You can do this. Wishing you all the best with it :flowerforyou:
  • ChattyKitten
    ChattyKitten Posts: 53 Member
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    I'm only twenty. I'm young. I have a lot of life ahead of me.

    I'm pretty excited to be back on here. :)

    You can do it! Do it for yourself! II know it's tough, but he wasn't worthy of you. You deserve to be happy and healthy and everything that comes with it. Smile and know that you are awesome and he is nothing.

    Feel free to friend me if you need a reminder of this ever :)
  • sunkisses
    sunkisses Posts: 2,366 Member
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    The process of losing weight and learning about yourself will keep you feeling awesome when you get low. Besides, being hot and single is fun. Enjoy it. :smile:
  • heathercd
    heathercd Posts: 20 Member
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    Lose the weight for you, because you want to. And mail him a picture when you are where you want to be. Good riddance...he sounds like a jerk looking for a reason to justify cheating.

    I second this!! What a moron - it wasn't because of anything you did wrong, and don't let his negativity tell you otherwise. I was 165-170lbs when I first started dating my husband and last year I capped out at 242. He still tells me that I'm beautiful. He also has gone from about 320lbs to 365 and is now down to 295 and I have loved him and thought he was the most gorgeous man alive at each and every measurement of the scale. We are both now on MFP to better our health so that we can have long and happy lives together! There are better men out there and you absolutely deserve one!
  • pukekolive
    pukekolive Posts: 237 Member
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    You are much better out of this so-called relationship - the man sounds like he has personality issues. It makes me question why he married you in the first place.

    He sounds like a controller and a bully so I am glad in a way it has happened now and not in 10, 20 years time when he had worn you down. You are very young and I hope resilient - take it as a lesson learned, bounce back, lose the weight and don't give the jerk another thought.

    Lose the weight for yourself, don't worry about the wedding or making him want you back - he's not worth your time.

    The universe will send your true man at the right time have no concerns about that.

    Your future will be great - I wish you much happiness
  • Brandicaloriecountess
    Brandicaloriecountess Posts: 2,126 Member
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    What the crap. I'm sorry but he's a jerk!
    You make these changes for YOU!
  • applekoko19
    applekoko19 Posts: 85 Member
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    What a s***tbag!!! I know it sounds trite but you are so so much better off without someone like him. You'll probably be so much happier in the long run without him and that by itself will help you lose weight! 2012 will be a better year for you than 2011 :)
  • fionat29
    fionat29 Posts: 717 Member
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    I can't believe he could do that!! My husband has loved me through fat and thin and fat again and has always showed he loved me. I'm now thin again and he is pleased for me but I never had a doubt in my mind that he would be here for me, what ever..I'm so sorry, my dear, that your husband couldn't see through the excess weight and love you for who you are. We're all here for you if you need us! Fiona xx
  • MaximalLife
    MaximalLife Posts: 2,447 Member
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    I faced the same challenge and managed to hold on the marriage.
    But, if she had left?

    GOOD RIDDANCE!

    You are now faced with reality, and now is the perfect time to create a new you.
    Use this time to totally transform your body, mind and spirit.

    Don't let this rejection define you - let it metamorphose your whole being.
    And at the end of the day, you have the option of moving on alone - a strong, self-empower woman or with another man if that's what you desire.

    You can chart your course TODAY.

    Instead of sadness, now is the time for celebration.
    You have shrugged off the shackles of the old you to welcome the possibilities that lie ahead.

    You are not alone!
    KEEP PUNCHING!
  • willowfyre
    willowfyre Posts: 13
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    That's complete BS. I have a shovel, an empty trunk, and my ability as a Sicilian to hide bodies in the Nevada desert. ;) Just kidding.

    I don't care how many times you've tried and it didn't happen. He should never have stopped supporting you. And to be honest, he cheated because he would have cheated anyway, not because of your weight. That's just a crap excuse from a crap excuse of a man.

    Now is your time to get healthy for YOU. You can do this and you will find so much support here. *hugs*
  • ksimmons19
    ksimmons19 Posts: 223 Member
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    wow that's horrible. You are lucky he's gone. Now you won't have such negativity surrounding you during your journey to healthy!! yay! and you have a great day to look forward to when you see him and you look amazing. AND you can show up with a hot guy to your sister's wedding and really make it sting ;) you're better off, and you ARE very young. Enjoy this time and be happy that you got an out to an obviously terrible marriage and you are now free to choose whoever you want!
  • Lesa_Sass
    Lesa_Sass Posts: 2,213 Member
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    You may not think this now but he did you the best favor EVER by leaving you. You deserve someone that loves you no matter what, plus, being in your early 20s and single ROCKS!

    Lose the weight, get healthy, play the field and have loads of fun! You deserve it, you also deserve someone that is worth of you, not some one that is a controlling mentally abusive ahole, Trust me, I am 43 years old and did not get married until I was in my 30s. I have been there done that in about every different kind of relationship situation there is. Had he not left you, you would have woke up in your 30s one day and ask why in the world you wasted so much time with such a creep.

    Good luck!
  • sailorsiren13
    sailorsiren13 Posts: 460
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    My darling young woman i have been married to a military man for 17 years. He is not easy and when we were young he said some harsh things that he now regrets more than anything else in our life together. He loves me for me but it took a long time to get here. Your Husband gave you a gift by getting out now don't lose weight for him lose weight for you to be a healthy better you. Someday you will find a man who cherishes and adores you in the meantime just enjoy life for you have a long bumpy fun roller coaster ride ahead of you!!!! Believe me i know!!
  • sarscott
    sarscott Posts: 189 Member
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    That's low. Glad you are rid of him and gained us :)

    If you like another friend, feel free to add me!
  • smplycomplicated
    smplycomplicated Posts: 484 Member
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    Noone should ever have to deal with being with someone unsupportive/verbally abusive. This life is hard enough without having to deal with the person that you love making you feel worthless. My Ex Husband did that too. that's why he's my Ex :) I have been married to a wonderful man for 11 years, who isn't perfect by any means, but he loves and supports me through everything.

    Never settle for less than you deserve. <3
  • jalilahbd
    jalilahbd Posts: 9
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    To put it politely, your ex is an idiot and never deserved someone like you. I know what it is like to gain weight and have an un-supportive spouse when you are working to loose it. Forget loosing the weight to prove he's an *kitten*. You already know he is. Do it for yourself. When I started loosing my weight, I found that I wanted to do more, live more, and experience more. I took charge of my life. I lost a person and found myself. I am so much happier too. This is a new chapter in your life, Make it what ever you want it to be. We are all here to support you in more than just your weight loss.

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