Husband left me because of weight. NEW motivation.

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Replies

  • sewedo1
    sewedo1 Posts: 200 Member
    Lose it for you and the multiple reasons it will lead to good and you'll have so much more from life. I'm sorry you've had to go through this but you are going to be stronger!
  • mysticwonder
    mysticwonder Posts: 39
    Congrats on starting your new life. Stress, especially the relationship kind, will pack on the pounds. Glad you got rid of the dead weight.

    Cristin
  • dorkynerd
    dorkynerd Posts: 23 Member
    Thats crazy talk! He is a jerk! You deserve better!
  • chattychick
    chattychick Posts: 90 Member
    He's a douche. You are better off without him. Love is unconditional- otherwise it isn't love.
  • westmountgirl
    westmountgirl Posts: 5 Member
    You're biggest loss (but more of a gain!!!) to date is the 200 lbs (or whatever) of dead weight in that so called husband of yours. Move forward, don't look back! Lose the weight for yourself, never for another person, and especially NOT to "get even". Let that go.... as I see it, he's done you a favour by walking out that door!
  • SamPooky
    SamPooky Posts: 1
    aWW IM SO SORRY THAT U HAVE TO GO THROUGH THIS, I KNOW THIS HAS TO BE HARD ON U SO I AM HERE FOR U FOR SUPPORT OR WHATEVER U NEED. :):flowerforyou:
  • snorktharpe
    snorktharpe Posts: 41 Member
    yep.i hate your ex-husband too. he's a complete narcissistic *kitten* bag and worse, he even managed to convince you that it was your fault that he is a complete narcissistic *kitten* bag. well, he's wrong! its his own fault. you lose the weight, feel fabulous about yourself and then look for a decent guy who deserves you. :)
  • Elfinmajic
    Elfinmajic Posts: 20 Member
    Your husband didn't leave you because of your weight. Your husband left you because he's an *kitten* hole. Feel lucky it's ended now and not after years of heartache. I look at your profile, and you're only 20. He did you a big favor. You can look forward to a wonderful, thinner life moving forward! :)
  • Dbaratta1
    Dbaratta1 Posts: 15
    Well you should not want to be with someone so shallow anyway. I get they we have to be within our weight goals and try to be healthy,,,,,,it sounded like you were trying really hard. Oh well, just think how good it will feel when you meet your goals and r walking around looking hot and want nothing to do with the ex.......
  • brookef81
    brookef81 Posts: 286 Member
    What a sad story and how horrible for you-noone should have to feel that way. He is a jerk (as other people have told you) and he shouldn't have married you in the first place. The only real extra weight that you had was him! Now that you got rid of that, you can work on the other stuff.

    The best revenge is going to be when you have lost weight and you are lookin hotter than ever and he will be kicking hisself in his loser *$$!!!!!

    Good luck and add me as a friend if you want support! I would love to hear how you progress :)
  • NettyB62
    NettyB62 Posts: 45
    I am sorry honey, I think that is just an excuse. If he loved you, he wouldn't have left you, he would be by your side motivating you! What a blow to your self esteem. you have to do this for YOURSELF no one else. YOU come first..to hell with him.
    If there is anything I can do to help..left me know.
  • Newfiedan
    Newfiedan Posts: 1,517 Member
    Not much of a husband if he did that to you, I married my wife when she was heavier and she got heavier still after she got pregnant but so did I, whatever I was in it for the long haul and knew that we would both come around eventually. I loved her when she was heavier and I love her even more now that she has lost the weight, either way I love my wife for better or for worse. I did my best to support her along her weight loss and she did the same for me, a proper marriage should be spent supporting and complimenting each other not bringing each other down.
  • broadwayblues
    broadwayblues Posts: 4 Member
    Just keep in mind that he was just looking for an excuse, and he picked one that would hurt you the most. Keep your head up and realize that he wasn't good for you.
  • RadBarb
    RadBarb Posts: 19
    I guess I will just repeat what many above me said...good for you that he is gone! So glad that you two didn't have a family together and you would have to explain to the the kids that daddy is a fool and left! Do this for you...you are VERY young my dear, and hopefully this is just a bump in the road and a learning experience for you! Don't let it close your heart to other men though. You will find the right man some day who is deserving of what you have to offer the relationship! I am blessed with a wonderful man who met me at my smallest in adult life and is now supporting me to lose weight that I have put on over the last 13 years. I wish you all the best! Just remember, do it for YOU! The benefit is that he will say "oh damn, what a fool I was" when he sees you in September...but it is for your health and well being more than anything else!
  • SmartAlex999
    SmartAlex999 Posts: 30
    Honey, you are beautiful! How dare he treat you the way he did! You are deserve so much better! He is just a sick, sad, and unhappy person to say the least! I am really glad you are on here and sweetie- this "boy" is going to be regretting this decision for the rest of his life because you were the best thing he will ever get. He deserves to be alone for the rest of his life! Stay strong and stay on top! You can do this! Add me as a friend if you want! I am also 20 years old <3
  • LuckyAng
    LuckyAng Posts: 1,173 Member
    Forgive me if I am out of line here, but that is not love. I am so sorry your ex is such an *kitten*#o!e, but you are SO much better off without him!!! I've been with my Husband since 93. When we met, I was 115 lbs (I am 5'10). 18 years later, I was at 209. He has never said one negative thing about it. Not. One. Word. YOU deserve that from a partner too. Do this for yourself, for your health. The side effect of making him regret being such a douche is just a bonus. Add me if you need support.
  • jmehere
    jmehere Posts: 108 Member
    He wasn't worth the effort. He wasn't ready for a commitment. My husband has been with me for 10 years. I was 150 pounds when we met. After I had our 1st child a year and a half later, I was 200 pounds. I continued to gain weight, with a high of 245 ish pounds. I haven't been under 200 pounds for the last 8 or so years until the last 6 months. He has always been encouraging, he has always loved me for who I am regardless of what I looked like. We have had a few moments were I had to teach him that it wasn't ok to negatively motivate me, but he was willing to learn and understand. I'm finally losing the weight. I tried to run him off, but he stuck to me like glue.
    You don't deserve to be treated like that. He left because of him, not you. He had a conditional commitment to you. A condition that he can not control... Please expect better next time around. You don't deserve to be treated well because of how you look, you deserve to be treated well because you are a human being.
  • alisons7598
    alisons7598 Posts: 162 Member
    You deserve someone better then him! That is AWFUL! My husband and I have been together for 13 yrs and during that time I gained 165 pounds!!!!! We have had our share of problems but he never made me feel like my weight was part of it. You deserve to find someone that will love you for you not the you who he thinks you SHOULD be. Become a healthier happier you and show him you are better off without him!
  • charlieduc
    charlieduc Posts: 108
    I am so sorry! I know how you feel. My husband doesn't insult me, but he did cheat on me when my twins were only six months old. I have tried to understand because I know it is tough with me being in school and having two babies at one time, but the trust is gone and I do not know how to get it back. He really hasn't been very supportive, but this time I am going to do it. I have to for my health, my career, and my kids. I am going to see how things go with us and hopefully our relationship gets better, but if not I will have to consider making yet another change. The following quote has been on my mind lately and I am guessing with good reason:
    "if you can't accept me at my worst, you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best" -Marilyn Monroe
    It is something like that ...LOL
    I wish you the best and you deserve to reach your goal and show him what he lost and cannot have back.
  • Klein1475
    Klein1475 Posts: 248 Member
    Darling,

    You do not need anyone who treats you like that... YOU are worth a MILLION DOLLARS just b/c you are YOU... NO OTHER REASON... You are beautifully and wonderfully made... Don't let him or anyone get you down... They are not worth your time or energy it would take to be upset... I want you to go to the mirror and say, "I am beautiful, I am beautiful, I am beautiful... Positive self talk will help you so much... Only use the anger in your work outs to work even harder... Not to prove anything to anyone except you... Keep your chin up... He will realize what he had and it will be too late... Then you find someone who appreciates and accepts you for who YOU ARE not who they want you to be...

    I am sending HUGE ((((HUGS)))) to you... My heart hurts for you...

    Take care,
    Tammy

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