Husband left me because of weight. NEW motivation.

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Replies

  • Johnnyswife
    Johnnyswife Posts: 1,447 Member
    Thanks girls! I definitely will be doing so! For saying he's in the army, he's getting close to being kicked because HE'S gaining weight...! Karma!!!

    I'm really excited though. It's not just about being healthy anymore. It's about being a gorgeous AND healthy woman!
    You are already gorgeous and he is a major douchpickle who isn't worthy of you.
  • IrishMinx32
    IrishMinx32 Posts: 77 Member
    It was an excuse. You deserve better and can do better. I know u want to show off in Sept. But make sure u r thinking about you and your life in general. Losing weight needs to be done FOR U, not for him or anyone else. I just hope if he tries knockin on your door again that u will kick him to the curb. He will never change. Good Luck Hunni, don't rush things, let them happen naturally. Mr Right is out there. He will find u. :)
  • danasings
    danasings Posts: 8,218 Member
    Wow. I don't even know what to say to that! What a d*ckwad!!

    You can do this! Do it for you because you are an amazing woman and are worth it!!

    ^^Ditto!

    There are good men out there...I found one, and in Los Angeles, no less! Knock 'em dead, sweetie! :flowerforyou:
  • jplord
    jplord Posts: 510 Member
    Living well is the best revenge.
  • lisakyle_11
    lisakyle_11 Posts: 420 Member
    Men! ARGH! My ex husband took a video of me walking in front of him, then showed it to me and said 'And you wonder why I don't find you attractive?'

    wtf

    So weird.

    ^^ Yep... insanely irritatingly weird.
  • Robin_Bin
    Robin_Bin Posts: 1,046 Member
    (Didn't read all the other responses.)
    Sounds like he's trying to use your weight as an excuse for HIS bad behavior -- the cheating. And probably to make him feel better about his own weight. You're taking control of your weight, and successfully losing. So he was going to lose his crutch.

    Best wishes on your new, fresh life without him weighing you down!
  • 280days_keto
    280days_keto Posts: 90 Member
    I just want to let you know that you are not alone. Pretty much what happened to you happened to me. Got married young to a soldier cheated on me...always had problems with his friends and my looks..I gave up everything to be with him. But it taught me a great lesson...you have to love and respect yourself before you want someone else to do it too. Then you will find someone who knows your worth and will love and appreciate you as much as you do them. I had to start over and that was not easy at all. But I was blessed with great friends and Im getting through it. As they say sometimes the grass looks greener on the other side. I have now been divorced for three years and I know from him that those few times he thought something better was out there...it wasnt. He wishes we'd worked things out...and realizes how good he had it lol You have to find your inner happiness...be happy and healthy...dont settle for less...love and be loved
  • JMarigold
    JMarigold Posts: 232 Member
    Honestly sounds to me like he had already decided that was his excuse for not being committed and not having enough self control not to cheat.

    40lbs is a lot but its not THAT much. Especially since you lost 20lbs of it at some point.

    If you ask me it has nothing to do with YOU and everything to do with him being an *kitten*.

    Even the skinniest/best looking women in the world get together with jerks who treat like crap and can't keep it in their pants.

    You deserve so much better.
  • KayteeBear
    KayteeBear Posts: 1,040 Member
    Wow, he's a jerk and you didn't deserve that. I agree with ^^^ about him using your weight as an excuse for his behaviour. HOWEVER, if this gives you motivation to make a change, good! You can do this. You deserve somebody who treats you sooo much better and honestly, it's sickening that he'd leave you for that. People who stay married for many years will see weights go up and down through pregnancies and after and if that's a deal breaker for him...good that he left now instead of causing more pain for you.

    You can only go up, right? You'll have a much better life without someone like that.
  • cyberskirt
    cyberskirt Posts: 218
    There is a difference between a MAN and a BOY.

    You, my dear, married the latter.
  • you can do it... your awesome!!
  • Oh darling! My heart breaks for you! You deserve someone who loves you for whatever size you are! Its what is inside that counts, not the outward appearance. You are going so well so keep it up and go to that wedding looking wonderful and show him what he missed out on by not supporting and staying with you! I wish you all the very best and promise you that the right man is out there for you somewhere! He will turn up when you least expect it! Chin up and keep doing what you are as its obviously working! Big hugs! :flowerforyou:
  • nikkiprickett
    nikkiprickett Posts: 412 Member
    wow, that is insane...I have gained about 40 pounds since my husband and I started dating...not ONE single time has he made any comment other than "you look beautiful"
    true love only sees beauty no matter what....his actions with you disgust me, and he certainly doesn't deserve to be happy, and won't be.
    I'm 22 and can't imagine going thru that!


    You def have the rest of your life and you will do fantastic because you now have the support of hundreds!!
    I'm adding you and if you ever need anything or just to talk you'll have many people to do so with.

    Mostly, do this change for yourself above all and let him feeling like the jerk he is. be a bonus :D

    Good luck in your journey, many are behind you!
  • BazAbroad
    BazAbroad Posts: 248
    A terrible story, but I am sure that excuse has been used by many.
    When your young, looks tend to be all in a relationship, as you mature, that lessens,
    whats important is that you can, communicate and enjoy things together with your partner.
    I am sure you are devastated.
    If you can, bounce back,
    do not do it to show him, he is not that important.
    Do it for yourself and your future.
    Fat does not make a person ugly. Everyone has good and bad points. To focus on any one of them and use it as an excuse to leave is just wrong.
  • babygurl48
    babygurl48 Posts: 1,236 Member
    That's horrible, if he really cared he would have been more supportive. You go and show him now that you're going to lose weight and be even sexier!
    This!! Only difference is I have been married to my hubby going on 22 years. You deserve better!!
  • What an absolulte idiot. It's guys like him that give ALL guys a bad name. You can do this. You are very beautiful already, and can only get more so!
  • babygurl48
    babygurl48 Posts: 1,236 Member
    Quoted the wrong quote!
  • beabelieve
    beabelieve Posts: 112
    see marriage should be illegal
  • sphinxdust
    sphinxdust Posts: 59 Member
    Only twenty, boy you do have the world ahead of you! I read your story, and you should just reclaim being happy with yourself, and love yourself. Good luck staying disciplined, I know it can be hard unless you create the proper social boundaries so that others don't influence your progress negatively.
  • ChristineS_51
    ChristineS_51 Posts: 872 Member
    My heart goes out to you, to have this happen when you are so young. I can only add to what is the overwhelming response - he is & was the problem; he used your weight as a justification for cheating / leaving - it says more about him than you. You will be better without him, and whislt it still hurts that he cheated and was not what you had hoped and dreamed for; one day you will feel strong and powerful and in control of your life and your own destiny. This is a start.

    You have the most gorgeous eyes and face - and a caring personality - these things will not change, even when you lose weight and return to the UK. Do this for you; let go the emotional crap about this man, it will hurt you whilst you still care. Onwards and upwards, ((HUGS)) :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: