Is it wrong?

chubbybunnee

So as an update, I wanted everyone to know what happened in the past year.

My then husband, now ex started following me everywhere, started hiding money and lying to me, so I asked for a divorce. He moved out of state to live with his family and within a week, had a new girlfriend who had two kids. We are still going through a divorce that has lasted almost an entire year because he has been hard to reach out of state and we can't agree on anything. But as for me, I met someone else who I now live with and he has shown me what true love really is. He would come to watch me play softball and in my 2nd season, he joined a team with me! For the first time, I have no reason to talk to my guy friends other than to say hi occasionally. I think that a lot of people were right. Even though I never cheated and didn't have feelings for my guy friends, I would talk to them for advice and they were encouraging me to leave my husband, not for the sense of me being with them, but because they all said he was treating me bad and becoming abusive. Now that I am happy in a relationship with my new boyfriend, I don't talk to them as much because I don't need advice anymore, or their emotional support. My boyfriend also has friends that are girls and even has ex girlfriends on his facebook page which he still talks to. I really don't like it, but I know that for me, being with him has made me lose my need to talk to guys or go out in groups unless he's with me. I did tell him how I felt, and he refuses to stop being friends with them, and when I thought about it, it made me think that I was starting to act like my ex and decided to not bring it up anymore. I finally asked him if he wanted me to be friends with them too because I just want him to know that I want to be a part of his life in a positive way, not negative, but he said no, it would be awkard so I should just stay out of it and not friend request them or talk to them. I can see how some people still have a desire to talk to friends they had a connection with weather they are the opposite or same sex. I just know that for me, being with him has "cured" me of talking to my guy friends for advice (because I don't want to bond with them instead of him) and now when I have an issue, I call his mom or sister for advice I'm not judging or saying that anyone who has friends of the opposite sex means they are unhappy with their relationship, but for me, I just know that once I found someone I was happy with, I no longer needed reassurance and advice from my guy friends.

Every situation is gonna be different, but I wanted to thank everyone who commented for their opinions, advice, and support. Negative, or positive, all the comments really helped me take a step back and look at the situation in different ways to help me ultimately decide what was most important to me.

I was able to get out of an abusive relationship and find the man of my dreams who treats me good Even though it may look tacky that my divorce isn't final, my ex and I are finished, living in different states, and hadn't been intimate for a year prior to the divorce so It was easily emotionally to move on. Especially after the threats of him "shooting me in the face".

Thanks again for all your support MFP!