At a loss for words...my journey is put on hold.

sjtreely

I'm the "mistake" child in my family. My mom cried to her mom when she found out that ... again ... she was pregnant with her fourth child. One of my sister's and I are the same age for a week.

My grandmother told her, "Mark my words, you'll love that baby just as much as your others."

And, while I'd like to say I never caused her any grief throughout my teens and early 20's - I did. I'm sure I kept her up at night worrying about my safety. I'm sure I challenged her with my clothing, music, and other choices.

But she loves me.

This past summer we went to Alaska together. I wouldn't trade the memories for any amount of money.

You, too, will have memories with you new little one that you wouldn't sell for all the money in the world.

Mark my words.

FitnessBarbie99

Whatever you do, don't spend the rest of your life telling him/her that he/she is the best accident you ever had. Or (another one of my mom's favorites) hinting that she would have had an abortion if she had the choice.

Those words creep me out and make me feel very unsure about my mother's relationship with me.

Of course, she might be bragging about what a trooper she was to get through difficult circumstances. Whatever the case, be kind.

BlueStar1989

Congrats and don't worry about the weight loss because you know where to come when you are ready to restart your journey. Good luck with the baby

RJG1070

Try to look at it with a different perspective. I don't have any children and it doesn't look like I will be able to. It breaks my heart. Try to fine the joy in this! It must've been meant to be!

ishallnotwant

OP, I Have 5 children. I found out I was pregnant with my last one shortly after having two children 13 months apart. I was TERRIFIED-of labor and delivery, of raising all those kids, including 3 little ones, etc. I had also just lost most of the baby weight from #4 when I found out that I was pregnant with 5. I will admit that I cried when I found out I was pregnant. I was soooo scared. My littlest is 7 years old now and the whole family adores her. I really can't imagine life without her. She is such a blessing. It is hard, I know-and it's scary...but you can do this. :flowerforyou: Take the time to work through your feelings...after having a few kids already, i'm sure you know that once you see the ultrasound and feel the baby moving around in there, it will really help ease your mind. It's such a beautiful thing.

You can continue to eat healthfully and exercise, too, as long as your doc says you can and you have no complications that will prevent it. Because of your commitment to your health, this may just be your best pregnancy yet!

Congratulations to you and your husband.

ETA: Oh, and please please PLEASE stop referring to the baby as an accident. I only planned one of my children but I would never in a million years use the term "accident" to describe any of them. There are no accidents in God's plan.

Skeemer118

ITS TOO LATE NOW HONEY, so get UNlost, and UNconfused LOL

Congrats on your little accident

Wow. :grumble:

kmhallett

Well everyone. I have been working hard and lost 20 lbs, which is great, I am happy. My husband and I found out we had a little accident and we are pregnant. I was just really working hard on trying to lose the weight from our last one. Of course I would always love any baby that comes into our family, but I'm not ready right now, we have 3 healthy children and I feel so lost and confused. I could use some inspiration if anyone has some.

OOPS!
How'd that happen?
Yes, I think I know or sure as heck should.
We had our 2 kids, then OOPS!
Another - number 3, and 9 months after he was born - OOPS!

Here comes another, but NO - TWINS!

Guess what? You'll get through it, and the joy you'll have will make you wonder how you made it so long without them.
Believe it!

And one final thought.
My wife lost all the weight from each delivery, and she is in peak condition today.
After 5 kids!
Worry NOT!

At the right time, you shall get yourself in shape and reach your own goals.

Funny you should say that. My husband was just commenting on ill probably have twins lol

ajburroughs

I completely understand your feelings. My husband had a vasectomy after our 3rd and a year and a half later, I got pregnant. Apparently, it can heal! Talk about shock! We are also planners and struggle to understand when things don't fit our plans. It was hard to grasp at first how on earth I could handle 4 children when I could barely handle the 3 I already had. BUT, all is well, and she is the sweetest little girl. A sweet and funny personality and she thinks she's the boss of her sisters. Yes, that means we have 4 girls so we've also had a ridiculous amount of comments from complete strangers like "oh, I'm sorry she's a girl." Yep, people actually say that. Anyway, I know it takes a little to get over the thought of it but it will be awesome And you won't even know how you could have gone through life without him/her.

Skeemer118

I am appalled at the number of people telling the OP to basically get over it. There is a human being living inside of her that she didn't plan for. She's entitled to be a little shocked.

Once you move past the shock, though... talk to your OB. Mine said you can continue any exercise you were already doing, just don't add anything new or more intense.

^^ Agreed! ^^

veganMomto7

As a Catholic Mom to seven wonderful children I would like to say....Nothing in this life is accidental. This baby is in your life because that is where that baby needed to be. The laws of attraction (or God), whatever you believe or whatever your philosophy, will always bring into your life what you need and this baby is no exception. Except it with your whole heart and never forget that your journey is never on hold. It is just another piece of the puzzle of your life. Enjoy putting the pieces together!

I would like to add that this is a wonderful time in your life to put all the good eating and exercising habits into full gear. It is possible to be very fit and healthy all through your 40 weeks of fun. I know because I did it seven times. I am 4'11" and 105 and it took about six months to lose the baby weight from my last. That is because I stay on a healthy eating plan pregnant or not. Add me if you would like so more inspiration!

sma83

I was waaay over weight when I got pregnany with my daughter. I wanted my baby to be healthy so I changed my eating habits, stopped drinking soda, added whole grains and more veggies and fruit to my diet, and went walking every day twice a day. Nothing strenuous, just a stroll around the block a few times in the mornings and evenings. I actually LOST 60 pounds during my pregnancy. And my little one was perfectly healthy and my Dr said it didnt cause her any harm. As long as you check with your Dr Im sure its fine to keep up your healthy eating habits and light exercise. Just try to remember that this is just a pause in the journey, not the end of it. Congrats on your newest addition.

mizzdivat

While you may not be able to exercise/workout a lot, you can still just walk and continue to focus on eatting healthy. Congrats on the 20lb loss

kmhallett

My husband and I found out we had a little accident and we are pregnant.

"Accident" will make a great first or middle name. :flowerforyou:

Take a look at my user name. Do you REALLY think they were all planned? Lol.

I have no idea, nor do I care to know. Thanks.

This is supposed to be a positive place for support.....dont comment on things that you have no interest in.

dadoffo

Well everyone. I have been working hard and lost 20 lbs, which is great, I am happy. My husband and I found out we had a little accident and we are pregnant. I was just really working hard on trying to lose the weight from our last one. Of course I would always love any baby that comes into our family, but I'm not ready right now, we have 3 healthy children and I feel so lost and confused. I could use some inspiration if anyone has some.

OOPS!
How'd that happen?
Yes, I think I know or sure as heck should.
We had our 2 kids, then OOPS!
Another - number 3, and 9 months after he was born - OOPS!

Here comes another, but NO - TWINS!

Guess what? You'll get through it, and the joy you'll have will make you wonder how you made it so long without them.
Believe it!

And one final thought.
My wife lost all the weight from each delivery, and she is in peak condition today.
After 5 kids!
Worry NOT!

At the right time, you shall get yourself in shape and reach your own goals.

Funny you should say that. My husband was just commenting on ill probably have twins lol

Just curious how is your husband taking it? I know when I got the news that we are having a 4th child my wife was calm and happy and I'm the one that was in shock and disbelief. But I got over it after a few days and after a few months we had a girl. She is 4 years old now and she is a daddy's girl.

kmhallett

An accident? uhh, no.

Uhh yes, we used protection:)

CappuccinoLover4

I completely know how you feel. We had 4 children in just under 6 years. I felt very much the same way & remember crying for a time, but when you think of how lucky you are to have children, especially when they are healthy and in a loving home, you can continue to eat healthy and exercise while pregnant, so you will be able to continue with your journey. Once you have your bundle of joy, you will have good habits in place, more energy for a new baby & will hopefully continue on your weight loss/HEALTHY living journey!
Good Luck to an easy pregnancy!

tladame

I know it's not much consolation but I came from a family of three and I think it's terrible to have three, the middle one (me) is a mess
you're better with four:flowerforyou:

^^
This exactly! I hated being the middle kid and always felt left out. At Disneyland, guess who got stuck riding alone or with a complete stranger? Yep, me! I think 2 or 4 kids is the way to go. Unfortunately for me, I was only able to have one, but she is such a blessing.

As to the OP, just wanted to say congartulations & you'll feel better once the shock wears off. I remember the shock of discovering I was pregnant with my daughter! Surpriiiise! :laugh:

a6ftdiva

I was in the same boat as you! I had lost 60 lbs after my 2nd daughter was born and I was ready to be done...

My husband and I were on the outs and literally hadnt fooled around in over a year (we were getting seperated, or so I thought)

I went out with my friends one night when the baby was 10 months old and came home intoxicated and the next thing ya know I was pregnant with #3

I was totally not ready, I was angry at him because he took advantage of the situation and I think he did it to try to "save" the marriage (he knew if I was sober I would never have done it! and if I was pregnant I wouldnt make him leave as quickly)

I was sooo angry at myself for allowing it to happen and I was sad for my 2nd child because she would lose the attention so quickly. I was worried about money, & I was worried about space (5 of us in a 2 bedroom apt! yikes!)

She was my 3rd Daughter, 3rd C-section, 3rd NICU baby and 3rd time leaving the hospital without my child. I easily forgot all that anger and sadness the moment she took her first breath...

I am so thankful to have my 3 girls, my baby just turned 4 and is so amazing... she is a snuggler and can warm your heart in an instant. She is exactly what I needed and I didnt know it... but God did.

My husband still lives with me, but sleeps on the couch (cant afford a divorce)

I no longer drink to intoxication (a good thing)

And I thank God everyday for giving me three beautiful, healthy little girls....

I hope you can find some peace with all this and I wish you a very healthy, easy, full term pregnancy

Reedern

Don't stress! Easier said than done I know.... a few things I learned during my pregnancy.... I had plenty of extra fat for the baby to feed off of so continue to watch your calories and exercise. As long as the baby is growing and all looks good, it is ok to manage your intake. Remember, you are not eating for 2... the baby eats whatever you eat. I kept this in mind and thru the first and second trimester I lost around 10 lbs.... then only gained back 15 through the rest of the entire pregnancy. Stay on track, and allow yourself to feel good and happy during this journey. Remember that everything happens for a reason and you wouldn't be pregnant if it weren't meant to be! Enjoy the pregnancy and have fun with it! Good luck!

kak2m4

I don't have children, so I'm not sure what else to say about that besides congratulations!!! What a blessing! You can still stay active while you're pregnant as long as you have your doctor's okay - talk to them and see what you can do while you're pregnant! You can also continue to eat healthfully, that way by the time you have the baby you'll have continued to develop those healthy habits that will make losing the weight so much easier!

kmhallett

I am appalled at the number of people telling the OP to basically get over it. There is a human being living inside of her that she didn't plan for. She's entitled to be a little shocked.

Once you move past the shock, though... talk to your OB. Mine said you can continue any exercise you were already doing, just don't add anything new or more intense.

Thank you for understanding. I am not on here to complain or whine or say life is not fair. it just was not in my plan. yes we used protection and we have been married for 7 years. I appreciate everyone with the great advice and making me smile with their stories. If you are going to be rude, just dont post. Their is no need for it.

Switty_Kitty

Strive for a healthy, happy pregnancy rather than weight loss. Your body will snap back even quicker post partum if you take good care of yourself during your pregnancy. And what's a few pounds in exchange for a beautiful new bundle of joy? best of luck to you and your beautiful growing family! :flowerforyou:

Qarol

An accident? uhh, no.

Uhh yes, we used protection:)

Last time I checked, no "protection" was 100%...

daffodilsoup

Last time I checked, no "protection" was 100%...

So she's supposed to live in a sexless marriage unless she is actively trying for a baby? Please.

QueenJayJay

Last time I checked, no "protection" was 100%...

:noway:

Schraudt814

An accident? uhh, no.

Uhh yes, we used protection:)

Last time I checked, no "protection" was 100%...

so wait...are you telling me unless she doesnt want another baby she should stop having sex with her husband??? wow...that's a lovely idea....:noway:

Schraudt814

An accident? uhh, no.

Uhh yes, we used protection:)

Last time I checked, no "protection" was 100%...

so wait...are you telling me unless she doesnt want another baby she should stop having sex with her husband??? wow...that's a lovely idea....:noway:

*unless she wants

kmhallett

He is very supportive. I called him at work today to tell him. he told me this morning to get a preg test to put my mind at ease. He said there is a reason why we are having this child and we will work together to get through it. Hes great:) A bit in shock, but great:)

Qarol

An accident? uhh, no.

Uhh yes, we used protection:)

Last time I checked, no "protection" was 100%...

so wait...are you telling me unless she doesnt want another baby she should stop having sex with her husband??? wow...that's a lovely idea....:noway:

No...just don't refer to a baby as an accident.

robinogue

I know you're still in shock, but congrats on the newest addition coming. It's God's blessings... You don't have to stop your weight loss journey, just up your calories a little more and continue to work out just at a lighter level.