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  • DQMD
    DQMD Posts: 193
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    Dear wife of Person upstairs,

    Yes your kids are really cute and adorable. However, at 11 pm at night I really don't want to hear them running up and down the floor. I know that you don't have a full time job, and the kids sleep late. I do work a full-time job and am up early.

    Dear Boyfriend's daughter,

    You are a very sweet girl and are entirely to hard on yourself. However, that does not give you a free pass to comment on the amount of carbs that I eat, when you will eat 1/2 a container of sour cream in one sitting. Also my clothes may be *dorky* but I have always bought my own clothing and have to stretch my pennies. I also do not dress like a 15 year old like your mother does.
  • clairification
    clairification Posts: 71 Member
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    Dear D-Bag who takes up four parking spots with one car,

    Neither you nor your sub-par vehicle are important enough to hog that much space. What are you compensating for?

    Sincerely,
    Girl who knows how to park
  • misscristie
    misscristie Posts: 643 Member
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    Dear Aiden, (my boyfriends 7 year old son)

    Thank you for telling me that you think I'm beautiful no matter how much weight I lose. You're an amazing kid and you don't even know it. You have such a kind and loving heart. You see the world as a big place full of adventure and fast cars, I envy you sometimes, but I enjoy seeing you so excited when you learn something new. You're polite, responsible, chivalrous, intelligent, and most of all, you're special to me. I know you want a brother or a sister out of your dad and I, but truthfully, I am perfectly happy to only have you. I may not be your biological mom, but I'll come as close as I can. I love you Aiden.

    Rawr (means I love you in dinosaur),
    Your Ashley

    This brought tears to my eyes! Sounds like how my husband feels about his non-bio kid/My beautiful babygirl :)<3
  • delilah47
    delilah47 Posts: 1,658
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    messed up... will try again
  • misscristie
    misscristie Posts: 643 Member
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    Dear coworker who called me thunder thighs last week- I just watched you shovel ramen noodles in your mouth at rapid speed, while I ate my deliciously healthy yogurt. How's your dress fitting today? Ps- you have some broth on your chin.

    What WHAT?!??! Sounds like someone needs to meet a B in the parking lot!
  • TinaDay1114
    TinaDay1114 Posts: 1,328 Member
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    Dear Tina at 15,

    You are not as fat as you think you are. You are not as dumb as you think you are. And no, you do not need someone else to tell you you're special -- someday you'll tell yourself that and mean it.

    And you're stronger than you think you are. You've already been through a lot, and you're still compassionate and loving. You just have a lot of anger and hurt inside. But it's OK. You're not crazy -- your life has been crazy so far, and that would make anybody feel that way.

    Hang on. Life gets better. You'll do a lot of crying and a lot of hard work on the way, but someday soon you'll be laughing, and you'll feel real joy, and you'll be with a good guy who truly loves you. And you'll have 2 kids who love you even more -- and no, you won't screw them up, because you've already learned the hard way how important love is to a kid.

    You're beautiful, and I love you. Really.

    Love,
    Tina at 42.
  • snookumss
    snookumss Posts: 1,451 Member
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    Dear Little Sister,

    Yes, I understand I am on a "DIET" and a very strict one at that, but why do you have to flaunt that while I order a platter of LASAGNA and CHICKEN MARSALA at The Old Spaghetti Factory and mock me because I asked him what the lightest salad dressing was! Yes, I need to know, so I can meet my macros. While you laugh at me, that Lasagna plate was the best thing I've had in a long time and it was carefully selected so when split into thirds it would fit my macros perfectly.

    You may laugh at my attempts, but my 30lb loss and having the ability to outlast you in twister (you being a ten year old and all) means that maybe I might know what I am doing and don't need your mocking air quotation marks for the handsome waiter.

    Your BIg Sis,
    Tamara
  • jldaley09
    jldaley09 Posts: 219 Member
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    Dear Tina at 15,

    You are not as fat as you think you are. You are not as dumb as you think you are. And no, you do not need someone else to tell you you're special -- someday you'll tell yourself that and mean it.

    And you're stronger than you think you are. You've already been through a lot, and you're still compassionate and loving. You just have a lot of anger and hurt inside. But it's OK. You're not crazy -- your life has been crazy so far, and that would make anybody feel that way.

    Hang on. Life gets better. You'll do a lot of crying and a lot of hard work on the way, but someday soon you'll be laughing, and you'll feel real joy, and you'll be with a good guy who truly loves you. And you'll have 2 kids who love you even more -- and no, you won't screw them up, because you've already learned the hard way how important love is to a kid.

    You're beautiful, and I love you. Really.

    Love,
    Tina at 42.

    I love this.. I wish I could go tell my 15 year old self a lot of things also if only she would listen
  • rukia30
    rukia30 Posts: 81 Member
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    Dear MPF friends:

    You are trying to "lose" weight, not "loose" weight.

    Best regards,
    Jim


    LMAO! This was great!
  • hbrittingham
    hbrittingham Posts: 2,518 Member
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    Dear Gym Crush,

    I love how you light up when I walk into the gym. It makes me feel special, something that I haven't felt in many years. You definitely make working out even more enjoyable. I also love the fact that you are so shy that you stumbled over saying hey to me the other day. At least I'm not the only one who feels like they are an awkward 14 year old. Please keep smiling at me, it makes my whole day. Maybe one day we will actually speak beyond saying hello.

    Signed,
    Someone who is even shyer than you
  • radosti1
    radosti1 Posts: 198 Member
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    Dear sweet 6 year old son,

    I know you got confused last night at 12:30am when you got up to go potty and saw that your dad had the light on downstairs and was cleaning up toys. The cleaning lady is coming today and she doesn't appreciate having to wade through a layer of toys while she cleans. There was absolutely no need to stand in the hallways and yell for your little brother and baby sister to get up because it was time to go to school. They both woke up and could not get back to deep sleep. You passed right out. Your little brother cried from then on about every 45 minutes all through the night. And every time I went to calm him down, I had the insane urge to reach up to the top bunk and shake you awake.

    Your baby sister was equally cranky all night. So, next time you are confused, please go downstairs and verify whether it is morning. No need to be the oracle that announces the coming of the daylight.

    Sincerely,

    Your extremely tired working mother who is having difficulty staying away from candy today
  • MKCSFX
    MKCSFX Posts: 24
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    Dear Roadrage Jack@$$,

    I'm on my way to work...at 0630 in the morning...not in a real big hurry to get there. I'm in the right hand lane doing 3 mph OVER the speed limit...

    GO AROUND STUPID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    And yes I know....I am #1

    Driving MS Daisy (according to you)
  • MaryB2
    MaryB2 Posts: 331 Member
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    Dear Lou (stray dog I've been trying to catch for 2 days)

    I really wish you would trust me enough to get in my car. I realize you're probably still waiting for someone that dumped you but you are going to starve or get hit by a car.

    Although I love all the time I'm spending sitting on a curb throwing food to you I would rather get you somewhere safe. Please give me a break when I go back this evening and follow the fried chicken into my car.

    Sincerely,
    Crazy Dog Lady
  • _snw_
    _snw_ Posts: 1,305 Member
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    Dear mfp-ers who have a hard on for reporting me...

    Lighten the hell up. Offense can't be given, it can only be taken. And stop thinking anything i write is being directed at ~you~. It's not.

    Sincerely,
    The girl who's humor/sarcasm is beyond your mental capabilities.
  • ZombieChaser
    ZombieChaser Posts: 1,555 Member
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    Dear mfp-ers who have a hard on for reporting me...

    Lighten the hell up. Offense can't be given, it can only be taken. And stop thinking anything i write is being directed at ~you~. It's not.

    Sincerely,
    The girl who's humor/sarcasm is beyond your mental capabilities.

    Derby <3 !!!
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,229 Member
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    Dear ex-boyfriend/friend with benefits,

    You are currently sitting on my couch snoring really loudly... GO HOME!!!
  • garlic7girl
    garlic7girl Posts: 2,236 Member
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    Dear Jade: my beloved feline Princess...I miss you terribly.
  • EMarvie
    EMarvie Posts: 335 Member
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    Dear Jillian Michaels

    why are you so mean to me...

    yours Shaun x



    ^ this!!!^
  • angel79202
    angel79202 Posts: 1,012 Member
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    Dear coworkers,
    For the last time..I DO EAT..just because it's not deep fried cheese, doesn't mean I don't eat...vegetables are food..also please making disgusted faces when i eat my carrots and oranges..
    Sincerely,
    Cranky Girl
  • jrsey86
    jrsey86 Posts: 186 Member
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    dear woman at the gym doing hip raises with a 50lb barbell,

    Thank you.

    Cheers,

    The guy using three different mirrors to stare.

    LMAO!!!!!!! This was fantastic! :laugh:

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