Dear...

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Replies

  • KaleidoscopeEyes1056
    KaleidoscopeEyes1056 Posts: 2,996 Member
    Dear eyebrow piercing,

    I know I've been doing a lot of sweating and I haven't been washing you right afterwards, but please stop bleeding already. I'm trying to get into the habit of washing you right after I get home from the gym, but I'm human and sometime I can forget. You have to have a little patience, and I will get the habit down soon enough.

    Sincerely,

    I want to puke every time I see blood come from you.
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,228 Member
    Dear eyebrow piercing,

    I know I've been doing a lot of sweating and I haven't been washing you right afterwards, but please stop bleeding already. I'm trying to get into the habit of washing you right after I get home from the gym, but I'm human and sometime I can forget. You have to have a little patience, and I will get the habit down soon enough.

    Sincerely,

    I want to puke every time I see blood come from you.

    Trust me. That is a definite appetite suppressant. I think I will come back and re-read this post whenever I get hungry.
  • KaleidoscopeEyes1056
    KaleidoscopeEyes1056 Posts: 2,996 Member
    Dear eyebrow piercing,

    I know I've been doing a lot of sweating and I haven't been washing you right afterwards, but please stop bleeding already. I'm trying to get into the habit of washing you right after I get home from the gym, but I'm human and sometime I can forget. You have to have a little patience, and I will get the habit down soon enough.

    Sincerely,

    I want to puke every time I see blood come from you.

    Trust me. That is a definite appetite suppressant. I think I will come back and re-read this post whenever I get hungry.

    Glad I could be of assistance.
  • clover5
    clover5 Posts: 1,640 Member
    Dear MPF friends:

    You are trying to "lose" weight, not "loose" weight.

    Best regards,
    Jim

    God forbid someone makes a spelling mistake on your watch huh? Troll.

    Am I the only one noticing the "MPF" here?
    Deliberate mistake or brilliant irony?

    Now it's funny. Thanks Pal.
  • clover5
    clover5 Posts: 1,640 Member
    Dear Teenage boys,

    PULL YOUR PANTS UP! For crying out loud your wearing them on your legs, and they're making your walk like you're carrying a load of crap.
  • 7534584
    7534584 Posts: 38
    Dear Cat,

    I realize it is EXTREMELY interesting that I am on the exercise bike but that doesn't mean you can try to rub on my feet while I'm going 15mph. Accidents happen my furry friend. Leave me alone!

    She is just trying to help.
  • Gwenski
    Gwenski Posts: 348 Member
    Dear self;
    It took you 15 years to put on that extra 150 pounds.. yes, that's 10 pounds a year.. see how it stacked up?
    Please be patient with yourself.. you can lose 10 pounds waaayyyy faster than in a year.. so you are miles ahead!
    Quit thinking that weight loss is a slow process.. you are doing awesome! Be proud!
    And while I'm at it..
    You worked two hours overtime today.. no small wonder you fell asleep tonight.. don't worry you can skip one night of the bike.. it's totally o.k. Your bike will be glad to see you tomorrow and the world WILL keep turning!
    Hugs.. Me.
  • 7534584
    7534584 Posts: 38
    To shoppers in the grocery store:

    I have a back injury. I can do short term shopping if I lean on a grocery cart, but if my shopping will take more than 15 minutes I use a riding cart. When I am shopping, please don’t get ahead of me then block my path. Please teach your children what “excuse me” means when they block my way and stand there and stare at me. Please don’t dart in front of me and expect me to stop on a dime when I know you see me coming. And, to the smart-*kitten* little punk who was showing off to his pal when he bent over, parted his *kitten* cheeks and farted in my face: Your mother would die if she knew how you disrespect others less fortunate than yourself. Not to worry, you will get yours. You may think you are big and bad to a disabled person, but there’s always someone bigger and badder waiting in your future.

    From: The person who is so fed up with being disrespected, she tearily reported you to the store manager. (Too bad we couldn’t find you.)

    (true story)

    Maybe you could drink a lot of Coke before shopping. When kids get in your face you could burp on them.

    My son has Down Syndrome. When he was about 3 we were shopping and it just happened that when we turned the corner a very, very old woman (hunched over) passed by and my son raised his hands and growled at her like a monster. When (of course) we met again at the other end she raised her hands and growled at him. He was scared and almost cried. I almost cried from laughing so hard. Plus, it was nice not to have the "disabled stare"
  • KaleidoscopeEyes1056
    KaleidoscopeEyes1056 Posts: 2,996 Member
    Dear Alex (my boyfriend)

    I love you more than words can say. I know you're stressed out, and I know you have a lot on your mind but it will all be over soon. Words cannot express how proud of you I am. I feel like you don't hear that enough from your own family, so I try to tell you as much as possible how great you do. You make good grades, you're independent, and you're going to graduate soon. You're starting to get a van with modifications that you need and learning how to drive it, which is a big step for somebody in your situation. You're going to be getting your own apartment soon and getting your first job. I've already said this, but I'll say it again: This is a big step for somebody in your situation. You never let your disability get to you, you never used it as leverage over anybody else in order to get your way. You're strong, you're independent, you're brilliant. You're a great man, and I love you. I'm so happy to have you.

    Sincerely,

    Amanda
  • jonbobfrog
    jonbobfrog Posts: 294
    Dear body,

    Please start working correctly.

    Thanks,
    Self
  • JanieJack
    JanieJack Posts: 3,831 Member
    Dear Son,

    Thank you for picking up the 2lb weight and working out with mommy last night. Watching you trying to do my weight tape so you could be with mommy, rather than play with your toys, totally made my day.

    Love,

    Mommy
  • JanieJack
    JanieJack Posts: 3,831 Member
    Dear me,

    Get your butt off MFP and do some flipping push-ups!

    Sincerely, you read about other MFP-ers working out more often than you actually work out...


    hahahahaha this site is so addictive!
  • ESVABelle
    ESVABelle Posts: 1,264 Member
    Dearest Belle,

    He's just not that into you. Get over yourself.

    (and go to bed, you have to be up at 5 to unload a tractor trailer)
  • wittlelacey
    wittlelacey Posts: 391 Member
    Dear Athetic/Muscular/Skinny/Fit/Careless Boyfriend,

    Thank you for reminding me all the time how skinny you think I am, and what not. You hardly know that I struggle on a daily basis with my eating and fitness habits. Those comments make my day and boost my confidence! However, you also don't know that while you think my body is glorious, I hate it. Slowly but surely, I will reach your level and won't be nearly as self conscious as I am now standing next to you. But I have an important favor to ask you. Let me remind you that I go over to your house more than half of the week. And it is because of that my healthy diet is being rearranged. While you don't worry about your calorie intake, going to fast food resturaunts so often kills me. For my sake and yours, let's just have oat meal, rice cakes, pineapple and water when I come over!

    Sincerely, your lover.
  • StevLL
    StevLL Posts: 921 Member
    Dear Baggy Pants kids everywhere,...The only smile I want to see needs to have teeth behind it! Pull'em up already!

    Signed, No Crack allowed!
  • eksims1
    eksims1 Posts: 51 Member
    Dear old women who are customers at my job,
    Please stop asking me when the baby is due. I'm sick of it. My tummy sticks out due to the fact I slouch a lot. Even if I was in the early stages of a showing pregnancy, you should not take the risk and ask me anyway. Quite a gamble don't you think?

    Sincerely,
    The person who helps you figure out what sweater goes with those pants, which for some reason you can't figure out on your own after 60 years of life.
  • annemw82
    annemw82 Posts: 97 Member
    Dear Moose ( my mischievous pug),

    Please stop snorting in my face while I am in the plank position. It is difficult enough without your snot on my cheeks.


    Dear Me,

    You can do this.

    love always,
    anne
  • mego07
    mego07 Posts: 234 Member
    Dear Teenage girls and boys at the gym:

    If you are going to sit on the machine use it! It is not a chair so you can flirt with the cute boys/girls next to it. If you decided to honestly work out please also learn how to use the machine properly. It scares me when you put way too much weight on the machine then proceed to use it incorrectly. You are doing more harm than anything.

    Sincerely,
    Me.
  • CharityPearce
    CharityPearce Posts: 215
    Dear Aiden, (my boyfriends 7 year old son)

    Thank you for telling me that you think I'm beautiful no matter how much weight I lose. You're an amazing kid and you don't even know it. You have such a kind and loving heart. You see the world as a big place full of adventure and fast cars, I envy you sometimes, but I enjoy seeing you so excited when you learn something new. You're polite, responsible, chivalrous, intelligent, and most of all, you're special to me. I know you want a brother or a sister out of your dad and I, but truthfully, I am perfectly happy to only have you. I may not be your biological mom, but I'll come as close as I can. I love you Aiden.

    Rawr (means I love you in dinosaur),
    Your Ashley




    This made a tear come to my eye. What a lucky boy Aiden is!
  • CharityPearce
    CharityPearce Posts: 215
    Dear Baggy Pants kids everywhere,...The only smile I want to see needs to have teeth behind it! Pull'em up already!

    Signed, No Crack allowed!



    Crack kills! : ) Hilarious! And I couldn't agree more. If you can't walk with your legs in normal position, you need smaller pants, and/or a belt!
  • CannibalisticVegetarian
    CannibalisticVegetarian Posts: 1,255 Member
    (Thank GOD someone made this thread.. I could use a vent)

    Dear older brother of mines,

    Why do you want to join MY gym? It's the only place I have to be free from you and the rest of the family. It's my safe haven and I'd appreciate it if you'd butt out---I don't care HOW selfish I sound. You constantly insult me and my weight loss----even to my friends when you are *kitten*-faced---which is every single night! I'm sick of being your little punching bag just because you do the exact same squats each and every day and now have arm definition. Whoopee! (Sarcasm).. So no. I really would rather just seal you in your room like in, 'The Cask of Amontillado' instead. Love ya!

    Signed,
    Don't come near my gym!
  • TinaDay1114
    TinaDay1114 Posts: 1,328 Member
    Dear teenage son of mine,
    There's a reason I gave you a cel phone and I pay the bill every month. It's called "communication". I know you live with your father and there's a time difference, but that's no reason you can't call and leave a message or a text. I miss you like crazy and haven't seen you in almost a year. Me texting/calling you is getting old. This is the only way we are able to communicate and it's very important to me as I've explained a few times already. Seriously.

    I wish your son could read this -- That would kill me too. I've got 2 sons...hang in there.
  • MaryB2
    MaryB2 Posts: 331 Member
    Dear Lou (stray dog I've been trying to catch for 2 days)

    I really wish you would trust me enough to get in my car. I realize you're probably still waiting for someone that dumped you but you are going to starve or get hit by a car.

    Although I love all the time I'm spending sitting on a curb throwing food to you I would rather get you somewhere safe. Please give me a break when I go back this evening and follow the fried chicken into my car.

    Sincerely,
    Crazy Dog Lady

    Aww...thats great your trying to take him in, hope it works out!

    Thank you! I was finally able to catch him yesterday. Just in time too, it has been pouring since last night. I get to pick him up from the vet this afternoon. He was still scared but showed absolutely no agression when I picked him up.

    I'm not sure my husband is as excited as I am. :smile:
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,228 Member
    Dear Lou (stray dog I've been trying to catch for 2 days)

    I really wish you would trust me enough to get in my car. I realize you're probably still waiting for someone that dumped you but you are going to starve or get hit by a car.

    Although I love all the time I'm spending sitting on a curb throwing food to you I would rather get you somewhere safe. Please give me a break when I go back this evening and follow the fried chicken into my car.

    Sincerely,
    Crazy Dog Lady

    Aww...thats great your trying to take him in, hope it works out!

    Thank you! I was finally able to catch him yesterday. Just in time too, it has been pouring since last night. I get to pick him up from the vet this afternoon. He was still scared but showed absolutely no agression when I picked him up.

    I'm not sure my husband is as excited as I am. :smile:

    Aw! Congrats to you and poochy! The hubs will get over it.
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