How Do You Ward Off Evil Spirits?!

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Replies

  • Captain_Tightpants
    Captain_Tightpants Posts: 2,215 Member
    Rationality does not equate to TRUTH.

    No, but it does equate to a more reliable predictor of reality than fantasy or magical thinking.
    (See progress of 100 years of scientific method vs progress of 5000 years of religion as evidence...)
  • bikermike5094
    bikermike5094 Posts: 1,752 Member
    Rationality does not equate to TRUTH.

    No, but it does equate to a more reliable predictor of reality than fantasy or magical thinking.
    (See progress of 100 years of scientific method vs progress of 5000 years of religion as evidence...)

    Whats true is not always taught
    and whats taught is not always true.
  • BeeElMarvin
    BeeElMarvin Posts: 2,086 Member
    I find that human sacrifice works for me every time... um.. yeah
  • QueenJayJay
    QueenJayJay Posts: 1,079 Member
    OP: There's a group called "Christians Unite." You may find more friendly, helpful answers there, and have to weed through less sarcastic, condescending responses. Best of luck! :flowerforyou:

    Everyone else...time and a place for snark. :smile:
  • BeeElMarvin
    BeeElMarvin Posts: 2,086 Member
    OP: There's a group called "Christians Unite." You may find more friendly, helpful answers there, and have to weed through less sarcastic, condescending responses. Best of luck! :flowerforyou:

    Everyone else...time and a place for snark. :smile:

    seems like a good time and place to me.
  • Captain_Tightpants
    Captain_Tightpants Posts: 2,215 Member
    No, but it does equate to a more reliable predictor of reality than fantasy or magical thinking.
    (See progress of 100 years of scientific method vs progress of 5000 years of religion as evidence...)

    Whats true is not always taught
    and whats taught is not always true.

    I wholeheartedly agree. What's "taught" most often is religion. It has to be taught because it cannot stand up to testing and peer review. Teaching is the only way to spread it.

    Anyways. I don't want to hijack the OPs thread with a secular argument so I'll leave it there.
  • BrettPGH
    BrettPGH Posts: 4,716 Member
    you realize there's no such thing. Then any power you *imagined* they had vanishes.

    Thank you for being rational. Next there'll be a thread on how to deal with the monster hiding under the bed.

    Rationality does not equate to TRUTH.



    Ghosts, mummies, vampires, bigfoot, loch ness monster.. do not exist. Grow up. What do you tell your children when they're scared? "Mommy there's a monster in the closet!" "Well hell I guess we need to move!"


    ETA: Ok mummies do exist! But they're not gonna get up and follow you around any time soon.
  • macpatti
    macpatti Posts: 4,280 Member
    By not believing in such retarded bullsh*t.
    Maybe I'll start a thread on how to ward off idiots who continue to use the word "retarded".
  • Dave198lbs
    Dave198lbs Posts: 8,810 Member
    evil spirits are generally thin creatures. befrind the spirit...get their dieting tips
  • Nopedotjpeg
    Nopedotjpeg Posts: 1,805 Member
    By not believing in such retarded bullsh*t.
    Maybe I'll start a thread on how to ward off idiots who continue to use the word "retarded".

    2vw6420.jpg
  • psiren28
    psiren28 Posts: 530 Member
    I love how some of the 'cures' recommended could be seen as 'invitations' to said evil spirits depending on what your beliefs are. So some people think wafting incense about and using herbs will get rid of pesky imps.... you'd have been burned as a witch for those sorts of shenannigans in ye olde good ol' days as it upsets Jesus. It's a minefield... looks like the evil spirits are here to stay unless we can decide once and for all which set of nonsensical beliefs is right :/
  • escloflowneCHANGED
    escloflowneCHANGED Posts: 3,038 Member
    1. Prayer
    2. Speak to those demon spirits & tell them 2 flee & go back 2 the pits of hell from whence they came. You have the power, death & life are in the power of your tongue, so speak to them!
    3. Anoint yourself, your home, your children, husband, pets, etc
    4. PRAY, PRAY, PRAY, PRAY!!!! You hv power!

    So?

    1.Speak to yourself
    2. speak to imaginary things
    3. Waste more time
    4.Speak to yourself a lot!

    I wish you luck...Because you will need it.
  • AlsDonkBoxSquat
    AlsDonkBoxSquat Posts: 6,128 Member
    I've heard holy water, prayer, and sage burning (in a building).

    or you could always call TAPS
  • Aperture_Science
    Aperture_Science Posts: 840 Member
    Tinkle some piano keys. Bill Murray says they hate that, and anything Bill Murray says is golden.

    Brilliant. You win this one! Excellent!
  • Goldenbast
    Goldenbast Posts: 227 Member
    White sage and sandalwood are good (like what was mentioned before). Did you know that traditional Halloween jack-o-lanterns are actually designed to ward off evil spirits and invite ancestral spirits to your home? The didn't only use pumpkins..they used gourds and such.

    If you are not of a Christian persuasion there are many various rituals you can perform to get rid of them, or ask a pagan friend to do a cleansing for you.

    It could also be very negative energy rather than evil spirits, sometimes it can seem the same.
  • escloflowneCHANGED
    escloflowneCHANGED Posts: 3,038 Member
    I've heard holy water, prayer, and sage burning (in a building).

    or you could always call TAPS

    Oh yeah you should call TAPS those guys are awesome and very professional, you could also get your plumbing fixed because thats their day job, kill two demons with one EMF device as they say.
  • AlsDonkBoxSquat
    AlsDonkBoxSquat Posts: 6,128 Member
    And then there are a few people on this thread you could invite over for coffee in hopes that the evil spirits will sniff out their own and just follow them out the door. :drinker:
  • And then there are a few people on this thread you could invite over for coffee in hopes that the evil spirits will sniff out their own and just follow them out the door. :drinker:

    lol
  • escloflowneCHANGED
    escloflowneCHANGED Posts: 3,038 Member
    And then there are a few people on this thread you could invite over for coffee in hopes that the evil spirits will sniff out their own and just follow them out the door. :drinker:

    Haha nice
  • SinIsIn
    SinIsIn Posts: 1,865 Member
    you realize there's no such thing. Then any power you *imagined* they had vanishes.

    Thank you for being rational. Next there'll be a thread on how to deal with the monster hiding under the bed.

    The fvcker I want to get rid of is the *kitten* that always steals that ONE sock from my drier!! :mad:
  • WifeNMama
    WifeNMama Posts: 2,876 Member
    I think this is the longest any thread of religious persuasion had lasted in the forums.

    Clearly people need to learn how to read before posting a comment. Mocking someone for their beliefs is petty and unoriginal.
  • duharvalgt
    duharvalgt Posts: 319 Member
    I have salt water cures in north ,east and west corners and a metal cure in the south facing the Fubar.
  • fatty_to_fitty
    fatty_to_fitty Posts: 544 Member
    I find that farting often helps. We can't see them, but they can smell us. And before you come back and tell me that I'm not being serious, let me just tell you that I have had ZERO problems with evil spirits ever since I started farting. So it really works.

    WIN
  • Captain_Tightpants
    Captain_Tightpants Posts: 2,215 Member
    Mocking someone for their beliefs is petty and unoriginal.

    Funny how it's fine the other way around though isn't it? I get mocked for my secular stance all the time. Can't tell you how often I've had someone tell me they'll pray for me (which, frankly, is equally as insulting as me saying "I'll think rationally for you".)

    The big difference is secularists get insulted by a much larger proportion of the population as opposed to just the 5-10% that we constitute.

    Not to mention political attacks - we often have to send our children to schools where the powers that be have deemed it fit to teach our children fairytales... or we have to vote for leaders that are too scared to lose to not be affiliated with one religion or another.
  • Rationality does not equate to TRUTH.

    No, but it does equate to a more reliable predictor of reality than fantasy or magical thinking.
    (See progress of 100 years of scientific method vs progress of 5000 years of religion as evidence...)
    ^^^ Ignorant! Do some research and see why science, the university, & academia in general were even emphasized during the time of reformation and renaissance. You might be surprised.

    The idea that science and true religion are in conflict has only been around for a few decades, and are not the shared opinions of some the world's greatest thinkers - now and then. The prevailing thought for most of the history of humanity is that they go hand in hand.
  • tomomatic
    tomomatic Posts: 1,794 Member
    I believe that the method varies per your belief system. My family is a hodge podge of buddhist/taoist beliefs that come from the Chinese countryside. I'm Christian but I respect my family's wishes... really just to keep them happy.

    - The Fengshui response: bad spirits can be reflected from your home by putting a mirror over the doorway. If you have a neighbor that you don't like, point the mirror in that direction at their front door and all the bad spirits will go to that house. However, if they put a scissor above their door or do anything to block the mirror with the reflection, then the scissor is a stronger force and will overpower the mirror. Point that mirror somewhere else. Also be aware that other mirrors may be pointed at your hosue. (Those are probably other Chinese families that don't like you). Confront the neighbor to mend fences or put scissors above the door to redirect.

    If you are standing in the doorway of your house, is it directly in line with your back door? If so, according to feng-shui, the good luck is entering your house and leaving the back way. If there's a way to block it using a divider, then do it so that it's not a direct path.

    Anyways, I don't know if this is what you're looking for. Personally, I don't believe in this but I'm very close with my aunt who does practices her beliefs. I've helped to re-arrange her house and even helped her install a rock garden (per the instructions of an overpaid feng-shui practitioner). There's more to it (placing water objects in the house to increase wealth and fortune... landscaping... etc) but this is the cliff notes.

    I promise you that I'm not BS'ing you.
  • Captain_Tightpants
    Captain_Tightpants Posts: 2,215 Member
    The idea that science and true religion are in conflict has only been around for a few decades, and are not the shared opinions of some the world's greatest thinkers - now and then.

    You're mistaking the general term "science", which is probably the most misused term on the planet, with the scientific method. The scientific method and magical thinking are mutally exclusive opposites. One relies on rigorous observation and universally agreed upon standards of testing and modification; the other relies on... well, whatever you like, really.
    The prevailing thought for most of the history of humanity is that they go hand in hand.

    The prevailing thought for most of human history was also that the earth is flat.
  • mrlazy1967
    mrlazy1967 Posts: 285 Member
    I marry them
  • The idea that science and true religion are in conflict has only been around for a few decades, and are not the shared opinions of some the world's greatest thinkers - now and then.

    You're mistaking the general term "science", which is probably the most misused term on the planet, with the scientific method. The scientific method and magical thinking are mutally exclusive opposites. One relies on rigorous observation and universally agreed upon standards of testing and modification; the other relies on... well, whatever you like, really.
    No, actually I'm not. the scientific method was merely one part, one advancement that came about as part of the Scientific Revolution. That's more in line with what I'm talking about.

    The trend of modern science is to look at everything in a vacuum and under a microscope (figuratively speaking). This leads to narrow views and short-sighted conclusions. The major players of the scientific revolution understood that science must be looked at simultaneously with history, the arts, philosophy and, yes, even religion. If scientists are going to discover truth as they so adamantly claim, they're gonna have to look beyond just their labs.

    But of course, today, nobody is going to fund a scientist to go learn history.
  • onedayillbamilf
    onedayillbamilf Posts: 662 Member
    Call a Priest?

    I give up, what's the answer?
This discussion has been closed.