What's ur Best Marriage Advice

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  • breezymom81
    breezymom81 Posts: 499 Member
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    One last thing, when (if) you become parents, keep being a wife as well. In my house kids are in bed by 9 pm nightly and I like to make talking about htem off limits if we can. I was once told that you should be your hubands wife and his mistress! :blushing: Never be afraid to try new things in bed-keep it interesting, set a bse of rules and then try anything else(if you are going to sleep with one person the rest of your life make sure it is fun!)
  • breezymom81
    breezymom81 Posts: 499 Member
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    Men: Memorize the following for all situations, whether you are right or not -

    "yes, dear, I know, its my fault, you're right, I'm sorry, it will never happen again."

    Say this phrase over and over until it is committed to memory.


    :laugh: :tongue: :laugh:
  • jennifermcornett
    jennifermcornett Posts: 159 Member
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    We actually hold meetings every Sunday to discuss what went wrong that week, or if there are things we want the other to apologize for or we want to apologize for. It sounds silly but it works miracles.

    Wow, it definitely sounds ridiculous, but I want to try it anyway!!! :) Sometimes those apologies escape our minds and then remain unsaid. Chances are, the one who needed to hear that apology will still need it long after the "culprit" has forgotten. It would be great to store those in a memory bank and make sure they don't go unsaid. Of course, the apologies could come out before that "meeting" as well, but I think it's a good idea to have the meeting as part of your routine just in case you need it as a backup time to say the "I'm sorry" you had forgotten to say. :)
  • becjerami
    becjerami Posts: 80
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    So much great advice on here that I probably don't need to add anything, but here are my 2 cents worth.

    Make sure you spend time alone together without kids, work etc. It's easy to get distracted by day to day life. Time alone together is really important to strengthen the bond between you.

    Be silly together, have fun!

    If you have an argument, be quick to forgive. Sometimes talking through things will resolve the argument, sometimes it won't. You won't always agree on everything, so you just have to let some things go, especially if they are small things. Keep your eye on the big picture when you can. Try your hardest never to call each other names etc if you are arguing. Those wounds will be remembered, even when the topic of the actual disagreement is long forgotten.

    Before you tie the knot, make sure you've talked through your expectations of your life together with regard to kids, share of housework, money etc. Remember, some of the things you both expect in the beginning will change, because people and circumstances change too, so stay open minded and flexible.

    Always be honest and considerate to each other.

    Lastly, one of my favourite quotes: "Love does not consist of gazing into each others' eyes, but rather looking outward together in the same direction.”
  • Fairy_Farts
    Fairy_Farts Posts: 166 Member
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    Remember that it takes WORK from both of you!

    Continue to date your spouse after you're married. Don't take them for granted. Most everyone needs and wants to feel special.

    If you find yourself in a disagreement, try to stop and think "Is this something WORTH getting this upset about?" or "Do I really need to be right all the time?" or "Will this matter in 2,5, or 10 years from now?" (I'm not so good at this, but I'm pretty sure it would be a good thing for me to practice)

    Have fun together and try to carve out a little time to enjoy yourself on your own. I think it's important to continue to grow as a person, as well as a couple. So spending a little time pursuing some of your own interests may be a nice thing to keep in mind.



    I hope you have a beautiful wedding and a blessed marriage!
  • jennifermcornett
    jennifermcornett Posts: 159 Member
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    Dutch oven at least once a month.

    LOL
    And make it a spicy one!!!!
  • flsunshine
    flsunshine Posts: 188 Member
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    best advise i ever gotten from from my daddy- he said know when to smile and say yes dear... and it works!!!!!!!

    know when to walk away from an agrument- not everything is worth fighting about even though theres things bout him that will drive you crazy just remember theres things you do that are equally irrating

    and communicate- it does have to be on everything little thing but when it comes down to serious decision making it should be mutual unless you or him are in a situation where you have to make the call....

    and theres more to marriage than love- its time, patience, compassion, respect, forgiveness etc....
  • robino419
    robino419 Posts: 29
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    Look at your spouse through rose colored glasses. He is not perfect. He will not do everything the way you think he should. But if you look at him through rose colored glasses those flaws you will see in him won't seem so bad. I know my husband must look at me through them b/c I don't know how he puts up with all of my flaws! =)

    Always be the best friend you would want him to be to you.
  • samf36
    samf36 Posts: 369 Member
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    Always remember no one is perfect that includes you ; )
  • rkgb
    rkgb Posts: 22
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    SEX!!!
    Acceptance - Don't try to change the person you married
    SEX!!!
    Don't sweat the small stuff
    SEX!!!
    Realize you both contribute in different ways to the relationship and that is ok.
    If you can't stand something work around it. He can't wipe the sink down so we have 2 master sinks. We tried a single bank account but I use my card for everything so it is just easier for us to have 2 accounts. That being said he is on mine and I am on his so we know what is going on but it is easier for us.
    Support each other.
    SEX!!! (We have a bottle of lube sitting on our headboard and in the shower)
    Say what you mean and mean what you say. But don't be mean and if you are in the heat of the moment say you are sorry because you probable are.
    Enjoy!
  • everyoung
    everyoung Posts: 67 Member
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    Marriage means a commitment to love each other for worse or for better. Be truthful to each other.
  • donnantx
    donnantx Posts: 76
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    I suck at being married, seriously...but this time I think I got it right! You have to be able to laugh with each other, at each other, do things together and just have FUN! I do a lot of things my husband really enjoys..that I think are just okay and I try to think of him in everything I do....however..he is NOT my best friend nor should he be..I have girl friends for that. Congrats on your marriage and just give it everything you have...it won't be easy..but it can be done
  • Froggy1976
    Froggy1976 Posts: 472
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    Forget never go to bed angry. GO TO BED ANGRY. In the morning, it's likely you will not understand why you were so angry. If you're still angry, there's a problem that needs to be sorted.

    I have never woken up still angry.
    ^^This is good advice. While I rarely wake up still mad it does happen sometimes and that is when the talking begins. Married for 15 years now so something is working.
  • juleseybaby
    juleseybaby Posts: 712 Member
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    Didn't read every page - so sorry if this is duplicate advice.

    Don't go in thinking you will change something about him 'after' you get married. Yes - people can change - but they have to WANT to change. If there is something you don't like about him now - you will not like it in a few years - and it won't go away unless HE decides he doesn't like it either.

    Totally agree with all the advice to communicate, have sex, date night, more sex, have fun... did I mention SEX???

    One last thing... and I find this one difficult... Try to be each other's everything without losing your sense of self.

    Oh - and have LOTS and LOTS of SEX!
  • Terrymichelle
    Terrymichelle Posts: 49 Member
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    Just celebrated my 2 yr anniversary with my husband this week. We found out quickly that first God is there and will get you through anything. and don't smoother eachother.
    Give eachother space
    Don't Nit Pick or Nag(This is the biggest mistake for girls, The ones I know at least)
    Enjoy him
    Be selfless
    Don't feel like your his mother.

    It is working perfectly for us, Happy to say I am still the happiest girl in the world!!!!!
  • mello
    mello Posts: 817 Member
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    Two words: Mutual Respect

    It goes a long way towards making a relationship work.
  • mello
    mello Posts: 817 Member
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    6. Don't tell your family and friends everything wrong with your relationship.

    Oh, yes this is a good one! I have never, ever been one to ring up my mother or MIL to dish about my husband. They were very resentful of it for years, because apparently that's how it should be done? (I don't get it but it was brought up to me by both of them.) Anyway, later, when my brother got married, his wife DID do that and my mother really came to appreciate not getting those calls from me. And I have never had to worry about anyone butting into my relationship (married 18 years!)

    Wow....this one!!!

    I'm the same way, our marriage is our marriage, whatever issues there are, we deal with. I've been married 13 yrs and have never called my mother, sister, friends to dish the dirt on him. I put this one right back under the respect thing......I wouldn't want him calling his mom telling her every detail or problem that might come up, so I give him and our relationship the same respect.
  • 10acity
    10acity Posts: 798 Member
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    and start doing daily temperature readings
    http://www.smartmarriages.com/tempreading.html

    Some of the best advice I can think of is... don't listen to ^this^ guy.
  • becjerami
    becjerami Posts: 80
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    Oh, I forgot you add, make sure you also SPEND TIME APART! I don't mean days or weeks on end, but I think it helps if you keep some hobbies and friends separate, otherwise you won't have anything new to talk about and easily get bored of each other!
  • morganhccstudent724
    morganhccstudent724 Posts: 1,261 Member
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    "Marriage Advice From 1886″
    Never go to bed angry.
    Let your love be stronger than your hate or anger.
    Learn the wisdom of compromise, for it is easier to bend a little than to break.
    Believe the best rather than the worst.
    People have a way of living up or down to your opinion of them.
    Remember that true friendship is the basis for any lasting relationship.
    The person you choose to marry is deserving of the courtesies and kindness you bestow on your friends.
    Please pass this on to your children and their children’s children. The more things change the more they are the same.

    I think this is awesome :heart:

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