snobbish on MFP?

WickedGarden

I'm on several different forums.

for weight loss, this one BY FAR is the most active. i got some snarky comments on a different site when I asked a completely innocent question about weight loss. So I haven't been back there. I don't need the toxicity.

ALL forums have their trolls, snobs, whiners etc. If I see trouble brewing, I TRY to stay away. Sometimes I just get angry and have to put in my $0.02.

Just look at it this way, people are behind a computer screen, so we can't see them, we can't make judgements about them, so they feel they can let it all out. We don't know them, where they work or live...the internet is a 'safety' place.

BTW...I am a snob...a cupcake snob.

TexasGirl_Amie

I'm totally a snob to people who leave a snail trail on the machines or don't wipe down equipment after use! :sick: :noway:

kennethmgreen

I've been on here regularly now for a week and have read some cool stuff. Also I've noticed that some people seem so stuck up!

I am regularly baffled by the online behavior I see on MFP. Not the mean stuff, or the snob stuff or the name calling or the arguing - I see that on every. single. Internet. forum. I've. ever. belonged. to. I am baffled by the ratio of "why are people so mean/rude/snobbish" threads to the amount of meanness/rudeness/snobbery I actually see on the forum.

MFP is tame by Internet forum standards. At least the forums I've participated in. Does MFP attract a lot of people that haven't participated in online forums before? Or is there a correlation between weight loss and hypersensitivity? I really don't understand. Do we get our feelings hurt more when we're hungry?

OP, what is the expected result of starting a thread like this? I'm not trying to be mean or snobbish or trying to ridicule. I am genuinely curious.

maidentl

I am regularly baffled by the online behavior I see on MFP. Not the mean stuff, or the snob stuff or the name calling or the arguing - I see that on every. single. Internet. forum. I've. ever. belonged. to. I am baffled by the ratio of "why are people so mean/rude/snobbish" threads to the amount of meanness/rudeness/snobbery I actually see on the forum.

MFP is tame by Internet forum standards. At least the forums I've participated in. Does MFP attract a lot of people that haven't participated in online forums before? Or is there a correlation between weight loss and hypersensitivity? I really don't understand. Do we get our feelings hurt more when we're hungry?

OP, what is the expected result of starting a thread like this? I'm not trying to be mean or snobbish or trying to ridicule. I am genuinely curious.

It is weird. It's like every forum newbie in the world makes their way here.

EmpressOfJudgment

I've been on here regularly now for a week and have read some cool stuff. Also I've noticed that some people seem so stuck up!

I am regularly baffled by the online behavior I see on MFP. Not the mean stuff, or the snob stuff or the name calling or the arguing - I see that on every. single. Internet. forum. I've. ever. belonged. to. I am baffled by the ratio of "why are people so mean/rude/snobbish" threads to the amount of meanness/rudeness/snobbery I actually see on the forum.

MFP is tame by Internet forum standards. At least the forums I've participated in. Does MFP attract a lot of people that haven't participated in online forums before? Or is there a correlation between weight loss and hypersensitivity? I really don't understand. Do we get our feelings hurt more when we're hungry?

OP, what is the expected result of starting a thread like this? I'm not trying to be mean or snobbish or trying to ridicule. I am genuinely curious.

Excellent post and observation, my friend. I would have to agree. I was on a music message board awhile back and it got far more brutal than anything I have ever seen here. I, too, wonder why people are so sensitive here. Perhaps it is because of the lack of previous message board experience. The only message board I've ever been on where the people were always civil to one another was a vegetarian message board I was on several years ago. Every other one was constant bickering and bullying. You just have to have a thick skin and learn to ignore the things you don't like. Otherwise, if you speak out against those things, prepare yourself for some backlash (that's where the thicker skin comes into play).

I do like your second thought too. Maybe people are just more sensitive when they want a piece of pizza and they can't have it. If I'm hungry and b*tchy I am far more likely to call out someone who is being an idiot in a thread. Add that to the fact that weight-loss message boards are a magnet for insecure people and you have a calorie free recipe for disaster.

Nerdy_Rose

I am definitely a stuck-up b*tch.

BigDaddyBRC

I am definitely a stuck-up b*tch.

LIES!!!!!!!!!!!! You are a HOT, stuck-up B*TCH

feb06momma

I have been posting here for close to two months on a regular basis. I have not ever felt anyone was being less than supportive or snobby towards me. I have over 100 pals cheering me on. How cool is that?! I am sure there are those that are less than friendly, but you get that anywhere.

rtaddlowe

I've been on here regularly now for a week and have read some cool stuff. Also I've noticed that some people seem so stuck up!

I'll have my people get a hold of your people and sort this bad manner thing out! HAHA

JK, I hope you find a lot of cool people on here because I think it is a cool site with a lot of cool people.

CalJur

You are going to make a ton of friends with this forum. Seriously MFP is nothing more than a reflection of life. Outside MFP there are snobs too. That's life. Fortunately you can pick and choose who to associate with and who not to.

nerdyandilikeit

I've been on here regularly now for a week and have read some cool stuff. Also I've noticed that some people seem so stuck up!

I am regularly baffled by the online behavior I see on MFP. Not the mean stuff, or the snob stuff or the name calling or the arguing - I see that on every. single. Internet. forum. I've. ever. belonged. to. I am baffled by the ratio of "why are people so mean/rude/snobbish" threads to the amount of meanness/rudeness/snobbery I actually see on the forum.

MFP is tame by Internet forum standards. At least the forums I've participated in. Does MFP attract a lot of people that haven't participated in online forums before? Or is there a correlation between weight loss and hypersensitivity? I really don't understand. Do we get our feelings hurt more when we're hungry?

OP, what is the expected result of starting a thread like this? I'm not trying to be mean or snobbish or trying to ridicule. I am genuinely curious.

Excellent post and observation, my friend. I would have to agree. I was on a music message board awhile back and it got far more brutal than anything I have ever seen here. I, too, wonder why people are so sensitive here. Perhaps it is because of the lack of previous message board experience. The only message board I've ever been on where the people were always civil to one another was a vegetarian message board I was on several years ago. Every other one was constant bickering and bullying. You just have to have a thick skin and learn to ignore the things you don't like. Otherwise, if you speak out against those things, prepare yourself for some backlash (that's where the thicker skin comes into play).

I do like your second thought too. Maybe people are just more sensitive when they want a piece of pizza and they can't have it. If I'm hungry and b*tchy I am far more likely to call out someone who is being an idiot in a thread. Add that to the fact that weight-loss message boards are a magnet for insecure people and you have a calorie free recipe for disaster.

I really dislike people losing weight must be hungry kinds of responses. I can see the merit in a joke situation, but I find it lame. You don't have to be hungry to lose weight. Sure, lots of people choose that route hoping it will get them where they want to be faster, but it's still a weak joke. Maybe I think that because it's so unoriginal on a fitness site? *shrugs*

That being said, this is my first internet forum experience, and I can get sensitive. But I'm generally sensitive in real life, about anything that's dear to me (otherwise not so much), so it doesn't necessarily mean anything directly relating to the internet. I've definitely learned to have thicker skin, and I've translated that into thicker skin in my other internet interactions, too. If you can't learn that, that's on you.

I think feeling vulnerable or having low self esteem could very well be the reason why most of us are here, and that could contribute to whiners and other generally offended people, sure. Maybe people develop thicker skin in correlation to how fast they develop more confidence and self esteem by becoming more fit in some cases?

Good points, both of you!

EmpressOfJudgment

Thanks for calling me lame, Bron.

That is to say, you are mean. Stop bullying me.

Karleyyy

Yes, that I get. However seems like there are a lot more than usual, otherwise I wouldn't have mentioned it.

Nope, it is the same everywhere. People aren't unique in one place versus another.

nerdyandilikeit

Thanks for calling me lame, Bron.

That is to say, you are mean. Stop bullying me.

Actually, Ken started it. He's lame.

No, that's a lie.

lind3400

It's an observation. If your insulted then that's on you.

Pot? Kettle!

YAY!!! Someone remembered to post this!!!

mugsy1335

EXACTLY MY THOUGHTS!!! LOL

FlyByJuly

I'm a buttercream snob.

I'm very picky about buttercream.

Totally off-topic, but I am in complete awe of your back!

Rays_Wife

I love this place but I hate all the people who don't think like I do. Especially the ones who are not supportive. And the ones who stink. I didn't know that my computer had smell-o-vision and I don't know how to turn it off so I need to tell you that some of you folks are real stinkeroos. Whew! But, mostly I totally love this place except for the people I don't like and there seem to be an awful lot of those. And the stinkers. So to sum up: love hate stink.

:laugh: :drinker:

treetop57

Take what you can use and leave the rest.

Brightstar4031

I've been on here regularly now for a week and have read some cool stuff. Also I've noticed that some people seem so stuck up!

I am regularly baffled by the online behavior I see on MFP. Not the mean stuff, or the snob stuff or the name calling or the arguing - I see that on every. single. Internet. forum. I've. ever. belonged. to. I am baffled by the ratio of "why are people so mean/rude/snobbish" threads to the amount of meanness/rudeness/snobbery I actually see on the forum.

MFP is tame by Internet forum standards. At least the forums I've participated in. Does MFP attract a lot of people that haven't participated in online forums before? Or is there a correlation between weight loss and hypersensitivity? I really don't understand. Do we get our feelings hurt more when we're hungry?

OP, what is the expected result of starting a thread like this? I'm not trying to be mean or snobbish or trying to ridicule. I am genuinely curious.

I was inquiring others opinions... Honestly it struck me as snobbish when reading several profiles that had stipulations on friend requests and such and I found it overwhelming... I think it's not black and white. It's ok that I have an opinion just like everyone else right?

Darkskinned88

i have noticed some people (the ones who have lost the weight already) suddenly become a lot more picky about their friends, have patronizing sarcastic replies but its w.e personality types on a social media site isnt exactly old news

EmilyMae12

I have seen quite of few "snobs" on here, except I find that the people I am friends with and most of the other are genuinely down to Earth and supportive.

TeresaC79

I'm far from insulted.

I just always find it odd and off putting when someone who has just joined a place comes in immediately with complaints and judgements then feels like they need to verbalize them to a group of strangers.

Maybe you have encountered some threads that you can't read the tone on. Maybe you are misinterpreting. Are there people here who believe that their way is the superior way? Of course, it is the internet and isn't any more true here then anywhere else on the internet.

I just can't believe that people feel comfortable coming in, on post 3 or 4 and immediately feeling they can jump in, criticize, and judge.

Had you searched the forums? Because you will see a hundred of these same judgmental threads. You are no better then the "snobs" you complain about, you just have a different vice. Being judgmental.

KJVBear33

To be honest, I have not read ALL the posts here, but here is my take on things: You truly don't know where everyone is at and how they are feeling.......sometimes when we feel negative or defeated ect, we are a little cranky and just are here to let it all hang out. Everyone here knows this at one point or another. Either the issue gets resolved or it doesn't and if it doesn't it causes a multitude of attitudes, opinions, and tempers to collide. All anyone on here can do is to learn that, if they are having a bad day or are frustrated with something to say that that's the reason if someone misinterprets them and their words. But because we don't think "oh well, Im in a snarky mood....I need to say so so no one here gets offended"--aka labeling the MIGHT BE misinterpreted tone of the post that they are posting--thats how it usually comes about, if I am not mistaken?

Also, I think that everyone on here is on a level playing field, which means social statuses get screwed around with. Some people might think that they see an opportunity to try to be the most popular on the site or something and they feel like the only way to do that is to be the most opinionated person around.......BUT I could totally be wrong on this AND would totally be willing to admit to it. And this doesn't mean that I think that any one person on here thinks like this........only because I don't know them personally. I just seem to think that the fact that we are on a level playing field and all here trying to do the same thing, is really looked at as the one place they can come out on top. I know for myself, I was never popular in highschool, but simply put me in a room with people like me and I try to be the most outgoing person there is to try to make friends and have a group of people around me. That's all I am trying to get at here.

mrmanmeat

It's an observation. If your insulted then that's on you.

You're, not your.

Meganalva

What's the point of posting this? I mean, really? Asking for attention much? ugh.

Amy911Gray

If we are all here to gain support for the insurmountable and overwhelming task of changing our lifestyles and getting healthy...why can't everyone just keep the criticisms to a minimum. There is a way to point out a better way of doing things, however, the process of putting on your shoes doesn't have to be an argument...

It's either a sock and a sock and a shoe and a shoe OR a sock and a shoe and a sock in a shoe. As Meathead put it--best to put on a sock and a shoe and a sock and a shoe in the northern states just in case of an evacuation during the winter. You can hop around and keep both feet dry.

Of course if you don't wear socks, you have a different process....

LorinaLynn

I am regularly baffled by the online behavior I see on MFP. Not the mean stuff, or the snob stuff or the name calling or the arguing - I see that on every. single. Internet. forum. I've. ever. belonged. to. I am baffled by the ratio of "why are people so mean/rude/snobbish" threads to the amount of meanness/rudeness/snobbery I actually see on the forum.

MFP is tame by Internet forum standards. At least the forums I've participated in. Does MFP attract a lot of people that haven't participated in online forums before? Or is there a correlation between weight loss and hypersensitivity? I really don't understand. Do we get our feelings hurt more when we're hungry?

OP, what is the expected result of starting a thread like this? I'm not trying to be mean or snobbish or trying to ridicule. I am genuinely curious.

This, exactly. I don't understand how people don't understand that within any group of people, there's going to be like-minded individuals who tend to flock to each other. I wouldn't have stuck around on here if I hadn't met and bonded with people who have similar beliefs and habits.

I was inquiring others opinions... Honestly it struck me as snobbish when reading several profiles that had stipulations on friend requests and such and I found it overwhelming... I think it's not black and white. It's ok that I have an opinion just like everyone else right?

When I first joined, there was a 250 friend limit. I thought it was crazy at the time that some folks had stipulation on who'd they accept friend requests from, because I couldn't imagine having anywhere NEAR that amount. After about a year of steady posting and accepting FR's, I hit the new limit of 1000, and had to delete inactive ones to make room for new ones. It's a damned if you do, damned if you don't situation. If you don't accept or have limits on who you accept, you're a snob. If you accept everyone, you're a friend-collecting attention *kitten*.

As it is, I can't keep up with everyone on here, but I'm more active on the forums than the walls. If someone wants to friend me to follow what I have to say, that's great. But I'm not able to read folks' food diaries or keep up with every status update.

davekarie

What's the point of posting this? I mean, really? Asking for attention much? ugh.

Way to steal her thunder and grab some of that attention for yourself!
*high five*

KJVBear33

What's the point of posting this? I mean, really? Asking for attention much? ugh.

Not to sound judgemental, but what's the point of even posting this response? Seems to me that thats exactly what you are doing.....she was only asking a simple question. Like she said, it was only an observation. Yes, a lot of people have had similar threads like this, yes it doesn't need to be said a billion times, and yes I agree that she needs to see how the boards flow......but really, what's the point in keeping questions to ourselves? Aren't we all supposed to be helpful and supportive? And its not like she is calling anyone out and saying "HEY EVERYONE HERE IS SNOBBISH". I could see the attitudes here being like they are as I have read some posts on here IF she did call out certain people and called them snobbish......but she didn't.

Point being, people really ought to understand that she was merely just curious and meant no harm. I myself certainly did not take offense because I know she didn't really mean me.