Public Transportation & Giving up your seat

slkehl

Guys don't give up their seats for girls on the busses at my school. It would be nice but I don't really expect it. Sadly I'd feel kinda awkward if a guy did, like he was trying to make a move or something.

I think people should absolutely give up seats for the elderly and for anyone who seems to have some kind of disability.

thepetiterunner

I just figure I'm young and healthy, active and in good shape so I don't need the chair as much as others do.

Then why do you need someone to give it up for you?

I don't NEED them to. I never said I would necessarily take it, if offered. I'd leave it for someone else who needed it more. But the offering is polite and courteous.

EmCarroll1990

You offer your seat to a lady. Period.

I'd like to smack that kid. Some 19 year old futzing with his iPod and wants some old woman to stand while he sits comfortably. That's not a man. That's a little boy who could use some manners.

Bull****...

I ride the train everyday. And readily give up my seat to pregnant women, women with small children, anyone with a cane or obvious handicap... even a really old frail looking person. I am the first to offer up my seat. Or if someone asks, sometimes you dont feel well and really want a seat, people ask and I will stand.

But ANY lady? That is just plain craziness. She and I both worked all day, and I happened to be lucky enough to score a seat for 20 minutes. Such are the breaks we are all equal in the world! I actually think offering your seat to an able bodied woman other then some lame attempt to hit on her should be considered an insult to her. why does she need your seat, is her vagina too heavy to stand with?

Did you spend your day in heels, like women are "supposed" to in the business world?

I take the bus or train almost everyday, and its almost always elderly men that ever offer me their seat.

For what its worth, I always decline. I consider myself a huge feminist and it isn't an insult for a GENTLEMAN to treat you like a lady.

I only wear heels on the weekend... but I might have spent half the day climbing bridges or crawling through a tunnel. Sorry your shoes hurt, bring some sneaker for the commute

Sorry...I have to agree. We wear heels by choice. Regardless of who expects us to, it's a choice we make. And I also agree that, while it may be gentleman like, there is no need for a man to offer his seat to any woman who comes through the door. Now hold the door open, or the elevator door, that is always appreciated, but I do the same if I'm the first one there.

It's not about "need." It's about being polite. I don't need a man to open a door for me, to pull out my chair for me, to pay for my dinner, to walk me to my door. But I sure as hell have a lot more respect for one who does, just as I would imagine that gentlemen who do these things for ladies have more respect for women who smile and say 'Thank you' rather than scowl and call them sexist.

Exactly. Honestly, would you women rather live in a world where it's all for one, no one helping anyone? I sure as hell would not. We are one world, why not be polite, courteous, and respectful to those around us?

I just don't get why being polite is a one way street that only applies to men.

It most definitely does not, at least not for me. I hold doors open for everyone, male or female. I give respect to everyone on the first encounter, it just how I was raised.

grinch031

You offer your seat to a lady. Period.

I'd like to smack that kid. Some 19 year old futzing with his iPod and wants some old woman to stand while he sits comfortably. That's not a man. That's a little boy who could use some manners.

Bull****...

I ride the train everyday. And readily give up my seat to pregnant women, women with small children, anyone with a cane or obvious handicap... even a really old frail looking person. I am the first to offer up my seat. Or if someone asks, sometimes you dont feel well and really want a seat, people ask and I will stand.

But ANY lady? That is just plain craziness. She and I both worked all day, and I happened to be lucky enough to score a seat for 20 minutes. Such are the breaks we are all equal in the world! I actually think offering your seat to an able bodied woman other then some lame attempt to hit on her should be considered an insult to her. why does she need your seat, is her vagina too heavy to stand with?

Did you spend your day in heels, like women are "supposed" to in the business world?

I take the bus or train almost everyday, and its almost always elderly men that ever offer me their seat.

For what its worth, I always decline. I consider myself a huge feminist and it isn't an insult for a GENTLEMAN to treat you like a lady.

I only wear heels on the weekend... but I might have spent half the day climbing bridges or crawling through a tunnel. Sorry your shoes hurt, bring some sneaker for the commute

Sorry...I have to agree. We wear heels by choice. Regardless of who expects us to, it's a choice we make. And I also agree that, while it may be gentleman like, there is no need for a man to offer his seat to any woman who comes through the door. Now hold the door open, or the elevator door, that is always appreciated, but I do the same if I'm the first one there.

It's not about "need." It's about being polite. I don't need a man to open a door for me, to pull out my chair for me, to pay for my dinner, to walk me to my door. But I sure as hell have a lot more respect for one who does, just as I would imagine that gentlemen who do these things for ladies have more respect for women who smile and say 'Thank you' rather than scowl and call them sexist.

Exactly. Honestly, would you women rather live in a world where it's all for one, no one helping anyone? I sure as hell would not. We are one world, why not be polite, courteous, and respectful to those around us?

I just don't get why being polite is a one way street that only applies to men.

It most definitely does not, at least not for me. I hold doors open for everyone, male or female. I give respect to everyone on the first encounter, it just how I was raised.

There are many posters in this thread who believe only men are required to be polite. When asked why men should give up their seat to healthy women, the only answer they can come up with is "because its polite". That implies women are not required to be polite.

WickedGarden

I'd call her a c*nt.

I think I'd get along with you. :laugh:

I've actually done this...some lady was struggling with her wandering kid and a bunch of shopping bags, so I held the door open for her, she just glared at me so I said "you're welcome you ungrateful bitc#, next time I'll just let the door hit you on the way out"

Carl01

These are the reasons guys end up bald,sitting in a chair and staring into space.:laugh:

Honestly though it is about evenly split among ladies posting that think offering a seat simply for the fact it is a woman is the right or polite thing and those that find it to be silly.

How is a guy to know which is which in a given circumstance?

Donnacoach

Total disrespect!! Even as a girl, I give up my seat if there is an elderly person that needs a seat. Good Lord these kids have no morals to speak of.

Munque

I would gladly give up my seat for anyone who needs it, fortunately we have no public transportation in my little town, but I know that at dr. offices or restaraunts when there is a long wait, my husband will always, every single time, stand so a female can sit, not because he thinks that they are the weaker sex, because he's a gentleman, and knows that women should be respected. I stand too, because I'm able and I prefer to be where my husband is.

When I was pregnant, I don't ever remember having to stand to wait for anything I was always offered a seat by men and women alike.

But these days, I can go someplace with my disabled daughter who very obviously has trouble standing for long periods of time (left side paralysis) and I have never had anyone offer her a seat.

grinch031

These are the reasons guys end up bald,sitting in a chair and staring into space.:laugh:

Honestly though it is about evenly split among ladies posting that think offering a seat simply for the fact it is a woman is the right or polite thing and those that find it to be silly.

How is a guy to know which is which in a given circumstance?

Use common sense. If a woman is pregnant or walking with a cane or is holding an infant, give her your seat. Same goes with another man who has a cane or is holding an infant. I hate treating people different solely because of their gender. That is not consistent with what being equal is all about.

Tashry

You offer your seat to a lady. Period.

I'd like to smack that kid. Some 19 year old futzing with his iPod and wants some old woman to stand while he sits comfortably. That's not a man. That's a little boy who could use some manners.

Kudos to you, sir! Why weren't there any men like you on the sky train when I was 9 months pregnant and could barely stand? Not a single man would give up their seat for me. Another woman finally did, and with a look of disgust to all the many capable men around us.

Kids today need to learn some respect. Believe it or not, there are other people who need some consideration. Not only your "needs" matter.

lickmybaconcakes

These are the reasons guys end up bald,sitting in a chair and staring into space.:laugh:

Honestly though it is about evenly split among ladies posting that think offering a seat simply for the fact it is a woman is the right or polite thing and those that find it to be silly.

How is a guy to know which is which in a given circumstance?

Use common sense. If a woman is pregnant or walking with a cane or is holding an infant, give her your seat. Same goes with another man who has a cane or is holding an infant. I hate treating people different solely because of their gender. That is not consistent with what being equal is all about.

^ A good representation , I wish more people abided by this.

ncahill77

These are the reasons guys end up bald,sitting in a chair and staring into space.:laugh:

Honestly though it is about evenly split among ladies posting that think offering a seat simply for the fact it is a woman is the right or polite thing and those that find it to be silly.

How is a guy to know which is which in a given circumstance?

Just do it, if she doesn't like it tough sh#t, let it roll off your back like a duck in water. Works for me, I choose to be polite if she doesn't that's her choice. I refuse to be shamed for it.

StrengthIDidntKnow

Mine too.

When we are in a restaurant he makes sure he is sitting where he is facing the entrance just in case some idiot tries to come in and do something stupid. I love that he wants to protect us.

This too.

boomboom011

These are the reasons guys end up bald,sitting in a chair and staring into space.:laugh:

Honestly though it is about evenly split among ladies posting that think offering a seat simply for the fact it is a woman is the right or polite thing and those that find it to be silly.

How is a guy to know which is which in a given circumstance?

Just do it, if she doesn't like it tough sh#t, let it roll off your back like a duck in water. Works for me, I choose to be polite if she doesn't that's her choice. I refuse to be shamed for it.

Yes!!!!

dlw13

Men should give up their seats for women. Young people should give up their seats for the elderly. The able should give up their seats for the disabled. It saddens me that this is even a question.

I happily give up my seat to the elderly, disabled, and pregnant and people with children, but having received abuse for opening doors for women and letting a women have my seat and been told that I was a chauvinist, misogynistic pig for doing so my position has become that unless a woman clearly needs the seat I will sit on it, and if I get to the door first I will walk through it first and she can hold the door open herself unless she clearly can't. What goes around comes around

first.. dont blame one persons behavior on the entire sex.... and dont use one persons poor manners as an excuse for your behavior.
second.. theres an elegant modern solution to this.

I will hold the door for the person.
A polite person will thank me or gesture a thanks.
An average person will walk through it, but not say anything.
A total ***** will call me a pig. I can then do one of two things.

take the higher road and say how I hold the door for everyone, and shes being sexist for thinking its because shes female.
or take the lower road and call her a c*nt.
what road I take depends on the environment.

I'd call her a c*nt.

I have another option for you if you encounter a "total *****" Try "Oh, I'm sorry. I mistook you for a lady".

Cheers!

alias1001

The argument in this thread is really a genetic fallacy. Despite the fact that women are treated with certain customs today because they were thought of the "weaker sex" for centuries, most of the current Western consensus is that is not the case, and that we are equal. Any of the remaining "manners" are just that; it's being polite because our parents taught us it was the right thing to do.

In my opinion, whether to give up a seat, open a door, etc., for a woman is a personal choice. I don't care either way, but my boyfriend finds it important so I allow him. I've never expected it.


Regarding the topic, I always give it up to anyone who seems to need it (elderly, those with children, preggers, etc.)

Riding the bus is a challenge for me, though. When only the rail above is available to hold on to, I'm in trouble, Being a little over 5', I hate it when people won't move so I can grab something.

SwannySez

I spend close to 3 hours a day on public transportation M-F. I will offer my seat to a disabled person, a pregnant woman, an elderly person, someone with children, a person with special needs or if someone asks and offers me a compelling reason why they don't feel able to stand.

Will I offer my seat to any able bodied woman simply because she is female? No. Nor do I respect any woman who feels entitled to such treatment.

chrishgt4

Men should give up their seats for women. Young people should give up their seats for the elderly. The able should give up their seats for the disabled. It saddens me that this is even a question.

I happily give up my seat to the elderly, disabled, and pregnant and people with children, but having received abuse for opening doors for women and letting a women have my seat and been told that I was a chauvinist, misogynistic pig for doing so my position has become that unless a woman clearly needs the seat I will sit on it, and if I get to the door first I will walk through it first and she can hold the door open herself unless she clearly can't. What goes around comes around

first.. dont blame one persons behavior on the entire sex.... and dont use one persons poor manners as an excuse for your behavior.
second.. theres an elegant modern solution to this.

I will hold the door for the person.
A polite person will thank me or gesture a thanks.
An average person will walk through it, but not say anything.
A total ***** will call me a pig. I can then do one of two things.

take the higher road and say how I hold the door for everyone, and shes being sexist for thinking its because shes female.
or take the lower road and call her a c*nt.
what road I take depends on the environment.

I'd call her a c*nt.

I have another option for you if you encounter a "total *****" Try "Oh, I'm sorry. I mistook you for a lady".

Cheers!

we have a winner!

MrDude_1

I have another option for you if you encounter a "total *****" Try "Oh, I'm sorry. I mistook you for a lady".

that goes in with the first one... or the second one as well.. lol.

boomboom011

Men should give up their seats for women. Young people should give up their seats for the elderly. The able should give up their seats for the disabled. It saddens me that this is even a question.

I happily give up my seat to the elderly, disabled, and pregnant and people with children, but having received abuse for opening doors for women and letting a women have my seat and been told that I was a chauvinist, misogynistic pig for doing so my position has become that unless a woman clearly needs the seat I will sit on it, and if I get to the door first I will walk through it first and she can hold the door open herself unless she clearly can't. What goes around comes around

first.. dont blame one persons behavior on the entire sex.... and dont use one persons poor manners as an excuse for your behavior.
second.. theres an elegant modern solution to this.

I will hold the door for the person.
A polite person will thank me or gesture a thanks.
An average person will walk through it, but not say anything.
A total ***** will call me a pig. I can then do one of two things.

take the higher road and say how I hold the door for everyone, and shes being sexist for thinking its because shes female.
or take the lower road and call her a c*nt.
what road I take depends on the environment.

I'd call her a c*nt.

I have another option for you if you encounter a "total *****" Try "Oh, I'm sorry. I mistook you for a lady".

Cheers!

we have a winner!

where I come from we would smile and say "Bless Your Heart"