Public Transportation & Giving up your seat

rml_16

I'm not surprised by anything anymore. Last summer, we took our first family vacation to Disney. Each day we took the buses back and forth to the parks. I couldn't believe how rude people were - and these were primarily families. When the buses would fill up, my husband and I would sit our children on our laps (4 and 9). If someone with a small child/baby, pregnant woman, etc would get on and there was no seat, we would stand and let them sit, but I was disgusted how most people acted (it really was most, I know it was the middle of August, and blazing hot, people were tired, but seriously most people would not even look you in the face). On one trip, our 4 year old fell asleep as we were waiting for a bus back to the resort. My husband and I had to stand and take turns holding him, while other parents let their small children, teenagers, and even their bags have seats to themselves.

Interesting ... We go to Disney a couple times a year. I've seen people not give up seats, but I've never once seen someone use a seat for a bag when a bus or the monorail was full.

That's beyond rude.

LauraMacNCheese

I think this thread has turned hilarious. Now, we're complaining about men being gentlemen by giving up their seats and opening doors for women? Seriously women! What the heck is wrong with you?

I bet if a man was walking in front of you and let the door shut as opposed to holding it for you, people would be getting all pissy about that as well.

Personally, I love a door being held open for me, and a seat being offered to me. Shows there are still some gentlemen left in this world. And to those that still do this, thank you. It puts a smile on my face and sets me up for a great day.

You just reminded me of something...when I first moved to NV, I was going to a store and I held the door for the people behind me and they looked at me like I was from another planet, LOL! :laugh:

Nopedotjpeg

I just figure I'm young and healthy, active and in good shape so I don't need the chair as much as others do.

Then why do you need someone to give it up for you?

EmCarroll1990

I think this thread has turned hilarious. Now, we're complaining about men being gentlemen by giving up their seats and opening doors for women? Seriously women! What the heck is wrong with you?

I bet if a man was walking in front of you and let the door shut as opposed to holding it for you, people would be getting all pissy about that as well.

Personally, I love a door being held open for me, and a seat being offered to me. Shows there are still some gentlemen left in this world. And to those that still do this, thank you. It puts a smile on my face and sets me up for a great day.

You just reminded me of something...when I first moved to NV, I was going to a store and I held the door for the people behind me and they looked at me like I was from another planet, LOL! :laugh:

Weird how politeness and courtesy are so lost now a days.

KristysLosing

I remember waddling to the back of a bus and standing as it took off when I was heavily ( hugely) preggers. Then a man from the front stood up in the isle and yelled out....."come here and have my seat- and you should all be ashamed of yourselves!!"
So I waddled back down there red faced as the whole bus sat silently as they'd been told off!!

What an awesome guy!

k8blujay2

Personally, I don't expect people to give me a seat (at least not right now)... as I'm an able bodied woman... not that it matters anyway, as we don't even HAVE public transportation around here... but when I was in college... I lived on a busy route as well (well it was super busy at the beginning of the semester and then dwindled down as the semester went on) to the point were we were all like sardines in a can, people would have to jump off and then on again to let people off... Anyway, It's just a considerate thing to do to give up your seat for those that have a hard time standing on a moving bus or train... There is nothing wrong with being considerate.

As far as chivalry is concerned... I don't expect it, but I like it when it happens. If I ever have a son, I will be teaching him to be chivalrous... in my opinion, it's a sign of respect, not degradation.

MrDude_1

Men should give up their seats for women. Young people should give up their seats for the elderly. The able should give up their seats for the disabled. It saddens me that this is even a question.

I happily give up my seat to the elderly, disabled, and pregnant and people with children, but having received abuse for opening doors for women and letting a women have my seat and been told that I was a chauvinist, misogynistic pig for doing so my position has become that unless a woman clearly needs the seat I will sit on it, and if I get to the door first I will walk through it first and she can hold the door open herself unless she clearly can't. What goes around comes around

first.. dont blame one persons behavior on the entire sex.... and dont use one persons poor manners as an excuse for your behavior.
second.. theres an elegant modern solution to this.

I will hold the door for the person.
A polite person will thank me or gesture a thanks.
An average person will walk through it, but not say anything.
A total ***** will call me a pig. I can then do one of two things.

take the higher road and say how I hold the door for everyone, and shes being sexist for thinking its because shes female.
or take the lower road and call her a c*nt.
what road I take depends on the environment.

ItsCasey

Men should give up their seats for women. Young people should give up their seats for the elderly. The able should give up their seats for the disabled. It saddens me that this is even a question.

Why should men have to give up their seats for women? Are women inherently unable to stand for as long as men are?

I mean, I understand the cute idea of being chivalrous, but why can't a women show respect for a man by offering up her seat to him? Is that not a courteous gesture that any human being can offer another, without expectation? Why are men expected to act respectful like that, and women aren't? Or would a woman offering up her seat to a man just be too bossy, and no longer respectful, just because she has a vagina?

Ever notice how much hatred chauvinists have for women and how much hatred extreme feminists have for men? That's the path we're headed down, as a society, because people think chivalry is just a "cute idea." This is what happens when we fail to acknowledge and respect the fundamental truth that men and women are different.

EmCarroll1990

Men should give up their seats for women. Young people should give up their seats for the elderly. The able should give up their seats for the disabled. It saddens me that this is even a question.

I happily give up my seat to the elderly, disabled, and pregnant and people with children, but having received abuse for opening doors for women and letting a women have my seat and been told that I was a chauvinist, misogynistic pig for doing so my position has become that unless a woman clearly needs the seat I will sit on it, and if I get to the door first I will walk through it first and she can hold the door open herself unless she clearly can't. What goes around comes around

first.. dont blame one persons behavior on the entire sex.... and dont use one persons poor manners as an excuse for your behavior.
second.. theres an elegant modern solution to this.

I will hold the door for the person.
A polite person will thank me or gesture a thanks.
An average person will walk through it, but not say anything.
A total ***** will call me a pig. I can then do one of two things.

take the higher road and say how I hold the door for everyone, and shes being sexist for thinking its because shes female.
or take the lower road and call her a c*nt.
what road I take depends on the environment.

I'd call her a c*nt.

WhittRak

Men should give up their seats for women.

Sexist much?

It's not called "sexism" it's called being a gentleman. Get it right.

ncahill77

I always get so pissed when I see some young guy sitting there with ladies (young or old) and older men standing....get your lazy *kitten* up!

I also say ma'am, but if people don't like it that's ok because I am not acting polite for you, I do it for me.

KristysLosing

You offer your seat to a lady. Period.

I'd like to smack that kid. Some 19 year old futzing with his iPod and wants some old woman to stand while he sits comfortably. That's not a man. That's a little boy who could use some manners.

Bull****...

I ride the train everyday. And readily give up my seat to pregnant women, women with small children, anyone with a cane or obvious handicap... even a really old frail looking person. I am the first to offer up my seat. Or if someone asks, sometimes you dont feel well and really want a seat, people ask and I will stand.

But ANY lady? That is just plain craziness. She and I both worked all day, and I happened to be lucky enough to score a seat for 20 minutes. Such are the breaks we are all equal in the world! I actually think offering your seat to an able bodied woman other then some lame attempt to hit on her should be considered an insult to her. why does she need your seat, is her vagina too heavy to stand with?

Did you spend your day in heels, like women are "supposed" to in the business world?

I take the bus or train almost everyday, and its almost always elderly men that ever offer me their seat.

For what its worth, I always decline. I consider myself a huge feminist and it isn't an insult for a GENTLEMAN to treat you like a lady.

I only wear heels on the weekend... but I might have spent half the day climbing bridges or crawling through a tunnel. Sorry your shoes hurt, bring some sneaker for the commute

Sorry...I have to agree. We wear heels by choice. Regardless of who expects us to, it's a choice we make. And I also agree that, while it may be gentleman like, there is no need for a man to offer his seat to any woman who comes through the door. Now hold the door open, or the elevator door, that is always appreciated, but I do the same if I'm the first one there.

ejohndrow

It shouldn't have anything to do with sex. The able should give their seats up to the less able. I'm a female (obviously), but I'm in good shape. If I'm in a place where there are seats such as public transportation, or an airport etc., I will gladly give my seat up to someone who needs it more.

Heaven71

Poor thing...she shouldn't have to ask....she should have many guys offering their seat up anyway. Geez....I even offer my seat up to the elderly, kids and pregnant women.

^This


Kids don;t see much beyond the here and now and next weekend, they fail to empathise because no one ever taught them that it will be them one day anfd you should do unto others. My question to him would be...

How would you feel if it was obvious that you needed to sit and someone healthy and happy told you off for asking? Yeah, you'd be mad as all He((

MrDude_1

I'd call her a c*nt.

I think I'd get along with you. :laugh:

ski0721

People are terrible on the Boston public transportation system. It it very rare that I see anyone get off their a** for a person who could really use a seat. Sad indeed!

EmCarroll1990

I'd call her a c*nt.

I think I'd get along with you. :laugh:

Hahah!

beattie1

A long time ago, travelling home from work on the Tube in London, 8 and 1/2 months pregnant, knackered, I stood for some time, strap-hanging, staring at men hiding behind their papers while I wondered whether to ask someone to give me their seat. After a few minutes, someone DID offer me their seat - it was a middle-aged woman. I was SOOO grateful - and despised all those male loafers who had ignored me.

These days people, especially women, are more assertive & I hope anyone in the same position these days would feel able to tap the person sitting in the seat labelled "Please give up this seat if someone else needs it" on the knee and ask to sit down.

ncahill77

I'm not surprised by anything anymore. Last summer, we took our first family vacation to Disney. Each day we took the buses back and forth to the parks. I couldn't believe how rude people were - and these were primarily families. When the buses would fill up, my husband and I would sit our children on our laps (4 and 9). If someone with a small child/baby, pregnant woman, etc would get on and there was no seat, we would stand and let them sit, but I was disgusted how most people acted (it really was most, I know it was the middle of August, and blazing hot, people were tired, but seriously most people would not even look you in the face). On one trip, our 4 year old fell asleep as we were waiting for a bus back to the resort. My husband and I had to stand and take turns holding him, while other parents let their small children, teenagers, and even their bags have seats to themselves.

I have picked up peoples bags before and put them on the floor to open a seat, all while giving the say something *kitten* look to them. Inconsiderate pr#cks.

k8blujay2

I always get so pissed when I see some young guy sitting there with ladies (young or old) and older men standing....get your lazy *kitten* up!

I also say ma'am, but if people don't like it that's ok because I am not acting polite for you, I do it for me.

Being from Texas I am quite often called ma'am... I used to be offended at it when I was in my teens because I wasn't "old enough" to be a "ma'am" (by the way, I'm also a Military brat so Ma'am and Sir were expected titles in my household)... that is until my best friends brother explained that it is out of respect that they call me ma'am...