Kissing issue

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  • acrego
    acrego Posts: 84 Member
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    For me, I think kissing is extremely important, and GUYS, come on!!!! Seriously! You LOVED kissing when it was our 3rd date and you thought you might be getting to score! Kisses were on fire! What happened, now that "scoring" is no longer a challenge, you just wanna skip to the good part? That's not cool. My question to the guys is, if you don't like it in the context of a relationship, did you not like it on that 2nd or 3rd date? Was it seen as just a requirement to get past so you can get to the good stuff?
    I'm discovering that my boyfriend is not real affectionate either. Sometimes I sneak up behind him & squeeze him & kiss him on the neck, and he seems OK with that, (I asked and he said yeah) but he rarely initiates hugging & holding if it's non-sexual. But when things are heating up, there is definitely lots of kissing.
    So, question for the ladies: Do you enjoy making out if there is no sex in the immediate future? I guess I can sorta identify with not wanting to really make out & then not do anything else. ;)
  • rbjcksn
    rbjcksn Posts: 31 Member
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    If you love somebody/attracted it shouldn't matter where you are or what you are doing. Kiss em !!
  • Chari_Jan
    Chari_Jan Posts: 161 Member
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    For me, I think kissing is extremely important, and GUYS, come on!!!! Seriously! You LOVED kissing when it was our 3rd date and you thought you might be getting to score! Kisses were on fire! What happened, now that "scoring" is no longer a challenge, you just wanna skip to the good part? That's not cool. My question to the guys is, if you don't like it in the context of a relationship, did you not like it on that 2nd or 3rd date? Was it seen as just a requirement to get past so you can get to the good stuff?
    I'm discovering that my boyfriend is not real affectionate either. Sometimes I sneak up behind him & squeeze him & kiss him on the neck, and he seems OK with that, (I asked and he said yeah) but he rarely initiates hugging & holding if it's non-sexual. But when things are heating up, there is definitely lots of kissing.
    So, question for the ladies: Do you enjoy making out if there is no sex in the immediate future? I guess I can sorta identify with not wanting to really make out & then not do anything else. ;)

    No kissing even during foreplay for us. :sad:
  • KimHesse
    KimHesse Posts: 2 Member
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    wow!!! I really thought I was the only one with this problem. My husband is not a big kisser either and when we do it is just a peck!!! Drives my crazy!!! I dont know what to tell you or what to do myself!!!!
  • Chari_Jan
    Chari_Jan Posts: 161 Member
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    wow!!! I really thought I was the only one with this problem. My husband is not a big kisser either and when we do it is just a peck!!! Drives my crazy!!! I dont know what to tell you or what to do myself!!!!

    Nope...you're not alone. Sorry. haha
  • Cameron_1969
    Cameron_1969 Posts: 2,857 Member
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    I'm not a particularly affectionate person and I tend not to be amenable to public displays of affection. But this was the perfect spot to quote comedian Jim Jefferies on kissing:

    "Guys used to like kissing, then someone sucked our ****s. Why would I want to go to the playground when I've been to Disney World?!"

    Cheers.
    -wtk
  • Cameron_1969
    Cameron_1969 Posts: 2,857 Member
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    I'm not a particularly affectionate person and I tend not to be amenable to public displays of affection. But this was the perfect spot to quote comedian Jim Jefferies on kissing:

    "Guys used to like kissing, then someone sucked our ****s. Why would I want to go to the playground when I've been to Disney World?!"

    Cheers.
    -wtk

    Because the playground is free and Disney world cost's $100 bucks.
  • MamaKeeks
    MamaKeeks Posts: 234
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    Kissing is extemely personal and intimate. I think (and I'm sure many will disagree with me!) that it's actually more personal and intimate than sex is, because you can detach yourself from the act of sex much more easily than from an intense kiss.... well, I can at least! lol. I think it's more mental, less physical maybe? Either way, it's

    Yes, lack of intimate kissing can be an indication that there is something emotionally wrong in your relationship. If you don't want to share that intense personal experience with your lover, there could be something wrong.

    Or, it could be a germy thing. Mouths are gross! Bad breath, food stuck in teeth, slimy saliva... who knows what could be turning someone off?! Lol.

    Or a past experience related to kissing that has tarnished the experience and the intimacy involved...

    Could be so many reasons.

    I think it's important to talk about it, since it's obviously important to you. And it's clear you love him and think he's perfect for you, outside of this one thing. If this is all that is standing in the way of true happiness for you, talk about it, let him know, and see what the two of you can do to make it work for each other.

    Good luck - and many happy smooches to you!!! :smooched:
  • Banks01
    Banks01 Posts: 985 Member
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    Tic tac?


    It's weird, I loved kissing one particular ex but didn't like kissing my wife (now ex) and recently liked missing someone I was sorta dating.


    But overall, most girls I've kissed weren't good. Not to say that they weren't, but to say the experience wasn't.
  • auroranflash
    auroranflash Posts: 3,569 Member
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    We smooch all the time. Not just on the lips, little kisses on the hand and the cheek and forehead, etc, we are both very affectionate and cuddly :P
  • coe28
    coe28 Posts: 715 Member
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    It sounds like you have a pretty good relationship with this guy other than your kissing issue. So you have to ask yourself, is this something you want to lose the relationship over? Almost every relationship is going to have issues that one person doesn't like about the other. If you want the entire package and won't settle for a few issues that aren't 100% the way you'd prefer them, you're never going to be happy.

    You're absolutely right. Thank you for pointing that out. :flowerforyou:

    He is pretty amazing! :blushing:

    You're very welcome. I had a relationship end because I wasn't affectionate enough for him. After I tried over and over to make him understand how I'm just not an affectionate person and that I just wasn't comfortable with the constant touchy-feely stuff. He ended the relationship anyway, because it was a deal breaker for him. But if you're really crazy about this guy, don't let this get in the way and don't take it personally. More than likely it has nothing to do with his feelings for you, but with his own discomfort :wink:
  • AlsDonkBoxSquat
    AlsDonkBoxSquat Posts: 6,128 Member
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    Ok....my boyfriend is not big on kissing. He will if I ask but it always seems like a chore for him. We have talked about it a little and he says it's just not something he really likes and it's no big deal for him. I just don't get it!! How can you not like kissing??!!

    Does anyone else have a BF/GF or spouse that is this way? And if so, how do you deal with it.

    My DH isn't a kisser. There's no story to it, I love to kiss, he doesn't, whatever.
  • 76tech
    76tech Posts: 1,455 Member
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    No kissing wouldn't work for me at all. It's so important to me that my partner is a kisser too.
  • coe28
    coe28 Posts: 715 Member
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    I'm not a particularly affectionate person and I tend not to be amenable to public displays of affection. But this was the perfect spot to quote comedian Jim Jefferies on kissing:

    "Guys used to like kissing, then someone sucked our ****s. Why would I want to go to the playground when I've been to Disney World?!"

    Cheers.
    -wtk

    Because the playground is free and Disney world cost's $100 bucks.


    ^^^^^^BAHAHAHA!!!! YES!! I'm using this next time I'm asked for ..... well a trip to Disneyworld :laugh:
  • Dayna154
    Dayna154 Posts: 910 Member
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    i couldnt be with someone who doesnt like to kiss.
    Heavy kissing 99% of the time leads to other things.. For me anyway..
  • coylelaura
    coylelaura Posts: 8 Member
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    My EX-husband was not into kissing. It should have been a huge red flag. It was not the reason we got divorced, but I always missed it & I will never consider a relationship with someone who is not into kissing again. It's too important to me.
  • neverstray
    neverstray Posts: 3,845 Member
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    For me, I think kissing is extremely important, and GUYS, come on!!!! Seriously! You LOVED kissing when it was our 3rd date and you thought you might be getting to score! Kisses were on fire! What happened, now that "scoring" is no longer a challenge, you just wanna skip to the good part? That's not cool. My question to the guys is, if you don't like it in the context of a relationship, did you not like it on that 2nd or 3rd date? Was it seen as just a requirement to get past so you can get to the good stuff?
    I'm discovering that my boyfriend is not real affectionate either. Sometimes I sneak up behind him & squeeze him & kiss him on the neck, and he seems OK with that, (I asked and he said yeah) but he rarely initiates hugging & holding if it's non-sexual. But when things are heating up, there is definitely lots of kissing.
    So, question for the ladies: Do you enjoy making out if there is no sex in the immediate future? I guess I can sorta identify with not wanting to really make out & then not do anything else. ;)



    No kissing even during foreplay for us. :sad:

    Well, that could be an issue or indicator. Kissing during sex is hot.
  • Bikini27
    Bikini27 Posts: 1,298 Member
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    My EX-husband was not into kissing. It should have been a huge red flag. It was not the reason we got divorced, but I always missed it & I will never consider a relationship with someone who is not into kissing again. It's too important to me.

    Ditto. :flowerforyou:
  • Jellyphant
    Jellyphant Posts: 1,400 Member
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    I adore kissing as long as his breath doesn't stink.. that's a big no no.
  • WildFlower7
    WildFlower7 Posts: 714 Member
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    Women are aroused by the hormones in a partner's saliva and it acts like a drug to get everything else going. Seems to be an important step if you ask me :wink:

    AGREED ^^^ Ten fold!!:bigsmile:

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