Are Fit women the most hated group in America?

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  • wren176
    wren176 Posts: 148 Member
    Here is my two cents on this topic. As an overweight lady for the last 10 years I have JUST NOW realized something! My opinions of what looked healthy were not accurate at all anymore! Ladies that I THOUGHT looked wonderful would actually be considered overweight and ladies that I THOUGHT looked anorexic would actually be at a healthy weight! I think it was some sort of self protection denial mode! I have realized that as I have lost my weight my thoughts of what looks healthy have changed quite a bit! Everyone is entitled to our own opinions but we DON'T need to criticize each other:(
  • KarmaxKitty
    KarmaxKitty Posts: 901 Member
    Here is my two cents on this topic. As an overweight lady for the last 10 years I have JUST NOW realized something! My opinions of what looked healthy were not accurate at all anymore! Ladies that I THOUGHT looked wonderful would actually be considered overweight and ladies that I THOUGHT looked anorexic would actually be at a healthy weight! I think it was some sort of self protection denial mode! I have realized that as I have lost my weight my thoughts of what looks healthy have changed quite a bit! Everyone is entitled to our own opinions but we DON'T need to criticize each other:(

    I completely understand what you're saying...
  • jenlb99
    jenlb99 Posts: 213 Member
    A very good friend of mine that has lost 60+ lbs over the past year told me just the other day that the same women that use to be polite and stop their car and give her a friendly smile and wave to let her pass to get from the gym parking lot to the entrance last year now speed up to make sure she has to wait and look at her like she just killed their cat as they drive by.

    YES!!!

    I've been very large and am now roughly 20 lbs more than my goal weight (which is still higher than the BMI chart says I "should" be), and women were SO friendly to me when I was heavier.

    Even now, when I choose to go out without makeup, with my hair thrown back, etc. women are somewhat friendly to me. The second I put on a bit of makeup (I'm a minimalist), do my hair, and put on something other than workout gear, I get lousy service and nasty glares.

    Women are vicious and territorial...it's terrible, but it's true. We are, by far, our own worst enemies.
  • Pictures like this are disgusting. Why are we comparing these two women? Why??? This is what is so f-ed up about society. We are telling girls and women that their self-worth is dependent on how they compare to other women. This makes me so angry! My entire life I have been feeling as though I will only be successful and happy if I am better in some way than someone else. NO! My happiness should depend on my love for myself, not on how I rank among other women!

    Thanks to this messed-up way of thinking, I have developed an eating disorder than I am currently battling.

    Neither of these women are/were disgusting, and they each have their own strengths that make them uniquely beautiful!
  • caddygarcia123
    caddygarcia123 Posts: 122 Member
    Women are vicious and territorial...it's terrible, but it's true. We are, by far, our own worst enemies.
    [/quote]


    Heck yea ain't that the truth! Never had a man call me a short and fat but geez I've had girls call me things left and right and always directed it to my appearance too
  • JMarigold
    JMarigold Posts: 232 Member
    Everyone I know thinks that healthy is attractive. (Except this one girl)

    I guess I'm just lucky. (And slightly anti-social)
  • TK266
    TK266 Posts: 3,638 Member
    Are Fit women the most hated group in America?

    hmmm that a tough question ,,,, let me think .... al qaeda, pedophiles, gang members, serial killers, meth dealers, member of congress, gas company officials .... yep, fit women are the most hated, I can't think on anyone else :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • Elizabeth_C34
    Elizabeth_C34 Posts: 6,376 Member
    The irony is that most of us who are overweight are on MFP to get fit and thin ourselves.

    Women can be very cruel when it comes to each other. It's sad really. Men judge us far less than our female counterparts do.
  • i love me, and thats all that matters. beauty is in the eye of the beholder and to each his/her own. i know what i think is sexy and what my goal is. i used to feel the need to think one body type was sexy over another, but then i realized that i dont know these people. i dont know what drives their actions or fuels their self-esteem or the lack there of. so i do my best to not judge, all i know is that i love myself, i feel sexier each and every day, and when i reach my goal, i will be just as happy as i am with myself right now, the only difference is, i will be more comfortable in my "skinny" clothes. :flowerforyou:
  • taramaureen
    taramaureen Posts: 569 Member
    The irony is that most of us who are overweight are on MFP to get fit and thin ourselves.

    Women can be very cruel when it comes to each other. It's sad really. Men judge us far less than our female counterparts do.

    That's so true!
  • KarmaxKitty
    KarmaxKitty Posts: 901 Member
    The irony is that most of us who are overweight are on MFP to get fit and thin ourselves.

    Women can be very cruel when it comes to each other. It's sad really. Men judge us far less than our female counterparts do.

    That's so true!

    Extremely sad and true...
  • funkycamper
    funkycamper Posts: 998 Member
    Those are poor examples. The one on the left is heavier than current preferences, but by no means obese. The one on the right is thinner than current preferences, but does not look unhealthy. But I do agree with you in that people feel it is fine to insult women they find too thin. If you can't demean people who are overweight, the same rule should apply to those you consider underweight. To do any different is to be hypocritical.
    Yes. I agree that it is hypocritical.
    And what's with all the comparisons of what is better, anyway? Using these examples, to me, it's like comparing apples and oranges! Each are beautiful in their own way. I aspire to look like neither of them--I aspire to look like MY fittest. I wish more women would stop comparing ourselves to other women...there would be less bashing and more encouraging.

    Agree with both the above-statements.

    I am always amazed at the number of people on here who bash the bodies of women at various levels of fitness. Even in this thread there are those who are arguing about whether or not the thinner gal is fit. And they completely miss the point of the OP in the process.

    I remember awhile back a discussion where someone got in a snit over the word obese and went on a rant about it in another discussion saying how hurtful the word is (even though people were using it in the clinical sense) and then, a few days later, I saw this same person making fun of a fitness model's muscles. Hypocrite much?

    Although I really don't think it's a gender issue. There are male hypocrites, too.
  • JadeRabbit08
    JadeRabbit08 Posts: 551 Member
    A very good friend of mine that has lost 60+ lbs over the past year told me just the other day that the same women that use to be polite and stop their car and give her a friendly smile and wave to let her pass to get from the gym parking lot to the entrance last year now speed up to make sure she has to wait and look at her like she just killed their cat as they drive by.

    YES!!!

    I've been very large and am now roughly 20 lbs more than my goal weight (which is still higher than the BMI chart says I "should" be), and women were SO friendly to me when I was heavier.

    Even now, when I choose to go out without makeup, with my hair thrown back, etc. women are somewhat friendly to me. The second I put on a bit of makeup (I'm a minimalist), do my hair, and put on something other than workout gear, I get lousy service and nasty glares.

    Women are vicious and territorial...it's terrible, but it's true. We are, by far, our own worst enemies.


    Some women...please don't denegrate an entire gender with generalities.
  • mznisaelaine
    mznisaelaine Posts: 2,262 Member
    I think the real issue is people always bashing and talking about the women who ARE heavy/overweight/obese. I've been on both sides of the spectrum: at my smallest weight, I was super fit etc., and got talked about for being too "skinny" then when I gained 50 plus pounds, I got talked about and said I was too "big". So really maybe it's justthe fact that people talking about women (of all sizes) all the time which should be taking into consideration. It's hurtful either way when someone talks about a "skinny/fit" woman and when someone talks about a "big/overweight" women. Everyone is different, has grew up differently, learned differently things, has/hasn't been taught about the important of health, etc., so it doesn't make it right to talk about any woman of any size.
  • deniseearheart
    deniseearheart Posts: 919 Member
    to me Marilyn looks "fit" and other chick is skinny... Skinny in my eyes is anything that bones are showing and I personally think that is gross..... This is coming from me personally as a prior very thin person... I love being a little thicker ..
  • jaydubbayu
    jaydubbayu Posts: 456
    There's a difference between skinny and unhealthy! It's recognizable when you see it. Personally, I like a woman with meat on their bones.. The big thing is to be healthy!
  • Natx83
    Natx83 Posts: 1,298 Member
    The irony is that most of us who are overweight are on MFP to get fit and thin ourselves.

    Women can be very cruel when it comes to each other. It's sad really. Men judge us far less than our female counterparts do.

    That's so true!

    Extremely sad and true...

    Very true, I cant recall ever talking about another mans body with other males, saying... "oh that dude has got more muffin than a bakery". It just doesnt happen. The mates I work out with, are all supportive, this rings true of both male and female on this site though. No one here is here to not be motivated and supported by others. Woman as a society, are a lot harder on each other than males are on other males aesthetically. Males can help with this though, but not glorifying either end of the scale and just promoting a healthy life style.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,990 Member
    Most hated group in America......................Congress.


    A.C.E. Certified Personal & Group FitnessTrainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • Elizabeth_C34
    Elizabeth_C34 Posts: 6,376 Member
    The irony is that most of us who are overweight are on MFP to get fit and thin ourselves.

    Women can be very cruel when it comes to each other. It's sad really. Men judge us far less than our female counterparts do.

    That's so true!

    Extremely sad and true...

    Very true, I cant recall ever talking about another mans body with other males, saying... "oh that dude has got more muffin than a bakery". It just doesnt happen. The mates I work out with, are all supportive, this rings true of both male and female on this site though. No one here is here to not be motivated and supported by others. Woman as a society, are a lot harder on each other than males are on other males aesthetically. Males can help with this though, but not glorifying either end of the scale and just promoting a healthy life style.

    While I agree with you, I was actually referring to the fact that men seem to appreciate more female body types than other women do. Men don't seem to be nearly as hard on women's bodies as other women are.
  • OpenHeaven
    OpenHeaven Posts: 275 Member
    Each any everyday on facebook I see things like the pics below asking others to pick which girl they find more attractive or healthy, happy etc. And each and every time everyone picks the heavier women and some ( always women) even go as far as calling the fit women, malnurished, sickly looking, even anorexic.
    I also see on a pretty regular basis women post sayings like"" I would rather be fat and have a big heart than be skinny and shallow"" And again everyone clicks the like button or post comments about how great it is to be fat and make rude comments about "skinny" (their words) women.
    Then there are the fairy tales (cute made up stories etc.) for example: The fat women that walks into the gym and see's a huge sign on wall that says "" Do You Want To Be A Whale Or A Mermaid???"""" Then the fictitious women tells herself all the great reasons why it is so much better to be a whale and all the negative reasons why not to be a mermaid. And again, everyone clicks the like button or posts comments about how great it is to be a whale, aswell as the rude comments towards mermaids.
    So today after viewing the pic. below and reading the rude comments about the skinny girl in the pic. I posted that I am more attracted to the "fit" women by far just to see the response. And boy did I get a response!! Women saying how offended they were that I called the girl on the right "fit" My reply to them was """ well, it is what it is!! The girl on the right is fit!! I then asked ""so its ok for the numerous people that posted things like malnurished, stick fiqure, anorexic etc. to decscribe the girl on the right but when I call her "fit" which she is!! Everyone gets offended?? How comes no one was offended by calling the the girl on the right all those names? No one answered.

    zzzzzog.jpg


    Unfortunately, I think that people automatically jump to the conclusion that the fit woman MUST BE anorexic, bulimic, or making drastically unhealthy choices to get that body. While it is true that there are far too many women (and young girls) obsessed with weight, and are willing to destroy their bodies to obtain "perfection", there are also THOUSANDS of women in this world who either are genetically blessed with that body type, and therefore don't have to do much to maintain it, or women who have embraced a lifestyle of health and wellness. The latter being a group of women who eat right, exercise, and live an active lifestyle. There is NO REASON to hate on these women!!!!

    Since you did post a pic of the very controversial Marylyn, I'll throw this into the mix... A size 4/6 woman today would have been wearing a size 12 in the 50's!!!! Check it out on the internet! While many say that Marilyn was a 12, 14, or 16, she actually was most likely wearing a 6/8 (by today's standards). Clothing designers are simply NOT using the same sizing guidelines today (I'm not arguing that this is right or wrong)!! Say what you want about Marylyn, but you can't deny that she was fit. She may not have been 6' 120 lbs, or rail thin, but she was thin, and had a knock out body.

    I will agree that many of the women who chewed you out are jealous because they simply will not find the time to get FIT (it's not a swear word, it a glorious word), are lazy, or have given up. However, you have to remember that there are also a lot of women who have struggled with (or have loved ones who have struggled with) anorexia, bulimia, and other disorders who believe that images like the fit girl are perpetuating these horrible diseases. So many young girls have low self esteem because they watch TV, movies, go on the internet, and read magazines where they are continually faced with gorgeous women who are very fit, and they don't feel like they measure up. It's a very sad reality. It breaks my heart.
  • Ripken818836701
    Ripken818836701 Posts: 607 Member
    Most hated group in America......................Congress.


    A.C.E. Certified Personal & Group FitnessTrainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
    You know how much It would pain me to agree with you, but change congress to politicians and I would be forced too.
  • i_love_vinegar
    i_love_vinegar Posts: 2,092 Member
    I think it is just the people you are surrounding yourself with...
  • Robbie32
    Robbie32 Posts: 65 Member
    Both of these women are beautiful. Marylin of course is a bit softer while the other is more sporty. She does have nice thigh muscles, the way she is turned probably makes a her look a little more guant, but she looks fine to me. Obviously looks do matter and people do judge and I think thats ok. If a fat person likes to eat and be big (even though it could shorten their life and hinder their lifestyle) thats up to them. If a fit person wants to obsess about every nook and cranny of their body being trimed and toned and deny and sacrifice for that then good too.

    I think I want to be skinny girl in the summer with that ittty bitty bikini and Marylin in the winter with a tight long red dress! Both are Yummy.
  • Ripken818836701
    Ripken818836701 Posts: 607 Member
    Each any everyday on facebook I see things like the pics below asking others to pick which girl they find more attractive or healthy, happy etc. And each and every time everyone picks the heavier women and some ( always women) even go as far as calling the fit women, malnurished, sickly looking, even anorexic.
    I also see on a pretty regular basis women post sayings like"" I would rather be fat and have a big heart than be skinny and shallow"" And again everyone clicks the like button or post comments about how great it is to be fat and make rude comments about "skinny" (their words) women.
    Then there are the fairy tales (cute made up stories etc.) for example: The fat women that walks into the gym and see's a huge sign on wall that says "" Do You Want To Be A Whale Or A Mermaid???"""" Then the fictitious women tells herself all the great reasons why it is so much better to be a whale and all the negative reasons why not to be a mermaid. And again, everyone clicks the like button or posts comments about how great it is to be a whale, aswell as the rude comments towards mermaids.
    So today after viewing the pic. below and reading the rude comments about the skinny girl in the pic. I posted that I am more attracted to the "fit" women by far just to see the response. And boy did I get a response!! Women saying how offended they were that I called the girl on the right "fit" My reply to them was """ well, it is what it is!! The girl on the right is fit!! I then asked ""so its ok for the numerous people that posted things like malnurished, stick fiqure, anorexic etc. to decscribe the girl on the right but when I call her "fit" which she is!! Everyone gets offended?? How comes no one was offended by calling the the girl on the right all those names? No one answered.

    zzzzzog.jpg


    Unfortunately, I think that people automatically jump to the conclusion that the fit woman MUST BE anorexic, bulimic, or making drastically unhealthy choices to get that body. While it is true that there are far too many women (and young girls) obsessed with weight, and are willing to destroy their bodies to obtain "perfection", there are also THOUSANDS of women in this world who either are genetically blessed with that body type, and therefore don't have to do much to maintain it, or women who have embraced a lifestyle of health and wellness. The latter being a group of women who eat right, exercise, and live an active lifestyle. There is NO REASON to hate on these women!!!!

    Since you did post a pic of the very controversial Marylyn, I'll throw this into the mix... A size 4/6 woman today would have been wearing a size 12 in the 50's!!!! Check it out on the internet! While many say that Marilyn was a 12, 14, or 16, she actually was most likely wearing a 6/8 (by today's standards). Clothing designers are simply NOT using the same sizing guidelines today (I'm not arguing that this is right or wrong)!! Say what you want about Marylyn, but you can't deny that she was fit. She may not have been 6' 120 lbs, or rail thin, but she was thin, and had a knock out body.

    I will agree that many of the women who chewed you out are jealous because they simply will not find the time to get FIT (it's not a swear word, it a glorious word), are lazy, or have given up. However, you have to remember that there are also a lot of women who have struggled with (or have loved ones who have struggled with) anorexia, bulimia, and other disorders who believe that images like the fit girl are perpetuating these horrible diseases. So many young girls have low self esteem because they watch TV, movies, go on the internet, and read magazines where they are continually faced with gorgeous women who are very fit, and they don't feel like they measure up. It's a very sad reality. It breaks my heart.
    Just for the record I did not choose the pics the person that posted them on FB. did, I also didnt mind getting chewed out, thats not the reason I posted it here. I posted it here to see if others have seen the same type of negative opinions, comments as I have and if it has become acceptable to bash thin women in public or on a public forum? The reason I had a problem with the comments, was because I have female friends and family members on FB. that are all different shapes and sizes and regardless if people were bashing the body type of the women on the left or the right, alot of my friends and family were going to be offended by the comments.
  • taramaureen
    taramaureen Posts: 569 Member


    I will agree that many of the women who chewed you out are jealous because they simply will not find the time to get FIT (it's not a swear word, it a glorious word), are lazy, or have given up. However, you have to remember that there are also a lot of women who have struggled with (or have loved ones who have struggled with) anorexia, bulimia, and other disorders who believe that images like the fit girl are perpetuating these horrible diseases. So many young girls have low self esteem because they watch TV, movies, go on the internet, and read magazines where they are continually faced with gorgeous women who are very fit, and they don't feel like they measure up. It's a very sad reality. It breaks my heart.

    I'm sorry but I have to disagree with you here. It's a stereotype that those who are not FIT are lazy, haven't given it the time, or have given up. Personally I have put well over a year into my body, eat OKish, and run... a lot (I just completed my fist half). I'm still fat, I'm not fit by any standard of the word. My goal in life is to break the stereotype that fat people are lazy LOLI also disagree that it's the media alone that push girls into this. A lot has to do with peer pressure and their home lives.
  • Ripken818836701
    Ripken818836701 Posts: 607 Member
    I think it is just the people you are surrounding yourself with...
    I can honestly say that none of these people are friends or family members of mine. Some are people I went to High School with etc. ( I went to a very large high school) and some are FB. friends of my FB. friends and I never met them and are not even FB. friends of mine. Incase you dont know, If a FB. friend ( which 99% of them are not friends outside of FB) post's something, you see not only the comments of your FB. friends but the comments of people who are not FB. friends aswell
  • blakejohn
    blakejohn Posts: 1,129 Member
    When you get what you want in your struggle for self
    And the world makes you king for a day,
    Just go to the mirror and look at yourself
    And see what that man has to say.

    For it isn't your father or mother or wife
    Whose judgment upon you must pass.
    The fellow whose verdict counts most in you life
    Is the one staring back from the glass.

    You may be like Jack Horner and chisel a plum
    And think you're a wonderful guy.
    But the man in the glass says you're only a bum
    If you can't look him straight in the eye.

    He's the fellow to please-never mind all the rest,
    For he's with you clear to the end.
    And you've passed your most dangerous, difficult test
    If the man in the glass is your friend.

    You may fool the whole world down the pathway of years
    And get pats on the back as you pass.
    But your final reward will be heartache and tears
    If you've cheated the man in the glass.
  • transfixedtoast
    transfixedtoast Posts: 89 Member
    It's jealousy, but I think it's more the jealousy of "I think you're trying to be nice to yourself and take care of yourself and I hate myself so I'm going to be angry at you to mask my envy for your self loving, body nurturing attitude"
    And people who don't understand eating disorders- it's probably best to not go into it. There are a lot of factors that contribute to eating disorders, some genetic, some external factors, traumatic events, home lives, low self esteme, control issues, media exposure and just even having an addictive personality.
    And with the whole picture issue, both of those women are beautiful, both of those women are real women. Women come in all sizes and shapes including curves and being naturally lean.
  • madamepsychosis
    madamepsychosis Posts: 472 Member
    Each any everyday on facebook I see things like the pics below asking others to pick which girl they find more attractive or healthy, happy etc. And each and every time everyone picks the heavier women and some ( always women) even go as far as calling the fit women, malnurished, sickly looking, even anorexic.
    I also see on a pretty regular basis women post sayings like"" I would rather be fat and have a big heart than be skinny and shallow"" And again everyone clicks the like button or post comments about how great it is to be fat and make rude comments about "skinny" (their words) women.
    Then there are the fairy tales (cute made up stories etc.) for example: The fat women that walks into the gym and see's a huge sign on wall that says "" Do You Want To Be A Whale Or A Mermaid???"""" Then the fictitious women tells herself all the great reasons why it is so much better to be a whale and all the negative reasons why not to be a mermaid. And again, everyone clicks the like button or posts comments about how great it is to be a whale, aswell as the rude comments towards mermaids.
    So today after viewing the pic. below and reading the rude comments about the skinny girl in the pic. I posted that I am more attracted to the "fit" women by far just to see the response. And boy did I get a response!! Women saying how offended they were that I called the girl on the right "fit" My reply to them was """ well, it is what it is!! The girl on the right is fit!! I then asked ""so its ok for the numerous people that posted things like malnurished, stick fiqure, anorexic etc. to decscribe the girl on the right but when I call her "fit" which she is!! Everyone gets offended?? How comes no one was offended by calling the the girl on the right all those names? No one answered.

    zzzzzog.jpg

    Since you did post a pic of the very controversial Marylyn, I'll throw this into the mix... A size 4/6 woman today would have been wearing a size 12 in the 50's!!!! Check it out on the internet! While many say that Marilyn was a 12, 14, or 16, she actually was most likely wearing a 6/8 (by today's standards). Clothing designers are simply NOT using the same sizing guidelines today (I'm not arguing that this is right or wrong)!! Say what you want about Marylyn, but you can't deny that she was fit. She may not have been 6' 120 lbs, or rail thin, but she was thin, and had a knock out body.

    THANK YOU! So many people don't realise this and it drives me nuts. I'm a UK size 8 (US size 4) and a while back, I bought a vintage top that was marked a size 14.It was slightly loose, but loose in the way a UK 10/12 might be looser on me. People who say 'Well, Marilyn was a size 16 in her prime!' neglect to mention that clothing sizes were completely different. In fact, Simon Doonan helped put on a display of Marilyn Monroe's old clothes and had this to say:

    "Right away, I discovered that Marilyn was shockingly and unimaginably slender. She was sort of like Kate Moss but fleshier on top. Didn’t see that coming, did you?

    When it came to finding mannequins to fit her dresses, I simply couldn’t. M.M.’s drag was too small for the average window dummy."

    Marilyn may have had boobs, but if her clothes were too small for the average modern mannequin, she really can't have been that big. Why does it matter so much to people though? Big, small, muscular, soft. It can ALL be gorgeous, in my opinion. Why pit one body type against the other and decide one is more attractive? Bashing someone for being thin is just as bad as bashing them for being heavier and vice versa.
  • logicandlove
    logicandlove Posts: 191 Member


    I will agree that many of the women who chewed you out are jealous because they simply will not find the time to get FIT (it's not a swear word, it a glorious word), are lazy, or have given up. However, you have to remember that there are also a lot of women who have struggled with (or have loved ones who have struggled with) anorexia, bulimia, and other disorders who believe that images like the fit girl are perpetuating these horrible diseases. So many young girls have low self esteem because they watch TV, movies, go on the internet, and read magazines where they are continually faced with gorgeous women who are very fit, and they don't feel like they measure up. It's a very sad reality. It breaks my heart.

    LOLI also disagree that it's the media alone that push girls into this. A lot has to do with peer pressure and their home lives.

    As someone who's struggled with eating disorder issues for the past 4 or 5 years, I think I can safely say that the media plays a huge part in pushing girls towards this kind of behavior in the first place, both in my case and in the cases of many other people I know who struggle with the same issues. Growing up in a world that bombards you with airbrushed, photoshopped, unattainable images of beauty, constantly sexualizing these gorgeous women and implying that their value is determined by how attractive they are, it eats away at you when you realize that you don't look like that, you never have, and dammit you want to be that way, and obviously the best way to get thinner is to stop eating food, because calories make you fat, so cutting them out will make you thin.

    And so it begins. I've been in recovery for almost 2 years now, and yet I still have days where I don't think I'll ever look like those girls and I'm tempted to slip back into old habits, because it's just so easy. So while there may be some people responding negatively to truly fit women, I can understand and sympathize with the backlash against the constant stream of images that trigger more and more girls and women to start destroying themselves every day.