TIME magazine and breast feeding a 4 year old

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Replies

  • hesn92
    hesn92 Posts: 5,966 Member
    It's a mother breastfeeding her child. That is certainly not "disturbing" or "disgusting." I find it sad that so many people have that reaction.
  • ThinUpGirl
    ThinUpGirl Posts: 397
    I breast feed my son for the first year, however once he was able to was able to walk and hold a cup I stopped. That was my personal decision and she is entitled to hers.

    I wouldn't say I find the cover "disturbing" because breast feeding is a beautiful natural thing that bonds you with your child. With that being said, I believe that it could have been more tastefully displayed that better showed the beautiful nurturing side to the story.

    I feel bad for the child who will be starting school this year who will most likely be teased and caused to feel shame for something their should be no shame in. As a mother, I would hate to be the reason my child had insecurity.

    I think that I woman has a right to breastfeed as long as the child wants it, but I would be more tactful and consider how the child may feel.
  • callmeBAM
    callmeBAM Posts: 445 Member
    All I know is, that woman is HOTTTTTTTTTTTT
  • BondBomb
    BondBomb Posts: 1,781 Member
    I understand the purpose of debate. Everyone wants to be heard.
    But as a mother, and I am guessing most mothers share the same opinion, I don't really care what anyone thinks about how long I breastfeed my child. You can love it or hate it. It really make absolutely NO difference what anyone else thinks.
  • SkettiGurl
    SkettiGurl Posts: 186 Member
    I don't like the way TIME portraited it. No one feeds their 3 yr old like that. My son is 4 in a few months and we still have loads of cuddle sessions and I could see feeding him still at night. I was ready to stop at 13 months, that's just me. I have friends who have tandem fed and the oldest was 4 1/2 when he naturally weaned. I don't see the issue with it. It is totally natural.
  • enyo123
    enyo123 Posts: 172 Member
    I would seriously love for everyone to take a look at the actual ingredients in formula. How can anyone even think about giving this to their children, its so disgusting. What really pisses me off even more is that there are women in this world that will never be able to breastfeed and its sad that people have become so judgmental. These women will never know the bond & the security that a woman feels while nursing their baby.

    Wow. I find it sad that you would bash women who don't choose to nurse for whatever reason. For some women, nursing can be a detriment to that bond. I'm one of those women. I could not nurse my son. The thought made me physically ill. (I have no problems with other people doing that, but me? No.) I pumped for a while until it started to impact my mental health and interfere with bonding with my baby.

    I tried with my daughter, who is now seven weeks old. I had the nurse help me get her latched. I quickly had to give her to the nurse. You know why? Because I vomited. It's not bonding and secure when one is vomiting on her child. And then there are those who physically can't.

    Cheers to you for contributing to the mommy wars! I formula feed, but I support the rights of others to breastfeed whenever and wherever. But thanks for judging me as not being mom enough.
  • scs143
    scs143 Posts: 2,190 Member
    TIME wanted attention and TIME got it. I am not judging how anyone raises their children. Breastfeed or don't. Attachment parent or don't. I am no expert. I am plugging along like most in being a parent and just trying to raise my kids the best way I know how.

    What offends me is that TIME chose to put this out there and didn't consider the fact that my 7 year old would be standing in the grocery line. He saw me nursing my twins because he was 5 at the time, but he was a little surprised that the kid looked close to his age and he was latched on.
  • scs143
    scs143 Posts: 2,190 Member
    There shouldn't be mommy wars. Not any one of us was born an expert in parenting. Just because you like your way better than you like my way- doesn't make you any more qualified or any more of an expert.

    It's ridiculous that moms do this to each other.
  • Arthemise1
    Arthemise1 Posts: 365 Member
    Ew. I could only breastfeed for a few weeks until my milk dried up. Did it give me a special bond when I did breastfeed? No more than my son and husband had together. You have a bond no matter what you're feeding your child. I breastfed for his health; the bond came naturally.
  • SkettiGurl
    SkettiGurl Posts: 186 Member
    Co sleeping can be quite dangerous.

    Yes, in some situations it can be. But so can letting them sleep in a crib.

    Co-sleeping is not advised to parents in england/ireland. As it does/can lead to child deaths. Cot is far far safer.

    I had my son in England and we were adviced not to co-sleep ONLY if one of us was a smoker because the toxins can be transfered through skin. Also not to co-sleep if you'd had any alcohol, other than that it was totally acceptable and safe. We co-slept with my son often, he was in our room till he was 5 months old and even now at 3 1/2 sleeps with us.
  • hesn92
    hesn92 Posts: 5,966 Member
    I don't understand what the debate is for. I get really annoyed at a lot of the replies in topics like these.

    "It's disgusting" and "once your child gets teeth/starts walking/starts talking (whatever) you need to stop breastfeeding!" "You're a horrible mother if you choose not to breastfeed" Ummm how about it's none of your business how long other mothers breastfeed their children? And why do you care?
  • LilRedRooster
    LilRedRooster Posts: 1,421 Member
    Why is it so weird for this culture to be accepting of a mother giving her child her own milk? What is wrong with a culture where it's more normal to give our children milk from another species than it is to give them milk designed and tailored for them specifically?

    My daughter is going to be two this September, and I'm quite proud to say that we're still breastfeeding. She gets all the good fats, antibodies, and other things that are specifically made for her, and I don't have to do anything special; it's ready-made, perfect temperature, and never spoils. She's healthy, and I'm allowed to continue my lazy streak of non-preparation. And it's all free. Free is awesome.

    That being said, the cover does present a bit of a controversial tone, and the article gives the impression that a lot of parents following the Dr. Sears style are crazy, overbearing, put-all-your-*kitten*-out-there-for-the-world-to-see-because-you-don't-give-a-crap kinda of parents. I applaud TIME for tackling the issue, and bringing it to awareness, but they didn't do it very well. It was all tinged with an underlying feeling of judgement and negativity.
  • suzikay12
    suzikay12 Posts: 150 Member
    Do I support breastfeeding: Yes
    Do I support bottlefeeding: Yes
    Do I support breastfeeding until toddler or older: Yes, whatever works for you and your child!
    Should you breastfeeding your child affect me in anyway: No, it's between you and your child (and maybe spouse and family)
    Should you bottlefeeding your child affect me in anyway: Same as above
    Do I think the Time picture is creepy: Yes

    I have encountered plenty of people though who are willing to tell you that if you are not doing it their way, then you are wrong. (This includes both breast and bottle moms, I'm not discriminating) This is the thing that gets under my skin the most. I have a son. Regardless of how he was fed from the time of birth, he is a normal (sometimes obnoxious) 13 year old. I am comfortable with the feeding decisions I made and don't need anyone's acceptance or approval about it. I also won't tell you what you should do with your child. What works for you and your child is a personal decision, so don't force the issue on me.

    Happy Mothers Day weekend to all the moms here!
  • 3BeersKen
    3BeersKen Posts: 9 Member
    There are plenty of ways to raise a child. Caring seems to be the key. Who knew?

    Love it!
  • pudadough
    pudadough Posts: 1,271 Member
    I guess I'm of the mind that it's less than natural to NOT wean a child before THEY decide.

    Animals do it. They'll be quite aggressive to get the message across to their young that it's time to stop.

    A 4 year old does not need the breast. They have teeth in order to chew solid foods. They don't need breastmilk at all. Breast milk is designed specifically for human consumption, so why not make the argument that a 40 year old man should still breastfeed from his mother? I'm 100% positive that it would be nutritionally beneficial to him. Breastmilk would likely be good for humans of any age. That is simply NOT the point.

    Do the natural thing...wean your child. Or deal with people giving you weird looks. We're as free to do that as you are to defend your choice.

    There's a strong argument that the whole naturalistic parenting movement sets women back from being fully active members of working society, too. How the hell are you going to advance a career if you attempt to do 4 years of breastfeeding and "elimination communication" and all of the attendant BS prescribed by attachment parenting? The short answer is that you're not, of course. You simply cannot do both to full effectiveness.
  • Bubbles_09
    Bubbles_09 Posts: 65 Member
    I don't get why there is so many responses like who cares if she's bf her kid at 3 its her life and it has nothing to do with us and how we live move on.
  • AlsDonkBoxSquat
    AlsDonkBoxSquat Posts: 6,128 Member

    As for part two, pumping does take time, but my god sons mother would pump and I dont remember it ever taking that long? Maybe it was the type of machine?

    I used a Medela Freestyle, and that's the Cadillac of personal use machines. It depends on a lot of things as for how long it will take. How established the supply would be is a big one. Breast milk works on a supply/demand system. If you need a bigger supply, you pump more (or nurse your child more) to get your body to start producing more. And, as previously mentioned up thread, it's not as efficient as nursing the child directly from the breast.

    I've had times during pumping where it was a struggle to get an ounce, but towards the end when I was weaning myself from pumping (and anyone who says "just quit cold turkey" doesn't necessarily realize that can hurt and possibly even cause an infection in the breast from engorgement) with my first, I got 17 ounces in an hour. That's a lot when one has a one month old who is only taking in about 20 ounces in a day.

    All pumping situations are not the same, simply because all boobs don't produce at the same rate. Some women who can breastfeed successfully can't get more than an ounce out of a hospital grade pump.

    I had long pumping sessions because I was prolific. I have two letdowns every session. I was so fortunate I was able to donate over 300 ounces to the regional milk bank. On top of that I could feed my child. we are each so different!
  • karen0214
    karen0214 Posts: 120 Member
    I personally found the cover pic to be disturbing-what are your thoughts?

    I am a mom of 6 kids and I breastfed all of them. I breastfed four of them for almost 3 yrs. The other two just happened to want to wean earlier around 12 mo. and 18 mo. I always felt like the child would "detach" when they were ready and that's what all of mine did.

    Now, about the picture. I find it disturbing because in my opinion, she is mixing sensuality in with the nurturing of breastfeeding and I just don't see that they go together. I find the picture rather vulgar and exploitive of both the mother and the child. I don't at all have a problem with the fact that she still breastfeeds her son at almost 4 yrs old. I just think that the feeding can and should be done privately and modestly, which this picture is not. I think it can turn women away from wanting to breastfeed their children by presenting this as a scenario of breastfeeding. Breastfeeding is a great time for cuddling and nurturing the child, as well as giving physical nutrition.
  • MyFeistyEvolution
    MyFeistyEvolution Posts: 1,014 Member
    I found the cover pic to be inappropriate and a bit tasteless. I thought it came off looking sensual and just plain creepy. I think this shock value picture will just make it harder for women who do BF and when they have to do so in public (even when in the bathrooms or covered up...they still get plenty of *kitten* from people).

    I personally don't care what a mother chooses to do regarding BF.
  • lorierin22
    lorierin22 Posts: 432 Member
    I don't judge anyone on how they parent their children. Being a mom is hard work...whether you choose to bottle or breast feed or a combination of both. Just because one is right for my family doesn't make something else wrong for any other. We all have different circumstances and opinions. As for the rude looks and comments...most Moms will tell you they don't care. The pressure to stop nursing my child was not what caused me to stop at 15 months. We were both ready to move on. And that is how most Moms handle things. You deal with what others say and you still do what you need to do to raise your child the way you see fit. I think that is what the title of the article means "are you mom enough?", not are you mom enought to breastfeed a toddler/older child...but are you mom enough to parent your child the way you see fit, regardless of what others say or do?!
  • opus649
    opus649 Posts: 633 Member
    Do not need any "statistical data" to back up my opinion.... it's plain and obvious to see.... ask any husband (one with a spine) about how much he enjoys co-sleeping/parenting... lol

    I have a spine and my child co-sleeps. He's five. I wouldn't change a thing.

    Now what?
  • mikeyboy
    mikeyboy Posts: 1,057 Member
    I'll add it to the list of "things that don't affect my life even a little."

    ^^^ this!
  • vancil01
    vancil01 Posts: 70 Member
    I think it's hilarious, reminds me of that movie Grown Ups, the lady is breast feeding the child, while he is standing up. Sandler asks Kevin James, how old the kid it, he says....ummm 48 months...hahahaha, so damn funny. But seriously, who gives a ****, live your own goddamn lives, if you don't like it, don't read the ****in magazine...
  • jennyb612
    jennyb612 Posts: 83
    I'm against Time Magazine for pitting mothers against each other. And doing it on Mother's Day.

    This! What a sad thing to question if you're mother enough and in some way make Breastfeeding or SUPER breast feeding the dividing line. Amazing Moms come in many, many forms and some even choose NOT to breast feed. Happy mothers Day to all of the MFP Moms - no matter what ages your children are!! :flowerforyou:
  • PixEm
    PixEm Posts: 190 Member
    I breast fed my son, but still believe 2 should be the absolute max! If it can talk, walk and has teeth it probably can handle drinking regular whole milk instead of breast milk.
  • george29223
    george29223 Posts: 556 Member
    think i can convince a women iam a 377 hungry baby?
  • kimchi84
    kimchi84 Posts: 56
    i was breastfeed up until i was 3-4 i dont see how thats disturbing or even disgusting, breast milk is the best milk you can give your kids. Why is it so disgusting for some to see a mother breastfeeding her kids but its not disgusting for people to consume milk from an animal. I dont get it, so cow milk is not gross and does a body good but human milk and breastfeeding is disgusting?
  • complicatedmoves
    complicatedmoves Posts: 84 Member
    I breastfed, and I found the pic to be disturbing as well. I think once your child is school age (pre-school age) ...it's time to wean.
  • 0AmyMarie0
    0AmyMarie0 Posts: 315
    I'm against Time Magazine for pitting mothers against each other. And doing it on Mother's Day.

    ^^^^This^^^^
  • opus649
    opus649 Posts: 633 Member
    You know what this thread proves? That people who oppose attachment parenting haven't a clue what it actually means. And yet, their ignorance doesn't prevent them from criticizing it anyway. To me, it's ridiculous to make an infant sleep in a crib. But I would never criticize a parent for making that decision because it's NONE OF MY BUSINESS.