TIME magazine and breast feeding a 4 year old

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Replies

  • Hoppymom
    Hoppymom Posts: 1,158 Member
    I nurse my 2.5 year old. No biggie.

    However, this cover is crap. A kid who looks much older standing on a chair sucking mom's boob. Mom has that smirk. Then it says "Are you Mom enough?".

    I think she looks like a fool and is making a mockery of those who practice extended breastfeeding. I think she is also going to inflame those we already deal with who shun it.That is NOT a typical sitting at home nursing shot, so it's going to just make people more uncomfortable. Way to go Mommy Blogger!
    Thank-you. That was perfect. I breast fed our four children, none longer than 9 months but that doesn't mean I wouldn't have loved to do it for a year or so. Curcumstances don't always allow for it. I am not going to comment on how long I think a child should breast feed, but I do worry when it becomes more for the mom than the child. Or if a child is refusing to give it up when mom is ready to. I have also met a woman who was continuing to breast feed because her husband thought it was important. She wanted to stop. I didn't read the article yet but it appears that the child pictured is not getting all of his nurishment from the breast. He is well nourished and sturdy looking. It would be a rare mother who can adequately supply enough nutrients to support the life of a three year old.
    I was uncomfortable with the cover because the the headline and the "in-your-face" attitude that I perceived. I agree with the statement that I quoted here that the photo WILL inflame those who think breastfeeding is nasty or sexual and should be done in a bathroom if you are in public. I asllo feel that breastfeeding moms can use a bit of discresion when feeding their children and cover themselves a little so that their breasts aren't on public display. A balance of public feeding and modesty for the sake of others would be nice.
    As to whether this is a topic for a health and fitness site. Breastfeeding is the healthiest food for infants period. It is also helpful for mothers trying to get back into shape. It helps shrink the uterus back to prepregnacy size more quickly and helps to burn calories. It is about health.
  • opus649
    opus649 Posts: 633 Member
    If I lived in a starving country, yes, I would breast feed my child as long as I could. Since I don't and my child is able to get his nutrition from the foods we are lucky enough to be able to purchase, no, I would never breast feed my kid over the age of 1.5, maybe less time.

    I'm certainly not judging that opinion because I think people should do whatever they feel is best. But I would like to point out that, although you can meet nutritional requirements through food, only breastfeeding offers benefits to the immune system. A human child does not fully develop their immune system until the age of 7. That is one of the reasons that the World Health Organization recommends a *minimum* of two years. There is more to breast milk than just nutritional content.
  • Micahroni84
    Micahroni84 Posts: 452 Member
    If I lived in a starving country, yes, I would breast feed my child as long as I could. Since I don't and my child is able to get his nutrition from the foods we are lucky enough to be able to purchase, no, I would never breast feed my kid over the age of 1.5, maybe less time.

    I'm certainly not judging that opinion because I think people should do whatever they feel is best. But I would like to point out that, although you can meet nutritional requirements through food, only breastfeeding offers benefits to the immune system. A human child does not fully develop their immune system until the age of 7. That is one of the reasons that the World Health Organization recommends a *minimum* of two years. There is more to breast milk than just nutritional content.

    I definitely agree that breastfeeding is great for children's immune systems but It's not the ONLY food for kids under two that benifits the immune system. My friend was able to breast feed her daughter until she was 1.5 or two,I can't remember and our kids were always sick at the same time seeing as we were always having play dates.
  • anakinlover
    anakinlover Posts: 109
    *rolls eyes* I breastfed both of my kids. One was 2 1/2 years old, the other 3 1/2 yrs old when they weaned. It is ridiculous to me that our society is in such a hurry to have its children grow up. Thanks to many advancements in health care, people living to be 90 and older is no longer rare. If my kids can't be babies for longer than 12 mos of their life, that is incredibly sad. 4 yrs old is hardly adolescent. Breasts are functional above anything else. If people would stop viewing them as t**s and sexualizing every part of the female anatomy, this wouldn't be such an issue. Who cares how long a mom nurses her babies, or if she never nurses at all?!? Being a responsible parent is what matters. *rant over*
  • tabinmaine
    tabinmaine Posts: 965 Member
    I find it ironic that the one of my four kids that was breastfed the least amount of time...( 4 months) , is the healthiest of them all. He will be 9 yrs old in August and he has been on antibiotics 2x his whole life, and once was for an infected toe, so not even an illness.

    My oldest daughter was nursed till she was about 10 months, and she was the sickest, so many ear infections she had to have tubes put in when she turned 18 months...

    The immunity benefits I am not so sure I believe comes from the milk, I think it's more about allergies and nutritional value. I was told that the colestrum is what holds the mothers immunities, not the milk, so after day 3 of nursing.... the baby has gotten all of the immunities it will get.
  • lorierin22
    lorierin22 Posts: 432 Member
    I find it ironic that the one of my four kids that was breastfed the least amount of time...( 4 months) , is the healthiest of them all. He will be 9 yrs old in August and he has been on antibiotics 2x his whole life, and once was for an infected toe, so not even an illness.

    My oldest daughter was nursed till she was about 10 months, and she was the sickest, so many ear infections she had to have tubes put in when she turned 18 months...

    The immunity benefits I am not so sure I believe comes from the milk, I think it's more about allergies and nutritional value. I was told that the colestrum is what holds the mothers immunities, not the milk, so after day 3 of nursing.... the baby has gotten all of the immunities it will get.

    While it's true that an infant gets a wealth of immune benefits from the colestrum, the milk holds immunity qualities also. But it is limited to the immune system of the mother. Like, if you, as a nursing mother get sick with say the flu...if you are nursing through this, you are passing along the anti-bodies that your body generated to fight the flu, therefore, hopefully protecting the nursing child from getting it. Also if you receive say a flu shot during the first 6 months of your child's life (when they are too young for the shot)--the immune properties will keep the nursing infant protected.

    I however, have a crappy immune system, so I'm not sure what I good I did passing this on to my children. And there is always heredity and individuality that play a role. Your oldest may have been destined to be sick more based on other factors (even if not breastfed at all).
  • jen88ve
    jen88ve Posts: 153
    I still breast feed my 16 year old.....why didnt anyone tell me that your supposed to stop!!!!!!!!!

    BAHAHAHA! Hey if they choose not to wean themselves off, don't push them too! :laugh:
  • TheDoctorDana
    TheDoctorDana Posts: 595 Member
    I am not going to question how other parents raise their children, but the cover of the magazine was ridiculous. I am not a mother yet, but stuff like that is the reason women who choose to breastfeed have to put up with so much crap from the rest of the world over what's appropriate and what isn't. That picture made my skin crawl.


    This ^ but I did breastfeed and I am a mother.
  • CalJur
    CalJur Posts: 627 Member
    I have nothing wrong with a woman breast feeding her child in public or otherwise. Breast milk is the best nutrition and food for a young baby. That said, when the child is old enough to climb a step stool and open your blouse and pull the breast out HE IS TOO DAMN OLD TO BE BREASTFEEDING!
  • considermac
    considermac Posts: 59
    I have nothing wrong with a woman breast feeding her child in public or otherwise. Breast milk is the best nutrition and food for a young baby. That said, when the child is old enough to climb a step stool and open your blouse and pull the breast out HE IS TOO DAMN OLD TO BE BREASTFEEDING!

    Well SAID!
  • Oishii
    Oishii Posts: 2,675 Member
    I think the real difficulty of this topic is that in humans, unlike other mammals (correct me if I'm wrong), breasts are a sexual characteristic. Other mammals don't have great, big breasts. They are like the bright plumage of a bird, 'designed' to attract attention. The 'sexualisation' of breasts, per se, is not the problem, because nature did that. The issue is with a difficulty in accepting the dual nature of breasts: sexual and nurturing.

    I can't see anything sexual in a picture of a breastfeeding child, because the function of the breast in that moment of time is nurturing. In cultures where breastfeeding is the norm that doesn't mean breasts have lost their other, sexual function, it just means people understand there are two functions, not one.

    Oh, and an issue with breastfeeding past one year old isn't an 'American' thing. Part of its roots come from the historical , cultural pressure to have lots of children. Breastfeeding, especially overnight, can act as a contraceptive, so when a woman was required to produce many off-spring, short breastfeeding durations became the norm. The wealthier the woman, the higher the pressure to produce heirs, thus the existence of wet-nurses. This is centuries old and across Europe and will certainly have had some influence on what is considered the 'norm'.
  • auroranflash
    auroranflash Posts: 3,569 Member
    If we're talking about it, TIME magazine accomplished its goal, which was obviously to spark controversy and sell issues. :)
  • evansproudmama
    evansproudmama Posts: 493 Member
    I breastfeed my son till he was one.. hes 3 1/2 now and personally can not imaging him asking for my boob at this age. He has full convos with me and understands so much. I have no problem with wanting to give your child the best start but for GOD sake pump your boob and give your milk to him in a glass! In my opinon this is an attachment by the mother and not the childs need for the milk or else she wouldnt be having him hanging off her boob on the cover of a nationzal magazine! This child is gonna have some issues down the road when he gets ahold of this magazine..
  • theladyy
    theladyy Posts: 176
    My almost-3 year old would throw a hissy fit if he didn't get a daily breastfeed. As long as he keeps asking, I won't refuse.

    Kudos to any mother not bowing to the unfair peer pressure to give up too early.


    *He's very tall for 3 lol

    Great...teach him early to just throw a fit until he gets what he wants...that's smart.
  • theladyy
    theladyy Posts: 176
    The kid is 3, not 4.

    thanks for the correction-even at 3 years old-its disgusting. Not breast feeding itself-just at that age and the cover was just disturbing.

    I agree.

    oh, but its less disgusting to give your kids milk from a cow teet? hmm. intersting. or a toddler mixed formula from some big company that has killed children in 3rd world countries for greed...yup, im talking Nestle.

    The kid isn't standing underneath the cow, latched on to the utters.
  • theladyy
    theladyy Posts: 176
    I know everyone has their own opinion. . . .But I just think its gross the way she is doing it. Maybe when they get that old . . just pump and poor it in a cup or something if you must. Personally I think its too old to be breast fed

    Have you ever pumped? I exclusively pumped for my 2 year old when he was a newborn. It was a nightmare. Quite simply, pumping sucks. It's time consuming and inconvenient. If I were still giving my toddler breast milk, there's no way that I'd pump. There's no telling what he'd get into during that time. :-P

    How is it any less time consuming or inconvenient to breastfeed?
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
    Never mind.
  • theladyy
    theladyy Posts: 176
    I personally found the cover pic to be disturbing-what are your thoughts?

    What's "disturbing" you - the fact that the mother is breastfeeding a 3 year old or that she had someone take a photo of her doing it or that its printed on the front cover of a magazine?

    The first one doesn't bother me at all, the other two I agree. How is that kid going to cope with the abuse he's going to get from his friends? I hope the mother got paid enough to make her feel a bit better about what she's putting him through.

    EXACTLY. To all of you that have BF that long, I'll bet you don't have pictures of it, and especially don't have them circulating around the world, WITH names attached. When that kid becomes a teen, it WILL be found, and he will be ridiculed until the day he dies.
  • theladyy
    theladyy Posts: 176
    Never mind.

    Too late, already saw it when I was replying to someone else.

    I wasn't telling anyone how to raise a kid, but I think we can all (well, maybe not all, since you certainly didn't agree) agree that just giving into a kids tantrums isn't healthy.
  • JenMarie8781
    JenMarie8781 Posts: 377 Member
    I'll be breastfeeding my son until he's 3 or 4.
    I'm 19 years old, and I made that decision the moment he was born - i want to give him the best, i produce plenty of milk, why shouldn't i? it's not disgusting, it's natural. sure, not everyone wants to, and that's completely their choice, but just remember that the international weaning age is between 4-7 years; it's only because breasts have become so sexualized that we find it 'weird'.

    The international weaning age is between 4-7 years old because of necessity, not option.

    Most of the world isn't priviledged to the abundance of food resource that the Western World has. In that, if you have a loaf of bread and a few vegetable to last a week, doesn't it make more sense to feed yourself and breastfeed your child from your body than to try and stretch your already stressed resources between two people and not provide either one of you with the calories or nutrition necessary for survival.

    I'm not knocking your decision, your parenting choice is your own. I am just saying that when I hear that reasoning from women who live in the Western World, I find it flawed and misguided.

    its like saying "the international marriage age is 15" or "the international drinking age is 12" or "only 1 out of 500 homes in the world have indoor plumbing so there is absolutely nothing wrong with pooping in the streets".

    Some things that "the world" is doing isn't necessarily what the Western World is doing and that needs to be accounted for when making that argument.

    I refuse to drink the koolaid just because somebody tells me that everyone else in the world is doing it. Do whats right for you and yours because it is what you want to do. Good luck with your decision, my bff tells me breastfeeding helps with post baby weight loss so maybe you will lose the baby weight and some, I would love to hear the results 4 years from now.

    *Like*
  • ashleymichaud
    ashleymichaud Posts: 119
    Quite honestly I think this whole "attachment parenting" thing is a crock of shi$$. !!

    Letting kids sleep in your bed ( co-sleeping) and nursing till they are in school is ridiculous ! Bunch of tree hugging, granola eating nonsense...

    If you don't teach your children how to be independent and confident and go to sleep without nursing or sleeping with their parents you are not doing them ANY favors !

    The reason divorce rate is so high now is because of crap like "co- sleeping" husbands and wives don't honor each other any more, it's all about the kids... you picked your spouse first, start acting like a spouse.

    Nothing makes me more annoyed than wives who once they have a baby they ignore their husband and their marraiges and everything revolves around the kids..

    Life is about balance, getting all of your needs met by breastfeeding your kids or sleeping with them till they are 5 is not the way.....

    I have 4 children, ages 8-21, all well adjusted kids who excel in school and college. They are love me very much, they were all breastfed till they had teeth and guess what..... I am still married, and they slept in their own beds and had bedtimes and routines and they were not the little hellions running around the stores or up all night in restaurants with adults having meals....

    UGH

    So co-sleeping for the first 16 months with my daughter makes me a tree hugging granola head who hate my husband. Okay, sure.

    Giggle... granola head (kidding)

    LOL:laugh:
  • theladyy
    theladyy Posts: 176
    We live in 21st century US, where we have plenty of food available to most citizens; there is no need to BF a kid past 1-1.5 years. If you want to give it breast milk, great, but just pump it, I know most of the story was about the actual breastfeeding part, but almost everyone commenting here that do agree with giving a child breast milk, do so for health reasons, not for "attachment parenting".
    Breastfeeding an infant in public is fine, but if you actually go out and feed a child in public, you're just looking for attention and debate.

    The reason you see toddlers and kids still breastfeeding in places like Africa is because they don't have the option of going to a grocery store and getting food, and sometimes not even growing/raising their own.

    Yeah, I get the whole "to each their own" and "what works for some doesn't work for others" and even though this doesn't affect me at all, that doesn't mean I'm not allowed to have an opinion about it or that just because my opinion differs from others, that I have to keep quiet. I agree with the OP that the COVER is certainly disturbing, but that's obviously what Time wanted...the reason I find it to be that is because of how many shots they had to take before the got the 'right' one...and at that point, the kids was either not eating anything but just had his mouth hooked on the breast, or thinking he was at an all-you-can-eat buffet. And the caption "Are you mom enough?", that just seems like they're saying if you DON'T feed that long, then any other way is the wrong way.

    And yes, we're mammals, but we're not animals. We don't mate to keep our species from dying out (we're not in any danger of that for quite some time), we have babies because we just 'want one' (save for 'accidents')

    All of this just fits with this modern mentality of just letting kids do whatever they want, whenever they want, and disguising it as being the 'natural' way.
  • Florawanda
    Florawanda Posts: 283 Member
    I was unable to breast feed my first two children for more than a few weeks, to my great regret, but managed to do it with my third and fourth, and breast fed both of them until they were nearly two... but only one feed a day, usually at the end of the day - it was a very special time for both of us, a time to be together in the midst of what was often a chaotic family life ... and of course they were having normal food for the rest of the day. It was the most natural thing in the world to do.

    It was my third child's birthday yesterday - he is 36 now, and one of the most stable,well adjusted adults I know, who has weathered some devastating problems in his personal life, to the admiration of many of his friends. Similarly our fourth child seems to also have an inner strength. This is not to say that our eldest two are less stable, and I have no scientific proof that the prolongation of the breast feeding was what made a difference, if there is any, but simply making an observation.

    But I do sympathise with the comments on the publicity that the child will have to endure for the rest of its life.
  • epic10793
    epic10793 Posts: 5 Member
    I'm against Time Magazine for pitting mothers against each other. And doing it on Mother's Day.

    Well said!!
  • 12by311
    12by311 Posts: 1,716 Member
    I know everyone has their own opinion. . . .But I just think its gross the way she is doing it. Maybe when they get that old . . just pump and poor it in a cup or something if you must. Personally I think its too old to be breast fed

    Have you ever pumped? I exclusively pumped for my 2 year old when he was a newborn. It was a nightmare. Quite simply, pumping sucks. It's time consuming and inconvenient. If I were still giving my toddler breast milk, there's no way that I'd pump. There's no telling what he'd get into during that time. :-P

    How is it any less time consuming or inconvenient to breastfeed?

    As a mother who has done both (breastfed and pumped), pumping simply sucks. But I did it anyway when I had to.

    Also, for any woman reading this on the fence about BFing, I will tell you the best thing about it, besides the amazing bond, is that pulling your boob out at 2:00 a.m. is so much easier than getting up and preparing a bottle.

    Back to the original topic, I agree with the others that I do not like how Time is putting mothers on one team or the other. I breastfed until I went back to work...and then I pumped, but wasn't strict enough with my pumping schedule and ending up losing my supply. I am more educated (and it's a trial and error thing) now so with my second child I WILL be breastfeeding for at least the first year. I do not care if another woman is BFing or giving formula though....as long as the baby is being properly fed and is growing is what matters!

    As far as extended breastfeeding...can I personally see myself doing it? Nah, not really. However, where I am from, breastfeeding used to be taboo and it's just recently that younger mother's are changing that view.

    I don't really care if another family chooses extended BFing. I am a teacher and see kids in MUCH worse home situations than that. So I do not think people are bad mother's for extended BFing or think it's anything relatively close to abuse.
  • Edithrenee
    Edithrenee Posts: 546 Member
    Why is it disgusting? That's stupid.
    hum because he was to big! And the way she posing it looks gross! I beleive in breast feeding but it comes a time to stop and i think that was time to stop. I feel they took a beautiful thing and made it gross..
  • sleepytexan
    sleepytexan Posts: 3,138 Member
    Why is it disgusting? That's stupid.
    hum because he was to big! And the way she posing it looks gross! I beleive in breast feeding but it comes a time to stop and i think that was time to stop. I feel they took a beautiful thing and made it gross..

    I agree. That is a sexualized pose. No one stands like that while breastfeeding, WTF! The woman has a defiant gaze, and the child is awkwardly standing on a chair and twisting sideways to look into the camera. Is that the way a mom lovingly nourishes and bonds with her child? No, that is the way TIME magazine, and this woman (who happens to be a model and is obviously exploiting her child for the sake of controversy), stir the pot of "Mompetition" for Mother's Day.

    Have a look at the journalist's take on the photos:

    http://www.foxnews.com/opinion/2012/05/11/time-magazine-cover-forget-breast-what-about-boy/?cmpid=cmty_fb_Time_magazine_cover_--_forget_the_breast,_what_about_the_boy?

    WTF, Time! Fail.
  • DAMNCHARLIE
    DAMNCHARLIE Posts: 569
    it's natural to breast feed your baby, I dont know why people do over dramatic things to get people fired up an talking. I also think by 4 years old a sippy cup should be provided.
  • Ely82010
    Ely82010 Posts: 1,998 Member
    Happy Mother's Day to all,

    Mothers are a lot like flowers. Each has her own unique beauty and each is designed to bloom magnificently where she is planted. And that's what this beautiful 3-minute movie is all about!

    Heart of a Mother celebrates Mother's Day, and the beauty of a mother's love, in an unforgettable way. You're going to love it, and since mother's day is coming up later this week - you'll want to share it with every mother you know!
    Happy Mother's Day to all,

    http://www.flickspire.com/m/LSTruth/HeartOfAMother?Id=46268
  • nutritionwhiz
    nutritionwhiz Posts: 221
    Pump it and put it in a cup...you wouldn't keep giving a 3-7 year old milk in a bottle

    because it would ruin their teeth. We shouldn't be deciding how long to breastfeed for based on the limitations on a bottle.

    At my job I see lots of 3-5 yr old still getting a bottle.