Survey time: Should a guy pay on a first date?

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  • LindaCWy
    LindaCWy Posts: 463 Member
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    I read this wrong, thought it said "should a guy pay you on a first date" I was going to say "ya, cause then you have a pimp to answer to"... carry on
  • MrsLehman24
    MrsLehman24 Posts: 204 Member
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    What a loser! I went on a date with a guy and he would not pay for my $3 salad. Even tho I gave his young son a $75 gift...wtf. No second date... oh, and his car broke down in the middle of no where and I sent a friend to save him. Only because he had a young son with him.... NEXT
  • Grimmerick
    Grimmerick Posts: 3,342 Member
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    I always go by the whoever asks for the date pays for the date. Especially on first dates I think this mentality is easier for everyone, no embarrassing talk about splitting the bill or who is paying. Now of course whoever isn't paying can offer to pay for some or their share, but I don't think it is fair Male or Female to ask someone out on a date and then expect them to pay all or their half. If you are going to do that then you should tell your date up front so they can have the chance to say no and that they don't wanna date a cheapskate lol
  • picassoadagio
    picassoadagio Posts: 407 Member
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    A man should pay on the first date unless you know him well or you don't plan on going on a second date with him.
  • bugnbeansmom
    bugnbeansmom Posts: 292 Member
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    The guy should pay but if you offer, it kind of sends the friend vibe so he probably thought he slipped into the dreraded frend zone! he could have halves though. That is the move of a vinegar bag.
  • crisanderson27
    crisanderson27 Posts: 5,343 Member
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    I know the comment wasn't towards me but that just irk me seeing such an ignorant post.

    Yep, ignorance is rampant on these forums.

    For example...my quote below.
    You damn right he should pay. He should pay every single time they go out...until they have established a relationship. At that point, it should be alternated regularly, but still not a necessity.

    I will NEVER let a woman pay on the first 3-4 dates. That's just wrong.

    ^ This is why women should try to pay for their share. To avoid the "Never let" types. It weeds them out.
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
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    So if you are poor I guess you can't date...

    Only if you are poor and dont know how to do anything but EAT for a date..........
  • victoria4321
    victoria4321 Posts: 1,719 Member
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    Of course the man should pay. if he cant afford/doesnt want to pay, then why is he asking me out in the first place? i dont want to date a woman, i want to date a MAN.


    The difference between men and women is in our chromosomes, not in some out-dated theory on who should pay (dating back to when most women didn't have money because they didn't work). Maybe he's asking you out because he thinks you're interesting or kind or open-minded or very attractive. Shame that all he's going to get is a cheap, self-centered and sexist young lady whose idea of a meaningful relationship is entertainment at someone else's expense. My comment may seem harsh to you, but if you were a man, my guess is you wouldn't hold that same opinion.

    So you honestly dont think men and women act differently socially and emotionally?
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
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    A man should pay on the first date unless you know him well or you don't plan on going on a second date with him.

    If i dont plan on seeing him again, theres no way in hell Im going to try to squeeze a meal out of him first. Thats just... well actually that is probably the definition of taking advantage
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
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    forget all this

    in the south we arm-wrestle for that sht
  • Ctripp86
    Ctripp86 Posts: 45
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    To those that say whoever asks should pay which I agree with... how many of you on here have asked a guy out for a "first date"?



    ....<crickets chirping>......
  • lala11975
    lala11975 Posts: 26
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    I would say Yes, the guy should pay. Especially if he asked you out, which he did. I would offer money, but he should say, no I got it (especially if he wanted a 2nd date). What a jerk! If he asks why you won't go out with him again, tell him "to be honest on our 1st date I politely Offered to pay some of the bill, but you weren't supposed to actually take it from me." I say move on to another guy!!
  • love22step
    love22step Posts: 1,103 Member
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    This is a bit off-topic, but that reminds me... if you live in a place where women get paid as much as men for doing the exact same job, please let me know the city. I need to move there! In publishing we get paid about 30% less than males, at least we do in my corner of the world.

    Otherwise, carry on with your topic.

    I found a job like that, but it took me to a number of places. The military paid that way, so I stayed over 24 years. As a woman in the military, I had to work harder than the men and be a little tougher in some ways to get ahead, but I've always enjoyed challenges and change, so it was good fit for me. When I initially enlisted, only 2 percent of the US Air Force was female. That number was up to around 14 percent when I retired in 1996. As a side bonus, I learned a lot about men.
  • victoria4321
    victoria4321 Posts: 1,719 Member
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    To those that say whoever asks should pay which I agree with... how many of you on here have asked a guy out for a "first date"?



    ....<crickets chirping>......

    Lol I never have. The most I'll do is drop hints. if the guy doesnt ask I assume he's either not interested or lacks self confidence, two things that I dont want.
  • love22step
    love22step Posts: 1,103 Member
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    To those that say whoever asks should pay which I agree with... how many of you on here have asked a guy out for a "first date"?



    ....<crickets chirping>......


    Lol I never have. The most I'll do is drop hints. if the guy doesnt ask I assume he's either not interested or lacks self confidence, two things that I dont want.

    ditto
  • Rhea30
    Rhea30 Posts: 625 Member
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    I would say Yes, the guy should pay. Especially if he asked you out, which he did. I would offer money, but he should say, no I got it (especially if he wanted a 2nd date). What a jerk! If he asks why you won't go out with him again, tell him "to be honest on our 1st date I politely Offered to pay some of the bill, but you weren't supposed to actually take it from me." I say move on to another guy!!

    So you offer but really have no true intention on offering and if he accepts your offer because he didn't understand that you were just lying about offering then he is a jerk? That sounds like a jerkish move to me.
  • crisanderson27
    crisanderson27 Posts: 5,343 Member
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    forget all this

    in the south we arm-wrestle for that sht

    South...New York??

    :bigsmile:
  • Tonnina
    Tonnina Posts: 979 Member
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    If he asked you out, then he pays, if you asked him, you pay... If he's a gentleman, he will refuse taking any money from you and always pay no matter who asked who out to dinner.
  • Tropicalgirl3
    Tropicalgirl3 Posts: 40 Member
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    If he asked you out...OF COURSE he should pay. Again I am the older generation but I believe whoever does the asking does the paying. Unless you are "just friends"....then split it!!
  • coachblt
    coachblt Posts: 1,090
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    Times certainly have changed since I've been out there. No wonder I'm still single and will be for a while. If this is such a heated topic...where posters start name calling...just for paying for dinner, I can't imagine what else is so damn difficult????

    Ignorant for paying for a date? Seriously?

    WOW!

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