Survey time: Should a guy pay on a first date?

ShannanLaNae

What s incredible is that this is even a question, if your a dude with short arms and deep pockets u can do starbucks you can go to the park and do a picnic lunch, Hell in the OP s case the guy spent 25 bucks that could have been a date at a pizzeria. It ain't what you got but what you do with it. The real problem is that too many women accept this ridiculous behavior from guys asking them out.

SO TRUE DAVE...

taunto

It's sexist to expect the man to pay just because he's a man. If it's the first date or the 30th, it doesn't matter. He's no more obligated to pay the whole bill than you are.

This is just ingrained sexism, and I'm actually kind of surprised that women still expect this behavior. Considering it was born from a time where women weren't allowed to carry their own money, I see no reason to perpetuate it. And the claims that "gentlemen pay for the meal" is just shaming men into acting in a way that perpetuates and encourages sexism (against BOTH genders).

How about stop being so entitled, and just split the bill. We're equal.

This whole thread is just a terrible disappointment.

How is it sexist if he asked her out on the date? Its not like you just go on a date to get a free lunch. He's expecting her to make time out of her day to spend it with him whom she doesn't even know that well. The least he can do is pick up the check. I'm sure if she was just hungry she can always go to the supermarket.

I guess some girls just don't get asked out often. It's kind of sad you think a date is just a meal.

Wow. Seriously...WOW!!

I am at a loss of words. Thank god the girls I ask out don't think they're doing me a favor by going out with me

I don't even know why I'm surprised by a statement like this

edit: I always pay and I will insist on paying atleast 2 twice with all sincerity after which I will agree to go dutch. But please, don't do me a favor by going out with me when I ask you out. I know you think you're a gods gift to all men (and probably in your mind to most women too) but save this mortal from any embarrassment and just reject me.

femmi1120

To those that say whoever asks should pay which I agree with... how many of you on here have asked a guy out for a "first date"?

Seeing as how I only go for super shy nerdy guys, I tend to always be the one asking out (:

ScatteredThoughts

How is it sexist if he asked her out on the date? Its not like you just go on a date to get a free lunch. He's expecting her to make time out of her day to spend it with him whom she doesn't even know that well. The least he can do is pick up the check. I'm sure if she was just hungry she can always go to the supermarket.

I guess some girls just don't get asked out often. It's kind of sad you think a date is just a meal.

And the guy knows her all that well? He is not taking time out of his day? Yes, a date is not just about a meal. It's hopefully about two people enjoying each other's company.

taunto

Simple rule: If the guy pays, you gotta put out. Sorry ladies, I don't make the rules. I merely enforce it

Cooriander

I prefer that the guy pays for the first date, especially if he invited me on a date - I am old-fashioned. I don't like the idea that who is paying for the first date should be dependent on income. That being said, I prefer to pay for my part when the date is not working out. Weird, huh?

victoria4321

It's sexist to expect the man to pay just because he's a man. If it's the first date or the 30th, it doesn't matter. He's no more obligated to pay the whole bill than you are.

This is just ingrained sexism, and I'm actually kind of surprised that women still expect this behavior. Considering it was born from a time where women weren't allowed to carry their own money, I see no reason to perpetuate it. And the claims that "gentlemen pay for the meal" is just shaming men into acting in a way that perpetuates and encourages sexism (against BOTH genders).

How about stop being so entitled, and just split the bill. We're equal.

This whole thread is just a terrible disappointment.

How is it sexist if he asked her out on the date? Its not like you just go on a date to get a free lunch. He's expecting her to make time out of her day to spend it with him whom she doesn't even know that well. The least he can do is pick up the check. I'm sure if she was just hungry she can always go to the supermarket.

I guess some girls just don't get asked out often. It's kind of sad you think a date is just a meal.

Wow. Seriously...WOW!!

I am at a loss of words. Thank god the girls I ask out don't think they're doing me a favor by going out with me

I don't even know why I'm surprised by a statement like this

edit: I always pay and I will insist on paying atleast 2 twice with all sincerity after which I will agree to go dutch. But please, don't do me a favor by going out with me when I ask you out. I know you think you're a gods gift to all men (and probably in your mind to most women too) but save this mortal from any embarrassment and just reject me.

I'm not sure why you're surprised either. When I go out on a dinner date I have to spend time getting ready, planning an outfit, doing my hair etc etc. If we're just going to the dive bar down the block then it doesn't really matter, but thats more of a hang out and not even a date.

I never said I think a date is doing the guy a favor but you can't possibly expect a girl to go all out for a stranger then be annoyed that she expects you to pay.

fatboypup

a guy should pay on every date until he's married then its her turn

hanahlai

Just wanting to know everyone's view on who should pay on a frist date. I know equal right and all that but if I guy does not pay for me on the first date I just assume he is a tight a*rse and he not getting a second date.

Sunday night, first date, dinner came to $75 I gave him $50 and he took it and did not offer any change, hmm nice!

Gack!!!
Yes, I am not old-fashioned in most ways, but I think the guy should pay for dates. Especially, if he is the one asking for it!

hesn92

I am not old fashioned at all. I don't think the guy should pay just because he's a man. I think whoever does the asking out should be the one to pay.

taunto

I'm not sure why you're surprised either. When I go out on a dinner date I have to spend time getting ready, planning an outfit, doing my hair etc etc. If we're just going to the dive bar down the block then it doesn't really matter, but thats more of a hang out and not even a date.

I never said I think a date is doing the guy a favor but you can't possibly expect a girl to go all out for a stranger then be annoyed that she expects you to pay.

As opposed to the guy who is coming to the date after riding a mule and working all day at a brick making factory. I like your idea of a date being the same as a transaction.

victoria4321

How is it sexist if he asked her out on the date? Its not like you just go on a date to get a free lunch. He's expecting her to make time out of her day to spend it with him whom she doesn't even know that well. The least he can do is pick up the check. I'm sure if she was just hungry she can always go to the supermarket.

I guess some girls just don't get asked out often. It's kind of sad you think a date is just a meal.

And the guy knows her all that well? He is not taking time out of his day? Yes, a date is not just about a meal. It's hopefully about two people enjoying each other's company.

Of course he doesn't know her well, but if he just wanted to be her new buddy he should ask her out to the park or to go shopping maybe.

Trail_Addict

How is it sexist if he asked her out on the date? Its not like you just go on a date to get a free lunch. He's expecting her to make time out of her day to spend it with him whom she doesn't even know that well. The least he can do is pick up the check. I'm sure if she was just hungry she can always go to the supermarket.

I guess some girls just don't get asked out often. It's kind of sad you think a date is just a meal.

And the guy knows her all that well? He is not taking time out of his day? Yes, a date is not just about a meal. It's hopefully about two people enjoying each other's company.

Exactly... what is SHE bringing to the table? You can't be "old fashioned" when it comes to getting a free meal, but a modern women when it comes to everything else. This dates back to when women stayed home, and had babies. Nowadays, women have jobs, and demand equal treatment. So, it's time to stop being hypocritical and step up and truly be "equal"..

That being said, if you and he are in agreement about having "traditional" values, then have at it. But to expect every guy to pay on a first date just says you like a free meal.

StuAblett

Of course the guy should pay! That's what a gentleman does.

Certainly!

taunto

How is it sexist if he asked her out on the date? Its not like you just go on a date to get a free lunch. He's expecting her to make time out of her day to spend it with him whom she doesn't even know that well. The least he can do is pick up the check. I'm sure if she was just hungry she can always go to the supermarket.

I guess some girls just don't get asked out often. It's kind of sad you think a date is just a meal.

And the guy knows her all that well? He is not taking time out of his day? Yes, a date is not just about a meal. It's hopefully about two people enjoying each other's company.

Of course he doesn't know her well, but if he just wanted to be her new buddy he should ask her out to the park or to go shopping maybe.

And you would want him to buy her all the stuff that she wants too. Once again, you're looking for a transaction and not a date (or are those 2 mutual nowadays?)

hesn92

To those that say whoever asks should pay which I agree with... how many of you on here have asked a guy out for a "first date"?

I have.

Kenzietea2

If he asked me out on a date I would expect him to pay. If I asked him, I would be prepared to pay but he would win points if he offered!

victoria4321

How is it sexist if he asked her out on the date? Its not like you just go on a date to get a free lunch. He's expecting her to make time out of her day to spend it with him whom she doesn't even know that well. The least he can do is pick up the check. I'm sure if she was just hungry she can always go to the supermarket.

I guess some girls just don't get asked out often. It's kind of sad you think a date is just a meal.

And the guy knows her all that well? He is not taking time out of his day? Yes, a date is not just about a meal. It's hopefully about two people enjoying each other's company.

Exactly... what is SHE bringing to the table? You can't be "old fashioned" when it comes to getting a free meal, but a modern women when it comes to everything else. This dates back to when women stayed home, and had babies. Nowadays, women have jobs, and demand equal treatment. So, it's time to stop being hypocritical and step up and truly be "equal"..

That being said, if you and he are in agreement about having "traditional" values, then have at it. But to expect every guy to pay on a first date just says you like a free meal.

No, it says don't ask me to do something with you that you can't afford.

Athijade

To those that say whoever asks should pay which I agree with... how many of you on here have asked a guy out for a "first date"?

I have and I had every intention of paying.

Then we battled over the bill.

victoria4321

How is it sexist if he asked her out on the date? Its not like you just go on a date to get a free lunch. He's expecting her to make time out of her day to spend it with him whom she doesn't even know that well. The least he can do is pick up the check. I'm sure if she was just hungry she can always go to the supermarket.

I guess some girls just don't get asked out often. It's kind of sad you think a date is just a meal.

And the guy knows her all that well? He is not taking time out of his day? Yes, a date is not just about a meal. It's hopefully about two people enjoying each other's company.

Of course he doesn't know her well, but if he just wanted to be her new buddy he should ask her out to the park or to go shopping maybe.

And you would want him to buy her all the stuff that she wants too. Once again, you're looking for a transaction and not a date (or are those 2 mutual nowadays?)

I never said anything about him paying for that. I go shopping with my girlfriends all the time and we pay for our own stuff. What I'm saying is if a man wants to act like one of my girlfriends then he can't possibly expect a date.