Being bashed on for being 23 and pregnant!! :(

rml_16

Sweetie, stuff happens and you just deal with it. Things like this are always scary in the beginning, but if you are strong and smart, they work out. I had my daughter when I was 17. I had a great support system (her father was and still is not part of that) and I finished high school, got a college degree and have a great job and a great life now. My daughter is graduating high school in a couple weeks, just got her license today and will be going to college in August.

Did I see all this when I was 17? Nope. It was scary and a long road ahead, but it worked out. It will for you, too.

swissjar

I was 21 and my wife was 24 when we had our son. I was still in school (senior) when he was born. Between the two of us we made less than 25,000 his first year. Grant it this was 21 years ago. I know this because he just celebrated his 21st bday and my wife and will be celebrating our 22nd anniv this year. Someone told me once that the hardest decisions in life always have the greatest rewards in the long run. Sounds like you have some tough decisions, but I see great rewards too!

purpleipod

I don't think 23 is too young. The 20s are a womans typical child bearing years. Under 20 is a little eeehhhh to me but yeah.

Ephena

I'd already had both my kids by the time I was your age. Unfortunately that meant college got put on hold but I don't regret a single second of my decision. My kids are my world and they give me so much strength to keep going. Now at 27 I've got a good job, a great support network of friends, two beautiful wonderful kids. I may not be rich in my bank account but there's enough in there to pay the bills and buy food, clothes and toys and I have the most important thing - love.

P.S. No, there is no man but their dad is as involved as he chooses to be and I'm in no hurry to settle again.

sarahrbraun

So I recently just found out that I am pregnant. I do not believe in abortion, and I am for sure willing to own up to my responsiblity. My boyfriend is very supportive as well, although the thing is.. I recently just left my job to go back to school, it is hard finding another job these days otherwise I would've saved money if I knew I'd get pregnant I know no matter what I will strive to be the best mom I can be, I may be very "young" to alot of people, but I would love to hear any stories from young mothers who are holding up strong with their child today, and who HAS MADE IT if there was a struggle along with being pregnant at a "young" age. My mother & family aren't speaking to me as of this day and think I am so stupid and crazy for having a child. Please.. I need the support....


I'm worried about being unemployed.. my bf is working, I am going to a ROP program for school which is about a 6-8 month program for medical assisting / billing & coding, I cannot afford going to another school right now.. I hope I can make it, I know it will be a struggle but I also know it'll be worth it.

I was 20 years old and had been dating my BF for about 3 months when I got pregnant with my oldest ( now 16). He wasn't sure he even wanted to be a daddy! I told him to make a choice--be a dad or be a child support check for 18 years. After thinking for a few days, he decided to be a daddy. 17 years later we have been married for 11 years, and we have a 12 year old and a 6 year old!

Katie3784

I had my daughter when I was 21. Her father was 25, and we had been together for 7 years at that point. Being a mom is hard, especially at such a young age. My boyfriend was working a job he hated, and we lived in a house owned by my mother and were only able to pay her for utilities. I stayed home full time until she was almost two when I started to go to school for med. assisiting. Things got really bad in our relationship, and we broke up when she was 2.5. Then I met another guy(my husband), and got pregnant at 25 with my son. It's been really hard, and at times I wonder if my husband and I will make it. Sometimes I think he resents me for "forcing" him into fatherhood and marriage. I was not successful at medical assisting. In fact, I highly discourage anyone from doing it. My husband works two jobs and is never home. We struggle majorly financially, and never take trips and rarely go out to eat. My son is in the midst of the terrible twos, and I never get to go out by myself. I wish I could work, but childcare alone would set us back at least $300 a week and I don't have the skills to get a job that would make working worth it. As hard and boring and stressful as my life is, I love my kids so much. I always say I can't understand how people don't want children. It's what we are meant to do. It sucks so much that your family is so unsupportive at a time when you need them the most. My parents have always been there for us, and have gone far above and beyond to make things better for my family. I love them so much. It will be a lot harder to establish yourself in a career after you have a child, but I admire you for making the choice you have. I am pro choice, but I totally understand why women want to keep their babies. Good luck!

michellekicks

Really this is just the beginning of people telling you how you should or shouldn't do things lol... once you have kids, everyone will have an opinion

Nancy_AZ60

MissLauren, 23 is not too young to have a child.. You are an adult now. Take it from a past 'VERY young" Mom.. I had one child at 18 and one at 20 then was a single parent at 22. Once the baby arrives everyone will lighten up on you., Surround yourseft with people who love you.

My advice, "KEEP GOING TO SCHOOL". you will never have an easier time when you are a parent than the first year.. You will need to take care of yourself and the baby forever.

I have a 33 Year old son who is married with 2 little ones, My Daughter has 2 boys (9 & 4) also, My Step-Daughter just had her first. Those who love you will accept you for who you are.

Make a 3 year plan and stick to it. You really can do it all.
Take Care, Nancy H.

zaithyr

I got married at 18 and had my first baby when I was 21 so I definitely don't think 23 is too young! I found out I was pregnant with my first right after I enrolled in college. Got two semesters in while i was pregnant. It can be done!

HollyAus

I AM 23 and have THREE kids! lol So no 23 is not too young to have kids. I got pregnant three months before I graduated high school and had our first son 3 weeks before I was 19. I had to learn to be a wife and mother in those 4 months after high school. We then had our little girl 21 months later and almost exactly 2 years after her had our baby boy. People thaught we were crazy having thems so quickly after, and maybe we were lol, but we BOTH were going to school and working part time. We had baught a house right before we were married, with a little help from my parents tho. But we both finished college in 4 years. I had all thre of mine while I was in classes. Our little girl was born in the middle of finals and baby boy was born a week before I was finished with student teaching and two weeks before graduation lol. Now my hubs is a middle school history teacher and coach and I stay at home with our three little ones.
My dad and brother both would have had an abortion if they could have choosen for me. But I didn't want to. I think they thaught we would just be poor and wouldn't finish college or "do" anything with or lives. Also I had a full ride scholorship to play softball and basketball (on the junior varsity team anyways) so he was really proud of that and wanted me to do it. But it was the best choice I have ever made. I don't really think it's our choice to make tho. Give the baby the choice to live.
It IS possible and you can give that baby a good life.
CONGRATULATIONS!!!!

ericarae33

First off, congratulations to you!! I know it wasn't a planned pregnancy, but you are obviously responsible enough to handle the situation, your 23, you have a job and from what you have said are in a stable supportive relationship. Everyone will come around, and you will do fine....there are ways, it will all work out!!!!!!!!!!!!

court211006

firstly, congratulations! Don't listen to all those people. My mum was 17 when she first had my brother, she wasn't working either and they had to live on my dad's wage. My mum is going to be 40 in September, she's still with my Dad and honestly she's the best mum ever. She's my best friend and I honestly thnk her being so young when she had us is a great contribution to that, she was able to grow with us and it made us stronger together.

Yes, it's been hard and but she's done college and now has her own successful business. You can do it, just never lose faith, you're an amazing woman and you're child will be lucky to have you!

chauncyrenayCHANGED

My best advice is to stay in school!

The fact that you are in vocational school right now is AMAZING. You'll be done before your baby arrives. What a blessing!

I work at a vocational school in admissions and it just tears my heart up every time a young girl finds out she is pregnant and leaves school!

There is no better way for you to secure a future for your child.

Stay in school, friend! Good luck to you.

sara_bear85

I was in the exact position as you. I got pregnant when I was 20 and a full time student, my bf was the bread winner. I ended up being a stay at home mom and we did just fine. My son will turn 6 in 2 weeks. Just focus on you and that baby, everything has a way of working out even though it seems impossible at the time.

bergsangel

My best advice is to stay in school!

The fact that you are in vocational school right now is AMAZING. You'll be done before your baby arrives. What a blessing!

I work at a vocational school in admissions and it just tears my heart up every time a young girl finds out she is pregnant and leaves school!

There is no better way for you to secure a future for your child.

Stay in school, friend! Good luck to you.

This^ def finish school, I would say it's a blessing to be in school and not working...the school will have far more benefits for your future! 23 is NOT too young. And P.S. If the boyfriend can handle the bills (don't shoot for the moon, a little apartment, food, and furnishings), you should TRY not to work for a bit after the baby is born! Very precious time!
I had my first at 19 (unplanned as well) and have raised her very successfully. She is 13 and amazing!

hopelessdieter2012

Keep your chin up hon....I personally do not think 23 is too young considering there are those that start families younger.

I'm 23 this coming November and I'm a mother to a 19 month old boy & am currently pregnant with my 2nd child (due in the new year). I too gave up work to go back to school, starting september

I'm going to school and raising both of my beautiful blessings whilst I get my degree. Who's to say you can not do both, as most programs will send you your work home whilst you recover from labour, you will find there a lot more out there help-wise then there was a few years ago . Obviously it is your choice what you decide to do of course but just letting you know there is that option

I have been with my partner for four years and we try to share our responsibilities equally as he works evenings and he will be helping during the day whilst i attend my classes.

All i am trying to say is people can be just too judgmental and do not take into considerations other feeling before opening their mouths. If you & your partner are happy with your brilliant news, then its not up to anyone else what you wish to do with your life.

Sending lots of prayers and wishing you good health throughout your pregnancy

lindacorbinbobcorbin

you are 23 not 16!!! you are plenty old enough ...your plans will just have to change a little. If your boyfriend is supportive you don't have a problem. You only have a wonderful Joyous future with that little angle that you can call your own.
don't worry about what people say. Accidents happen and you'll get through it. Do you know how many women want to have children and for some reason cannot get pregnut. consider it a wonderful blessing and go on with your life!


Grandma Linda

NotThePest

One of the best gifts I gave to my now 35 year old son, was to go back to school when he was in 4th grade. Because both of us were in school and studying togeather, doing homework, etc. He got to see how important and celebrated learing and education was for me.

He is now an engeneer in the aerospace industry and has worked for Boeing, on the 787 Dreamliner, the Space Shuttle Program and now for HondaJet on their new plane. Investing in yourself is investing in your child. So get out there have that baby and go to school togeather.

kathyd0829

Don't let other people distress you, especially now. I was 19 when I had my first child and he is a fully grown, well adjusted married man who has 2 Masters degrees and I could not be prouder of him. As for school, I am an RHIT, which is a Registered Health Information Technician and my speciality is medical billing and coding. If you stick with the program you will not have a problem finding work, especially with the introduction of ICD-10 coming so soon. Your baby is lucky to have such a great mom. Don't worry about your family either, they will come around once they see that baby. You will be just fine.

melisa35158

Hang in there! You are going to be fine. Your family will come around soon enough. Don't worry about being unemployed...you are going to school to better your career.