Can I have a male friend even if I have a boyfriend?
Options
So today I met a really cool and funny guy on the bus who I would love to be friends with, the problem is I think my boyfriend would go crazy if I asked him about it.
I'm recently new to this city and I don't know anyone besides me boyfriend, it can get quite lonely sometimes. I don't want to cause arguments in our relationship so would it be best for me to ignore the funny cool guy on the bus and not respond to his email to hang out?
I'm recently new to this city and I don't know anyone besides me boyfriend, it can get quite lonely sometimes. I don't want to cause arguments in our relationship so would it be best for me to ignore the funny cool guy on the bus and not respond to his email to hang out?
0
Replies
-
I honestly don't see a problem and your boyfriend shouldn't worry about it. I encourage my g/f to have male friends and I'm trusting she's not going to do anything, but in exchange she also needs to be aware I can hang out with female acquaintances too.0
-
You should take your boyfriend to meet him the first time you hang out so he can get to know him and see that everything is ok. Plus he should trust you and your judgement. Just don't keep anything a secret from him. Should be fine.0
-
If you have to ask, no. You're too immature.
Other ladies, yes. Yes you may.
EDIT: Forgot to add, if your BF has a problem with you having male friends, he is not allowed to have ANY friends, as he is too immature and controlling.0 -
I wouldn't. My husband wouldn't have a problem with me talking to another man, but as far as having a "friendship" with a man and going out with them, hanging out, etc he wouldn't like it, so I would do it. I think that's part of a good relationship is respecting each others feelings! Good luck!0
-
You should take your boyfriend to meet him the first time you hang out so he can get to know him and see that everything is ok. Plus he should trust you and your judgement. Just don't keep anything a secret from him. Should be fine.
This.
To be honest though...the person to ask isn't here on MFP. It's your boyfriend. Some guys are ok with it...some guys aren't. Our judgment isn't going to be right or wrong...it's just going to give you ammunition for the argument you get into if he disagrees with YOUR judgment.
For me, it's a case by case thing. More relationships are split up by 'friends' than anyone else. I've never dated someone that one 'friend' or another (hers, or mine), hasn't tried to get with. So as a guy, again...I judge it by the person. The fact that YOU want a friendship, doesn't mean the other guy is only wanting a friendship...and believe me, the slightest wedge they can work, they will.
So in the end, it's going to be up to you. You'll have to talk to him, and if he doesn't say yes...you'll have to either be ok with his decision...or choose the new friend over him if you're not. There's not a lot of other options, because if he's not into it...making him change his mind probably isn't going to happen...and it'll be the beginning of the end anyhow, for all the arguments you'll get in over it.
0 -
So today I met a really cool and funny guy on the bus who I would love to be friends with, the problem is I think my boyfriend would go crazy if I asked him about it.
I'm recently new to this city and I don't know anyone besides me boyfriend, it can get quite lonely sometimes. I don't want to cause arguments in our relationship so would it be best for me to ignore the funny cool guy on the bus and not respond to his email to hang out?
It all depends on if you are attracted to him. Thats what it really boils down to.0 -
depends.... but if you have to ask...then it seems unlikely.0
-
You should take your boyfriend to meet him the first time you hang out so he can get to know him and see that everything is ok. Plus he should trust you and your judgement. Just don't keep anything a secret from him. Should be fine.
This.
To be honest though...the person to ask isn't here on MFP. It's your boyfriend. Some guys are ok with it...some guys aren't. Our judgment isn't going to be right or wrong...it's just going to give you ammunition for the argument you get into if he disagrees with YOUR judgment.
For me, it's a case by case thing. More relationships are split up by 'friends' than anyone else. I've never dated someone that one 'friend' or another (hers, or mine), hasn't tried to get with. So as a guy, again...I judge it by the person. The fact that YOU want a friendship, doesn't mean the other guy is only wanting a friendship...and believe me, the slightest wedge they can work, they will.
So in the end, it's going to be up to you. You'll have to talk to him, and if he doesn't say yes...you'll have to either be ok with his decision...or choose the new friend over him if you're not. There's not a lot of other options, because if he's not into it...making him change his mind probably isn't going to happen...and it'll be the beginning of the end anyhow, for all the arguments you'll get in over it.
Cris you are always so full of wisdom. I always like your responses0 -
Depends on your boyfriend. If your really concerned about it that much then it's probably a bad idea. My bf doesn't care about me hanging with a guy. He encourages me to make friends whether they are male or female. And all of his friends are female basically and it doesn't bother me.
Or you could ask yourself, would it bother you if he made a female friend and started hanging out?0 -
make it a threesome0
-
No, you may not.0
-
If it's that big of a deal to your boyfriend, he shouldn't be your boyfriend.0
-
Whatever happens dont put yourself in a situation where you are alone with him...0
-
If you have to ask, no. You're too immature.
Other ladies, yes. Yes you may.
EDIT: Forgot to add, if your BF has a problem with you having male friends, he is not allowed to have ANY friends, as he is too immature and controlling.
QFT0 -
THAT'S THE SAME THING AS CHEATING!!! DID YOU ASK YOUR BF IF YOU CAN BE FRIENDS? OMG0
-
Most guys are only looking for one thing. If the funny guy is gay then it is ok... If he is straight, then eventually he will want more than to be your friend....0
-
Prob not the best idea. See if he has a girlfriend or sig other then do something together as couples.0
-
Umm, what do you mean "if I ask him"? You have to get your friends cleared by your boyfriend? WTF?
My previous girlfriend had it straight. One night we were out at a club and a female friend of mine asked me to dance with her. I looked at my GF to see how she would react. She looked at me and said "As long as you aren't ****ing her it's ok with me".
That's the way it is supposed to be.0 -
Prob not the best idea. See if he has a girlfriend or sig other then do something together as couples.
this, but my hubs knows that I have a lot of male friends, I've always been this way and he accepts me for who I am.0 -
You should take your boyfriend to meet him the first time you hang out so he can get to know him and see that everything is ok. Plus he should trust you and your judgement. Just don't keep anything a secret from him. Should be fine.
This.
To be honest though...the person to ask isn't here on MFP. It's your boyfriend. Some guys are ok with it...some guys aren't. Our judgment isn't going to be right or wrong...it's just going to give you ammunition for the argument you get into if he disagrees with YOUR judgment.
For me, it's a case by case thing. More relationships are split up by 'friends' than anyone else. I've never dated someone that one 'friend' or another (hers, or mine), hasn't tried to get with. So as a guy, again...I judge it by the person. The fact that YOU want a friendship, doesn't mean the other guy is only wanting a friendship...and believe me, the slightest wedge they can work, they will.
So in the end, it's going to be up to you. You'll have to talk to him, and if he doesn't say yes...you'll have to either be ok with his decision...or choose the new friend over him if you're not. There's not a lot of other options, because if he's not into it...making him change his mind probably isn't going to happen...and it'll be the beginning of the end anyhow, for all the arguments you'll get in over it.
Cris you are always so full of wisdom. I always like your responses0
Categories
- All Categories
- 1.4M Health, Wellness and Goals
- 392K Introduce Yourself
- 43.6K Getting Started
- 259.8K Health and Weight Loss
- 175.7K Food and Nutrition
- 47.4K Recipes
- 232.3K Fitness and Exercise
- 401 Sleep, Mindfulness and Overall Wellness
- 6.4K Goal: Maintaining Weight
- 8.5K Goal: Gaining Weight and Body Building
- 152.8K Motivation and Support
- 7.9K Challenges
- 1.3K Debate Club
- 96.3K Chit-Chat
- 2.5K Fun and Games
- 3.4K MyFitnessPal Information
- 23 News and Announcements
- 992 Feature Suggestions and Ideas
- 2.4K MyFitnessPal Tech Support Questions