"babe" "hun"

Yes2HealthyAriel

I call pretty much all my guy and girl friends hon and I dont see the problem with it. My boyfriend was bothered by it at first but then realized that my attention and love is with him and not other guys. It is just something I have always said to people that I am really close to. Personally I think you need to get over it. I feel you are totally overreacting.

shanolap

I HAVE A HUGE ISSUE WITH THIS!!!

I HATE being called babe or hun by anyone besides my husband. I would tell your husband to shut his pie-hole!

Helpful, I know!

xTwK

So much insecurity on this thread LOL.

It's a WORD, stop letting silly things get to you.

pj12string

Hey babe, don't repay evil with evil. Ok hun?

jessicae1aine

Sounds like insecurity to me.

I couldn't give a damn what my fiance calls other women - and I'm not disillusioned enough to think he doesn't look, either, because that's human nature. Flirting is harmless, and he's coming home with me every night so what do I care if he calls someone "babe"?

betteringmyselfeachday

if you are insecure with it, then it is not okay. It is that simple. Explain to him how you feel. Give him examples of you calling another man a pet name. He should respect you and your feelings enough to stop. Sometimes guys need an eye opener (no offense to you guys on here!!).

SCVSarah

I've worked as a bartender/server and never been called 'babe" or "hun" by my co-workers. The fact that he did it right in front of you means that he is not trying to hide anything, so that's good at least. Sometimes men don't realize they are doing something wrong or disrespectful until it's pointed out. I agree with what others said, you should talk to him about it and explain why it bothers you. I'm sure it's innocent, but it would bother me too.

Steelheart7

So much insecurity on this thread LOL.

It's a WORD, stop letting silly things get to you.

I don't think its insecurity .. to me its more about respect.

gingerveg

There are a few I'd be okay with Babe and Hon are not two of them!

ETA ^what she said it has zero to do with insecurities Babe and Hon are not a respectful ways to address a woman you are not intimate with. I wouldn't be mad because I thought he was going to go home with them. I'd be mad that he showed such disrespect to these women!

skinnywithin

see this is why marraiges dont work...too many people claim OWNERSHIP of their spouse and decide who they can speak to and how they speak to them ....seriously people...HE IS YOUR SPOUSE !!!!!!!! He is commotted to you and only you and if the fact that he calls someone hun then maybe there are trust issues or something else going on in the relationship ...Jealousy is very ugly and can ruin a relationship in a heartbeat . SO Please just enbrace the fact that YOU ARE HIS WIFE, that he comes home to you everynight and sleeps in YOUR bed not theirs............AGAIN PICK YOUR BATTLES HUN isnt assigned to just you its universal...we all say we all use it and most of the time it means nothing.

so take a breath and enjoy the fact that he chose YOU to spend the rest of his life with !

myfitnessnmhoy

Here is a novel f'n idea, why not use their names? I only use pet names for the girl I'm with and nicknames for family and friends. Besides my "don't dip your pen in company ink" rule, I would never call a female coworker "babe" or "hun".

Here is a novel idea, different people react differently and social mores vary amongst different groups.

I worked for a company that had really good rapport among coworkers, and we had nicknames for each other. I've worked for companies where we were all on a first-name basis. I've also worked for companies that insisted on last names only, and females were only to be referred to as "Ms (last name)." so you didn't imply marital status.

My wife has also worked for companies that use nicknames and terms of endearment to refer to co-workers. Not a problem for me. If she wants to call another male "hon", I don't see it as an attack on our marriage or assume she's having sex with him. She's accommodating the social situation at work, and fitting in. No big deal.

Unless she starts calling someone "person whom I am f_cking behind my stupid husband's back", I will assume it's innocent fun. But then again my wife and I talk through our issues and don't post passive-aggressive attacks on each other anonymously on Internet forums.

Tourney3p0

Sounds like insecurity to me.

That's it in a nutshell. A clearly meaningless gesture was directed to someone who likewise perceived it to be meaningless. And now we have this.

Or maybe it wasn't meaningless at all. Maybe he meant every word, and he meant for his wife to hear it. Either way, counseling should be involved.

JustJennie1

It really wouldn't bother me. He calls women "darling" in an affectionate way as in "How are you darling?" It really doesn't bother me in the least. It's just a word.

xTwK

So much insecurity on this thread LOL.

It's a WORD, stop letting silly things get to you.

I don't think its insecurity .. to me its more about respect.

If you're with a man who has been this way for a lifetime and you're expecting him to change who he is, don't you think that maybe you're being disrespectful and should've known what you were getting yourself into? Just a thought, take it or leave it.

I understand where you're coming from saying that it bothers you, because it would bother me to an extent as well. But I wouldn't let a silly word get to me, it's not something to waste energy on.

snoopytwins

If it bothers you, say so. But, honestly, a name like "hun" or "babe" wouldn't bother me. I call everybody sunshine or sweetheart.

I think there is more here than you've let on...to be that upset about it. Perhaps past issues or something. Since I don't know, I won't comment further on that. I don't think retaliating is the best solution...you let him lead you by his example that bothers you?

jaxbeck

Doesn't bother me whatsoever, I don't have trust issues though

xTwK

see this is why marraiges dont work...too many people claim OWNERSHIP of their spouse and decide who they can speak to and how they speak to them ....seriously people...HE IS YOUR SPOUSE !!!!!!!! He is commotted to you and only you and if the fact that he calls someone hun then maybe there are trust issues or something else going on in the relationship ...Jealousy is very ugly and can ruin a relationship in a heartbeat . SO Please just enbrace the fact that YOU ARE HIS WIFE, that he comes home to you everynight and sleeps in YOUR bed not theirs............AGAIN PICK YOUR BATTLES HUN isnt assigned to just you its universal...we all say we all use it and most of the time it means nothing.

so take a breath and enjoy the fact that he chose YOU to spend the rest of his life with !

I agree 1023443534523%!

jaxbeck

see this is why marraiges dont work...too many people claim OWNERSHIP of their spouse and decide who they can speak to and how they speak to them ....seriously people...HE IS YOUR SPOUSE !!!!!!!! He is commotted to you and only you and if the fact that he calls someone hun then maybe there are trust issues or something else going on in the relationship ...Jealousy is very ugly and can ruin a relationship in a heartbeat . SO Please just enbrace the fact that YOU ARE HIS WIFE, that he comes home to you everynight and sleeps in YOUR bed not theirs............AGAIN PICK YOUR BATTLES HUN isnt assigned to just you its universal...we all say we all use it and most of the time it means nothing.

so take a breath and enjoy the fact that he chose YOU to spend the rest of his life with !

OMG. Thank you! You do not OWN your partner :drinker:

odusgolp

If he's not putting his thing in their thing, I fail to see a problem.

xTwK

If he's not putting his thing in their thing, I fail to see a problem.

Cheers to that :drinker:

happythermia

I kind of call everyone 'dear,' but it does annoy me when a total random guy calls me sweetie or whatever. Hypocritical, I know lol!

But I would rather be called 'babe' any day over MA'AM!

beauty2323

My husband calls me BABE!!!!!!!!!! If I hear him calling someone else that then OFF WITH HIS HEAD!

Hun- I use that & he doesn't so I can't really comment with that. Now if starts using it... OFF WITH HIS HEAD!! lol :laugh:

onedayillbeamilf

I'm glad I'm single.

Maude_Lewbowski

I despise when people use the word 'hubby".

Why all the spite, waiting to go out and call everyone the same? Sounds like bigger issues are going on but that's just my HO.

Maude_Lewbowski

Doesn't bother me whatsoever, I don't have trust issues though

^totally agree with you.

xTwK

I despise when people use the word 'hubby".

Why all the spite, waiting to go out and call everyone the same? Sounds like bigger issues are going on but that's just my HO.

Agreed, there must be other issues in their relationship to cause such insecurity...

Nikki_42

Here's the challenge with that-- people that work in bars and restaurants almost always talk to each other that way, it seriously becomes second nature to be a combination of a huge combo of flirty and smart-*kitten*.

Not making excuses for him, but I completely understand his thinking you're overreacting because we (people in that industry) totally accept it as normal. The high stress yet weird fun environment creates that over-stepping boundary/bound, because we have to have it with customers too, even though we know we don't mean anything by it at all.

But he should recognize (if he's been in the F&B industry for a while) it's only normal to us, and to try to contain himself a bit when he's with you.

Nikki_42

If he's not putting his thing in their thing, I fail to see a problem.

Pretty much lol.

Tropical_Turtle

If he's not putting his thing in their thing, I fail to see a problem.

Yup!

lorac321

My husband used to call everyone babe or hun, even his ex wife. What bothered me was that he used the same names for me. I told him I want my own "name". He calls me "bug". I would say he has maybe used my real name 3 times in the last year.