Why be a side-chick???

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Curvimami
Curvimami Posts: 1,853 Member
in Chit-Chat
Just read a post that asked why people cheat... Okay most ppl suggested it was because of selfishness. But I have always wondered about the other person. The one that knows they are a side-piece. What are their motives? I cant imagine that they would want to be cheated on, so why be the other person in anothers situation?? Boggles my mind and I will never understand.. P.S.Side chicks/pieces responses welcome


* Specifically speaking of the chick or chico that knows. Not the one that is unaware she is even on "the side" (she doesnt count, her position is not intentionally malicious)
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Replies

  • Dave198lbs
    Dave198lbs Posts: 8,810 Member
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    we are all sluts
  • BrettPGH
    BrettPGH Posts: 4,720 Member
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    we are all sluts


    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

    Seriously just end the thread there. That was perfect.
  • _hi_hat3r_
    _hi_hat3r_ Posts: 423 Member
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    The majority of the time the "side chick" doesn't know shes the "side chick".
  • coliema
    coliema Posts: 7,646 Member
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    *grabs popcorn*
    :glasses:
  • BurtHuttz
    BurtHuttz Posts: 3,653 Member
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    Probably lots of reasons. Some of the things I think are reasonable . . . there's a self-esteem boost in knowing that someone, who someone else finds desirable, finds you desirable - or more desirable, since they're willing to injure an existing, significant relationship. I believe there's a perverse allure for some people to induce a sig-other to cheat.
  • BrownEyedDiva
    BrownEyedDiva Posts: 35
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    The majority of the time the "side chick" doesn't know shes the "side chick".

    THIS IS SO TRUE. SO MANY OF THOSE MEN LIE AND CHEAT AND THE SIDE CHICK DOES NOT KNOW SHE IS A SIDE CHICK BUT FOR THE ONES WHO KNOW THEIR MAN HAS A WOMAN AT HOME, THAT'S JUST PURE PATHETIC, SOME PPL ENJOY IT.
  • TheAncientMariner
    TheAncientMariner Posts: 444 Member
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    "He wine and dine, but me and you we wine and grind, and when I'm on the field keep it on the sidelines!" - Ghandi
  • tlamarch
    tlamarch Posts: 105
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    guys can be a side chic too
  • ItsCasey
    ItsCasey Posts: 4,022 Member
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    I think most women DO know when they are the "other woman." They either think they can change the guy's mind or they have so little self-respect that they're willing to play second fiddle just to have something. Or they're evil and they just don't care.
  • AshlyRamos
    AshlyRamos Posts: 76 Member
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    Once upon a time, I was a side chick. Mostly because the person was convenient and I didn't want the strings attached.

    Why not just find someone else to hook up with, rather than someone in a relationship?

    In this case.. Because we had a great platonic relationship before hand and I knew it wouldn't try to evolve into more (or so I thought). He caught feelings for me. I left the situation.

    I was much younger then.

    Today.. I'd never be a "side chick" again. It leaves a bad stigma for the next guy you're with. Luckily, I've since found someone and we have the most trusting relationship ever. Neither of us could be happier. He knows about my past and understands that it IS the past and people grow as individuals.

    I can't say it wasn't fun while it lasted. But, it's not something I'd ever do again. (Even if I were single)

    No hate comments... Just figured I'd give my two cents. :)
  • AshlyRamos
    AshlyRamos Posts: 76 Member
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    I think most women DO know when they are the "other woman." They either think they can change the guy's mind or they have so little self-respect that they're willing to play second fiddle just to have something. Or they're evil and they just don't care.


    Just out of curiousity.

    Who is more evil, the side chick (that knows she is) OR the person in the committed relationship doing the cheating?

    I'm not sure why someone should be expected to respect a relationship IF one of the people in the relationship obviously have no respect for it themselves.
  • _hi_hat3r_
    _hi_hat3r_ Posts: 423 Member
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    I think most women DO know when they are the "other woman." They either think they can change the guy's mind or they have so little self-respect that they're willing to play second fiddle just to have something. Or they're evil and they just don't care.


    Just out of curiousity.

    Who is more evil, the side chick (that knows she is) OR the person in the committed relationship doing the cheating?

    I'm not sure why someone should be expected to respect a relationship IF one of the people in the relationship obviously have no respect for it themselves.

    Agreed.
  • DavetheHYNIC
    DavetheHYNIC Posts: 318 Member
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    The majority of the time the "side chick" doesn't know shes the "side chick".

    THIS IS SO TRUE. SO MANY OF THOSE MEN LIE AND CHEAT AND THE SIDE CHICK DOES NOT KNOW SHE IS A SIDE CHICK BUT FOR THE ONES WHO KNOW THEIR MAN HAS A WOMAN AT HOME, THAT'S JUST PURE PATHETIC, SOME PPL ENJOY IT.

    You sound a little bittter. Like this happened to you.

    Side chicks get spoiled, trips, shopping all the fun while the main chick sits at home depressed, chasing the kids, worried where her man is posting on mfp.

    So that's why.
    #provocativedave
  • Curvimami
    Curvimami Posts: 1,853 Member
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    The majority of the time the "side chick" doesn't know shes the "side chick".

    I am specifically speaking of the ones that know, not the ones that don't (they dont count, there position is not malicious, as far as they know they're just dating a guy)
  • StarvingDiva
    StarvingDiva Posts: 1,107 Member
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    Good sex without the commitment or headache.
  • _hi_hat3r_
    _hi_hat3r_ Posts: 423 Member
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    The majority of the time the "side chick" doesn't know shes the "side chick".

    THIS IS SO TRUE. SO MANY OF THOSE MEN LIE AND CHEAT AND THE SIDE CHICK DOES NOT KNOW SHE IS A SIDE CHICK BUT FOR THE ONES WHO KNOW THEIR MAN HAS A WOMAN AT HOME, THAT'S JUST PURE PATHETIC, SOME PPL ENJOY IT.

    You sound a little bittter. Like this happened to you.

    Side chicks get spoiled, trips, shopping all the fun while the main chick sits at home depressed, chasing the kids, worried where her man is posting on mfp.

    So that's why.
    #provocativedave

    You sound a bit experienced....
  • Curvimami
    Curvimami Posts: 1,853 Member
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    Once upon a time, I was a side chick. Mostly because the person was convenient and I didn't want the strings attached.

    Why not just find someone else to hook up with, rather than someone in a relationship?

    In this case.. Because we had a great platonic relationship before hand and I knew it wouldn't try to evolve into more (or so I thought). He caught feelings for me. I left the situation.

    I was much younger then.

    Today.. I'd never be a "side chick" again. It leaves a bad stigma for the next guy you're with. Luckily, I've since found someone and we have the most trusting relationship ever. Neither of us could be happier. He knows about my past and understands that it IS the past and people grow as individuals.

    I can't say it wasn't fun while it lasted. But, it's not something I'd ever do again. (Even if I were single)

    No hate comments... Just figured I'd give my two cents. :)

    I do appreciate your response. Everyone has a past. And I believe in change and forgiveness. i was just curious. Thanx :-)
  • terri0527
    terri0527 Posts: 678 Member
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    It seems to me that they get some kind of perverse sense of self worth if they can actually get the dude to cheat on the girlfriend/wife. Not necessarily true all the time, some are just evil and don't care if they break up a perfectly good relationship, but then again how can it be all that "good" to begin with if he ends up cheating? :ohwell: No one truly knows the motivations behind the actions but the person doing them..IMHO
  • Curvimami
    Curvimami Posts: 1,853 Member
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    I think most women DO know when they are the "other woman." They either think they can change the guy's mind or they have so little self-respect that they're willing to play second fiddle just to have something. Or they're evil and they just don't care.


    Just out of curiousity.

    Who is more evil, the side chick (that knows she is) OR the person in the committed relationship doing the cheating?

    I'm not sure why someone should be expected to respect a relationship IF one of the people in the relationship obviously have no respect for it themselves.
    I say both are equally wrong. Obviously the person in the relationship has more to lose.. I also understand the concept of how if the person cheating doesnt respect the relationship why would the "side piece". Doesnt make it right. But I guess I get it.
  • galegetsthin
    galegetsthin Posts: 1,352 Member
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    For me, it was because I didn't have to deal with any of the BS of a "relationship". I could set up an appointment for sex, fill my rx and send him to his crib. I wanted him for one thing. I got that one thing without having to deal with any of the other things. If I wanted to go on a date with someone else, I could, If I wanted to chill with the girls at the club, I could. He couldn't really veto any of it, because he was taken and understood that he couldn't ask me to live a life of solitude while he had his other life. It was a great relationship where we cared deeply about each other. We both went into it with the understanding that it had to be what it was. I knew he wasn't gonna leave his wife for me. I didn't want him to. We did love each other, but with the understanding that he also loved her. And he loved her in a much different way, and I was ok with that, because it was not what I wanted. I was into stuff in the bedroom that she wasn't, and I didn't want to clean up after him and make him sandwiches. Maybe someone, someday. But not him and not then.

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