Why be a side-chick???

1234568»

Replies

  • futuremalestripper
    futuremalestripper Posts: 467 Member
    You do not HAVE to release every 2 days... i call bs

    Sure. With effort, it's possible to avoid it for 2 days, just as possible to not eat for 2 days but you'll still FEEL very hungry. But you'll get more and more uncomfortable and feel more compelled to do it.

    Wait a few more days, and a man will have a wet dream against his wishes.

    Relationships are more than just sex but if you want to be in a committed relationship then you need to realize that sex is a big part of it. If you and your S/O aren't happy then that is when people start to stray. Is it right? No absolutely not. That is why even if you are tired or busy you still have to make time for each other because it is important and usually once you start having it more you want it more.

    Agreed. Sex is an element of a relationship, but definitely not the biggest. When I'm 80, I rather a partner in crime to torment other people in the nursing home. Sex will be the last thing on my mind. That guy about the "2 days" bs is spewing a lot of self-validating crap. He's a good "BroScience" kinda guy.
  • Just_G
    Just_G Posts: 73 Member
    I've never had a side chick, never wanted one. I gave every gf 100% of my attention and now my wife 100% of me. When things get stagnant, we work through it, when thing get dull, we experiment. All relationships take work and people nowaways are just too lazy. Everyone has urges and hormones, so that no excuse. A cheater will always be a cheater. I'd rather be a real man then a player anyday.
  • MadeOfMagic
    MadeOfMagic Posts: 525 Member
    I think most women DO know when they are the "other woman." They either think they can change the guy's mind or they have so little self-respect that they're willing to play second fiddle just to have something. Or they're evil and they just don't care.


    Just out of curiousity.

    Who is more evil, the side chick (that knows she is) OR the person in the committed relationship doing the cheating?

    I'm not sure why someone should be expected to respect a relationship IF one of the people in the relationship obviously have no respect for it themselves.

    Both are evil equally almost, the cheater is worse because he is cheating and is hurting the person who loves them. The side chick/guy are as just as evil (only if the know of the cheater's partner) because they are disrespecting the person who isn't doing the cheating, they know that this "affair" could/will hurt someone and yet they go on not caring about anyone but themselves.

    Some of these men have families, and if I found out I was the "side-chick" I would immediatly tell the wife, I would trick the guy to meet me at hotel/home, and have his wife/gf there when he arrives withe divorce papers (if it's a wife).

    I hate women who initiate cheating or flirting when they know the guys is taken, it pissed me off. I f*** hate them, karma will get them good. Although I have a really trustful relationship and I know my bf wouldn't even attempt anything to jeoprdize the love we have, but if I saw some c*** flirting with my man (knowing that he is taken), first I would swat like a fly, and if she ever comes around again/tries to make a move I would beat the sh** out of her, just as she deserves.

    Sorry not trying to be mean but f*** you to anyone who is side chick/guy who cheats knowing that person has a significant other, there is NO EXCUSE for what you do, even if the person is unhappy with their partner, if they are so unhappy than should leave their SO before ever cheating, and if he/she doesn't leave than it's clear sign oh piece of crap that guy/woman is. Even if you're want a no-string-attached relationship there is plenty of SINGLE men out there who want exactly that.

    Have some respect for the other people involved, and for yourself...and prepare yourself for what Karma has in store for you...
  • aj_31
    aj_31 Posts: 994 Member
    You do not HAVE to release every 2 days... i call bs

    Sure. With effort, it's possible to avoid it for 2 days, just as possible to not eat for 2 days but you'll still FEEL very hungry. But you'll get more and more uncomfortable and feel more compelled to do it.

    Wait a few more days, and a man will have a wet dream against his wishes.

    Relationships are more than just sex but if you want to be in a committed relationship then you need to realize that sex is a big part of it. If you and your S/O aren't happy then that is when people start to stray. Is it right? No absolutely not. That is why even if you are tired or busy you still have to make time for each other because it is important and usually once you start having it more you want it more.

    Agreed. Sex is an element of a relationship, but definitely not the biggest. When I'm 80, I rather a partner in crime to torment other people in the nursing home. Sex will be the last thing on my mind. That guy about the "2 days" bs is spewing a lot of self-validating crap. He's a good "BroScience" kinda guy.

    Lol...I hope when I'm 80 we've had enough sex that we don't have to worry about him running off with lady down the hall at the nursing home. My husband's grandparents are in their 70's and I still see them so affectionate towards each other and I know she wears little cute outfits to bed. I don't know what they do behind closed doors but good for them that they still got it for each other.
  • LaSweetMini
    LaSweetMini Posts: 157 Member
    I've never had a side chick, never wanted one. I gave every gf 100% of my attention and now my wife 100% of me. When things get stagnant, we work through it, when thing get dull, we experiment. All relationships take work and people nowaways are just too lazy. Everyone has urges and hormones, so that no excuse. A cheater will always be a cheater. I'd rather be a real man then a player anyday.


    Now this is a real man! Cheating is easy! Try something hard like being faithful! Kudos to you! Tell these LAMES who use every excuse to cover up their wrong doings how its REALLY done! I hate hearing people with their sorry excuses! What is wrong is wrong! Your excuses just make you look like that much more of a loser!
  • LaSweetMini
    LaSweetMini Posts: 157 Member
    :ohwell:
  • MadeOfMagic
    MadeOfMagic Posts: 525 Member
    I've never had a side chick, never wanted one. I gave every gf 100% of my attention and now my wife 100% of me. When things get stagnant, we work through it, when thing get dull, we experiment. All relationships take work and people nowaways are just too lazy. Everyone has urges and hormones, so that no excuse. A cheater will always be a cheater. I'd rather be a real man then a player anyday.

    ^^this is what people do in a healthy relationship. If things get dull/boring, you mix them up, it's a "relationship" after all, you work together to make the best for the both of you. If you are even "thinking" about cheating, than clearly you don't love that person enough and you should leave them before you hurt them.
  • MadeOfMagic
    MadeOfMagic Posts: 525 Member
    If people want open relationships, go for it. I just think people shouldn't cheat without ther partners consent.
    I think the "sides" are equally responsible on an ethical level. If a married woman tried to get frisky with me, the first thing I would do is tell her husband so he knows the situation he is in. It's the honest thing to do, otherwise she'll screw around, get aids, and ruin his life. There's sort of an ethical obligation to not watching peoples lives get ruined, don't you think?

    If the spouse is so "awful" then breakup and get your sex on after.

    If you like the sex without relationships, find someone for NSA sex, go to a swingers club, or find someone in an open relationship.
    To sex someone whose spouse is unaware is reprehensible. I would never date someone that did it because it shows their character. If they sexed a guy in an open relationship, I'm not bothered. It's the partaking of dishonesty and disrespect that I find sad.

    If you had a brother and found out 2 of the kids he's been raising for 10 years aren't his and that his wife got pregnant banging other guys, how would you feel? If you were that guy, wouldn't you feel relief and thanks for anyone who burst that bubble instead of letting you live in stupidity?

    ^^^^Definitely this
  • MadeOfMagic
    MadeOfMagic Posts: 525 Member
    I think most women DO know when they are the "other woman." They either think they can change the guy's mind or they have so little self-respect that they're willing to play second fiddle just to have something. Or they're evil and they just don't care.


    Just out of curiousity.

    Who is more evil, the side chick (that knows she is) OR the person in the committed relationship doing the cheating?

    I'm not sure why someone should be expected to respect a relationship IF one of the people in the relationship obviously have no respect for it themselves.

    The person in the committed relationship is wrong. It is not the "side chick's" responsibility to make sure the person is faithful to their Significant Other... that is the person in the relationship's responsibility.

    Side chicks/guys do have a responsibility called basic human RESPECT. They are disrespecing and hurting someone's partner, it's downright EVIL. And if that woman has ANY CLASS, she would call and tell her husband, NO PERSON should ever be cheated on, people should break up before they even THINK about cheating. Both cheater and the side person are EVIL and they should rot in hell.
  • gingerveg
    gingerveg Posts: 748 Member
    I personally would not ever be the side chick because I know what it feels like to be cheated on, and would never want to make someone else feel like that!

    girl code.
    nuff said!
    Yes to this. Never been the side chick and never will be. I've known a few and all of them have problems with self esteem (I've never known a side chick or dude who didn't know either). But with that said, I wouldn't blame or get too mad at the side chick if my guy was cheating--he's the one in the "committed" relationship. Have some courage and break up before you move on to someone else. A man or women who cheats puts their partner in danger of possibly contracting a VD from #3 not good and really cowardly. Your forcing your partner to have sex with #3 without his/her consent---not cool. Just break up if you're not happy.
  • DieVixen
    DieVixen Posts: 790 Member
    I have met some down-right nasty, evil women who are abusive to their husbands and withhold intimacy like it's a toy.


    So THAT'S the validation that homewreckers tell themselves! I get it.

    No, wait.

    No I don't.

    You can't wreck a home that's already broken.
  • scs143
    scs143 Posts: 2,190 Member
    "Side chicks" are a particularly sad breed of woman. In my experience, they break down into two groups.

    There's the desparate ones who kind of fell into it and they probably honestly think that the man will leave his wife (most cases he won't) and they just let themselves get strung along...

    And then there are the sluts, who say they do it because they don't like strings and all they want is the sex and thrill, but the truth is in the end they're just as sad as the woman who's getting strung along.

    So pathetic. Women who search for "power" and self esteem by landing a man or taking him from someone else will never truly be happy.


    Must be nice to be perfect. Congrats.
  • brandon0523
    brandon0523 Posts: 516
    this has got to be one of the oldest and dumbest debates of all time.. Women will bash men and say they are the worst and men will say women are just the same.. no one will ever win as no matter what it is still going to happen.. if you dont like it.. good for you do your thing.. if you like doing this kinda thing.. good great have a ball..

    you think the other s/o sitting at home is not getting some attention somewhere.. lies.. it might not be sexual or physical.. but it is mental... facebook and other sites even like this one give that person t home a place to talk to other people and post their pictures and have the opposite sex tell them how nice they look or how sexy they are blah blah blah.. if you where truelly in such a committed and deep relationship that you needed no one other than your significant other then why are you here posting your pictures.. if you want advice get advice they dont need to see you to give advice..

    so like i said do your thing have a ball, do what makes you happy in life because in the end it is your life.. no one is better than anyone for the choices they make.. everyone loves attention!!!!!!!!!!!!

    bite me
  • hpoowalker
    hpoowalker Posts: 16 Member
    Speaking from experience, I have been a side chick. I can tell you my reasons for accepting it, convenience. For me, I was just getting out of a messy long 18 year marriage, and the thought of not having to be accountable to anyone, but have the companionship was very attractive.to me. It worked well for quite a while, both she and I knew about each other, an unspoken understanding I suppose. I am not proud of it to be honest, but I am also not ashamed of it either...
  • CouchSpud
    CouchSpud Posts: 557 Member
    It depends on the kind of relationship one is in. If both have comitted to be monogam, its very much different to a relationship lacking commitment for whatever reason. The way I see it, we are talking about two adults, who make decisions - and need to face the consequence of any decision made, good or bad. I for example don;t get pissed of with the side chick, I am pissed of with the cheat - the consequence, a broken relationship and me walking out
    However, a relationship needs two people to work on it and two people to fail it - let's be frank, if you are all happy slappy and all is sorted and your sexlife is beyond awesome, you will be far less tempted to go and find a bit on the side. No one ever said relationships are easy.
  • MadeOfMagic
    MadeOfMagic Posts: 525 Member
    In my opinion, I don't always put blame on a side-chick. I have on two occasions in my life been with someone who was involved in a relationship. Not saying that would ever happen again as my bf and I have a strong, honest and wonderful relationship. We both know that the other won't cheat and have no reason to.

    The reason I did it: if it's just sex to me, a man's business is not mine. I don't know what his relationship is like, I don't know how he is treated at home, I don't care what his reasons are for finding sex elsewhere. I have met some down-right nasty, evil women who are abusive to their husbands and withhold intimacy like it's a toy. I honestly DON'T feel sorry for those women when their husbands stray or find someone to fill their needs when the wife won't out of spite.

    Bottom line, in my opinion, is that an affair is an issue between a man and his wife. Not the other woman.

    *so you as a human being have no accountability whatsoever..?*
    whats your sweet boyfriends name .. I wonder if I can lure him away. ..... . .? shouldn't be a problem for you I could care less about your intention , how much time you have put into the relationship and JUST an FYI women dont turn into nasty B@$#hs overnight ... There is always a reason.. maybe signals that the cheating was around the corner.. you are one of those sad gullible girls who believes what these poor men tell you.. first work on your values, secondly learn how to tell a rat @$$ from a "man" ... and thirdly .. just wait Karma's a hell of a teacher.

    I would give you my boyfriend's name and number in a heartbeat and feel completely comfortable with you trying to lure him in. Because we have an honest, open relationship built on trust and we just work perfectly together!

    Call me a sad, guillible girl if you'd like but I have to go home and have amazing sex with my wonderful bf on my lunchbreak.

    Although I agree some women have it coming for them, because they stop having sex and become distant/mean with their husbands...but it does not mean they deserve it. If a husband/partner is that unhappy he should LEAVE NOT CHEAT, than he can go **** whomever they want. But as long as they are "married" or in "relationship" they made a promise to stay true to this person, they made promise not to f*** someone else, they are lying to their partner, NO ONE deserves that, and though some have it coming for them I still feel sorry for them because it did not have to end like that.

    And what if the person they cheat with has STD's??? and they pass it on to their parner later???? That is just F***ed upm, they have no consideration of how it can affect the other person.

    See it's women like you who go willingly and **** other people's partners because you don't feel "sorry" because the wife had it coming for her...just another pathetic excuse of a cheater. Whether someone had it coming for them, you are still hurting someone and their family, that is NOT right, no matter what excuse you make up to help you sleep at night. It's inconsiderate and evil. period.

    You may feel comfortable with your bf now...but it doens't mean at some point he may lose interest in you and cheat on you, it happens to many people who least expect it, and you have no control over it other than trying to be a good gf. People change all the time...no matter how much you think that person loves you.
  • _Wits_
    _Wits_ Posts: 1,286 Member
    I think most women DO know when they are the "other woman." They either think they can change the guy's mind or they have so little self-respect that they're willing to play second fiddle just to have something. Or they're evil and they just don't care.

    Some of this...some of "I didn't know" out there as well.

    Also, the side person is also probably being told how horrible the wife or husband is so of course they think they can make that person happier.. Nine times out of ten the married person does NOT leave their spouse. I've been on both sides...all sides suck and everyone should just stay in their rooms!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • Tropical_Turtle
    Tropical_Turtle Posts: 2,236 Member
    Good sex without the commitment or headache.

    This is why once upon a time I was a side chick and I was ok with it. Do not do it now.
  • mandaapais
    mandaapais Posts: 3 Member
    i also have been a "side chick" i was young and dumb! & cared about nothing but myself.
    i was made to believe he would "leave" her! haha boy was i wrong!
    9months later we both had his kids & he never stuck around for either of us!
  • still_crafty
    still_crafty Posts: 682 Member
    I've seen both sides of the side-chick - does she know or not.

    I had a couple side-chicks seek me out to tell me they were the side chick when they found out I existed. Wasn't that fun.

    I had at least one that could have cared less that my picture was on the nightstand as she f#cked my husband.
  • Babymomakell
    Babymomakell Posts: 257 Member
    I personally would not ever be the side chick because I know what it feels like to be cheated on, and would never want to make someone else feel like that!

    girl code.
    nuff said!

    Exactly!!
  • 10acity
    10acity Posts: 798 Member
    "Side chicks" are a particularly sad breed of woman. In my experience, they break down into two groups.

    There's the desparate ones who kind of fell into it and they probably honestly think that the man will leave his wife (most cases he won't) and they just let themselves get strung along...

    And then there are the sluts, who say they do it because they don't like strings and all they want is the sex and thrill, but the truth is in the end they're just as sad as the woman who's getting strung along.

    So pathetic. Women who search for "power" and self esteem by landing a man or taking him from someone else will never truly be happy.


    Must be nice to be perfect. Congrats.

    Don't we have a medal for her somewhere?
  • dare2love81
    dare2love81 Posts: 928 Member
    "Side chicks" are a particularly sad breed of woman. In my experience, they break down into two groups.

    There's the desparate ones who kind of fell into it and they probably honestly think that the man will leave his wife (most cases he won't) and they just let themselves get strung along...

    And then there are the sluts, who say they do it because they don't like strings and all they want is the sex and thrill, but the truth is in the end they're just as sad as the woman who's getting strung along.

    So pathetic. Women who search for "power" and self esteem by landing a man or taking him from someone else will never truly be happy.


    Must be nice to be perfect. Congrats.

    ^^This. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion, but nobody's perfect - everyone makes mistakes, and we can all rationalize something that's wrong as being okay when we want to. And a lot of the women who either knowingly or unknowingly end up as the side chick have no malicious intent in mind, or desire to hurt the wife/girlfriend, etc. Are they being selfish, sure, maybe...but until you've walked in their shoes, don't judge.

    And to the poster on page 9 (StazzyBoo) who couldn't seem to get her point across without dropping multiple swear words left and right, that's just unnecessary. I'm sure you have made some mistakes in your life too that you wouldn't feel too good about if someone was swearing about you in that way. And no offense, but you're only 23, you haven't even begun to gain life experince as an adult yet - you're just a baby still. And really, your anger should be directed at the men who cheat, not the side chicks. If the guy is a good guy, then no matter what temptation in front of him, he won't cheat. And guess what, if the guy is bound and determined to cheat, one girl saying no because he's with someone will just make him go on the next girl who's willing. And a lot of times it's more involved than just cheating to cheat. Feelings are involved. Ever been in love with more than one person? It sucks, and not everything is cut and dry about what's right and wrong when it comes to matters of the heart.
  • kymillion
    kymillion Posts: 791 Member
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p1kT4u_D5PA


    Look it up.. seriously.. lol.
  • foodfight247
    foodfight247 Posts: 767 Member
    I think most women DO know when they are the "other woman." They either think they can change the guy's mind or they have so little self-respect that they're willing to play second fiddle just to have something. Or they're evil and they just don't care.


    JQ - That is so very very true. Given my situation, my ex is STILL friends with the lazy *kitten* woman he cheated on me with. She's tried every trick in the book. My ex even speaks to her disrespectfully aswell, yet she still lives in this fantasy land of thinking she's with him because they spend the majority of the time together. Yes, some people would say I'm the pathetic one for not standing up - I have - they have never been a couple or she's never been a bit on the side, however he cheated on me twice with her.

    With her, she just doesn't care about others feelings or that he WAS with me. I know it takes two to play tango, but in all honesty, he really didn't or even doesn't give two ***** about her and in recent times has tried to loosen ties with her in the sense of completely staying out of her way. Anyways, we haven;t separated because of her - its other issues. But she really has not helped over the years. IN fact on one occasion shortly after my son was born, I was so close to calling on her doorstep and giving her absolute grief, but decided she wasn't worth it. Nevermind the fact that a 90lb me getting argumentative with a 250lb+ Other Woman probably wouldn't have gone in my favour. lol!. I can get even in other ways, not that that's me or how I work at all.
  • DieVixen
    DieVixen Posts: 790 Member
    Ive been with my guy for 6 yrs, and the WOMAN he cheated on me with for a yr off and on was his friends mom!!
    This was about 3 yrs ago so yea, I also knew around the time it started and finally stopped..
    And the B-I-T-C-H knew that we were together and how i felt
    bout him but o well she seduced him with money and drugs. HOW DID WE MAKE IT TO 6 YRS? HE FINALLY CONFESSED WHEN HE RALIZED HE LOVED ONLY ME, LEFT HER AND ALL HIS FRIENDS HE USE TO KICK IT WITH. AND IS ONLY WITH ME NOW AND A FEW SELECT FRIENDS WE MADE TOGETHER AND NEVER AROUND NE CHICS. HES A GOOD BOY NOW :) SO PPL CAN CHANGE BUT YEA O WELL, HE DID WHAT HE DID, I GOT HIM BACK FOR IT AND NOW WERE DOIN BETTER.. F-U-C-K SIDE S-L-U-T-S!!! IF U R ONE U REALLY HURT A RELATIONSHIP TO ALL HELL!!!





    Wow I'm not even sure what you are saying here,I read it sober took three shots and still don't know.So who's insecure the women that will sleep with a married man or the wives that let themselves be treated like that and still say everything is "fine" with their man.......even though he can never hang out with " NE" chics.




    Edit for freaking auto correct
  • 1Kristine1
    1Kristine1 Posts: 697 Member
    On a different note
    Having strong feelings for someone in a relationship sucks.
    Don't want to mess with their relationship, so you leave it alone, but you want to be happy. And accept friendship as being enough, when it really isn't at the time.
  • Curvimami
    Curvimami Posts: 1,851 Member
    I personally would not ever be the side chick because I know what it feels like to be cheated on, and would never want to make someone else feel like that!

    girl code.
    nuff said!
    Yes to this. Never been the side chick and never will be. I've known a few and all of them have problems with self esteem (I've never known a side chick or dude who didn't know either). But with that said, I wouldn't blame or get too mad at the side chick if my guy was cheating--he's the one in the "committed" relationship. Have some courage and break up before you move on to someone else. A man or women who cheats puts their partner in danger of possibly contracting a VD from #3 not good and really cowardly. Your forcing your partner to have sex with #3 without his/her consent---not cool. Just break up if you're not happy.

    Its irresponsible and just not safe. But I guess when You don't care about anyone but yourself, those important details like VD, AIDS, and babies are put on the back burner. No one thinks about the unsuspecting wife/husband, their body, their health, their psyche and mental health once they discover the indiscretion. I've seen it happen to ppl, it can be very traumatic. But KARMA is very efficient and comes when you least expect it. Therefore one day the cheaters and side pieces will fully understand the pain. They will never understand until then