Why be a side-chick???

galegetsthin

No need to cheat, just let girl one pick the second one out.

I am ALLLLLL for this!!!!!!!!! Lemme go through my FL, we will be right over.

fbmandy55

The world is filled with pathetic, lonely people who hunger for intimacy.
And instead of setting relationship goals and taking the right action to achieve those goals, they just blow around like a reed in the wind.
Losers....

Who says you have to have relationship goals and that there is a certain path you are supposed to take to get them? People have different tastes in relationships, sex, etc. Some couples are perfectly happy in open relationships, some people are not. Some people just enjoy sex (it's human nature) and not relationships.

Who are YOU to judge!?

ekz13

I heard this a while back (not sure where) but it seems to hold water on why people do this


Women need to be given a reason to cheat.... men need to be given a reason not too.


seems relevant

shammxo

My first boyfriend had a "side chick" for 9 of our 18 month relationship. She worked with us, and we were all together on a regular basis.

I just don't get it.

twistofcain

Russ Martin is an expert on side-b1tches.

bethgames

I would have to say it is because so many men, a lot really, dont know the first thing about truly pleasing a woman. When you find one that is 'tuned in' to how this is done, then women tend to come back for more even when they know they are taken. At least that is the only reason I would consider a taken man. Then again, if my husband cheated, I would dump his *kitten*, but I would ask for 'dates' still.....just saying. :blushing: :blushing: :blushing:

4caramel

no drama, just get what u want and go...all smiles

Gerry_Lane

*grabs popcorn*
:glasses:

this is the best comment....We ALL know why we purposely do things we shouldn't do....and do them anyway....so, I'm going to share some popcorn and a nice beverage and watch the show....

Shannon2714

I think most women DO know when they are the "other woman." They either think they can change the guy's mind or they have so little self-respect that they're willing to play second fiddle just to have something. Or they're evil and they just don't care.

Just out of curiousity.

Who is more evil, the side chick (that knows she is) OR the person in the committed relationship doing the cheating?

I'm not sure why someone should be expected to respect a relationship IF one of the people in the relationship obviously have no respect for it themselves.

This...I've never been a "side chick", but I have to think that it would be difficult to take a relationship seriously that HE doesn't respect or take seriously.

Of course, I've been cheated on and I know how much that sucks...so I have to think I wouldn't do that to someone else...

sktllmdrhmz

There's a lot less drama in this thread than I expected. I'll count that as a win. *waits for the ****storm.*

4caramel

true

galegetsthin

The world is filled with pathetic, lonely people who hunger for intimacy.
And instead of setting relationship goals and taking the right action to achieve those goals, they just blow around like a reed in the wind.
Losers....

Really?!?! My relationship goals were at the time to just have fun and be me. Not a loser at all. I am a very successful woman with many great friends, a good job, a great kid, and an even greater rack.

Shannon2714

Then again, if my husband cheated, I would dump his *kitten*, but I would ask for 'dates' still.....just saying. :blushing: :blushing: :blushing:

I freaking love you, Beth! :drinker:

tasiamere

"He wine and dine, but me and you we wine and grind, and when I'm on the field keep it on the sidelines!" - Ghandi

lmaoooooo @ ghandi! I swear that was in Tupac Song I love phahahahahah!

4caramel

SIMPLE ANSWERS: Some are side chicks cause they dont give a damn about someone else relationship, and only care that their needs are met.

Side chicks get to be the guys stress reliever therefore gets the romantic, sweet guy....while the man chick gets the headache and tries to figure why the relationship isnt what it use to be and why the guy has changed......

Shannon2714

There's a lot less drama in this thread than I expected. I'll count that as a win. *waits for the ****storm.*

I don't think you'll be waiting long. Care to share my popcorn?

tasiamere

Call it Karma, Revenge, whatever...All I know is she deserved it...wait *pause* TMI? Too much of a personal connection?

OK Queue Generic response. . .

4caramel

Simply put - the side chick will get all the fun while not having to put up with all the ****... (just my opinion)

right!!!

bethgames

Then again, if my husband cheated, I would dump his *kitten*, but I would ask for 'dates' still.....just saying. :blushing: :blushing: :blushing:

I freaking love you, Beth! :drinker:

Roadie2000

My first boyfriend had a "side chick" for 9 of our 18 month relationship. She worked with us, and we were all together on a regular basis.

I just don't get it.

And he never suggested a threesome? What an idiot.

Just kidding, that's an awful thing to do to someone, but he's still an idiot.

LooseWheel

The side chick doesn't always know. The offender is often the last to find out. My Mum was the last to find out when my Dad was doing the dirty. Family and friends didn't tell her 'because it was akward!!'


So many reasons for cheating....

Sex. simple, its a need and a physical necessity to most of us. (self loving might b fun and easy but it doesnt include the connection level that 'doing it' with others has)

On that note, self loving in a married relationship, may just very well be an option.

Um

Connection, that is an area to go into. We as humans all connect on varying levels. That is why some of us lean towards the physical side of things mostly and others towards the emotional and others towards the mental side of things. Were all different as beings on this earth, if we were exactly the same, we would bloody well connect the same. So we just dont. We all find varying levels for how we connect. Some have higher physical connections and go to the extreme extent of 'getting it elsewhere' for satisfaction. Others, as all you intellegent people can understand, get a different level of the brain and the emo connections right.

The reasons for cheating are really honestly going to be different as there are so many different personalities out there. One persons explanation for love, connection, relationship and emotion is different to the next person. Thats the reason we manage to 'fit' together as couples. It does work in a unison of two people, but that can also mean that it works for more than just one person. Otherwise it would work out that if a couple separates, we would never find love again huh! There is always another person out there in the world that we as individuals will connect with.

We can feel connected with each person within our lives on a differing level. Each person has a different infulence and effect on our lives, and that includes those closer to us in an intimate role. We love others on a scale. It could be as obvious as saying our partners, our husbands/wives are closest because we 'connect' highly on different levels, the emo/physical/mental levels.

OMGosh, I talk tooo much. I'll tell myself to STFU huh. Yeah!

Foxypoo61287

In my situation, one of the side chicks was his ex. :ohwell: He would turn to her and tell her HOW MISERABLE he was with me, and he was going to leave me and go back to her. Painted me out to be this complete miserable old hag. I did what most girls do, keep your friends close & your enemies closer. She stopped having sex with him when she found out I was pregnant, ( although, he disagrees) so we talked, and she found out I was not some miserable person, that he just made me out to look like that bad guy. He never cheated on her, he would just constantly break up with her and go do some other girl and then come back to her, they had some serious emotional ties as well, she had 2 abortions with him. So that was something that you know, kind of kept them attached.

All the other "side chicks" knew he was involved, with a child on the way/ after the baby was born. He needed some & wasn't getting it from me. I don't think I have ever knowingly been a side chick. The ex, who slept with my ex until she found out I was pregnant, to this day she doesn't know why she did the things she did. I guess its just the other person telling us what we want to hear.

ironanimal

All the other "side chicks" knew he was involved, with a child on the way/ after the baby was born. He needed some & wasn't getting it from me. I don't think I have ever knowingly been a side chick. The ex, who slept with my ex until she found out I was pregnant, to this day she doesn't know why she did the things she did. I guess its just the other person telling us what we want to hear.

Foxypoo61287

All the other "side chicks" knew he was involved, with a child on the way/ after the baby was born. He needed some & wasn't getting it from me. I don't think I have ever knowingly been a side chick. The ex, who slept with my ex until she found out I was pregnant, to this day she doesn't know why she did the things she did. I guess its just the other person telling us what we want to hear.

If your bolding that, you don't know what your talking about. Have a kid? 1st you have to wait 6 weeks before partaking in sexual intercourse. Have a newborn? I wasn't living with him because my daughter was born in December, we lived in a 1/1 with NO AC OR HEAT. So, please don't say that he cheated because I wasn't giving him any. It has NOTHING to do with that.

momofJandA

because sometimes things start off innocently enough and then one (in this case the "side chick") gets emotionally involved and actually loves the person she/he is cheating with- with the hopes that one day it will all work out and be rainbows and unicorns . . . not always evil or malicious- but you can't always help who you fall in love with- even if you know its "wrong" . . .

PBsMommy

I use to wonder the same thing as I watched my mom and dad's 18 year marriage crumble to the ground because of infidelity. I finally realized if someone wants to cheat, they are going to. If they want to leave, they will. You trying to stop it or prolong the relationship past what the other wants, only results in much more heartache for you. I really don't understand why people always seem to blame the "side chick/dude" more. Their significant other is just as much at fault, if not more.

Now for those who want to stay with you and with the "side-chick/dude", I lift my middle finger up to you. You're lucky someone hasn't shot or stabbed you.

As my favorite tattoo artist said, as he was jabbing me with a needle, "There would be less cheating and less divorces if one of them would come out and tell the other that their past partner cheated and the police never found enough of the body for full identification.":laugh:

caraiselite

kinda funny, i just saw this on my fb wall

http://www.waaf.com/If-You-ve-Been-Cheated-on--You-ll-Probably-Never-Know/12721726?pid=247913#.T-GywFgUED4.facebook




if i had no interest in sex (which i always thought was overrated), i'd allow my partner to have a sexual relationship with other people.

snix1024

because sometimes things start off innocently enough and then one (in this case the "side chick") gets emotionally involved and actually loves the person she/he is cheating with- with the hopes that one day it will all work out and be rainbows and unicorns . . . not always evil or malicious- but you can't always help who you fall in love with- even if you know its "wrong" . . .

agree

angel_marcelle

I'll put it like this: What one woman won't do, another woman will. The problem is that things get complicated. You get kids, you get a mortgage, you get things in your life that bind you together. The compliments began to wane, things you used to do aren't done anymore. The relationship grows stagnant and stale. It becomes unexciting. In the end, neither party wants to hurt the other. I've been there. So suddenly, someone comes along that makes you feel like a man. They make you feel needed and wanted. It starts innocently enough at first; You're a committed man sworn to forsake all others for this relationship. However, you begin to rationalize things a little differently. You begin to feel that you deserve to be treated better. This other person begins to provide you with everything that your main girl doesn't. She becomes a supplement to what you already have like a protein shake is a supplement to your diet.

It's not right and I don't condone it, but I COMPLETELY understand where those who have been side chics are coming from. I don't find it reprehensible, disgusting, bitter, or even cheating. I know that's how society views it, but then again I don't understand the correlation between love and sex. I understand it on a fundamental level, but I don't understand it on a primal level as it relates to us as humans in regards to evolution, but I digress.

So yeah, it's messed up and people get hurt sometimes. On the other hand people deserve to find their happiness in whatever way they see fit so until you get caught I say Have fun, keep it pimpin', and let it do what it do. I agree with others though: The minute that emotions get involved, cut it loose. Also, the one woman that mentioned the wife knew, I understand that as well. That is a very real situation and happens more often than many here would care to admit. It just depends on so many factors.

Wow. Well said.

Foxypoo61287

There's a lot less drama in this thread than I expected. I'll count that as a win. *waits for the ****storm.*

Lmao I love you!