Positive comments on unhealthy diaries
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welp i'm killing time to digest the low fat frozen yogurt, paleo brownie and sugar free chocolate syrup i ate an hour ago.... don't judge me lol going running the 3 mile trail tomorrow0
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I appreciate the supportive comments, but at the same time, I also appreciate honesty. For example, the other day someone called me on not having enough veggies in my diet....and you know what, she was right. Since then, I have incorporated 2 cups of veggies at dinner, and fruit with breakfast and one of my snacks. That "friend" was doing what a friend does, telling it like it is to **help** you out. I still have changes to make to clean up my diet, and that person set me in motion.0
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What you have to realize about this site is that people who are not healthy come here to find support for getting into a healthy lifestyle of choices. To barrage them with bad thoughts about what they are eating or not eating is what they don't want to hear This is a site where if you see someone eating poorly, we gently inform them that there could be an alternative way to eat what they did. What you are suggesting is the exact way that my parents used to do to me to get me to eat better when I was young. They would barrage me for eating bad things but wouldn't give me the positive support I needed to achieve a healthier lifestyle. They kept a lot of high surgery things in the house as well as not having much in the way of fruits and veggies that were fresh. We are here to gain support in a loving manner and not one that is going to make us want to stop doing what we are doing here. This is not set up to be a hard core forum for healthy eating. If you want that then start your own. As far as the exercise, Many who start here for the first time have not exercised in many years or not at all and are having to slowly get into working out in a positive, injury free way so they can get fit and start to feel good about themselves. When that happens, then there will be room for some gentle criticism. I say hold your tongue until you know their story and the reason behind why they eat and exercise the way they do and then you can make an informed decision. Until then, back off.0
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Paleo = grain, gluten,soy, dairy free (fyi for those that wanted to know)
Thanks for the explanation. I was curious about that term.0 -
I appreciate the supportive comments, but at the same time, I also appreciate honesty. For example, the other day someone called me on not having enough veggies in my diet....and you know what, she was right. Since then, I have incorporated 2 cups of veggies at dinner, and fruit with breakfast and one of my snacks. That "friend" was doing what a friend does, telling it like it is to **help** you out. I still have changes to make to clean up my diet, and that person set me in motion.
BTW, initially I was a little ticked by the firiend's comment to add more veggies, but once I stepped back and took my emotions out of it, I realized she was right. Also, it takes guts to tell it like it is, so kudos to her.
Maybe different tactics work for different people, but a true friend, in my opinion, is a gently honest one.0 -
...digest the low fat frozen yogurt, paleo brownie and sugar free chocolate syrup i ate an hour ago....
If you're paleo, why the low-fat frozen yogurt? Primal allows (some) dairy, but generally not on paleo. And neither advocate "low-fat" but full-fat instead. Stricter paleo also doesn't really recommend eating a bunch of paleoized versions of traditionally "bad" desserts/baked goods. Many will consider that "paleo lite" or "half-assed paleo."
Notice how it doesn't feel good when someone calls you out on your inappropriate food choices? Of course, you'll think they aren't inappropriate, but if I was reading your dairy I would think they were. And then if I threaten to unfriend you because of your food choices? Now that's just mean and unhelpful all around.
My point being MY diary is MY business, no one else's. Support, by definition, means to HOLD UP, not to tear down.0 -
What you have to realize about this site is that people who are not healthy come here to find support for getting into a healthy lifestyle of choices. To barrage them with bad thoughts about what they are eating or not eating is what they don't want to hear This is a site where if you see someone eating poorly, we gently inform them that there could be an alternative way to eat what they did. What you are suggesting is the exact way that my parents used to do to me to get me to eat better when I was young. They would barrage me for eating bad things but wouldn't give me the positive support I needed to achieve a healthier lifestyle. They kept a lot of high surgery things in the house as well as not having much in the way of fruits and veggies that were fresh. We are here to gain support in a loving manner and not one that is going to make us want to stop doing what we are doing here. This is not set up to be a hard core forum for healthy eating. If you want that then start your own. As far as the exercise, Many who start here for the first time have not exercised in many years or not at all and are having to slowly get into working out in a positive, injury free way so they can get fit and start to feel good about themselves. When that happens, then there will be room for some gentle criticism. I say hold your tongue until you know their story and the reason behind why they eat and exercise the way they do and then you can make an informed decision. Until then, back off.
Well written!
Tom
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...digest the low fat frozen yogurt, paleo brownie and sugar free chocolate syrup i ate an hour ago....
If you're paleo, why the low-fat frozen yogurt? Primal allows (some) dairy, but generally not on paleo. And neither advocate "low-fat" but full-fat instead. Stricter paleo also doesn't really recommend eating a bunch of paleoized versions of traditionally "bad" desserts/baked goods. Many will consider that "paleo lite" or "half-assed paleo."
Notice how it doesn't feel good when someone calls you out on your inappropriate food choices? Of course, you'll think they aren't inappropriate, but if I was reading your dairy I would think they were. And then if I threaten to unfriend you because of your food choices? Now that's just mean and unhelpful all around.
My point being MY diary is MY business, no one else's. Support, by definition, means to HOLD UP, not to tear down.
Right on!0 -
...digest the low fat frozen yogurt, paleo brownie and sugar free chocolate syrup i ate an hour ago....
If you're paleo, why the low-fat frozen yogurt? Primal allows (some) dairy, but generally not on paleo. And neither advocate "low-fat" but full-fat instead. Stricter paleo also doesn't really recommend eating a bunch of paleoized versions of traditionally "bad" desserts/baked goods. Many will consider that "paleo lite" or "half-assed paleo."
Notice how it doesn't feel good when someone calls you out on your inappropriate food choices? Of course, you'll think they aren't inappropriate, but if I was reading your dairy I would think they were. And then if I threaten to unfriend you because of your food choices? Now that's just mean and unhelpful all around.
My point being MY diary is MY business, no one else's. Support, by definition, means to HOLD UP, not to tear down.
Right on!
So true!0 -
And when you get to your "goal weight" , you're going to be "skinny fat", but I doubt you'll even be skinny. So, go on and enjoy the junk food
I just... Wow. First off, I'm not choosing sides on the topic and I don't care what either one of your opinions on the topic are. Seriously, I couldn't give a rat's behind. I'm pissed because what right did you have to say that? She's lost 57 pounds already (a major milestone for sure) and will have lost 91 pounds by the end of her journey going by her ticker. Why try to undercut any of her current/future accomplishments (sorry, that's exactly what you were doing) by saying that she'll be "skinny fat" and that you "doubt you'll even be skinny." Who says that to ANYONE trying to lose weight??
:explode:
/end rant0 -
well so.... how about this weather we're having
lol ya'll go so hard.0 -
I'm pretty much just a lurker, I'm pretty new to the message boards, but I wanted to say something on this topic.
I think this entire post is a perfect example of how everyone has a different starting point and different destination. The OP didn't sound like she wanted to attack anyone for making choices she thought were bad, but why people were posting "good job". Which was answered IMO.
I have learned a lot from the message boards, followed by researching the information found on them for myself.
I am amazed at the things I have found, my immediate discovery was that my calorie intake was way too low with exercise, right when I started. I wouldn't have been upset if someone helped me by giving me a little advise to get me going in the right direction.
I have my diary open, I don't eat 'clean' but I do make healthier choices (most of the time).
I mostly have my diary open because as people ask me what I am doing to lose weight, I send them here. I also wanted to give those people the ability to see that not only do I still eat, I eat quite a bit most of the time, and I am still losing but not starving myself. I eat way more now than I ever at ate at my highest weight. I definitely could make many inprovements, but I am making a gradual transition, i intend to gradually adjust my food so that it will be easier for me to uphold.
I haven't been here for the entire journey, I really wish I had found this sooner.
My starting weight was 285, I am 7lbs shy of losing 100lbs. 193 this morning at 5'8". I've even been reassessing my goal weight, didn't think that I could possibly get lower, know I can now. I am in clothes less than half the size I was in a year ago. And with the improved nutrition and exercise, they fit way differently then when I was in this size before.
I agree totally that weight loss will happen through calories alone, whether twinkies or clean, but I also agree that (for most people-not all), the end result may not be what was hoped for. Also, for me, it seems more efficient to try to work on all aspects gradually during the loss, rather than trying to fix things when the scale hits a magic number.
Possibly (my opinion of course- and you know what they say about those too
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The best course of action would be when you send a friend request, to send a note to say where you are, where you intend to be, and your expectations in a Pal, whether it be advise on changing diet and accountability or just some encouragement. That way if you want help and guidance with food and nutrition you can get it, if you just want moral support and a cheerleader you can get that too.
I greatly appreciate the "agree to disagree" and
"lighten up" (though not the first part of that one) comments. These message boards could use more of both.
Though the arguments and ridiculousness does get amusing at times.
Added with edit,
I know I have a lot of sugar in my diary, it is something I do intend to make changes on eventually. I am not soliciting food advice at this time, thanks!0 -
THIS! We all need encouragement, and when friends post the truth on their down days, I know they need even more encouragement to help them along. Nothing succeeds like success!no one is good all the time. i think, as long as my pals are keeping within their goals & exercising, they deserve some encouragement. after all, it does take some courage to log junk food around these parts. i applaud them for being honest, even if their health choices could be a bit better.
I don't say, "Great food choices", obviously! But I do encourage! They do the same for me. Great MFP people!
^^totally true. I'm a person that logs when I snarf down an entire bag of Smartfood. Do I do that daily? No but that being said, I still log it (unlike many people on the site) because it holds me accountable. I try the hardest I can to eat mostly whole foods but I didn't get to be as heavy as I am by eating nothing but whole foods and those are hard habits to break.
The whole reason that I don't have a public food diary is because of many of the comments in this thread :noway:0 -
...digest the low fat frozen yogurt, paleo brownie and sugar free chocolate syrup i ate an hour ago....
If you're paleo, why the low-fat frozen yogurt? Primal allows (some) dairy, but generally not on paleo. And neither advocate "low-fat" but full-fat instead. Stricter paleo also doesn't really recommend eating a bunch of paleoized versions of traditionally "bad" desserts/baked goods. Many will consider that "paleo lite" or "half-assed paleo."
Notice how it doesn't feel good when someone calls you out on your inappropriate food choices? Of course, you'll think they aren't inappropriate, but if I was reading your dairy I would think they were. And then if I threaten to unfriend you because of your food choices? Now that's just mean and unhelpful all around.
My point being MY diary is MY business, no one else's. Support, by definition, means to HOLD UP, not to tear down.
UMMM are you confusing me with another commentor? Bc not once did i said i would rip someone a new one for eating bad, did i? NOPE i said i will not say "good job" on 5 days of pigging out....thats not the proper "encouragement" that person needs, they need motivation to get back on the bandwagon especially if i know their goals. Wow youre upset lol.
Secondly if you read my profile, i don't eat Paleo 100% I mix all my diff eatings together, for my desserts I like my paleo style brownies and cookies with the no grains. But nice try "puttin me in my place" Cute attempt but It DEFINATELY did not hurt my feelings "did feel good when someone calls you out" .....lol i'm not sensitive...in fact i've been an athlete my entire life, i had many of coaches curse me out. so what you said did nothing. Pls reread my comments and then comment correctly to the right person. pls and thx0 -
idk if anyone has said this yet because there are too many comments to read...but i never comment good job on peoples diaries who eat lik 200 calories out their 1200....i just dont think its right and they will fight me to the death saying that eating 200 calories is healthy..but i dont think it is and i wont comment on their diary if thats what it looks like..sometimes ill say maybe they should eat more0
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idk if anyone has said this yet because there are too many comments to read...but i never comment good job on peoples diaries who eat lik 200 calories out their 1200....i just dont think its right and they will fight me to the death saying that eating 200 calories is healthy..but i dont think it is and i wont comment on their diary if thats what it looks like..sometimes ill say maybe they should eat more
I think this is a little different then what the OP is saying, even still I stand by my comment, then again people who eat so little if I try to encourage them to eat more and explain to them that they are sending their bodies into starvation mode and that it can cause them to quit losing weight, if they get attitude with me or don't want the support I offer, I defriend them. That's a start to an Eating Disorder.0 -
Heres a solution for some who say "who cares" or "why comment" there is a "private" setting for diaries, so if a person didn't want to get comments or hear feedback they could change it. Everyone is not going to say what they want to hear, our jobs is to help eachother reach our goals and not give misleading info. If you know my goal is to cut sugar and the past 5 days my sugar has been 100+, why would you say good job? You should say, as my MFP friend "Ok bre lets get that sugar back down" or "next week lets get you back on your sugar goal, you can totally do it" or something of that nature. but every week if i do the same thing and u say great job, good job, way to go, youre not helping me one bit.0
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Heres a solution for some who say "who cares" or "why comment" there is a "private" setting for diaries, so if a person didn't want to get comments or hear feedback they could change it. Everyone is not going to say what they want to hear, our jobs is to help eachother reach our goals and not give misleading info. If you know my goal is to cut sugar and the past 5 days my sugar has been 100+, why would you say good job? You should say, as my MFP friend "Ok bre lets get that sugar back down" or "next week lets get you back on your sugar goal, you can totally do it" or something of that nature. but every week if i do the same thing and u say great job, good job, way to go, youre not helping me one bit.
Couldn't have said it better myself ; )0 -
I dont have time to post on everyone diary so when I see someone who is trying... then I offer yay or awesome.... I live on the positive post of my friends and I want to give it back... even if I dont have time to put a whole post I want them to know that I am seeing that they are trying and Im proud of them... even when they feel they fail.0
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