The man and his horrid comment

lindsyrox

LOL sorry but its funny...
my husband refers to his expanding waist as his PMB (pregnant man belly)... well this weekend he grabbed my middle and commented on my PWB... i said What??? and he said Pregnant woman belly (mind you i'm NOT pregnant)... i was less than pleased. Sometimes (most of the times) men are just dumb, what can you do?

LDM90

That's when you grab his crotch and say "we need to work on this so I have something to grab!" LOL

Brilliant!! I would have said this even if there were no complaints, it would sure make him think twice about saying what he did when he's suppose to have no complaints about you.....
TAKE ME OR LEAVE ME :drinker:

soontobesam

Seems perfectly logical to me. :laugh:

Your picture cracks me up!

taunto

So...you want us to lie to you?

I'm probably going to get chewed out for this but seriously, sometimes we have to tell you that you need to start watching what you eat and hit the gym. Would you rather we start cheating on you (not that I would, just saying) or just plain dump you with the lame "oh its not you, its me" ?

Please, don't make my post a gender issue and I perfectly understand getting hurt over comments like these however, the significant others can be in a hard place and a rock with these situations

Didn't you ever see Bambi?

If you can't say something nice then don't say nothin at all!:laugh:

I actually have never seen Bambi

And while typically I try not to say anything if I can't say anything nice, I'd rather say something that would make me uncomfortable and you a bit hurt for a couple of days than us resenting each other for the rest of the life over something that could be fixed and infact could be a wonderful journey to take together

sofitheteacup

He grabbed my behind and said "Hey we need to tone this up so I have something to grab onto."

I do not want to invalidate your feelings here, because even simple comments from someone we care about can be hurtful, but it really doesn't sound like he was trying to be rude or vicious about it. Props to you for the comeback you made, letting him know that itw as hurtful and inappropriate. But reaction comes across as disproportionate to the comment.
Have you guys had issues over your body before? Does he know you're trying to improve yourself? For all I know it was all about the way he said it, but it just doesn't sound like he meant to be a ****.

Minoesh

Here's this nice guy's thought...

He see the changes in you...and likes it. Makes him frisky. It's his playful way of encouraging you.

Dont always read into the words without understanding his mindset. Ask him. And you will see the above comment is right.

:drinker: :smokin:

soontobesam

men can be fairly daft sometimes and I would imagine that since he is with you it wasn't meant as an insult but he just lost some brain power for a moment and out came a brain fart.

shanice_22

So...you want us to lie to you?

I'm probably going to get chewed out for this but seriously, sometimes we have to tell you that you need to start watching what you eat and hit the gym. Would you rather we start cheating on you (not that I would, just saying) or just plain dump you with the lame "oh its not you, its me" ?

Please, don't make my post a gender issue and I perfectly understand getting hurt over comments like these however, the significant others can be in a hard place and a rock with these situations

Only IF the man doesn't need to lose weight himself though.

fteale

We? WE? Tell him if he tones his you'll join him. Until then, WE are not doing anything.

secretlobster

I love that he uses "we" to mean "you".

Donkey kicks work wonders for the butt, especially when making contact with your *kitten* boyfriend's face

rml_16

So...you want us to lie to you?

I'm probably going to get chewed out for this but seriously, sometimes we have to tell you that you need to start watching what you eat and hit the gym. Would you rather we start cheating on you (not that I would, just saying) or just plain dump you with the lame "oh its not you, its me" ?

Please, don't make my post a gender issue and I perfectly understand getting hurt over comments like these however, the significant others can be in a hard place and a rock with these situations

Yes to I'd rather you dump me. I don't need someone in my life whose love is that conditional.

Don't cheat, though. If it's that bad, end the relationship and move on.

Sorry but I'd rather try and work it out with my SO rather than treat her like a damn object and replace her over a small thing. Point of the post was that sometimes down the line, these kinds of issues comes up where the man or the woman let go. In my case, it was me however if my SO would have done that to me, like poked my belly and made an oink oink noise, while it would have hurt, I woulda buckled up

You are the one who said the alternative was to cheat or leave. And I'm just saying that if those are my choices, that is not a man I want to share my life with and it's better he leaves. "Working it out" with someone who is not a person I want to be with based on such an important part of his personality is not an option.

People age and their bodies change. The woman who has a killer body at 25 might not have a killer body after having children and a full time job and a million other things grabbing her attention by the time she's 40. Not to mention diseases and hormone issues and all sorts of other things that come into play. If you love me for my "perfect" body at 25 but aren't going to love me at 45 with my not-so-perfect body, please tell me at 25 and not at 45 so I can choose a better partner.

odusgolp

So you want us to comment only when you're making bad choices sitting on the couch eating bonbons and putting the jelly back in the roll? This makes no sense. Change your mentality for how you interpret people to a more positive outlook and you become able to accept people for who they are, rather than setting expectations of how you want them to be.

Accepting people for who they are would be accepting their decision to sit on the couch & eat bonbons.

But why should we accept that for the people we care about? I personally want more out of life for my husband, family, friends than a life of sitting indoors eating unhealthy food, probably destined for a myriad of health problems. And I would hope those people would want more for me. Just because you accept someone for who they are, doesn't mean you have to accept their poor decisions/lifestyle choices.

That was directed to the complete contradiction in his post and nothing about when you should or should not discuss a potential health problem with loved ones.

2012newbie

men are from mars, that's a fact LOL......

bpetlock

So...you want us to lie to you?

I'm probably going to get chewed out for this but seriously, sometimes we have to tell you that you need to start watching what you eat and hit the gym. Would you rather we start cheating on you (not that I would, just saying) or just plain dump you with the lame "oh its not you, its me" ?

Please, don't make my post a gender issue and I perfectly understand getting hurt over comments like these however, the significant others can be in a hard place and a rock with these situations

Didn't you ever see Bambi?

If you can't say something nice then don't say nothin at all!:laugh:

I actually have never seen Bambi

And while typically I try not to say anything if I can't say anything nice, I'd rather say something that would make me uncomfortable and you a bit hurt for a couple of days than us resenting each other for the rest of the life over something that could be fixed and infact could be a wonderful journey to take together

It's good you sould see it! Lol!

Anyway, my husband has been honest in the way that he feels about my weight gain and while it didn't make me feel good I forgot that there are two people involved in this relationship and I should be taking care of myself. My husband still thinks I'm beautiful but he wants me to be healthy!

hellraisedfire

Guys need to understand it's all about the words. I mean if I poked my boyfriend in the stomach and said something about toning up and there being too much to hold on to, let's face it, he would be hurt. However, if he ever said something like that to me, guys tell me to "lighten up" and not be hurt by his obvious jokes. Maybe I just suck and use blatant sarcasm too often, but I feel like men AND women BOTH need to work on this two way street. I think SOME women need to lighten up a little, and SOME men need to think about what they say more often. It isn't that men just suck at saying the right thing, because I have plenty of guy friends that can somehow see when I've gotten a haircut or my hair isn't in a ponytail, and they tell me I look beautiful.

Some women you can't win with. "Oh honey you look really great in that dress!" "WHAT, are you saying I don't look great in ALL dresses?! You're a JERK."

Some men, on the other hand, "I think I want to become a vegetarian/become healthier." "Okay... mumble mumble... Can we go to Abe's Hot Dogs for dinner?"

Jem_Girl

He grabbed my behind and said "Hey we need to tone this up so I have something to grab onto."

......So did he want your *kitten* to be bigger or smaller? If he wants something to grab onto then it sounds like bigger, but perhaps "tone" means rounder. It's sounds like he was trying to flirtatiously tease you and it didn't sound as good out loud as it did in his head. :laugh:

I constantly hear that I'm allowed to lose weight but not in my *kitten*. When I point out that this approach is not only unrealistic but would leave me hideously out of proportion, I get some reply about "badonkadonk". Some guys are just *kitten* men. :blushing:

pitbullmama

Wow....I know how that goes. This weekend I was trying on jeans and my guy goes.."I like how they look from the front but they make your butt look funny when you walk" WTF??!! I swear they have no filters!!!

If he was thinking it, other people might have too. I'd rather have my husband tell me if something doesn't look good than to walk around like a doofus all day. Maybe it's just me, but I don't see the problem with this comment.....especially since he did say they looked nice from the front. Sounds like he was offering a valid opinion.

Second this, I'd rather know as well.

NYCDutchess

I love your comeback...seriously...that was great.

Love that you kept your composure.

flyingwrite

So...you want us to lie to you?

I'm probably going to get chewed out for this but seriously, sometimes we have to tell you that you need to start watching what you eat and hit the gym. Would you rather we start cheating on you (not that I would, just saying) or just plain dump you with the lame "oh its not you, its me" ?

Please, don't make my post a gender issue and I perfectly understand getting hurt over comments like these however, the significant others can be in a hard place and a rock with these situations

^^ I agree. If you can't count on your SO to tell you when you need to lay off the cupcakes, who else is gonna tell you?

Why is it up to someone else to tell us when we're gaining weight or making bad choices? If you really want to encourage change, be the change. A couple of weeks after I started working out, my partner started working out. I didn't have to say a word other than how good exercising was making me feel. I didn't have to hurt his feelings or make him feel inadequate. He saw what was lacking in his daily life and stepped up to the plate.

kgprice11

All I have to say about women is.........its a love/hate relationship. You love what they have but hate what they do sometimes

Enjoy your day