Anyone else feel alone on MFP?

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  • yelpat
    yelpat Posts: 414 Member
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    Add me, I'm very supportive :)
  • TheNewo
    TheNewo Posts: 239 Member
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    feel free to add me! I try to be active and supportive but I think that you probably have to have quite a few friends to get the responses you're looking for. I wonder why I don't get many responses but I think it's mostly because I don't have too many people on my friend list
  • ElviraCross
    ElviraCross Posts: 331 Member
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    add me, I'm on every day and try my best to give encouragement to all of my friends!
  • bhankiii
    bhankiii Posts: 217 Member
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    Search for some communities that you have something in common with - location, situation, diet plan, etc. I've found that the friends you meet in these smaller communities make the best friends. Just click on Groups then Search.
  • WarriorCupcakeBlydnsr
    WarriorCupcakeBlydnsr Posts: 2,150 Member
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    Maybe check the stats on the friends, some of that and what you're posting may be why, they can't relate to the problem in the way they think you need them to, so they don't answer. I hesitate to post on comments I see from my friends in my news posts on my home page if it's something I can't relate to- how am I supposed to make you feel better when your baby is screaming it's head off when I can't relate to that situation? The last thing you want to hear from me (a single person-not by choice, but that's a whole other message board issue) is "oh sorry to hear that.." Or if they have a really good day and I'm having a really crummy day, the last thing I want to do is give them empty cheer (the ever popular "good job") or bring them down.
    I do read the posts on my home page and if I feel it's something that I can relate to or help with I absolutely post. I have friends that never post on my comments, but then I also have the ones that when I wasn't on for over a week due to craziness at work poked me to make sure I was okay.
  • senyosmom
    senyosmom Posts: 613 Member
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    Hello! Im sorry you feel alone.... maybe you should revamp your friends list and focus on those how actually offer you support.. maybe seeing a long list of "friends" who never say anything is bringing you down. Could be a shorter list of actual friends is better than a long list of names that say/write nothing.

    I hope you get the support you are looking for and I hope you meet your weight loss goals. Good luck!
  • AnitaVolpato
    AnitaVolpato Posts: 204 Member
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    Here is a fun thing to do.. Seek out people who are outgoing with big personalities on here.. We talk A LOT... ha ha ha. You would probably be sick of me after a week....
  • HarlCarl
    HarlCarl Posts: 266 Member
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    I used to feel alone. Most of my MFP friends are actually family. They miss three or four days at a time, don't post activities and rarely do their diary 100%. The rest of them post a little activity daily and that they met their daily goal but don't show any loss in months.

    I'm not doing this for them, I'm doing this for me.
  • SerenityGelsinger
    SerenityGelsinger Posts: 80 Member
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    That happened to me as well so I don't post on here anymore. I just use it for the calorie counter.
  • Kitten2629
    Kitten2629 Posts: 1,359 Member
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    Yes, I feel alone quite often.. but in a different sense. I have wonderful supportive friends on here, but the ONE person I want support from is my husband. This is supposed to be a lifestyle change for the both of us, but I tend to get looked over. He is also on this site. He is awesome motivation and support for those on his friend list, BUT for me.
  • crcajo
    crcajo Posts: 3
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    Hi thickandthin8! I love to hear the frustration you're having. Not that I'm glad that you feel alone but just to hear someone with the same passion in struggling with weight loss and lack of support makes me feel that I'm not alone either. I started this program a little over a year ago and went MIA for one of the reasons you are expressing. I just recently got back on board on July 1st and all I see are "messages" from me to me. Support or no support, I've got to make this happen this time. Sure, support helps while promoting motivation by other people seeing your dairy. It adds an element of accountability on your part so I understand, but sometimes you just have to suck it up and keep your eye on the prize.

    I know absolutely no one on this board and I'm also struggling with weight loss alone in the real world. I'm the only over weight person in my household and pretty much in my extended family as well. I don't get out much and don't do too well with maintaining relationships (besides my marriage) therefore I have no friends. But I know that I CAN DO this. I've lost 32lbs (the hard way-the only way) and have managed to keep it off for 13 months now. I have about 40lbs to go and as of today, I'm psyched. I have my down moments, sometimes lasting a week or two, but I get back up again.

    WE CAN DO THIS! We can do it together. I'll be here.:smile:

    Sincerely,

    crcajo
  • HiKaren
    HiKaren Posts: 1,306 Member
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    Thats because there are some people who treat their MFP account like its a FB acct... And they get all theses friends on their list, so they can feel "Popular" like they were still in High School.. But you know what they do when they do that???? And we should know its not a good thing already...... They BITE OFF MORE THAN THEY CAN CHEW. How in the world with all those friends, could they ever keep up with the status updates... ??? I believe in a lower quantity, "Quality NOT Quantity" If you have so many friends, and so many that you can't keep up, and be supportive, then what kind of friend does that make them? Maybe they should go on twitter... Cause those kind of people just like to be "Followed" and ADORED for all the attention, but just don't have the time it takes, to comment back.... Alrightee-then.

    Quality, not Quantity. I used to "Follow" a real nice lady here on MFP, she has like 1,000 friends... And shes very successful with her plan. I liked to admire her diary, and her dedication.. but to always comment to her, and she doesn't even know I exsist, or comment back....forget it... Im not a fan of that. I want some interaction with my friends... And 30 is my max limit, to be able to keep up with everyone... If for some reason, one of my friends "Deactivates" their acct... then I would delete, and it would make room for another MFP friend. I have a limit, so that I can pay attention to the friends that I do have. I want them to know I care...... In other cases I usually would not delete... Although there have been some cases, for other reasons.
  • nursenelson
    nursenelson Posts: 295
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    You've been here for over a year, but you don't have many posts and only 10 friends - it's tough to get a lot of feedback with only 10 friends...also...how much feedback to you give your friends?

    My advice - get a lot more friends! But also know that you'll basically have to "give" in order to "receive".


    ^^^^ this
    good luck
  • gin_gin
    gin_gin Posts: 184
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    I have great supportive friends and I support them back as well, if I add new people and they never post or share etc then
    I delete those and get new ones, sometimes people have so many friends its hard to support everyone on their list so I try and keep my friends list at a reasonable count so I can interact with everyone on my list.
  • BigBrewski
    BigBrewski Posts: 922 Member
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    Yes, I feel alone quite often.. but in a different sense. I have wonderful supportive friends on here, but the ONE person I want support from is my husband. This is supposed to be a lifestyle change for the both of us, but I tend to get looked over. He is also on this site. He is awesome motivation and support for those on his friend list, BUT for me.

    Should we give him a "boot to the head, and one for jenny and the whimp"
  • bekkaL85
    bekkaL85 Posts: 133 Member
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    I'm just gonna tell you the truth, about me at least.

    I hardly ever comment on food diaries, unless I know that you have been having a hard time. Mine is public, but alot of my friends' dairies aren't for various reasons. So, I'm pretty much no help to you there.

    I do the same with exercises. It (sadly) takes alot to impress me with that. I'm not talking hard exercises. Walking is one of my biggest workouts. But, if I have noticed that you've slacked off and then got back on the horse (so to speak) then I comment. Basically with exercise and with food dairies, I only comment if I know that you're having trouble but you're trying.

    Every day comments, well...it depends. Sometimes (like right now) I only have an hour or so to be online before RL calls. Sometimes I can't get online, but can get on my phone. Anyone who uses the phone app can tell you comments posting are iffy at best. Sometimes I really have nothing to say, and sometimes (again, honesty) I just don't care. I make sure though, that when I DO have the time to respond I do just that. Respond. Nothing generic, nothing vague. An actual conversation takes place.
  • judybaseel
    judybaseel Posts: 6
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    looks like you are doing great...friend me I will help you out!
    Judy:smile:
  • myohana4
    myohana4 Posts: 205 Member
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    Ok so i joined MFP to get support and support others in their weight loss/fitness goals. My problem? I hardly ever get any support! I post my workouts, what im eating, when im having a good/bad day...all that jaz. Only one or two people will post back to me ever. I mean i dont want a bunch of people who could care less to be posting back "good job" every time. But a little support would be nice. Down my whole page my posts are the only ones that go without comment. Every other friend is getting their support why not me? :frown:

    I honestly feel like i could post i sat on my a** all week and ate nothing but McDonalds and no one would even notice. Very unmotivating. Sorry for complaining, I just wanted to see if anyone else was haiving this issue.

    Look at you! You just went from 10 to 93 friends! That is how it is done! Reach out and people respond.
    MFP is a wonderful supportive community!

    Now get busy commenting on all your new friends' status. And I am sure they will return the favor!
  • stacybell1
    stacybell1 Posts: 1
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    I understand what you are saying, but maybe try to take strength in feeling alone. Remember no one can make you happy unless you are happy with yourself. Keep thinking about your goals and a way to reward yourself when you reach them. . . Good luck. . . and remember. . . you are not alone
  • eln2008
    eln2008 Posts: 20 Member
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    Hi! I just wrote about this on my news feed today. I actually deleted some folks from my friends list who rarely comment or reply to my comments on their profiles. You need people on MFP who can motivate and inspire you. I believe encouragement from others is healthy for us. Feel free to add me as a friend if you would like. We can all use the extra motivation! Take care and God bless!

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